Chapter Thirty-Five
Chapter Thirty-Five
Graham
I had a plan. It would take at least a year, likely two, of investing in the funds, the four percents, while cutting back unnecessary expenses. I had a budget, and any excess we managed to save would go toward whatever new speculation seemed profitable. It meant a long engagement, but also enough monetary stability that an engagement would even be possible.
Still, I hated it.
I could not say for certain that Mr. Lane would be agreeable. He might make me wait to offer my suit until things were more secure.
Regardless, it would mean asking my family to sacrifice for me when they’d already suffered so much at the hand of my father.
But most of all I hated the nagging feeling in the back of my mind that grew ever more present, a voice telling me that I would never measure up, listing dozens of men who would be better suited, who could give Anna an easier, more comfortable life than I could. Who was I, if I could not care for her as they could?
By the next morning, as I ushered the cow back inside after mucking out her stall, I’d half convinced myself of that truth. In my head, I started listing the reasons why Anna should move on, the foremost being the wretched smell of my current state, and the most compelling being the longevity of my current, and only, plan for a future.
How could I expect such a woman to wait potentially two years or more for me to fix my financial difficulties? How could I ask her to stay when staying meant settling for far less than what she was accustomed to?
I swiped the sweat from my brow, then the dirt and filth from my hands. Back in my room, I sank into a bath, though my family still slumbered. I tried to turn off my thoughts, but they pressed their way into every corner as I cleaned, shaved, dressed. I thought I heard the canter of horses down the drive as I tied my cravat, but a quick glance out the window proved the contrary.
Anna’s father had sent back word that she’d recovered from her headache by nightfall. Still, I couldn’t shirk the feeling that she needed me, couldn’t unsee the dismal look in her eyes as she’d left yesterday. I meant to visit as soon as was appropriate to see her returned to full health. And to tell her of my plan. I could only hope she’d still want this, want us, after I laid it all out before her.
Was that the door?
There—a neigh—absolutely the sound of horses trotting away. I tugged on my jacket and fastened the few buttons before venturing down the hall.
“One—uh—one moment, please. If you’ll just come inside.” Roland’s voice echoed up the staircase.
“I’ll wait here.”
Anna?
I bolted down the stairs, stopping only when Roland met me at the bottom.
The man looked panicked, eyes wide, face pale. “Mr. Everett, Miss Lane has come, and she’s ... Well, she’s insistent, sir, that she see you. There are trunks and trunks, but before I have them moved—”
I patted his arm to reassure him even as I moved around him toward the open door. She stood tall, in a pale-yellow dress, one arm crossed over her middle, holding her other elbow. A coiffure of brown curls peeked out from her hat.
“Anna?” I took a step nearer, and my eyes found the trunks deposited behind her. Her many, many trunks. And her maid, Mariah, being ushered around to the side door.
“Forgive me, Graham, for coming unannounced.” Anna unpinned her hat and tossed it on a trunk. “I fear I am in a bit of a tight spot. And I am hopeful for a moment of your time.”
I took her hand in mine and drew her close, relaxing when she let me wrap my arms around her waist. “What has happened? Where is your father?”
She leaned back in my hold and winced. “I’m afraid I am rather homeless at the moment.”
I refocused on the trunks surrounding us, then Anna’s pinched look, her half smile.
“I’ve bought the land,” she said.
Slowly, her words sank into me. What? I nearly let go of her and laughed.“We shouldn’t jest over such things. But I am glad you came. I have a plan. One that I think will be enough to save us.”
She swallowed hard, her half smile dropping into a frown that made my stomach fill with nerves. “I made an agreement with my father,” Anna said in that same serious voice. “I asked for my dowry early so that I could invest it.” She raised her chin, sure and confident in herself. Or trying to seem that way, at least.
She couldn’t mean what I thought. That much land would cost a fortune. Then, again, there was always talk about how Anna’s dowry would be paired with whatever her mother had left her. But surely she wouldn’t have—
“As it turns out,” she continued as I stood there, speechless and full of assumptions, “your friend, the seller, liked me quite a lot when my father and I paid him a call yesterday. Especially when I told him how dearly I love you, and surprisingly, how dearly I’ve come to love Brighton.”
“Anna,” I managed weakly. “Are you saying you’ve bought my land?”
“Well, you weren’t planning to buy it, were you?”
“People will talk.”
She shrugged. “Let them. At any rate, I need a partner. Someone who will ensure that I succeed in my endeavor to develop it and rent out the houses for an annual income. I know nothing about anything, and I am quite overwhelmed.”
I was frozen. A statue. I tried to speak, but nothing came out.
She was brilliant.
Absolutely, beautifully, brilliant.
Anna persevered. “Of course, that will mean a quick wedding. Since my father has now, lovingly, cast me to the wayside and I am indeed quite homeless at the moment.” Then she pointed her finger at my chest. “But be warned: I am no fool, so I’ll expect a good return on my money. I’ll want my dowry back plus a ten percent increase, which shall be agreed upon in our marriage contract.”
“Ten percent.” I laughed, and she held her head high, raising her brows with a determined smile.
“Is that a yes, then? Oh, and I shall need a place to stay before the wedding. My father and I came to an agreement. If I am to make such a big decision, I must see it through myself. Alone.”
“Alone?”
“All alone.” Her smile faltered before instantly recovering. “Thus the homelessness. Indeed, as it turns out, going it alone is quite terrifying, and I am not enjoying the solitude. But I must admit, making my own decisions and planning for myself is quite freeing.”
I smiled proudly. There shined the woman I loved. But I could not let her make such a sacrifice. Not on my behalf.
“As generous of a bargain as this is, I’ve already got things sorted. Indeed, I spent all night thinking through details, making a plan.” As long-suffering as it would be. I raked a hand through my hair.
She held up a hand. A deepening crease touched her brow. “Whatever plan you’ve made will have to wait. This is the best opportunity for us, for our family, and I won’t let you pass it by because of something completely outside of your control. The deal is already done. I own the land, and the man I marry will have rights to it. I would like that man to be you. Let me invest in you, Graham. I trust you, and I believe we can make a future here.”
It all sounded too good. Too perfect. “But you hate Brighton.”
As though she’d been waiting for that argument, she turned round to where her satchel waited atop one of her trunks. “Here,” she said, handing me her notebook. “Read it.”
“I hardly think—”
She flung the thing at me. “I promised you could. Take it. Read the pages. There’s not that much; I became distracted by the end. But I meant every word.” She grabbed my wrist and tugged me toward a waiting trunk, forcing me to sit.
I looked up at her with patient frustration.
With a huff of irritation, she took the notebook from my hands and read aloud. “Day one: frustrating indeed. Mr. Everett insisted on riding inside the carriage though the weather was plenty fine to ride.” She looked down at me with mock disapproval. “His home, however, is lovely. The view from my balcony window is priceless.” She turned a page, reading silently down the page a bit. “Day two: Brighton’s shores are rocky and unstable. The water chilly, and at times rather brown. Beautiful shells can be found, and the view all around, stunning. Easy to envision families here, laid out with a picnic blanket, perhaps with more than a handful of pillows, enjoying the sun together.”
I was silent. She’d written something nice. She turned a page and handed the notebook back to me.
I reached inside my jacket and pulled out my spectacles, admiring her silky, rounded scrawl.
Days three and four:
The Steine is pleasant, busy, with nearly every shop a person could want. More shops will likely come, though how sustainable they will be long-term and in the off-season is questionable. I particularly love the expansive lending library, which is a central spot for tourists. However, I found the catalog lacking in comparison to London’s.
More about the sea. A whole paragraph with positive thoughts concerning the land and its location. I passed over a small paragraph about Lennox. Then read,
The Assembly Rooms are more than adequate for dancing the waltz with a clumsy, albeit handsome, well-intentioned gentleman.
“Clumsy?”
Her eyes brightened, clearly remembering what she’d written, and she grinned. “You cannot have it all, Graham.”
I raised a brow, but I could not help the slightest twitch of a smile.
Day five:
Tourists should come here for the prawns alone. They are heaven on a plate. The Marine Pavilion is lovely, especially its gardens and stable house. I’d love a tour inside, but the opportunity did not arise. Perhaps another time.
The most interesting part of Brighton is when the fishermen come to cast their nets just before sunset. The men appear weary and worn, yet somehow jovial and excited for the night ahead. There is room here for greater tourism, beside the already established bathhouse nearby. I cannot say I love it, but I believe in its future. I do think Brighton will continue to flourish.
And more, I have come to find Graham the most capable of partners. He takes life’s reins with a sure hand, always planning three steps ahead, and always thoughtful of my needs, sometimes before I’ve even considered them. He is unlike any man of my acquaintance.
I’d searched for someone like Graham in all the wrong places. And when we met, I dismissed him. Worked against him. And I regret it. But as is the case with any mistake, the best course is to move forward. I think back at all the time we wasted hating each other, but in truth, had Graham and I not argued for the last few years, I do not know that we could’ve understood each other as well as we do now. He is strong and capable and so smart I should feel insignificant, and yet, he’d never let me. He builds me up. He challenges me and returns my barbs tenfold in every direction. I do not know how we missed each other, but I am resolved to never lose Graham Everett again.
I turned the page, but there was nothing more. She’d stopped writing.
“I could’ve gone on, but you’ve kept me quite occupied of late. And the more time we spent together, the less I wanted to scourge you with my note-taking.”
I chuckled, heart bursting, and resisted the urge to reread her every word. I removed my spectacles and studied the arms on each end.
“This investment is a huge undertaking, Anna. I love you for offering, but I am certain we can reverse this deal. I cannot let you spend every penny you have to secure an investment that may not pay out for years.”
“Well, most of it came to me from my mother. And though I did not know her, I imagine she’d approve of me following my heart. The other bit came from my dowry, which Papa was more than happy to supply early as he fully supports my scheming you into marriage.” She leaned in and whispered, “Though, in truth, he is waiting in town should you lose your head and reject my offer. Which you won’t. Because, as you said, you love me. And you know this is the only way forward. The only way you and I can have everything we want.”
“Are you certain this is what you want?”
“How close did we get last time? Seventy-five percent?”
“Anna.”
She laughed, stepping in between my legs. Then she wrapped her arms around my neck. “I am one hundred percent sure that you, Graham Everett, are the greatest love I shall ever find. And I am one million percent sure that this life we are creating together will be worth every penny.”
“Worth risking everything?”
“If you want me as badly as I want you.”
I gripped her waist. “I want you,” I whispered, coaxing her down onto my leg. I reached up and brushed her jaw, thumbing her bottom lip. The weight of her on my thigh felt both rushing and grounding, with no room left to think.
She slid her fingertips up my chest, past the nape my neck, and into my hair, sending shivers all through me.
I tilted back to look up at her, at the fire burning brightly in her eyes.
She drew close, then pressed her lips to mine.
Jasmine and cherries. Anna.
I could not let her go. I traced my hand along the curve of her side and back down over her waist, our arms tangling together, desperate to touch, to feel, to hold on. She laughed, letting her head fall back, and I grazed every inch of her neck with my lips, feasting upon the vibrations of her laughter all the way back to her mouth. Her body in my arms made me feel, despite my unworthiness, completely and irrevocably whole.
“Say something,” she said against my lips. “Tell me you’re happy.”
“I am very happy,” I said, kissing the creases of her mouth. “Albeit a little cross.”
She pulled back. “Because I surprised you?”
“Because you had to at all.”
“I won’t do it again, I promise,” she said earnestly as I tugged on the loose curls dangling from her coiffure.
I didn’t like her frown. Indeed, I never wanted to see her frown again.
“I’m so sorry, Anna. I wanted to offer you the world, but all I have is Highcliffe House and a dwindling savings.”
“And a cow.” She pressed her nose to mine. “And the sea.”
“All the poppies you want,” I offered to sweeten the deal.
“And a dead eel,” she added. “Oh! And I forgot to say this earlier, about my business proposal.” She straightened, looking more professional and serious again. “I’d like the balcony room for the duration of my stay. You may be permitted to join me after our nuptials.”
“May be? I do not know how I feel about that phrase. Shall we draw the contract up together this afternoon?”
“As soon as possible, please. Also, in all seriousness, I am now poor, and I left the inn before breaking my fast.”
I kissed my way up her jawline to whisper in her ear, “My love, are you hungry?”
She tilted her head. “Starved, dearest.”
“She’s back!” We heard Tabs’s shriek before her little body appeared in the doorway. Her hair was braided and fuzzy from sleep, and she still wore her frilly nightdress. “Have you told her, Graham? That you love her and want to keep her forever?”
I looked at Anna, into those gorgeous, golden-brown eyes. “Can I keep you forever? Even if everything falls apart and all we have left is each other?”
She took my face in her hands and grinned, nodding. “Surely you know by now, Graham—all I want is you.”