27. Chapter 27
The house we were staying in was so much nicer than the place Annie and I lived with Dad.
Heck, it was nicer than any hotel I’ve stayed in.
The District made sure we had clothes, toiletries, and enough food to last us a week.
It was hard to be afraid of them or hate them for what they did when they took such good care of Annie and me.
I had to stop being so na?ve. The idea that there were people out there like Easton, casting judgment on others, was terrifying.
It was really scary. But it was hard to feel sorry for people like those who helped my father stay addicted and who stole his children.
Who knew what would have happened to us had I not met Easton?
It was strangely easy to forgive. Although I wasn’t sure I would’ve thought the same had I been on the outside of it all .
There was no leaving Easton. I loved him with all my heart. He would always protect Annie and me. He also deserved to be loved.
It was the next morning after our time in hell. Maybe being five minutes to noon didn’t count as morning. We both slept in, making up for the lack of sleep over the past few days. Annie and I were sitting at the kitchen table, eating oatmeal, while I was drinking pretty good coffee.
“What are we going to do, Tommy?” Annie asked quietly, dragging her spoon through the thick goop of oats. “What are we going to do about Dad, our living situation, school… Everything’s changed.”
“It has.” I was now her father figure at nineteen. I guess I always had been since Mom died. So, I had to have the answers for her. I just didn’t know if she was ready to hear them.
“This is all Dad’s fault. He’s such a fucking loser! How could he let them do that to his own kids?”
I sighed, tipped back the mug, and finished my coffee. I stood and poured some more from the pot, adding cream and sugar to taste. “It’s not all his fault. Those people pushed him for their own nefarious reasons. It’s what they do.”
“They told you that?”
“Yeah, they help push the addiction so they can manipulate their desperation. Dad was their victim as much as we were, but you’re right. He made a choice to start gambling in the first place. In the end, he needs help, and I’m not going to leave him behind.”
“Ugh! Why? He doesn’t deserve us! Fuck him! It’s just you and me now. ”
I sat down next to her and took her hand in mine. “Annie, I understand the anger. I really do. I’m angry, too. What we went through… the mental torture they put me through… But if we leave him, he’ll die.”
“Good!”
“Annie, you don’t mean that,” I sighed. “He needs help, not abandonment. I’m not saying we move back home and live as if none of this happened, but I’m not going to turn my back on him.
If you never want to see him again, that’s your choice.
I’ll take care of you. But we lost one parent, and I’m not ready to lose another.
I know, deep down, he loves us. He would never want us hurt. ”
She pulled away and shoved her bowl back. “Whatever. I’m done with him.”
“That’s up to you, Annie Boo.”
She put her face into her hands and sighed. “What about Easton? He’s a… they’re all killers, Tommy.”
“I know. Did they tell you about who they are?”
She shook her head. “No, but I’m glad those people are dead.”
That hurt my heart because she was still so young to be so hardened.
We really needed help, but I wasn’t sure how to get it without revealing what happened during our rescue.
There would be nothing on the news about it, and no police records of our escape other than the women strangely found in a house after being trafficked.
“They kill the bad guys,” I said. “They kill those who slip through the judicial cracks. They’re a secret organization that takes out sex traffickers, arms dealers, and leaders of organized crime.
They kill those who hurt others. The kind man with the dark hair and brown eyes, Dalton? He used to be an FBI agent.”
She looked at me with earnest blue eyes that begged me to be telling the truth. “So... they’re good guys?”
“No, Annie. They’re vigilantes, which is a crime, but… I don’t blame them for what they do, either. We’re alive because of them… because of Easton.”
“So, you’re going to keep dating him?”
I tucked some stray blonde strands behind her ear. “Yeah, I love him, and he loves me. We’re bound together. How does that make you feel?”
She shrugged. “Strangely safe.”
I smiled and kissed her head. “Me, too. But I just… need to process things. I need to be away from Easton for a while. I feel safe, but at the same time, I feel like I have to get to know him all over again. I’m not sure how to deal with the fact that my boyfriend…
murders people, to put it bluntly. Jesus… I murdered someone.”
That shit still sat heavily in my chest.
Annie wrapped her spindly arms around my neck and hugged me. “It was self-defense, Tommy. He would have killed us. He’s the one who hurt you. You said so yourself.”
“Taking a life is… horrible, Annie Boo. It doesn’t matter who it is.
But Easton and his… co-workers? Jesus… not that.
Partners? They killed so effortlessly. And Sully?
” I stopped there. She hadn’t seen what I had.
All that blood… “Anyway, we’ll get through this, okay?
I’ll always watch over you. That’s a promise. ”
“And I’ll watch over you.”
I smiled sadly. “I’ll hold you to that.”
“I love you, Tommy. ”
“I love you, too.”
A knock on the door startled us apart.
“Who’s that?” she asked.
“I have no idea. Go to your room and lock the door. I’ll check who it is.”
Annie left without argument. When her door was shut, I headed to the front door and looked out the peephole to find Sid smiling and standing there, wiggling his fingers at me, as if he could see me.
I turned the three bolts on the door and slid the chain back before opening the door to let Sid in.
“Hi,” I said.
“Tommy. Are you and your sister comfortable?”
“Yeah, thanks.”
He carried a brown paper bag with him straight into the kitchen, and I followed him. He set the bag on the counter and pulled out glass containers full of meals. “Dalton insisted on making you and Annie some home-cooked meals. He was slaving away all morning. He’s such a dad…”
“Wow, that’s so nice of him. Thanks.”
“You’re welcome.”
Sid put four containers in the refrigerator and the rest in the freezer.
“H-how’s Easton?” I asked.
“Agitated, annoyed, and wouldn’t stop pacing, so Malik and I sent him on a job to get him focused. He was parked out front all night and morning, watching over you.”
“God, I feel so bad. I didn’t mean to hurt him.”
Sid turned, leaned against the counter, and smiled kindly. “I know. Deep down, he knows that, too, but as you’re aware, he doesn’t process things the same way you or I do.”
“Yeah…”
“I offered to bring the meals because I wanted to talk to you about Easton.”
“I’m not leaving him if you’re here to convince me to stay.”
Sid chuckled and pointed at the coffeepot. “May I?”
“Yeah, of course.”
He pulled a mug from the cabinet and poured himself a cup without sugar and cream.
With his mug in hand, he sat at the kitchen table. “Sit, Thomas. Please.”
I sat across from him, my hands under my thighs so he couldn’t see my hands shaking, but his intelligent blue eyes would probably notice, anyway. Killers were intuitive, right? More than I was.
“Even after what you learned last night, you’re going to continue to pursue things with Easton?”
“Yes, but…”
“You’re nervous around him.”
I shrugged and nodded. “A little. Not just around him, but all of you.”
“That’s a reasonable and normal reaction.
You’re not the first who’s… not a killer to learn about what we do.
My own husband has very high morals. You may wonder what led an FBI agent to join our team.
Our government betrayed him. You can’t prosecute those who do the prosecuting, it seems. So many men and women get away with crimes you couldn’t even im agine.
As Dante likes to say, it takes darkness to kill the darkness.
My own uncle, who was my guardian, did horrible things to me, and I was helpless until I took things into my own hands. ”
“Y-you killed him?”
“I did. Ever since the death of my parents, I’ve been surrounded by criminals. Malik, Sully, Dante, Maverick, Khai, Easton… They were all forced into a world they didn’t want to be in. Sully is one of the few who truly embraces who he is, but he’s also a psychopath.”
All I could focus on was Easton. “Yeah, his parents were really bad, he said.”
“Did Easton tell you how? Or what happened?”
I shook my head. “He just said they hurt him and were dead. That he was glad of it. Sid… why are you here?”
He tilted his head, nodded, and smiled. “Two things. I need to make sure you don’t turn us in.
It’s vital we retain our anonymity, for obvious reasons.
If anyone who wants us dead knows of your connection to us, they’ll eliminate you.
It’s also for your protection. I don’t want to threaten you, but if it’s between you and us, well… ”
“I-I figured. I swear, I won’t tell anyone. You all saved Annie and me. No way would I hurt you like that. Plus, I love Easton. I couldn’t do that to him, either. He’ll always protect me.”
“With his life, it seems. And that brings me to the second reason I’m here. We talked a little about how Easton is last time, but I don’t think you understand the full scope.”
I swallowed the growing lump in my throat and bounced my knee. “There’s more than being neurodivergent and… what he does for a living, isn’t there? ”
“Yes. It’s not my story to tell, but he has antisocial personality disorder. He hasn’t been clinically diagnosed, but all the… signs are there.”
“That’s sociopathy? I learned that in my psychology class. That’s what he has? God… poor Easton.”
Sid suddenly laughed. “Well, yes, poor because he was made that way. But I’m not sure he feels bad about who and what he is.
For him, he just is, and he likes who he is.
Easton doesn’t care because he can’t. It’s not his being on the spectrum that inhibits his empathy.
Neurodivergent people are quite capable of empathy, and some even have heightened empathy.
It’s his ASPD that keeps him from that.”
“I… This leaves me more to think about.”
“It does. If you choose to stay with him, life won’t be easy. Easton can be… difficult sometimes. You have to know how to redirect him and get him to focus. Most of the time, he’s steady and centered. But there are times he can fly off the handle without a moment’s notice.”
God, I studied the behavior, but I hadn’t even recognized it in Easton.
“It’s not Easton’s fault.”
“Of course not,” I said.
“Regardless, Easton is really taken with you. He listens to you because he trusts you. You give him all that he craves, and he’s been very lonely for a long time. You’ve filled his void and have made him happy. He’ll literally do anything for you.”
My eyes watered, not only because of the news I’d just received, but because Sid was telling me how Easton still felt about me, and the guilt gnawed at me for needing to be alone to think about things.
Despite it all, I was still a little afraid of him, and a little bit more so, since I learned he had ASPD.
“I’m concerned that if you end things, he won’t…”
“He won’t just let me go,” I finished for him.
“Yes. I reiterate what I said before. He cannot love you back.”
“But I still love him, Sid. So much. He’s amazing in so many ways. And I disagree that he can’t love me back. He does… in his own way. I was reminded of that last night.”
Sid tilted his head and smirked curiously. “How so?”
“Strangely, it was from watching Sully and Malik. When you told he was a psychopath, the memory just clicked for me. Last night, after Sully was wounded, Malik had scolded him, but it soon turned to affection. I saw it in their eyes. Sully loves him, too… that sweet kiss he gave Malik. I am sure he also expressed it in his own way. Easton is everything. One thing about him that he’ll never do is lie to me.
I’ve talked about this before, but I will always know where I stand with him.
He knows how much I crave that and gives it to me.
His taking care of me and meeting my needs is his love language. He doesn’t have to. He chooses to.”
“He does it to keep you to meet his own needs.”
“I understand that. But this goes back to the same argument I’ve made.
Love is about give and take. He meets my needs, and I meet his.
I don’t need declarations of love, flowers, or date nights.
I love what he gives me and how he gives it to me.
It’s more than those superficial things.
At the end of it, he does it to keep me. In other words, he wants me.”
“Fair enough. ”
“But I’m not going to lie. All that death scared me. I’m also struggling with killing someone… like a lot. I never want to go through that again. I guess therapy is out of the question, huh?”
Sid shrugged. “It’s not the best idea, but I empathize with you.
I really do. Let me talk to Malik. Perhaps we can find someone we trust to speak with you and Annie.
Luca needed help at the time, and we never gave it to him for the same reasons, but he also never asked for it, seemingly content with what Dante offered. ”
“Thanks. I’m just a little messed up in the head about all this. I just need some time.”
Sid stood, finished his coffee, and put the mug in the dishwasher.
“Well, we’ll keep Easton preoccupied until you’re ready to talk to him.
And, of course, you can always talk to Dalton or Luca, who are empathetic to you.
I am, too, but I’m family first. They can be a really good ear if you need it. ”
“Thanks.”
He turned around and patted his jacket. “Oh, I almost forgot. Here.” Sid handed me a box, and I opened it to find a new smartphone. “It’s already set up for you, connected to the Wi-Fi here, and Easton’s number is programmed in it.”
I smiled at that.
“Well, I’m off. And if you need anything, Dalton and my numbers are also on the list of contacts.”
“Thank you, Sid.”
He gently grabbed my shoulder. “You’re welcome, kid. And welcome to the family.”
Family ? I supposed I was a part of it now.