Chapter 14 #2
He sighs. “Oh, I don’t know. My guess is that Henri wants to prove something to him. Show him all the good he has done with the curse he’s been given. It is why he takes people in, like you and many, many others, and puts on this show of perfection.”
I instantly think of Haven. “He destroys lives to make his seem perfect.”
What else has Henri lied about?
I think of the night that had changed my life, the fire at my family’s farm that claimed my mother and brother. Could Henri be responsible for tampering with my life, too?
“Yes, well, now you know one of the reasons Malcolm chose him.”
Hard footsteps come from above, and with every step, dust swirls and falls from the wooden planks that make up the ceiling. I freeze.
“Keagan,” he whispers, answering my thoughts.
I move away from the door but wish I didn’t to leave him this way. “I’ll come back for you tomorrow night once the guests start to arrive,” I promise.
Lysander gives a dry laugh. “Yes, please, because I am desperately looking forward to the party.”
Haven
Alone in my bedroom, I start to undress. I step out of the thick gown, relieved once the heavy material leaves my body, and slip out of my heeled boots next. The pins come out of my hair next, and finally the jewelry.
Facing the standup mirror, I tug on a plain shirt made of cotton, lace up a corset, and pull on a pair of stockings before looking at my half-dressed reflection.
A mass of dark curls cascade down my front, but it’s not enough to hide the two raised bruises on my neck from Henri.
Across my cheek, the pink mark from Henri’s ring stands out despite the rosiness of my skin, and I frown.
Am I beautiful? I’ve never thought myself as such. I’ve always been torn and broken, never beautiful. No matter how many times Henri has said I was. Even with the custom-made gowns and gaudy jewelry, I have only played the part of beautiful, but never truly was.
Now that the layers of clothing have been stripped away, and I stand here partly naked and vulnerable, I can see only the truth staring back at me.
And it hurts. My father is still gone. The pain of his death weighs heavy in my chest. There are still rope burns on my wrists, cuts on my face, and bruises all over my skin.
I certainly look like I’m in pieces, but there’s something different about me this time.
Somehow I feel… whole.
It doesn’t make sense. I know it doesn’t, but it’s true. Things are different now. Something’s changed.
Avrum. My reflection’s eyes widen as the answer comes to me at once. I gained the pulse of life again the moment Avrum offered me his scarred hand and given me hope. Then again when he’d pressed his lips against mine for the first time in this very room.
Is it beauty I am feeling? Is it strength? Love? My mirrored-self smiles back at me. It must be.
Hushed voices come from outside my bedroom door. Keys jingle, and the lock releases. Still only partially clothed, I wrap my arms around myself. Over my reflection’s shoulder, I watch as the door opens.
I suck in a deep breath as Avrum walks in. When he sees me standing there, partially exposed to him, he stops short. Heat rises to my cheeks and travels to my lower belly as his eager eyes roam my body and his lips part from hunger. He takes three steps forward but pauses just behind me.
When his darkened gaze meets mine through the mirror, I notice the battle raging inside him.
“Haven.” He breathes my name, and my insides tremble at the amount of desire threaded in his tone.
I lick my lips in anticipation, and when he sees it, he takes another step forward.
His hands come up and touched my shoulders, and instantly my body relaxes.
The entire time, I watch him from the mirror.
They slide down my arms, and as he presses himself against my back, I can feel every rigid muscle of his chest and the stiffness of his groin.
My heartbeat gallops. With him so close to me, I can barely think straight.
He is the escape I crave. And when his warm breath tickles the hollow of my neck, all I can think about is our entwined bodies in the attic and how amazing he felt thrusting into me until we both came undone in each other’s arms.
His expert fingers find the string tie at the center of my breasts, and he quickly pulls the knot free. The material slips away, revealing even more of me to the mirror and to him.
I’m watching every movement, every hitch of his breath, and seeing it does things to me I can’t explain.
It gets my blood pumping and my skin tingles everywhere his gaze lingers.
I ache for more of him; it’s a need I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to fully conquer.
But as he reaches under my shirt and releases one of my naked breasts, I moan out loud.
He begins to rub my nipple with the pad of his finger, and I want nothing more than to taste his lips again, but when I try to turn around in his arms, he holds me firmly in place.
“I want you to watch yourself come undone by my touch,” he whispers as he continues to play with my breast and leave hot kisses along my neck. His words draw a shudder from me, and I lock eyes with him through the reflection. “I want you to see what I see when you’re drowning in pleasure.”
“Avurm…” My knees weaken.
As he kisses up to my ear, his teeth grazing the lobe, he slips his free hand up my thigh. When fingers brush my sex, I jump.
I can do nothing but watch him through the mirror. His hooded eyes as he watches my reactions, my own expressions as he touches and teases me… It’s almost too much to take.
One finger disappears inside me, pushing past my tightness, my breath catches.
He grins. “You’re beautiful,” he mutters.
For the first time in my entire life, I believe it. I feel it. In my heart and soul. With the way Avrum’s adoring me, I can’t see a way he could be wrong.
His thumb finds the most sensitive part of me and rubs it. My hips move to match the rhythm, and my legs open wider for him on their own. He responds by sliding another digit in while picking up pace with his thumb.
Pleasure mounts. There’s a familiar tightness in my lower belly and hotness spreading over my skin. When he gets me to my peak, I gasp loudly and lose all strength in my legs. It if weren’t for Avrum’s strong grip on me, I would’ve surely fallen over.
But his grip is firm, even when my breathing turns ragged and I collapse into his embrace.
Just then, Avrum spins me around and captures my mouth for another hungry and head-whirling kiss.
Our tongues dance and slowly he moves us both toward the bed.
Wanting more, I reach for the fasten of his pants.
“Move aside,” a shrill voice barks from outside my door. We both halt.
As if I’d been dunked in ice water, every part of me freezes over.
“I am Haven’s caretaker, so I’m the only one meant to be stationed at her door.”
It’s Keagan. I can recognize that high-pitched, heavily Irish-accented voice anywhere.
Terrified, I glance up at Avrum, but he only hushes me with a shake of his head.
“I was told this was my post,” the unknown guard replies outside.
“By whom?”
“By Brenin.”
Keagan growls fiercely. The shadows beneath the doorframe shift. “I am the head of the guard, and I order you to disregard his command and renounce your post,” he says.
My pulse quickens. Will Keagan come in? If we’re discovered, I’ll never be able to see Avrum again.
“I’m sorry, Keagan, but I was given strict orders from Brenin to remain here until he gave word. He is Lord Henri’s second, after all.”
Keagan shouted curses at him.
As they continue to argue, I smooth the top of my shirt and retie the knot to hide my exposed breasts. When I go to reach for my gown on the floor, Avrum pulls me back up by the hand.
Our eyes meet. “I am sorry it has taken me so long,” he whispers, “but with everything that has happen and may happen, I feel as if I have to say it.”
Confused and nervous, I glance back to the door. Any minute it could open and reveal what we were doing.
“Say it? What do you mean?”
He leans forward and takes the sides of my face in his hands. “I am in love with you, Haven.” A smile lights up his face. “I’ve fallen completely and madly in love with you.”
The same words hover on my tongue too, but my fear prevents them from spilling out.
There’s a loud thump as Keagan punches the wall in anger. The door shakes from the force. Then, heavy footsteps stomp down the hall.
After a few moments, another door slams in the distance.
My chest heaves.
“Keagan left,” Avrum says to console me, but I still can’t seem to catch my breath. “I think it’s safe for me to leave now.”
I nod. As much as I don’t want him to go, I know he has to. The guard outside my bedroom will find it strange if he never leaves.
“You should get some sleep. Morning is here, and you will need your strength for tonight.”
“What will you do till then? Will you sleep?” I ask.
“I was on my way to the attic to get in more practice with my sword before I came here. I need to be ready to defend you if the time comes.”
I don’t want to think about Avrum and Henri locked in a duel. It makes a chill snake up my spine.
“Haven, please don’t worry yourself,” he says gently, as if he knows where my thoughts have gone. “I made my choice a long time ago. I am going to help you leave here. It doesn’t matter what happens to me.”
“But it does matter. To me.”
“And that is enough to make me fight harder.” Avrum gives me a small, reassuring smile before taking me by the hand and placing a soft kiss on the back of it. “By this time tomorrow, you, Emma, and I will be far away from this place. There will be no more worrying or pain. It will be just us.”
“Just us,” I repeat, loving the way that sounds out loud. I never thought two words could ever sound so beautiful.