Chapter 11 #2
“But how could I let her choose us and then lie to her about her own father? About her uncle? About a crime I participated in? It was a big fucking secret to keep before we even got to all the questions I had about why it happened in the first place. Ones I didn’t expect your father was ever going to answer.
I couldn’t betray your dad either. Not after everything he did for me.
He saved my life when he didn’t have to.
If he hadn’t taken me in, I don’t know how many more nights of my dad I would have survived.
How could I take that and not give him the loyalty he deserved in return?
And it wouldn’t have just been me and him with that secret then.
You all would’ve had to keep it too. The resentment, the hate, the questions…
It would have ruined your relationships with him.
With me. How could you or Aspen ever trust me if I’d betrayed the man who kept me safe and fed all those years? ”
“Jesus. I’m so fucking sorry, Bishop. I…” Levi’s at a loss for words, and frankly, so am I. I’ve used them all to confess the thing I thought I’d take to my grave. By the look on Levi’s face, I wonder if I might have made a mistake by not doing just that.
“I didn’t want to tell you even now. I considered not coming back again. But Fallon… Fallon changes everything for me. I want to know my daughter. I need to know her. I want to be there for her and Aspen, especially now that they’re on their own together. Maybe that’s fucking selfish of me, but—”
“No. Don’t even think it.” He shakes his head vehemently.
“Whatever the fallout is from this, I’m glad you told me.
We’ve been trying to piece this puzzle together for so many years, ever since he died, and it always felt like some huge piece was missing.
He was so cagey before his death. I could tell he was hiding something.
But he wouldn’t share it. Now I know why.
” Levi gives me a sympathetic look that turns pained. I’m just grateful he doesn’t blame me.
“I won’t lie and say my daughter wasn’t my first concern.
But I’m worried for you too. I don’t know what the consequences are for Zephyrine and your family if you don’t solve this for whoever’s looking for it.
I didn’t want to keep something from you that could’ve helped.
I just hate that I had to share this with you in the process.
Especially with your dad gone. It feels like I’m talking ill of the dead, and I don’t mean to be. He was a good man despite it.”
“You’re doing what you have to do. I’d do the same in your shoes.
Not an ounce of blame lies at your door for this.
” Levi stares out at the horizon, and despite his steady words, I can see how shaken up he is by the revelation.
I give him a little space, leaning against the balustrade and staring out at the same view.
“I’m not sure of the consequences either.
Nothing good. That’s for sure. That’s all this whole fucking thing has been.
One bloody fucking surprise after another.
Watching this family fall apart and then trying to stitch it back together with half the pieces missing.
I wish I could travel back in time to put a stop to all of it. Maybe they’d still be alive.”
“You can’t think like that either. Whatever this was with your family and the governor’s, it’s not on any of you. They’re all decisions that were made long before you even knew how to make one.” I look back at him over my shoulder.
“Fucking hell. I don’t want to have to tell Grant this. It’ll break him.” He scrubs a hand over his mouth in frustration.
“I’m not keen on telling your sister either.” I lean over the railing of the porch, resting on my elbows and letting my hat shield my eyes from the burning sun. “Seeing the look on her face when I tell her something like this about her father. I don’t even know how to stomach it.”
“I can tell them both if you want.”
“No. I have to tell her. She’ll be furious with me, and I worry she’ll never forgive me or let me see Fallon again. I should have told her the second I came back and let the chips fall where they may.”
“She’ll be angry. I know my sister well enough to know that. But once she has time to think, she’ll understand. I don’t see how she couldn’t.”
“Let’s hope she does, because the only hope we have of getting access to that land is if she gives me permission to take Fallon to see her grandmother.” I’m not even sure that will work. It’s a long shot. But the only one we’ve got.
“It’s not yours? With your old man being gone, I thought…”
I shake my head, pushing off the rail and standing up again.
“He sold it to my grandmother when he was worried his debts were gonna cost him the property. She wants it to stay in the family and plans to leave it to a cousin.”
“Surely we could just sneak out there, find the place you stashed it, and get out before anyone’s the wiser?”
“She’s got security on the property. Some of my dad’s old contacts looted the barn, and now she’s got someone out there patrolling it. Chase’s helping her keep an eye on it, and if he gets wind of something, he’ll jump at the chance to throw me under a bus. Several of them, if he could.”
“Have you looked into the security company? Maybe we can exploit some weaknesses in their schedule.” Levi’s already trying to find a loophole to make this work.
“I was going to ask you if you wanted to look into it. See what you could find. I’ve got a name, but their web presence is pretty sparse. I know you and your friends back East have some contacts that might be able to suss out some more information for us.”
“I can do that. But in the meantime, maybe you’re right that your grandmother’s an easier in. You said she wants to see Fallon? Does she even know she exists?”
“She came down here a while back, stayed at Hazel’s place with some of the women from the assisted living facility.
She remembered this was the ranch I came to when everything went to hell with my dad, and she was snooping around, looking at all the photographs to see if I was in any of them.
Found a picture of Aspen and Fallon.” I look back at my friend, and he’s already smirking as he puts the pieces together.
“And she saw how much Fallon looks like you. The eyes. Guessed she was about the right age.”
I nod. “Don’t let the sweet-old-lady act fool you.
She’s sharp as hell still. She even…”—a burst of laughter cuts off my words—“she even asked if the guy who showers outside was still around and then called back wanting to know if he did any of those firefighter-style calendars. Claimed she was asking for a friend.”
Levi buckles over in laughter alongside me, and it takes us several minutes to get ourselves back to rights. It feels good after such a terrible conversation to still find humor in it all.
“So maybe we just need to send Ramsey up there to sweet-talk her into it.”
“You think you can get Hazel’s permission for that?” I have to stifle my laughter long enough to speak.
“Doubtful. She’s pretty possessive. But we can always try.” He smirks, and we stand there together, imagining Ramsey trying to woo my grandmother into letting us have the land. It gives me one last taste of amusement before I have to return to reality.
I let out a long sigh as I try to think of how we can pull this off. But I have to make it happen, for my daughter’s sake, and Aspen as much as anyone.
“It’ll take me a while to even find where I buried it.
I don’t know if I can remember exactly. I know generally, but it’s been years, and with the way that wildfire tore through down there…
” I make a sharp sound with my tongue against my cheek.
“Not to mention, we’ve only got a couple of weeks before it gets warm. ”
“And not to be crude, but how’s your grandmother’s health?”
“Not great. She’s got a lot of energy, but she’s also got a half dozen health problems stacked on top of each other.
She likes to joke that they’re too busy fighting each other to take her out just yet.
I think she might be on to something. But still…
” I look out at the valley below. “We need time we don’t have. ”
“You bring Fallon to her, and what then? She reconsiders her bargain? Passes it down to her immediate family?”
“That’s the bargain I’m hoping for, yeah. There’s no telling if she’ll bite. Her terms were a little stricter than that.”
“As in?”
“As in she wanted it passed down to family—more than just a kid. She wants us, me or Chase, whichever one of us crosses the line first, to have a wife and a kid, and then she’ll consider rethinking her plans.”
“She said that?”
“When pressed, yes. To my knowledge, my brother doesn’t have any kids.
Then again, neither do I to his. So I’m hoping meeting her granddaughter will change her mind in my favor.
Make her rethink this whole scheme. Fuck, I’d even split the land with him.
Let him have the house and the barns. I just want this strip out here to make sure we can solve your problems and put a buffer between these ranches.
But I have to get Aspen’s permission for all of this first. We’d have to tell Fallon I’m her dad. There’s no way around it.”
“It sounds like you might need more than Aspen’s permission on a Fallon field trip.”
“What do you mean?”
“You marry her, you solve the whole problem.”
I let out a choked laugh, my eyes wide as I stare at my old friend.
“Are we talking about the same person?”
“Wilder things have happened. Look at me and Zeph.”
“I don’t even think holding Aspen captive in the woods would convince her to agree to something like that. If it had been your sister in the same situation as Zeph, she would have sharpened a butter knife while I slept, slit my throat, and left me for dead.”
“Zeph’s a little softer than Aspen, sure. I’ll give you that. But my sister would do anything for the people she loves.”
“The people she loves.” I make a point of emphasizing that last word. Because I don’t think that word would be anywhere in the vocabulary she’d use to describe me right now.
Levi blows out a breath and then looks at me, half amusement and half mischief in his eyes.
“You know how I knew almost immediately when she and Fallon walked into that kitchen that she was yours, despite my completely missing it all those years?” Levi pauses for an answer, but I just shake my head.
I knew Aspen was telling him today, but now I know he’d been suspicious for a long time.
Patiently waiting for one of us to tell him the truth.
“Because I’ve never seen my sister at a loss for words, and I’ve never seen her look at someone the way she looked at you in that moment. ”
“It could just as easily have been hate that you saw.”
“Fine line between love and hate. Razor thin, in my experience. So let’s hope you can cross it if we need you to.”
“You’re not seriously suggesting that—” I stop halfway through when I see that he is, in fact, deadly serious about the idea of me marrying his sister in order to push this scheme forward.
“We’re in this deep now. A little deeper to get out the other side seems reasonable to me.”
“She’ll never agree to it.” I shake my head.
I know Aspen like I know the back of my hand.
People change but their spirit doesn’t. She was tough as nails as a teenager.
As a woman, she’s a force to be reckoned with.
That’s before we get to the impenetrable fortress around her heart.
“She’s gonna hold a grudge until the day I die as it is.
Once I tell her the truth? I’ll have better luck building a snowman in hell. ”
“Then I suggest you start begging for forgiveness at your earliest convenience.”