Chapter 32
Chapter Thirty-Two
“ J eremy?” Eloise called, her eyes wide.
But her brother didn’t turn, his eyes locked on Felix, who was standing with his arms by his sides—a defensive stance—every line of his body taut.
“YOU!”
Jeremy pushed past the footmen, his face crimson with anger, his thick black curls dangling in his eyes, his hat discarded. He marched straight toward Felix.
“I told you, Jeremy,” Felix said coldly. “When you calm down, we can talk about it. But I will not entertain you until you approach this like a gentleman.”
“My sister? Are you out of your mind?” Jeremy’s voice was thick with fury, his eyes latched on Felix with a heat Eloise hadn’t seen in years.
Her heart raced, desperate with the need to explain everything to him. She was certain he would be grateful, if only he knew what had really happened.
“Jeremy, would you please come inside and have a cup of tea?” she tried.
The footman grasped for him but missed. “Sir, I must implore you to?—”
“Leave him, Jenkins,” Felix said without taking his eyes off Jeremy. “I will deal with it.”
The footman bowed uncertainly then stepped to the side, observing the scene unfold as Eloise watched from the other end of the corridor.
“How dare you take advantage of my sister , of all people?” Jeremy screamed.
“Jeremy, stop this at once!” Eloise stepped forward, but her brother waved her off, his attention fixed solely on Felix. “Please. There is so much more to this than meets the eye.”
She glanced at Felix, hoping he would know how to fix this calamity. His expression remained unreadable, but he took a step forward, his voice calm and low, his stature intimidating.
“I understand you are upset, my friend,” he said, “but you are out of line.”
“Out of line?” Jeremy spat, his fists clenched as he advanced. “I trusted you, Felix! And this is how you repay that trust? By dragging my sister into your life as though she is just another one of your casual pursuits?”
Felix’s jaw tightened, and Eloise could see the storm clouds gathering in his eyes.
“Be very careful with your words, friend,” he warned, his tone still restrained but carrying a sharp edge. “If anyone is insulting your sister here, it is you.”
Jeremy wasn’t listening. He was driven by a rage the likes of which Eloise had never seen in her brother. It was worse than she had feared.
He lunged forward, taking a swing at Felix. Eloise let out a cry as Felix effortlessly sidestepped him, and Jeremy stumbled. In a smooth, practiced movement, Felix grasped Jeremy’s arm and twisted it, pinning it behind him.
“Brother, please, stop this! Let us talk instead.”
“That is enough,” Felix said, his voice low and firm as he held Jeremy in place. He spoke into her brother’s ear. “You do not know what you are talking about.”
Eloise’s eyes darted one way and then the next, not knowing where to turn or whom to protect: her brother or her husband.
“Felix,” Eloise gasped finally, rushing forward to try to calm them both. She placed a hand on Felix’s arm, her voice steady but urgent. “Let him go. Please.”
“Only if he promises to behave,” Felix said, shoving Jeremy lightly. “You know I am the better fighter, Jeremy. You do not want to test me and certainly not in my own home.”
Jeremy struggled as his expression turned into one of reluctant acquiescence.
“Fine,” he snapped.
Felix released him, but his stance remained alert and ready. Eloise joined him, standing together against her brother to whom she looked with pity and sadness.
Jeremy shook out his arm, glaring at Eloise now. “And you, dear sister! Do not think I have forgotten about you! What were you thinking, Eloise?” His voice was laced with disbelief and betrayal. “I leave for a few months, and I come back to find my sister married to the biggest rake in London? How could you let this happen? I always thought you were the more intelligent sibling, but now, I see how foolish I had been.”
“Jeremy, listen to me,” Eloise snapped, her own anger rising as she looked between her brother and Felix. “You do not understand what has happened during your absence. Felix stepped in because we were in profoundly serious trouble. He married me to save us all from ruin.”
“Save you?” Jeremy scoffed, crossing his arms. “It is hardly salvation to marry a man who cannot even keep his own reputation clean. Mother told me everything the moment I arrived: how you were caught up in Father’s debt, the collectors, the rumors… and then I find out about this marriage. Eloise, how could you let him?—”
“Enough!” Eloise’s voice cut through his tirade, and Jeremy paused, taken aback by her fierceness. She felt her heart pounding, anger overtaking her initial shock. “Can you not put aside your pride for one moment and be grateful? Do you have any idea how difficult it was for us while you were gone? Felix did not have to help us, but he did, without question and without condition.”
Jeremy’s eyes softened, but his expression remained guarded. “Eloise, I left to handle our family’s business. I thought you knew that. I was going to help you… to help us.”
“And while you were off handling business, Mother and I were barely holding things together,” she replied, her voice steady but her hands trembling. “Carlisle and his men visited us on more than one occasion, the last of which Felix happened upon. It was truly awful, Jeremy. Those men are nothing short of brutes.”
“And so, my so-called friend thought he would take advantage.” His eyes bored once more into Felix.
“No,” Eloise said firmly, furious at her brother’s blind obstinacy. “Felix was the only one who stood by us. He did not owe us anything, and yet he took on our family’s debt to protect us. Marriage was the only way; if it hadn’t been Felix, I would have had to find some other man.”
“Any other man would have been better,” Jeremy muttered.
Eloise sighed. “You do not mean that, brother. If you want to be angry, be angry with me. But do not dare to insult him. He has done nothing but help us.”
Jeremy looked down, shame filling his eyes, and she felt a sharp pang of sympathy for him.
He hadn’t known; he couldn’t have known. Had he been here, she knew he would have done everything in his power to protect them.
He took a slow breath, his anger receding as her words settled over him.
“I was trying my best,” he muttered.
“We know,” Eloise said, her voice softer. “And there was nothing more you could have done. It is not your fault, Jeremy. But Felix has been absolutely wonderful in helping us. There is no reason for you to be angry with him.”
He turned back to Felix, who stood silently watching the exchange.
“Very well,” Jeremy muttered. “Thank you for helping my family. But that does not change the fact that this marriage is one of convenience and not at all what I had hoped for my sister.”
Felix said nothing.
Eloise looked at him sadly. Was that how he still thought of their marriage?
Surely not. After everything we have been through together, he must surely have feelings for me.
And yet he didn’t defend her, didn’t declare any feelings for her.
Jeremy turned back to Eloise, his expression softening. “Felix will make a terrible husband, Eloise. I know him; we have been to the gaming hells and brothels together. This life,” he gestured between them, “is not something he is suited for.”
“Brother—”
“He’s not going to make you happy, Eloise,” he interrupted. “You deserve more than a marriage of convenience, more than a man who will never change his sordid ways. I know him far better than you do. He will only break your heart.”
A flash of hurt crossed her face, but before she could respond, Jeremy turned, his expression tight. He stormed down the corridor and out of sight, leaving her and Felix standing in silence, his parting words polluting the air between them.
Eloise looked over at Felix, her anger replaced with something gentler as she searched his expression for answers.
But Felix refused to meet her gaze; his jaw was set and his posture was stiff as if he’d fortified the walls around him in anticipation of her reaction.
Felix watched his friend storm away from them.
He was right.
Felix had been a fool to think he could be different from who he really was. The last few weeks had merely been a dream.
“Felix?” Eloise’s voice pulled him back, and he saw her staring at him, her hand still outstretched mere inches away from his arm.
He took a small step back, so she could not touch him. “Jeremy is right to have doubts about me, Eloise.” he said softly.
Eloise shook her head, her brow furrowing. “You do not mean that. Jeremy is just angry, Felix. We were expecting that, were we not? He does not understand?—”
Felix cut her off, his tone sharper than he’d intended. “He knows and understands exactly what kind of man I am. What a poor husband I would make.” He let out a bitter laugh, shaking his head. “Did you really think a few weeks of playing house would change me?”
Eloise’s eyes flashed with frustration. “I never thought you needed changing; I simply wanted you . I want you as you are.”
He clenched his jaw, the hurt in her voice nearly undoing him. “You only think that because you have not seen it all,” he murmured, more to himself than to her. “You do not know what I am capable of.”
“Felix,” she said, her voice low but steady as she took a step closer to him, “we all have pasts. Yours does not define you any more than mine. I do not care what you have done before?—”
“You should,” he interrupted, his voice rough. “Because it will catch up to us, Eloise. It will hurt you.” He paused, taking a slow breath. “And I do not think I could live with that.”
She stared at him incredulously. “So what, then? You are going to leave me? Is that it?” Her voice rose, her anger barely contained. “You would rather abandon our marriage than face your fears? All because my brother cannot control his emotions?”
Felix felt a familiar tightness in his chest, his desire to protect her dissolving into desperation.
“I would rather walk away now,” he replied, his voice thick with forced calm, “than stay and watch this end in disaster.”
Eloise’s face hardened, her eyes blazing with frustration. “You are not protecting me by running away, Felix.”
He shook his head, anger and guilt crashing together inside of him, fueling a bitterness he could not hold back.
“Maybe…” he said defiantly. “Maybe this was a mistake from the very beginning.”
She flinched as though he’d struck her, and he felt the sting of his cruel words impale his conscience, but he couldn’t stop the momentum of their imminent destruction.
This was what he’d wanted to avoid: the hurt, the disappointment, the inevitable fracture he’d always known would come.
“Then go,” she whispered, her voice trembling but strong. “If that is what you desire, go.”
Felix hesitated, his heart warring with his head.
He knew himself too well; he knew he would only end up hurting her more, no matter how much he wanted to stay.
He steeled himself outwardly, nodding once, and turned on his heel, forcing himself not to look back.