Chapter 14
Simon
The days had started to blur together in the best possible way.
Tanner was settling into ranch life with an ease that surprised both of us. He'd begun helping with morning chores without being asked, and while I made sure he didn't overwork himself, I could see how the routine was good for him. Grounding him in ways his law practice never had.
We'd established our own rhythm too. Mornings started with breakfast together, just the two of us before the rest of the ranch woke up.
Afternoons were spent working—him helping where he could, me keeping an eye on him to make sure he took breaks.
Evenings were ours, whether that meant sitting with the other guys or stealing quiet moments alone.
And the nights… the nights were becoming my favorite part.
We hadn't gone further than what happened in the barn, but we'd gotten comfortable with touch. With falling asleep tangled together. With waking up the same way.
I was learning him, piece by piece. Learning what made him sigh contentedly and what made him tense. Learning when he needed space and when he needed to be held.
We’d also talked more about what we did and didn’t want.
This time it was less about him being little and more about our sexual desires.
His hard limits matched mine, which felt a bit like fate.
There was no other way to explain how this perfect boy had shown up in my life and torn down the last bit of resistance I had about falling in love again.
Today, I had something special planned.
I'd ordered the pajamas right after finding those children's books hidden in his apartment and paid extra to have them shipped express.
The set had caught my eye immediately—soft cotton covered in cheerful gray elephants, the kind of thing that was clearly meant for someone embracing their little side but subtle enough that it just looked like fun sleepwear.
The package had arrived in the middle of the night, and I'd wrapped it this morning before Tanner woke up. Now it sat on his bed, waiting for him to find it after dinner.
"You're smiling like you know something," Jackson said, pulling me from my thoughts.
We were in the kitchen, cleaning up after the evening meal. Most of the guys had dispersed to their various activities, and Tanner was in the living room with Sean and Elton, the three of them bent over what looked like a board game.
"Maybe I do," I said, not bothering to hide my grin.
Jackson shook his head, amusement dancing in his eyes. "That boy's got you wrapped around his finger."
"Good." I dried the last dish and hung up the towel. "That's exactly where I want to be."
"Beau said the same thing about me once." Jackson leaned against the counter, arms crossed. "Said I looked at him like he hung the moon."
"And?"
"And he was right." His expression softened in that way it only did when he talked about his husband. "Letting myself fall was the best thing that ever happened to me."
I knew what he was really saying. That it was okay to let myself feel this deeply, this quickly. That what Tanner and I had was real, even if it had only been a short time.
"Thanks," I said quietly.
He nodded and pushed off the counter. "I'm heading out. Beau wanted to watch some documentary about wolves or some shit. You good here?"
"Yeah, I'm good."
After he left, I made my way to the living room. Tanner looked up as I approached, his whole face lighting up in a way that never failed to make my chest warm.
"Hey, Daddy," he said softly, mindful of Elton and Sean nearby even though they both knew about us.
"Hey, bud. You about ready to head up?"
He glanced at the cards in his hand, then at Sean. "Can we finish this round first?"
"Course we can," Sean said, grinning at me. "Won't take but a minute. I'm about to destroy him anyway."
"Are not!" Tanner protested, but he was smiling.
I settled onto the arm of the couch to watch, enjoying the easy banter between them. Tanner had needed this—friends, community, people who cared about him outside of what he could do for them professionally.
True to Sean's word, the game wrapped up quickly. Tanner did lose, but he didn't seem to mind, laughing as Sean did a ridiculous victory dance.
"Alright, alright," I said, standing and offering Tanner my hand. "Come on. Let's get you upstairs."
He took my hand and let me pull him to his feet. "I'm not a sore loser."
"Uh-huh." I guided him toward the stairs, calling goodnight to Sean and Elton over my shoulder.
"I'm not!" Tanner insisted as we climbed the stairs. "I just think Sean might have been cheating."
"He absolutely was," I confirmed. "He does it every time."
"Then why didn't you say something?"
"Because watching you try to figure out how he was doing it was more entertaining."
He swatted at my arm playfully, and I caught his hand, bringing it to my lips to press a kiss to his knuckles.
At the door to his room—our room, really, since I'd been sleeping there every night—I stopped him before he could go in. I needed to hint at the gift without giving anything away.
"What?" he asked, looking up at me with curious eyes.
"There might be something waiting for you in there. I came up here before and saw it, which is why I came to get you."
His eyes widened. "Another gift? You should have said something!"
I couldn't quite hide my smile. "Go look."
He pushed open the door, and I followed him in, watching as his gaze immediately found the wrapped package on the bed. He approached it slowly, almost reverently, like each gift was still a surprise even though he had to know by now that his Secret Santa was consistently thoughtful.
He picked up the package and looked back at me. "Should I open it now?"
"Whenever you want, bud. Though I’m curious to know what it is."
He sat on the edge of the bed and carefully unwrapped it, taking his time with the paper like he wanted to preserve it. When he finally revealed the pajamas, he went completely still.
"Oh," he breathed.
I watched his face carefully, trying to gauge his reaction. His fingers traced over the elephant print, and I could see the moment emotion threatened to overwhelm him.
"They're perfect," he whispered. "How did they know?"
It took everything in me not to confess right then. To tell him it was me, that I'd chosen them specifically because I wanted him to have something that let him be little without feeling self-conscious about it.
Instead, I moved to sit beside him on the bed. "Your Secret Santa has good taste."
"They really do." He held the pajamas up, examining them. "I've wanted something like this for so long, but I always talked myself out of buying it. Told myself it was silly, or that I didn't need them, or—"
"Hey." I put my hand on his knee. "It's not silly. And you do need them. You need things that make you happy, that let you be yourself."
He looked at me, eyes shining. "You really think so?"
"I know so."
He set the pajamas carefully on the bed and then launched himself at me, wrapping his arms around my neck. I caught him easily, holding him close.
"Thank you," he murmured against my shoulder.
"I didn't do anything."
"You're here. That's everything. I’m not opening this up alone." He pulled back to look at me. "Can I put them on?"
"Of course. You don't have to ask permission for that, bud."
"I know, I just—" He bit his lip. "Will you stay? While I change?"
The vulnerability in the question made my chest ache. He wasn't just asking me to stay in the room. He was asking me to see this part of him, to witness him embracing his little side.
"I'm not going anywhere," I promised.
He grabbed the pajamas and disappeared into the bathroom. I heard the water run briefly—him probably brushing his teeth—and then he emerged.
The pajamas fit him perfectly. The pants hit right at his ankles, and the shirt was loose and comfortable looking.
But more than that, he looked… soft. Younger.
The stress lines that had been etched into his face when he first arrived had smoothed out, and standing there in his elephant pajamas, he looked content.
"What do you think?" he asked, doing a small turn. There was shyness in the gesture, but also pride.
"I think you look perfect," I said honestly. "The elephants suit you."
His smile could have lit up the whole room. "Yeah? They’re my favorite."
"Yeah." I stood and crossed to him, running my hands down his arms. "Comfortable?"
"So comfortable." He pressed into my touch. "I feel… I don't know. Safe? Is that weird?"
"Not even a little bit." I pressed a kiss to his forehead. "That's exactly how you should feel."
He wrapped his arms around my waist and just stood there, letting me hold him. I could feel some of the tension he'd been carrying drain away, his body relaxing into mine.
"I wish I knew who my Secret Santa was," he said after a moment. "I want to thank them properly."
Guilt pricked at me. I knew the big reveal was supposed to happen on Christmas, that keeping it secret was part of the tradition. But watching him struggle with not being able to express his gratitude made me want to confess everything.
Not yet, though.
Just a little longer.
"I'm sure they know you're grateful," I said instead. "They can probably tell by how happy you are."
"I am happy." He tilted his head back to look at me. "Happier than I've been in years."
The confession made my heart stutter. "Yeah?"
"Yeah." He stood on his toes and kissed me softly. "Thank you for that. For helping me find this."
"You found it yourself, bud. I just gave you a safe place to land."
"That's everything, though. Don't you see?" His hands fisted my shirt. "You gave me everything."
I didn't know what to say to that, so I just held him tighter and hoped he could feel everything I couldn't put into words.
Eventually, we made our way to bed. Tanner curled up against my side immediately, his head on my chest and one leg thrown over mine.
"Daddy?" he said quietly, just as I thought he was falling asleep.
"Yeah, bud?"
"Will you read to me sometime? From one of the books you found at my apartment?"
My breath caught. "You want me to read you a bedtime story?"
"Is that okay?" His voice was small, uncertain. "I know it's probably weird—"
"It's not weird," I interrupted firmly. "And yes, I'll read to you. Anytime you want."
He relaxed against me. "Tomorrow?"
"Tomorrow," I promised. "Now get some sleep, sweet boy."
"Okay." He nuzzled closer. "Love the pajamas."
"I can tell." I ran my fingers through his hair, the gesture soothing for both of us. "They look good on you."
"Mm." He was definitely falling asleep now, his breathing evening out. "Everything's good with you."
I waited until I was sure he was fully asleep before I whispered, "Everything's good with you too, bud. So fucking good."
I lay there in the darkness, listening to him breathe, feeling the weight of him against me. In such a short amount of time, this man had become essential to me. Had worked his way into my heart so completely that I couldn't imagine my life without him anymore.
Wren would have liked him, I thought. Would have appreciated his kindness, his dedication to helping others, his soft heart hidden under all those lawyer defenses.
And more than that, Wren would have been happy for me. Happy that I'd found someone to care for again, someone who needed what I had to give.
One gift at a time, I was building something beautiful with him.