12. Chapter 12 #2
I leaned forward, hovering over him, his blue eyes glazed over and his mouth slack as he heaved breaths. “So good,” he panted.
“I’ve marked you.”
He grinned languidly, his eyes still closed. “You sure did.”
“And you’ve marked me.”
“We are one, then.”
“Yes. One day we’ll unite by blood.”
His eyes popped open, and his brows rose. “Ah… not sure if I can deal with that kind of pain.”
“I have two family members who are united by blood. That’s what I want. I won’t hurt you. Not like what they do to each other. Something small.”
“O-okay. If that’s what you want.”
“Don’t you?”
He smiled sleepily. “I would love to unite with you.”
Thomas then reached for my face, gently placing his hand on my cheek. “I would love to unite with you because I love you. Is it too soon to say that? It’s too soon.” He bit his bottom lip with uncertain eyes, waiting for my answer, but he didn’t shy away from me.
“I have no concept of what is too soon or not for love.”
His laugh was self-deprecating. “Yeah, me neither. I’ve never been in love before.”
“Good. I want to be the only one ever. But while I understand the concept of love, I can’t feel it, Thomas. ”
His brows furrowed, and he frowned, which I didn’t like. “What do you mean?”
“I’m incapable of feeling such things.”
Thomas thought about my words in silence as his hand trailed along my face, down my throat, and along my shoulder. “Hmm, I don’t agree. Maybe you don’t understand entirely what it feels like, but you express it all the time. There are many ways to love.”
“Luca said something similar.”
“Luca? Who the hell is Luca?”
I grinned at his jealousy. Now he understood that inner rage. “Another family member. But explain how I express it.”
“Phew, I was about to get all pissy because you said you’ve never been with anyone else.”
I kissed the tip of his nose. “I do enjoy your jealousy.”
He looked up at me with wide blue eyes, but they weren’t just wide.
Thomas was giving me a look that was more than worship.
Was that love? Was that how it looked? His hands roved across my chest and over my arms. “To answer your question, you take such good care of me, and you protect me, like you would hurt anyone who harmed me. Not only that, but you need me and want to be around me all the time.”
“Because you give me things, and I feed off your desire for me. You also meet all my needs. That’s all.”
He huffed a laugh. “Isn’t that what love is? It’s about give and take. I take from you. You take from me. We both give back to each other to keep those transactions going, right?”
“I suppose… ”
“I get what you’re saying. We haven’t known each other for long, but I’ve learned that you’re different.
You think differently, behave differently, talk differently…
Why wouldn’t you love differently? Those things, especially, were what drew me to you; that, and your straightforwardness.
Maybe you don’t feel the same way I do, but I think you like me and want to be around me. ”
“I do. You’re right about one thing.”
“What’s that?”
“I would hurt anyone who ever harmed you. They would pay dearly.”
His smile was sweet and tender, his eyes filled with adoration. “See? If that’s not love, I don’t know what is.”
“The one thing that pleases me most is that I have your love. That means I have all of you… heart, soul, and mind. It’s mine to covet.”
“Definitely… all of me, Superman.”
I leaned down to kiss him quickly before helping him up. “You look tired, so you need your rest.”
I led him back to my bedroom, both of us still naked. “Do you need to shower?”
“Do I have to have one?” he yawned, swaying where he stood.
“No.”
“Sorry, I get up so early, so I get tired early.”
I said nothing as we slid under the cool sheets. When I held out my arm, he curled into me, resting a hand on my chest and a leg over my thigh. My arm wrapped around him as I watched him doze off, his fingers twitching on my chest.
Was he right about love? Maybe I’d gotten it all wrong. Between what he explained and how Luca explained it, maybe there were different forms of love. I still couldn’t feel it, not like others could. Before, I hadn’t cared. Now I did.
I had a surprise for him, but since he was already out, it could wait for the morning.
“No time for coffee,” I said.
“But…”
“After.”
I led him by the hand and took the elevator down to the underground parking.
Thomas yawned loudly. “It’s too early not to have coffee. And I’m still in my PJs. I can’t work like this.”
“Quiet. We’ll go back up in a minute. I meant to show you this last night.”
We stopped in front of the BMW I bought for him.
“It’s a BMW 3-Series in Arctic Blue.”
“Wow, this is so beautiful, East. Did you just buy it?”
“Yes, it’s yours.”
His jaw dropped to the ground, mid-yawn. “W-what? Y-you bought me a… car?” he squeaked, looking more awake now.
“Yes, of course.”
“Of course?” He snorted a laugh and rubbed his eyes with his fists.
“You have no car. Your dad sold his. I don’t like you having to take the subway or bus. It’s not safe.”
Thomas turned to face me and rested his hands on my chest. “See, that’s love. You care about my well-being. ”
“Yes, for me.”
“So you can keep me. Yes. Thank you. I love the car, but…”
“Say it,” I snapped, instantly tensing. I didn’t like ‘ buts .’
“The neighborhood I live in? Cars like these either get vandalized or stolen. Or my dad will find a way to sell it. I can’t keep it, Superman. You’ll just waste your money and ruin a perfectly beautiful car.”
“Then I’ll get you a new house in a new neighborhood.”
A giggle rose in his throat before it became a full-on laugh. He then rested his head on my shoulder, shaking against me from the laughter. “God, East… You’re so amazing and sweet. As much as I love you, I can’t accept a house, either. That’s too much.”
“Is it?”
“Yes.”
“Then I’ll keep the car here until we can live together.”
He held me tighter. “You’re really spoiling me, but I love you just as you are.”
“Then you can spoil me by worshiping me just as you always do.”
“I think that’s a great plan.”