Her
My eyes are droopy from the lack of sleep two days in a row now. So much going inside my head, I had no option but to execute it first thing in the morning.
I had the impulse to throw the trashy piece I wore to sleep last night, out of the terrace. Destroy it... stomp it... burn it. I need to stop thinking about how I almost got whored up by a stranger. More precisely, a lunatic trying to convince himself that I liked his disgusting gift.
But my head is on prey mode. And I refuse to die without giving in my best shot. I’ll calculate my decisions for now.
Based on our conversation, I know he has cameras all over this place, except the washroom which is great news. There can be more in the corridor which is easier to reach, so I slip out in my tracksuit out of the house and down the stairs. Although it’s not as innocent as it seems but cardio was my excuse at it. Can’t let him know that I have planned my escape.
Two weeks. That’s all the time you have to play pretend.
This whole situation has made me look at my life from many different angles. My mom and dad were both happy to hear from me after months. And my relief cemented further when I came to know that they had already forgiven me for my behavior from before.
Not that I had any doubts that they wouldn’t forgive me as soon as I’d mention the reason for calling anyway.
They already had someone in mind when they first talked to me about it six months back. I was offended by the notion of being in a loveless marriage back then. But now, now things have changed. My sense of security and control over my body is worth more than marrying a man of my choice. At least that way I can look in the mirror without losing my pride.
Not that I expect my fiancé to be a bodyguard to my service; but that must surely discourage the lunatic. I mean I am definitely expecting him to back the fuck off.
And shut down whatever insanity my mind is dragging me into. I need to back the fuck off more than him.
The heat between my legs is betraying the thoughts going in my head; that, I’ve already felt last night. And the one before that. I’m not going to let my hormones control me. Not when I’ve been in control of the logical part of my head for as long as I can remember.
At home, everything will be arranged before I arrive, leaving no room for choice. But that doesn’t matter right now; I’ve agreed to it consciously.
On the brighter side, I’ll meet Mahika after almost two years. Things have changed a little between us, but I hope we could talk our hearts out like old times. Who knows?
There’s so much going inside my head that I almost forgot to check my leave application status. I log into my office management system, and look for my leave application, finding it still on pending. I guess the new lead has still not been appointed to take Veer’s place on our team.
Putting on my hoodies, hiding the scars on my neck and chest that are still blue. It will heal by the time I get back home.
Stop panicking... I whisper to myself while rubbing the balm on my lips before heading downstairs for some fresh air. That’s when I spot him.
Nakul is standing in front of our building looking at his phone. I’ve been wondering that every time I need a friendly shoulder to relieve the stress this guy appears magically. Like the one above sends him purposely my way. And I usually tend to lose control of the smile that rises to my lips whenever that happens.
But what I never understand is why I never see him with his friends. I mean he did say that he was living with a friend. But then I can relate. Introverts can be bad when it comes to social interactions, especially in public.
I approach him with a warm smile and at first, he seems normal, then I notice him tense on my approach towards his wounded hand. And why do I feel that something is off about him today.
Perhaps he’s having a shitty time too these days...
I would’ve asked him what had happened for him to hurt his hand so badly, but then at that moment he asked about the mirror and my mood dropped instantly. I don’t want to make the mistake of infuriating the bastard by covering it.
And I could not tell Nakul about it. If fact, I can’t talk about it to anyone. Not even Apeksha.
Not just because I haven’t told them about a supposed stalking. But also, that kind of thing is extremely disgraceful and disturbing for me to describe; even outline.
The fuck am I going to do if this plan fails?
Why is the dread overpowering my commitment towards obtaining complete control over my life?
When did my freedom go downhill?
And the bigger question... How the hell did I not notice?