Chapter 17
ISLA
Old habits die hard. I could’ve taken an hour-long shower. Instead, I scrubbed my body and washed my hair in sixty seconds as if Pippa was in her crib waiting for me. After drying my body, I pulled on a tank top and bikini underwear.
As I towel-dried my short hair, I thought about my baby girl.
This was the second time in a week that I left her to spend the night with Alba.
It’d been six days since I saw Ciro, and I had to admit, I was shocked he hadn’t called or showed up at my work.
But I wasn’t complaining. I just wanted to get back to living my life and stop looking over my shoulder, expecting him to jump out of the shadows and surprise me.
Of course, I thought about Ciro every day, and prayed Alessio was okay. Part of me wanted to reach out to Rosa, Ciro’s sister, to find out if Alessio was okay.
But did I really want to open that can of worms? She’d question me about what I’d been up to and would probably tell Ciro I called. Loyalty ran deep in the Remotti family, and I’d always been on the outside, thanks to Ciro for never allowing me into the fold.
Because of seeing him, my emotions were out of control. I’d hardly slept a wink since the night at the Irish pub, which was why Alba had suggested she keep Pippa tonight. There was no denying I needed a decent night’s sleep to function at work and for my baby girl.
A yawn took hold of me and I was about to collapse on my bed when a knock at my front door made me freeze.
I wasn’t expecting any visitors after ten o’clock at night. It was probably my sister, Elsie. Her boyfriend was a loser and habitually drunk. She might need my help and a safe place to crash for the night while he slept off his raging intoxication.
Although, I didn’t recall hearing them arguing when I passed their apartment half an hour ago. Those two were a thorn in my side that I wished would move away so I could live a peaceful life, just me and my Pippa.
Stomping down the hallway, I hated feeling obligated to help my sister when she wouldn’t do the same for me. If it were me needing help with anything, she’d make up an excuse as to why she couldn’t help.
I swung open the door without looking through the peephole. Big mistake because it wasn’t Elsie…
“Ciro,” I said on a gasp. His narrow brown eyes and stoic expression sent a chill down my spine. Every cell in my body told me that he knew about Pippa.
He pushed his way into my home and forced me to step back and he closed the door.
“Is that how you answer the door? Don’t you think that’s just asking for trouble?
” He raked his glacial eyes over my body.
It was then I realized I hadn’t put on a robe before answering the door.
I was only wearing a tank and underwear.
“I thought… I thought you were someone else.”
“Who? Your boyfriend?” he hissed, his jaw twitching as if he was trying to maintain control.
“No. My sister. Not that it’s any of your business. She sometimes needs help if her boyfriend’s drunk.” Why did I tell him that my sister was my neighbor?
He stepped toward me, and I backed up. He was emitting an aura of rage with his face screwed up and hands fisted.
“Go put something decent on,” he hissed through clenched teeth.
I spun around and left the living room. But why was I obeying his orders? It was my damn home, but I should have clothes on. Answering the door half naked wasn’t smart. My apartment building was full of men with questionable character.
I threw on joggers and an oversized tee, then brushed my fingers through my bangs. As I peeked at my appearance in the mirror, I drew in a deep breath and blew it out.
After Ciro and I parted ways at the pub, I’d thought about what I might say if I ever saw him again. I’d come up with several versions about why I’d kept Pippa from him. But they all ended with me begging for forgiveness, which I hated.
But with him in my home, my mind was blank. I couldn’t remember what I’d planned to say with my heart racing a mile a minute.
I returned to the front room, preparing for the fight of my life. The sight of Ciro cemented me in place. He was staring at a picture of Pippa on the wall and holding her stuffed lamb.
“Ciro.” I swallowed hard as my hand pressed against my chest, fearing what he might do to me.
He whirled around, his eyes wet, wild, and raging. “Where is she?”
“She’s not here,” I blurted in a panicked voice.
“Don’t play games with me. Where’s my daughter?” He stormed past me and went to my room.
It was the only room, besides the bathroom. A one-bedroom apartment was all I could afford, but I didn’t need more. Pippa slept with me most nights anyway.
Still, she had a crib. That was where Ciro was as I crept into my room. He was gripping the railing of her empty bed.
“I told you, she isn’t here.” I kept my voice soft to avoid upsetting him more. Oh God, this was bad. How did he find out?
He startled me, turning around and grabbing my shoulders. He shook me hard as he yelled, “You haven’t denied it. Where is my daughter? Where is she?”
I couldn’t stop the tears from falling. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” Had I known he would react like a man who wanted his child, I would’ve told him, even after seeing him with someone else. But here we were and for the life of me, I didn’t know how to reply.
Ciro instantly stopped shaking me. He pressed his forehead against mine and his nails into my flesh. “Where is she?” he repeated through gritted teeth. “I know she’s mine.”
“With the babysitter. My friend, Alba.”
“Is that where you went after work last Friday?”
“Oh my God, you followed me to her house.” I jerked out of his grasp and moved away from him. Of course he’d followed me to Alba’s. How could I have been so stupid to think the gas station was where he’d found me?
“Yes.” Ciro inhaled a ragged breath, taking in the small room. “Why did you leave her there?”
I walked out of the room, hoping he’d follow me and he did.
I didn’t want him in my bedroom. Just seeing him again wreaked havoc on my defenses all over again.
I needed to be strong and keep my wits about me.
But damn him, he looked good, and his unique scent mixed with his intoxicating cologne heated my core.
I stood near the door and wrapped my arms around my stomach. Ciro paced in front of me like a lion readying to pounce on its prey. He still had Pippa’s lamb in his hand.
My God, I felt like a cruel, malicious bitch.
Ciro had all the power and money to take Pippa away from me. The last thing I wanted was to get on his bad side. I needed to stay calm and keep him calm. Appease him until I figured out my next move.
“Why didn’t you call me? You left the night of the party and took your little secret with you.”
“No,” I shot back defensively. “That’s not how it was.”
“Then tell me how it was.” He squared his shoulders, and I did the same.
“I didn’t find out I was pregnant until four weeks later. I was stunned. I mean, I religiously took my birth control pills, so I needed a few days to process. I was going to tell you.”
“You’re lying.” He shook his head incredulously.
“I planned to tell you, but you rebounded so quickly after me.” Emotion lodged in my throat as I dried my face with my sweatshirt sleeve.
“I did not rebound after you.” He glared at me. “If I had, I wouldn’t be here now!”
“Oh, really?” I laughed mockingly. “Then who was the redhead in a gold bikini straddling you by the pool?”
Ciro stiffened and took a step back. “What?”
“Yeah, that’s right. I saw you.” My voice dripped with disgust. “After I took the pregnancy test, I heard you were back in LA and went to your estate. I saw you.” I pointed at him.
“Let me explain.”
“No! You hear me out.”
“Continue.” He placed his hands on his hips and appeared docile for the first time since I met him.
“You were both by the pool. She was laughing, tossing her head back, while straddling you. She ground on you like you were fucking, but I couldn’t tell for sure.
All of Southern California could hear her moaning.
” A sob broke from my throat. I couldn’t stop the tears from falling as I remembered the moment that made me vow to never see him again.
To avoid bumping into Ciro when he was in LA, I’d dropped out of school and moved to the Bay Area.
“It’s not what you think,” he said, his voice low and laced with shame.
“Bullshit! It was exactly what I saw. Tell me you didn’t have sex with her right there on the patio.”
Ciro stared at me, his chest heaving. “Isla—”
“Tell me, Ciro! Tell me I had it all wrong,” I whimpered, my heart breaking all over again. “Tell me it was a misunderstanding. That I didn’t see you about to have sex with that goddamn redhead. Tell me…”
“Isla—”
“No.” I cut him off, shaking my head. “It doesn’t matter now. Since then, there’ve been other women in your life. My social media accounts keep me updated on your latest girlfriend.”
“Jesus, you know you can’t believe what you see online. You have it all fucking wrong!”
“I don’t care. I. Don’t. Care.” I breathed deeply, trying to calm my racing heart. I was so hurt and angry, tremors rolled through my limbs. “Nothing matters now, just Pippa.”
“Pippa?” The hard lines on his face softened and the tension radiating off him calmed, a little.
“Yes. I call her Pippa,” I snapped at him as my tension was building the more, we talked about my baby girl. “I won’t let you hurt her or break her heart.”
“I would never.” He tried to pull me into his arms, but I jerked away hard.
“Don’t touch me. Where’s your redhead? I’m sure she’ll flip when you tell her you have a kid with your ex.” I wouldn’t let him destroy my baby girl the way my dad had destroyed me.
“She’s not my woman,” he said through gritted teeth, his nostrils flaring. “If you’d just—”
“Oh, that’s nice. She’s just good for a quick fuck by the pool, huh?” I laughed through my tears as the image of them together assaulted me all over again. “Seems she and I have a lot more in common than I realized.”
Ciro grabbed ahold of my arms. “Don’t you compare yourself to her!”
I gasped, ripping myself out of his hands. “Oh, I see. You’re in love with her. Well, I’m happy for both of you.” I went to open the door. “Please leave.”
“You have it wrong, Isla.” He rubbed his temples and ignored my request for him to leave.
“You keep saying that, but I’m sure I don’t. I’m glad you found someone. I always knew when the right woman came along, she’d be everything to you. Now, I want you to leave.” How many times did I have to ask him to leave?
“I’m not going anywhere.” The stubborn jerk wouldn’t budge. “We’re going to fucking talk this out. Right here. Right now.”
“Look at me. I’m exhausted.” I wiped away the tears on my face. “I worked a double shift today. It’s not easy being a single mom. I’m doing the best I can.” A sob ripped from my chest.
“Shh, don’t cry,” he whispered.
“I’m doing the best I can to give my baby everything she needs and deserves. Please… Just leave. We can figure this out tomorrow.” It was very late and I wasn’t mentally clear. Now that he knew about Pippa, there was a lot for us to figure out… tomorrow.
“I already said I’m not going anywhere.” Ciro closed the door and bolted it.
Before I could protest, he swept me off my feet and carried me toward my bedroom.
“What are you doing?” I wiggled in his arms to be set free, but it was useless, because he was bigger and stronger than me.
“I’m taking you to your room.”
“Are you insane? I’m not having sex with you.”
“Sex is the first thing that popped into your head.” He chuckled and the sound of his amusement melted me. Not to mention how wonderful it felt being in his arms and smelling his cologne. “I like that, but no.”
“Good, because I’d never willingly have sex with you.” I was ashamed of myself for being disappointed. But if he had found his person and loved her, I would never try to get him to cheat on her.
“Yes, you would, My-la.” He laid me in bed, pulled the covers up to my neck the way I liked, and stared at me with sad eyes.
“God you’re incorrigible.” I tucked the blanks under my chin and held on to them tightly so he couldn’t see my body. It was silly, considering he’d thoroughly discovered my body hundreds of times.
“You have it all wrong about the redhead and what you saw online.”
“Whatever,” I murmured. “Just get out of my apartment.”
“I’m not leaving. I’ll sleep on the couch so we can talk in the morning.” He stared down at me. I knew the look. There was no changing his mind. “I’m fucking pissed at you for not telling me about Pippa.”
I had no words as his piercing dark eyes appeared angry and sad simultaneously.
“I like her nickname.” He smiled softly and ran the pad of his thumb down my jawline. “Christ, I’m so hurt you didn’t tell me about her. But we’ll discuss it more tomorrow. I want to see her first thing in the morning.”
“I have to be at work at one.”
“Call in. Or better yet just quit. You don’t need a job that takes you away from our daughter all damned day.” He scanned the room. “And it doesn’t pay you enough to live in a decent place.”
Our daughter. My mind was reeling hearing him call her our daughter.
“Not everyone is a billionaire. I’m providing for her. She’s never gone without anything! She’s happy. Healthy. I did that. I—”
“Shh.” He put two fingers on my lips to silence me. “Let’s not do this now. You get some sleep.” He went to the door, turned out the lights, and closed it.
If I wasn’t so exhausted, I would have argued. But I was emotionally drained, too. Sleep would take me quickly.
But before it did, I prayed Ciro wouldn’t take my baby from me. Nothing would destroy me more than losing my lovebug.