Chapter Nine #6
It wouldn’t do to tell him the truth; I had a distinct feeling it would lead to the imminent death of Aleck—or of my husband himself if he were to be bested by my father’s officer, although that scenario seemed unlikely.
And as much as I hoped to keep as much distance between myself and Aleck as I possibly could, I wasn’t sure I wanted to be the cause of his demise.
“This was my mother’s room,” I said, making a point of keeping my voice emotionless.
“It will be perfect for us,” he said. “Far removed from the other residence chambers. Our own wing.”
I didn’t bother telling him my father would never allow such a thing. Kade looked out the window, appreciating the view. “Kinloch is just beyond those hills,” he said, clearly cheered by the thought.
It did intrigue me to see him always visibly brighten when he thought of his home and his family.
He had sacrificed much to fulfill the duty of marrying me, I knew.
A part of me wanted to ease his longing and his homesickness, to make his sacrifice easier to bear.
But my sister, it seemed, had already stepped up to do exactly that.
I guessed Kade’s homesickness wasn’t quite so acute as it might have been only a day or two ago.
Drawing back from him, I held my hands low at my throat, where my dress was clenched tightly in my fists, closed now, revealing nothing.
Kade hesitated. Then, carefully, as though wary of spooking me, he climbed into the turret to sit next to me, and the small space became even smaller with his large presence filling it.
He looked entirely out of place. His size and his clanging arsenal seemed entirely excessive in the feminine, pink-cushioned enclosure of the turret.
He unbuckled one of his many belts, placing his sword to the side. His eyes traced the line of my tear tracks down one cheek. He fingered a long strand of my hair in a disarmingly affectionate gesture. “Tell me what has you upset. And why you’re hiding.”
“I tried to do as you asked,” I said, a mild defiance coloring my words; I had been too thoroughly reminded of my weaknesses only hours ago. “They wouldn’t listen to me. They take orders only from my father.”
“Then we will go have a word with them,” he said, but he made no move yet to leave.
Kade was sitting close to me—he had no other choice in the confined space.
My gaze traveled up his powerful arms and his wide shoulders.
His hand rested loosely around the leather strap at his chest: strong brown hands that had killed countless men and seduced willing women.
My sister among them. The thought caused my inner chest to tighten.
From disappointment perhaps. I’d known he was a reckless brute all along.
Of course I’d hoped otherwise. Glimpses of his humanness over past days only succeeded in making his betrayal all the more disheartening now.
He contemplated me, his eyes as pale as blue quartz crystals in the afternoon sunlight.
The glint of his hair caught shards of red, and his lips—I hadn’t noticed it before now—were perfectly shaped.
As he’d once commented about mine, I remembered.
I thought of those full lips on Maisie, kissing her, tasting her.
He did unspeakable things. Whatever these things might be, I didn’t even want to consider.
My husband leaned closer, very slowly. I tried to shrink away from his touch, but there was nowhere to go.
His finger teased the strand of my hair he still held, coiled loosely around his finger.
His other hand rested on my clenched fist, enclosing it in his own.
“I’ve seen you look at me with profound fear—which lingers in you even now.
I’ve seen you look at me with hopeful defiance, and even with something akin to desire.
This look is different, wife. Tell me what it’s about. ”
I remained silent, noticing the length of his eyelashes, dark against the strikingly pale hue of his eyes. His warrior’s hands were unclenching my fists, burrowing and loosening my grip.
“Tell me,” he repeated, finally succeeding in releasing my hold.
I had a fleeting thought, at the bruised edge to his inquisition, that he saw me as his only friend, his only confidante, in this unwelcoming and foreign setting.
For someone used to brothers and sisters and a close-knit clan from whom he’d never been separated, it must have been a big change for him.
He was alone among our Morrison clan with no companions, save me.
And I’d hardly shown him the kind of supportive camaraderie he was used to.
If it hadn’t been for the news of my sister’s recent offers to him, I would have.
As it was, I was still reeling from my confrontation with Aleck.
And all I could think of when I looked at Kade was his strong hands...
on her. His warrior’s grip on her bountiful body and her plush curves.
And I was surprised by the amount of emotional poison the image infused me with.
“All right, I’ll tell you, husband.” The address sounded jeering and sarcastic.
“You said to me you wanted my consent and you were prepared to wait for it. Something about...” I recalled his words.
“If I’m not mistaken, you said that you wouldn’t feel you were an ‘honorable’ man if you felt I was unsure.
Did I get that right? You even said that if it took longer than a month, then ‘so be it’—I believe those were your exact words.
” I paused to glower at him. “What I say, husband, is that your definition of honorable is laughable! Not that I’m overly familiar with such a concept to begin with, I’ll admit.
” I was ranting now but I couldn’t stop myself.
I was too outraged. “I know you’ve been with my sister.
And I want you to know I’ll have nothing to do with you, not willingly.
Ever. A month isn’t long enough. Nor a year.
A decade! It’ll be an entire century before you get my consent.
You can have your way with my sister—all of them, if you please.
It bothers me not. Take all the Buchanans, too, while you’re at it.
Or maybe just the ones you haven’t already bedded.
We always knew this marriage was in name only, and so it is.
Now please leave me. Attend to the servants yourself if you’re so concerned about the manor’s upkeep. Gather your own vegetables.”
With that, I tried to turn from him. But he, very gently, held me in place. One of his palms curled over my shoulder, pinning me down and causing my unbuttoned gown to part farther.
I was astounded, after my tirade, to see that he wasn’t angry. Nor bitter or vengeful. He was concerned. And unfathomably luminous, in this muted afternoon light.
For a long time, he said nothing, allowing me to seethe and finally to calm, smoothing my hair all the while with his careful fingers.
“If you find her more pleasing, husband, I give you my blessing. You should have chosen her sooner, if that’s what you wanted all along.”
The now-familiar lurk of beguiled amusement shone in his eyes, and a quirk of a smile played at the corner of his mouth. “If I didn’t know better of my enchanting, impassioned little wife, I’d almost say you were jealous.” He looked more than a little pleased by this.
“You’d be wrong,” I replied, indignant.
His half-cocked grin, I’ll admit, made him look ridiculously handsome. But I no longer cared about his handsomeness, I reminded myself. In fact, I never had. Or the potent vigor that clung to him like a glimmering sheen.
“I wouldn’t be jealous if you sowed your seed across all the Highlands,” I told him. “I simply don’t care.”
“Is that so?” he asked softly. Still holding me down, Kade moved over me, straddling my hips.
Sitting as he was, I could feel the rock-hard pressure of him in a most intimate place, and the contact was maddeningly rife with sensation.
He rocked against me in a shrewd, barely there movement that caused a vibrant hum within me.
With a gentleness that belied his obvious insensitivity, he drew the gaping neckline of my dress lower over the tops of my breasts, so that my nipples were barely covered.
His fingertips moved across my skin with a slow reverence.
He watched me with an awed expression. I made no move to struggle against him.
Let him feel my total indifference to him, I thought.
Let him know that nothing he could do would touch me, not really.
He might touch my body, but never my soul.
Never me. I willed my body not to rise to his command.
My body, however, had a mind of its own and was conducting a mutiny against all my attempts at resistance.
My nipples were beading under the near caress of his fingers.
I was growing soft and wet where his hardness dug against me.
“Be assured of this—I didn’t touch your sister,” he said, his bright, aqua eyes still focused on the pale curves of my breasts. His thumbs slid under the velvet of my dress to brush against the distended tips, sending a charged pleasure rush to my deepest depths. “She came to deliver a message.”
“A ‘message’!” I scoffed, squirming under his body like a fish on a hook.
To escape him, aye. To distance myself. “I’m sure I know exactly what her message was.
” Of her availability, if I was ever unwilling.
Of how much Kade reminded her of his brother.
Of her expertise, in the wake of my reticence and my awkward inexperience.