Chapter Eleven #2
Mother Michael was not easy to locate. Every time Estevan tried to ask one of the women he came in contact with, she would shake her head and run away.
Mother Michael didn’t exactly ban the men from going to any other part of the abbey, though she had tried to keep them sequestered in the abbey, but this was a special exception.
If Estevan couldn’t find someone to fetch the woman, then he would have to fetch her himself.
First, they checked the outdoor spaces before proceeding into the cloisters, which he wasn’t particularly eager to do.
The cloisters were part of the original castle that had been built so long ago.
There were outbuildings and an old keep that had been linked over the years by covered walkways or poorly built corridors.
The whole complex was rather odd that way.
As they crossed the bailey, passing the living quarters and heading toward the kitchens and the stables, they ran across chickens and dogs and, on occasion, a child.
The abbey was famous for being a foundling home, but Estevan realized that the entire time they’d been there, they hadn’t seen any children at all.
Not that it was unusual, because children didn’t normally roam freely in a place like this, but he was curious where the children were being kept.
He found out soon enough.
He also found Anaxandra.
To the east of what was formerly the keep was a section of the bailey that had been transformed into vegetable gardens.
Most castles wouldn’t plant their food source outside of the walls if they could help it, because food could be stolen, and the same school of thought seemed to apply to the abbey.
There were neat rows of greenery, and he could see several children and adults working the garden.
It was quite muddy from all of the rain, so everyone was covered from wrist to elbow with dark mud.
Anaxandra was at the end of the garden, taking baskets from the children who had picked the vegetables and then dumping those vegetables into a small cart.
Estevan paused a moment just to watch her work.
He had only ever seen the woman with the crossbow in her hands, tough and unwavering, so he was coming to associate her with a soldierlike mentality.
Certainly, she’d had that mentality with him ever since they’d been introduced.
After the scene in Dumfries left him frustrated when he tried to get to know her a little, he had to admit that he was surprised to see her in peasant clothing, working alongside the children.
More surprising still, she was actually smiling.
It was the most relaxed he’d ever seen her.
In his opinion, how a person behaved toward animals and children told a lot about their character.
He could see that she was quite patient with the little ones and instructing them in a kind but firm manner.
The more he watched, the more impressed he became.
He had genuinely been afraid that she had no idea how to be kind or generous, but he could see that wasn’t the case.
He began to feel guilty about getting angry with her.
Perhaps he needed to apologize.
“Es? Did you hear me?”
Titan was talking to him. No, he hadn’t heard him. He’d been too swept up in the sight of Anaxandra. Quickly, perhaps too quickly, he answered.
“Aye, I heard ye,” he said. “I dunna see Mother Michael here, but I can ask Anaxandra where she is. Hopefully she willna run from me, too.”
Titan could see the young woman with the long blonde braids and the face of an angel, helping with the garden. Realizing that was what Estevan had been looking at, he chuckled low in his throat.
“I said that there seems to be a small chapel to the left,” he said, pointing to what appeared to be oriel windows built into the northern wall of the garden. “I suggested we look there, but you can just as easily ask Anaxandra. I’ll wait for you here.”
Estevan was struggling not to be embarrassed.
Casting the man a threatening glare as Titan continued to chuckle, he headed in Anaxandra’s direction, skirting the muddy garden until he came within range of her.
She was just dumping another basket of carrots into the wagon, and, frankly, he could feel himself becoming interested in her far more than he should have.
He thought she was a lovely lass, beautiful in fact, and he was curious about her, but he thought he had curbed it.
Any tasks they’d completed together had been all business.
When he’d try to pry into her life in Dumfries, she’d shut him down.
But that only made him more curious about her, and that could be a dangerous game with a Lady Templar involved.
God help him, he knew that.
But he didn’t care.
*
She could see him coming.
Anaxandra had spent the past hour thinking about the journey to Dumfries. It wasn’t necessarily the apothecary that she was thinking about, that vulgar woman who seemed quite interested in Estevan, but more the interaction between her and Estevan at the tavern.
The necklace he’d purchased for her was around her neck, tucked down deep into her tunic.
She was terrified of losing it or having somebody steal it, so even if she wasn’t sure why he’d bought the thing, she didn’t want anything to happen to it.
She had to admit that it was quite beautiful, and perhaps that was the problem—she liked it.
She’d never known anyone to be generous with her, and certainly not a man, so that had confused her.
Confusion had made her guarded. She simply didn’t know enough about men to know whether or not Estevan was toying with her or if he was sincere.
The truth was she didn’t know anything at all.
Anaxandra didn’t know how to talk to a man.
She didn’t know how to behave when he talked to her.
She didn’t even know how to react when he bought her a gift simply because he wanted to.
All of those events, when it came to Estevan, had made her combative, and that certainly wasn’t the reaction she should have given him.
She’d spent her entire life being told that men were vile creatures who were only out to hurt women, but Estevan had not proven that point.
At least, not so far. In fact, none of the men who were with him had shown anything other than concern and courtesy.
And then there was Mother Michael.
Anaxandra had watched Mother Michael interact with Estevan.
She had not seemed defensive or frightened or any of the other emotions that were supposed to stir in a woman’s soul when she was around a man.
There was no hurt or fear. In fact, Mother Michael seemed to be quite tolerant of their presence and had even shown kindness to them, especially in the case of the sick knight.
She seemed to show a good deal of concern for him.
That was most definitely not what Mother Michael had been teaching all of these years.
Anaxandra had never had any reason to doubt the teachings of Mother Michael, as they were teachings that had come down from previous abbesses.
It was all of the opinions of Lady Agnes Herries, a well-known man hater.
Anaxandra had never considered that the standards by which they all lived to be a farce, but with the introduction of five polite men, it was possible that Lady Agnes had been wrong.
Anaxandra simply didn’t know what to think anymore.
One thing was for certain, however. As difficult as it was for her to even consider that everything she’d been taught was a lie, she suspected that she needed to apologize to Estevan after being so unfriendly with him in Dumfries.
After he’d bought her an expensive gift, no less.
The truth was that she didn’t know anything about the man who had bought her the gift.
She didn’t know his heart or his character.
But she did regret the incident in Dumfries.
She simply didn’t know how to tell him.
On this day, it was her turn to work with the children in the garden, making a late summer harvest of some of their vegetables.
Members of her Bow Pack were working there as well.
The foundlings—all eleven of them—were in the garden, pulling vegetables under the watchful eye of Sister Hildegarde, who was snapping at them one moment and praising them the next.
Anaxandra had to grin when the woman broke up a fight between two little brothers.
She thought the woman was at her best when she was dealing with young children.
Like she was a natural mother. Perhaps they were instincts, or perhaps learned behavior, but as Anaxandra watched Sister Hildegarde, she wondered how good of a mother she herself would be.
If she ever had children. The truth was that she hoped to, someday.
But not if she didn’t learn how to behave around a man.
Speaking of children…
Anaxandra caught sight of Estevan and another knight as they entered the garden area.
She pretended to be busy, still going about her duties, but she was keeping an eye on them.
When Estevan broke away from the other man and headed in her direction, she could feel her heart begin to race.
Was it fear? Or was it something else? She truly didn’t know.
All she knew was that the sight of him was making her breathless.
“What are you doing here?” she asked as he came near. “Did you come to help?”
She didn’t know why she asked him that. It was just something to say, nervous chatter. But he took it as a joke.
“I’ll help if ye need it,” he said, smiling. “But it looks as if ye have plenty of help. They’re doing a fine job.”