Chapter Nine
Caroline
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I WATCHED THE DOOR as it closed behind Claude, leaving the two of us alone in what our host had called the ‘viewing room’.
Harper’s deposit box had been brought from the appropriate vault and placed on the table for him to open, but to the word ‘room’ didn’t do the gigantic place justice.
Its scale and décor were incredible for a space so few people would see, but after our journey through the labyrinth of vaults, I was hardly surprised.
The technology keeping those deposit boxes safe was like something out of a science fiction novel, the high-end security reminding me of a futuristic crypt.
“This is it.” Harper’s excited tone captured my attention, and I watched as he walked the short distance to the clean, white table, where his box was waiting.
In my head, he was still ‘Harper’, the commander general who’d wielded such terror and temptation at the camp I’d been held in. Yet, simultaneously, he’d become Adam, the man who’d loved, pleasured, and protected me.
The man who’d saved me.
In truth, he was both men; the tender lover and the callous tyrant.
And even though one of those roles had recently become redundant, the way he embodied both with comparative ease was still a headfuck.
How could a man who’d locked up so many innocent women have been prepared to sacrifice everything for a woman he scarcely knew?
A part of me still didn’t understand the leap of faith he’d taken.
“So, this is where everyone views their boxes, Sir?”
I glanced around, not sure if I was impressed or disgusted.
I’d known Harper was a significant man in the alleged new regime, but I’d never appreciated the extent of his personal wealth.
The kind of money it must have taken to keep possessions in the vault of a bank like the one we were standing in then was probably more than I was ever likely to see in my whole life.
“That’s right.” He slotted the key Claude had given him into the lock.
“You could do anything in a place like this.” I heard the awe in my voice as my gaze scanned the sumptuous space. “In fact, this is about the same size as the downstairs of the house I used to own.”
Before the state impounded it as its own.
“I’m pleased you like it.” He wasn’t paying attention to me, not anymore.
For the first time since we fled Fortorus, something other than my wellbeing had commanded his focus, and collapsing onto one of the fancy chairs positioned around the room, I concentrated on the box that held such fascination for him.
He’d mentioned that there was foreign currency inside, but what else he’d reveal, I had no way of knowing.
My gaze darted to the bag he’d left by the entrance.
Everything else we owned in the world was in there, and none of those possessions were mine.
In the frenzy of getting away from an authoritarian state, I’d forgotten just how penniless I truly was.
“It’s all here.” He sounded relieved, though I didn’t understand why. Surely, he paid the bank a fortune to ensure that everything was precisely where he’d left it.
“What are you looking for, Sir?” I considered getting up to look for myself, but an odd sense of propriety kept me rooted to my seat.
Whatever was in that box was his property, and the fact that he’d run away with me didn’t make any of it mine.
I paused at that, the idea resonating again. I had nothing. No money, no property, and no possessions. Hell, even the friends I’d had were either dead or on the run in the country I’d once called home. Staring at the man I loved, I realized abruptly just how dependent I was on him.
The expression ‘he was my everything’ was not usually so literal.
“The contents of this box is our future, little girl.” He spun on his heel, and for the first time, I could see the relief etched into his handsome features, the brow that had once been furrowed finally permitted to relax.
“Your future,” I corrected, still perturbed by the realization that I had nothing.
How could I have been so na?ve?
Yes, I’d been desperate to get out of Britain, and I’d needed Harper’s help to accomplish that, but how had I thought I’d survive once we’d crossed the border?
I couldn’t just expect the man who used to reign over my misery to be my savior forever.
I wasn’t living in a fairy tale. Christ, hadn’t Fortorus well and truly taught me that lesson?
Staring at the black deposit box, it was all so clear. The lust Harper and I shared had been my ticket out of hell, but I’d been an idiot to expect it to mean more.
“I mean, nothing in there is mine.” My voice sounded distant, as though it was coming from somewhere else in the room.
“Where’s this coming from?” He frowned, and leaving the box, he wandered toward me. “You know I’ll take care of you, Caroline.”
He was right by my chair then, towering over me in that way he’d done so many times before, but in the haze of my new awareness, I couldn’t find the will to lift my chin and meet his demanding gaze.
“I know you love me now, Sir.” Tears burned in my eyes, but I blinked them away angrily. Crying wasn’t going to fucking help me. “And I love you, too, but I can’t expect you to just pay for everything from now on. That’s not how this works.”
He lowered to crouch in front of me, reaching for my trembling hand. “Hey.”
I tried to swallow back my rising emotion, but the abrupt recognition of my plight had washed over me like a tsunami. I’d swapped servitude for destitution, and the weight of my predicament seemed impossible to hold back.
“I’m just saying, it’s not your responsibility.” I choked out the words, my voice breaking over the final syllables.
“Caroline.” His tone was harder, much more like the man in uniform I remembered, and instinctively, I glanced up, my body straightening as if standing to attention.
“I’m taking care of you because I love you.
” His tone was softer then, and slower too, as though he wanted to make sure I heard and understood every word.
“But if you want to talk about responsibility, I’m sure as hell culpable. ”
“No.” I sniffed back my tears. “You got me out of there. I can’t ask for anymore.”
“Then don’t ask.” He edged closer, pushing between the leggings he’d managed to find for me from somewhere in the camp. I dreaded to think where the clothing had come from, but I was still grateful for the clean change of attire. In that moment, it was all I had. “Just be willing to receive.”
Looking into his big, blue eyes, I couldn’t believe he meant what he said.
Couldn’t he see that his proposal was impossible?
Even before I’d spent the last year being told I was worthless, I’d have never felt comfortable with the type of wealth he clearly had.
I hadn’t done anything to deserve it, and it sure as hell wasn’t mine.
“I can’t take all of this.” My focus flitted around the fancy vault. “It’s not who I am, Sir.”
Or who I was.
“You’ll do as you’re told.” He smirked at me, the order I’d heard so many times before easing some of the tension that had built up in my throat.
“Sir.” My voice was croaky. “You don’t understand.”
“I know I was instrumental in the propagated bullshit that helped you to believe you don’t deserve a decent future, and I’m going to regret that for the rest of my life, little girl.
” He pulled in a sharp breath. “Please, let me at least take care of you until you’re on your feet.
I’m sure you can go back to writing and earning your own money in the future if you choose to. ”
Back to writing?
I blinked at him as though he was insane.
The last time I’d written anything, it had been more of the populist bullshit he was referring to, at his orders, no less.
I couldn’t imagine ever going back to penning fiction again.
The version of me who’d enjoyed that seemed like she was from another time, and I supposed she was—the world before Fortorus.
“I know this is a lot.” His almost flawless brow creased again. “And I know I’m the cause.”
“Not you,” I breathed. “All of it.”
While I appreciated his apologies, carrying the cross of his contrition around with us wasn’t going to help. I needed him to be the same strong protector who’d pulled me out of the mire, while still permitting me to be myself. He’d have to deal with his conscience another time.
“I take responsibility for my part.” His insistent stare told me he was deadly serious. “And I will take care of you.”
“Okay.”
I wasn’t especially reassured, but I accepted that there would be no arguing with him. Perhaps that was part of the strong, protector role I lusted after so much. A man who wouldn’t take no for an answer.
“Okay?” He cocked one of his delicious eyebrows at me. “You’ll let me?”
I laughed softly at that. “Let you? You mean, I have a choice?”
“If I haven’t told you already, then let me be clear, little girl. From now on, you’ll always have a choice.”
“But you just told me to do as I was told.” I could hardly keep up.
“Because you enjoy being commanded sometimes.” Those familiar devils were back in his eyes, goading me into ceding and taking the pleasure. I wanted it. I always wanted it. “But in this life, from now on, the choice will always be yours.”
He opened his arms to me, and I slid to my knees unthinkingly to embrace him. I had no idea what the next few hours would bring, let alone the next days or months, but I had to put my faith in him and believe his intentions were honorable.
We’d come through blood and fire to find ourselves in the vaults of that bank. We’d seen and experienced things that neither of us would have believed were possible before the Edict, but clinging onto him, I realized everything was different.
I needed Harper to survive, but more than that, I wanted his love to help me thrive.