Chapter Twenty #4
“Okay, okay. It’s all right.” Why the hell was Eric being so kind? Didn’t he want to strangle me for this? On top of everything else, I was being a burden when he and Brandt could still be focusing on helping Sage. “Keep trying to breathe for me.”
“I am,” I told him, my voice coming out choked and gravelly. “I can’t.”
“Shhh, yes you can. Concentrate on my voice. In for four, out for four, okay? In…”
I gave it another shot, making an awful stuttering sound, somewhere between a rasp and a wheeze, which ended in more ugly sobs.
“Good,” he still said, “can you tell me five things you can hear or smell?”
“W-what?”
“Try to focus on what you can hear and smell,” he repeated, “and tell me five things.”
What good was that going to do for Sage?
“Keep trying to breathe,” he reminded me. “Now focus on what I’m asking.”
I frowned, but did as I was told. “I can hear…a chair squeaking. And rolling.” I was counting that as two things.
“Good,” Eric sounded far too cheerful about that. “What about scent?”
I had to admit breathing was getting easier to manage as I inhaled deeply. The first thing that registered was Beckett’s alpha scent, which was still calming, and I clung to it.
“Alpha,” I answered, the tightness in my chest easing marginally. “And wolf.”
“Excellent. And the fifth thing?”
I took in a deeper breath.
There was something bubbly and sweet in the air.
Something reminiscent of bubblegum, but less cloying.
Sugary and light. Like a— “Unicorn!” I blurted, my eyes flying open with hope…
only for that hope to come crashing down as I registered Micah shuffling into the room and sidling up to his mate.
Brandt leaned into him, and the pair murmured quietly to each other.
Averting my gaze, I blinked away a new lot of tears as shame burned my cheeks and the back of my neck. My heart was still pounding a too-fast staccato beat inside my chest.
“Hey, it’s fine,” Eric said, moving around to crouch in front of my seat. “Dex…”
I swallowed roughly and shook my head. “No. It’s not fine.
” My throat hurt from all the crying and the strained breathing, and my chest still ached, but I ignored it.
At least speaking was getting easier again.
“You should be worrying about Sage, not…whatever the fuck this” —I gestured vaguely over my body, slumped in the office chair— “is. Was. Whatever.”
“This” —he repeated my hand gesture blithely, waving it over me— “is a sign that you’ve been separated from your mates for too long. Combined with the shock of Sage’s condition and worrying about him, we…I…should have seen this coming.”
“You said it yourself: we’re not even bonded.”
“Maybe not, but something exists there.” Eric ran his hand through the mess of blond curls on his head.
“This is why I want to be in the know about these things. Because there are three of you involved, the magic might be working differently. Like creating the framework for a bond before you all complete it, or something. It’s probably trickier between three than just two. ”
I didn’t want to throw Sage under the metaphorical bus and explain that the reticence to tell them all about our situation had come from him, but, selfishly, I didn’t want them to blame me for it, either.
“I didn’t…” I started, my shoulders drooping. “The plan was to say something when Sergio got back. When we had all had a chance to properly talk everything out in person.”
It sounded silly in hindsight. We’d spent six weeks talking about everything and anything via video calls.
We had already had the necessary conversations.
We all already knew that we were beyond compatible together as a threesome.
A throuple. We all already knew that we would bond after Sergio finally settled in Shifters Sanctuary.
We had really just wanted to keep it to ourselves to preserve that feeling of being in our own little bubble.
And look how well that had turned out.
“Yeah, well, I figure Sage had a lot to do with that, right?” Eric huffed, but the question was affectionate, if slightly exasperated.
“He said something about being my latest project…it doesn’t matter.
I’ll talk to you all once everyone is reunited and we can make sure there aren’t any lasting effects from the magic-restricting cell.
That’s what’s most important right now.”
Something of my renewed panic must have shown on my face, because he hurried to add, “His hCG levels are still low, meaning that he’s only very early into his pregnancy, so his body won’t be relying on as much magic right now, okay?
The initial internal shift has already taken place, and his uterus already exists, so the cell he’s in won’t affect any of that. ”
“But…to maintain the internal shift?” I asked, unable to help myself.
Eric grimaced. “That is why we need to get him out of there sooner rather than later. I honestly don’t know if it’s something that does need to be maintained through magic or not. It’s not something we have a way of testing.”
“Not humanely,” I spoke without thinking, my own words making me feel ill as I talked out the realization, “not without putting a pregnant omega in a cage which prevents magic.”
He nodded. “But we’re getting him out, Dex. Come hell or high water.”
Right then, I would have happily summoned both if it meant having Sage back sooner.