Chapter Seventeen
The fog hadn’t lifted by morning, but at least there was some light to see by now.
It was very little light, but it was enough. The women could move about the bailey without running into anything, but the land was still coated in mist. It touched everything, wet and cold.
The morning meal was being prepared and the smell of smoke, trapped by the fog, was heavy in the air.
The children were up and moving, carrying water and supplies into the sanctuary under Mateo and Sister Hildegarde’s supervision, while Mother Michael and Anaxandra were handling the general protection of the abbey.
Unfortunately, that ran counter to a few things that Estevan and Titan wanted to do, so at present, Estevan was trying to prevent a battle from breaking out.
Literally.
“Mother, I mean no disrespect, but have ye ever had tae defend St. Margaret’s?” Estevan asked as politely as he could. “Because it is different from being summoned tae fight another man’s battle. When yer home is attacked, ye must have certain protocols in place.”
Mother Michael was in full battle regalia this morning, which surprisingly consisted of chain mail that had been passed down from one mother abbess to the next.
It was old, but it was serviceable. Her white hair was cut close to her scalp, wet with the mist, but her face was red with displeasure.
She didn’t like these men telling her what to do when it came to the protection of the abbey.
Mother knew best.
“The abbey has stood for over one hundred years, young lord,” she said pointedly. “It can stand against a group of men from the sea just as it is.”
Estevan was struggling with his patience.
“All I need ye tae do is open the gates and let the mist soak intae the portcullis,” he said.
“We need the wood tae be wet so it canna burn should the enemy decide tae light it afire. It’s an older portcullis and the wood is splintering. We must soak it so it canna burn.”
Mother Michael’s solution to shoring up the security of St. Margaret’s was to keep everything closed, including the big gates, which were already soaked from the mist. They protected the portcullis, which had seen better days.
Estevan was just trying to make the gatehouse less vulnerable, but she didn’t seem to like that.
“I will think on it,” she finally said. When he opened his mouth to argue, she put her hand up to silence him. “I know you are trying to help, but this place has stood for a very long time. We do have some experience in protecting it.”
Estevan sighed heavily and looked at Titan, who simply shook his head.
He’d already had his own argument with Mother Michael about bricking up the postern gate.
There were stones in an unused outbuilding that were from the building of the walkways and corridors decades ago, along with barrels of lime and sand.
It was old, and some of it had already hardened, but they still had enough to use to block up the postern gate, which was not particularly stable.
But Mother Michael wouldn’t hear of it.
“Mother, we’re not contesting your ability to protect your women and children,” Titan finally said. “We are simply offering a fresh eye to what may be a weakness in your defenses. Both Estevan and I have years of education and experience in this matter. We are trying to help you.”
Mother Michael eyed the big knight. “I realize that,” she said.
“And I further realize that you are a de Wolfe. Your family practically rules the north of England and southern Scotland right along with it, so you are accustomed to being in control. However, I am telling you that we do not need your suggestions. If you are to remain, I would appreciate it if you would simply do as I command. Can you do that or not?”
Estevan mumbled something that sounded like an affirmative, but Titan simply cocked an eyebrow.
“We can follow commands,” he said in a low voice.
“But a good commander knows when to take the advice of his seasoned men. A good commander does not shut out reasonable suggestions. A commander who does not to do these things risks catastrophically failing, so aye, we will follow your commands, but if your command will risk my life or the life of my friends, I will not follow it. And you will know why because I will tell you. I hope we are clear on that because you are traveling down a dangerous path with your inability to listen to anyone other than yourself.”
With that, he turned away and headed toward the sanctuary that was a hive of activity at the moment. Estevan’s gaze lingered on the woman, who seemed somewhat humbled by the scolding, but when she saw that Estevan was looking at her, she quickly walked away.
That left Estevan and Anaxandra alone.
“She has been doing this for a long time,” Anaxandra said softly, offering up an excuse. “She has never taken orders from anyone. It is difficult for her to do so.”
Estevan looked at her. She was still clad in the clothing she’d had on the night before, her hair and ponytail wet from the mist, her face pale but her eyes bright.
She’d been up all night, like the rest of them, but Estevan swore he’d never seen a more beautiful woman.
His desire to keep her safe was like a runaway bull, almost uncontrollable, and Mother Michael’s refusals were frustrating to say the least.
“No one was giving her orders,” he said. “We were simply suggesting a few minor things that may be very helpful in the end. ’Tis a stubborn woman who refuses help.”
Anaxandra nodded. “I know,” she said. “It is simply her way.”
“I hope her way doesn’t get us all killed.”
Anaxandra nodded weakly, feeling his frustration, but there was also something else she was feeling.
His lips on her mouth.
Whatever he’d done to her yesterday had started a fire inside of her.
It was difficult to describe because she’d never felt anything like it before, but the best way she could explain it was that her lips were still hot where he’d touched her.
His heat against her heat, so hard and so firm, had left a mark, like a branding.
His lips had branded her.
Truth be told, Anaxandra didn’t even really know what a kiss was. She had only seen it once or twice, and that had been between some of the older women. They were kisses of friendship, or of greeting, but that wasn’t something she had ever done herself or had ever personally experienced.
Until last night.
Now, it was all she could think about. Even as she’d patrolled the wall last night, in the mist, her entire body may have been cold, but her lips were still warm with his touch.
Estevan had been around all night, but any eye contact between them had Alexandra blushing so furiously that she was positive her head would go up in flames.
He simply smiled at her while she had stood there and reeked of embarrassment.
But it wasn’t that she was embarrassed he had kissed her.
It was the fact that she had liked it. Even now as she looked at him, she wanted him to do it again.
“Estevan,” she said quietly, “may I ask you something?”
“Anything.”
“Did you mean what you said last night?” she said. “About courting me?”
The mere mention of it caused a smile to spread across his lips. “And if I did?”
She wasn’t sure how to answer that at first. “What does it all mean?” she said. “You never did tell me what a courting is.”
His smile grew as they veered onto a far more pleasing subject than battle defenses. “It is very simple,” he said. “It means that I want tae come tae know ye, and ye want tae come tae know me, and we spend time together before we’re married.”
“Time together doing what?”
He shrugged. “Anything,” he said. “I’ve thought a little about this.
In fact, I was thinking about it last night when I should have been thinking about the owl sounds that stopped around midnight.
But I was thinking of taking ye tae the Hydra, where my family lives, where ye could live with my mother and sister and learn how tae be a lady.
No offense tae the skills ye have now, but when I marry, I’d like my wife tae manage my home. Do ye know how tae?”
She frowned. “Nay,” she admitted. “What do I do?”
“My mother would teach ye,” he said. “Would ye be willing tae learn?”
Anaxandra simply stared at him. He could see the emotions rolling through her eyes, finally rippling across her face.
She wasn’t any good at concealing her thoughts because she’d never needed to.
She was delighted, she was afraid, she was in disbelief.
Estevan could read them in turn, one at a time.
Finally, she shook her head.
“Sir,” she whispered, “are you truly serious about this?”
He nodded, his eyes glimmering with warmth.
“Very much,” he said. “Dunna ask me how or why, because I dunna know. All I know is that I see something in ye that is rare. Ye’re unlike anyone I’ve ever known.
I could leave today, but I’d never forget about ye, Anaxandra.
I’d always wonder about ye and I’d make it a point tae return, just tae see ye.
I know ye dunna know anything about men, or what happens between men and women, but I promise that if ye’ll give me a chance, I’ll show ye.
Maybe we can both learn how wonderful it can be. ”
Anaxandra didn’t know what to say, but his words made her cheeks flush again.
With the cold weather, it was obvious. He started to laugh because she was flushing a deep red, so she giggled and lowered her face, trying to cover it with a hand.
Reaching out, he took that hand away from her face and held it.
“Just think on it,” he said. “I’m not asking for yer agreement now, but I want ye tae think on it. I can offer ye everything ye have dreamt of, Anaxandra. A home, children. And a husband who would be loyal tae ye, and only ye, until the day he died.”