Chapter 10
10
E lodie
I stare up at the man Jaeger told me about.
“But…” Jaeger said Father Francis raised him. This man doesn’t look old enough to have raised a grown man. “I didn’t realize,” I finish.
Father Francis doesn’t seem ruffled by my scrutiny of him.
“I’ve known Jaeger a long time,” he says, as if he can hear my thoughts. “Since he was a boy. I took my position here when I was twenty-six. At the time, this was a poor parish with an aging clergy and a church building in need of renovation. No one wanted a position here.” He glances around the gorgeous sanctuary.
I find my voice and follow his gaze to take in the finery surrounding us. “This place is beautiful.”
“We’re blessed now with some very generous donors. I believe you’ve met a few of them by working at Inferno.” Father Francis folds his hands in front of him, looking at me expectantly as if he’s said something revealing.
Is this place connected to Fraternitas? Jaeger said he and St. James were raised by Father Francis, along with the head of the organization, a man I only know as The Devil.
Could the brotherhood be the church’s main donor? It would make sense if they wanted to give back to the man who’d helped them and so many other kids.
Does a priest really associate with a gang leader called The Devil?
“Maybe,” I say. I glance at his hands, checking for a skull ring.
With a sly smile, he raises his hands and shows me the front and back. His fingers are bare. The only jewelry he’s wearing is the cross.
Instead of feeling relieved, I tense up further. He seems to be reading my mind. And is amused by my scrutiny.
He’s a priest, for godssakes. So why do I feel like a shark is circling me in the water?
“I know you’ve met St. James,” he says.
Ah yes. Anyone associated with St. James isn’t someone I’ll let my guard down around. Although it’s ironic how much a soulless man like St. James is involved with a church.
“Why do you think Jaeger wanted us to meet?” I ask.
He cocks his head. “You don’t know?” He presses his lips together, and I get the feeling that while I had once been an interesting specimen, now I’ve disappointed him. “I suppose it’s not for me to explain.”
What the fuck does that mean? I open my mouth to ask, but he continues, “Suffice it to say, Jaeger is very important to me. And he knows I’d want to meet anyone important to him.”
My rude retort dies on my tongue.
Father Francis’s eyes narrow at my speechlessness. Before he can say anymore, I hear my name.
“Elodie.” Jaeger appears, walking back from the altar. He comes to me and slides me into his arms before facing Father Francis. “I see you’ve met each other.”
“Yes,” Father Francis says. “We were just speaking of you.”
“Nothing bad, I hope.” Jaeger smiles but searches my face. I must look a little shell-shocked.
I feel like I’ve been called to meet Jaeger’s one and only parent without any warning.
I guess I have.
A shadow slants across us as another figure winds around the altar. It’s Kaiser, dressed in jeans and a leather jacket, black from head to toe. He glares at us. Without a word of greeting, he makes his way down the side aisle and leaves.
I look from Kaiser’s retreating back to Jaeger. Were the brothers meeting here? Or did Kaiser just happen to be here?
What is going on?
Jaeger returns my gaze but says nothing.
“It’s lovely to see you here, Jaeger,” Father Francis says. “Will you two stay for mass?”
Jaeger shakes his head.
“Ah, well,”—the priest shrugs—“I had to ask.”
“ Dum spiro spero ,” Jaeger says, and Father Francis grins.
“I see some of the Latin lessons stuck.” Father Francis stands to let Jaeger pass. “Goodbye, then. And good to meet you, Elodie. I have a feeling we’ll be seeing more of each other.” He stands in the aisle and watches us exit.
“What did you say?” I ask Jaeger as he carries me away.
“It’s Latin. ‘While I breathe, I hope.’”
He carries me out, and at the top of the steps, I can see into the next lot, which has a playground filled with children.
“Is that the school?” I point to it.
“Yes.”
I crane my head as we pass the fence, but I can’t see more than a modest brick building five or six stories high with many windows.
Jaeger told me he hadn’t attended the school, but obviously, Father Francis tried to give him an education anyway. It makes sense. Some of Jaeger’s manners and way of speaking are oddly formal. And I’ve never met a thug who knows Latin.
He sets me in the car and heads around to the driver’s side. He still hasn’t told me what he was doing or why Kaiser was there.
“Did you get your errand done?” I probe.
“Yes.” He puts his hand on the stick shift but pauses, turning to give me a long look.
I want to ask him more about his brother and Father Francis and what errand required him to visit the church, but I don’t. I lick my lips and settle back in the seat. Jaeger puts the car in gear, and we leave St. Xavier’s and Father Francis behind.
“Elodie,” a deep voice calls my name. “Elodie, wake up.”
I come awake with a gasp. I’m in the dark bedroom with Jaeger beside me. He’s propped up on an elbow, his free hand on my shoulder. He orders the lights to turn on the lowest level.
“You were having a bad dream.”
I’m still in its clutches. There was a dark tunnel of trees, and I was running like I did with Jaeger. But it wasn’t him chasing me. It was someone from the past, someone I’ve tried hard to forget.
I’m covered in a cold sweat, gripping the blankets. I suck in a breath to come back into myself.
Jaeger tucks a curl behind my ear. “You okay?”
“I’m fine.”
“You want to tell me about it?”
Instead of answering, I curl toward him, tucking my face into his chest. We’ve grown closer these past few days, but I don’t want to tell him about that part of my past. It’ll bring up too many questions. He’ll find out the most traumatic thing that ever happened to me.
Jaeger isn’t the worst predator I’ve ever met. He’s bigger and badder and way more dangerous, but obviously, my psyche thinks he’s safe. That’s why I’m dreaming about the past—so I can purge it. Deep down, I know if I tell him the story about the man who hurt me, Jaeger would make sure that man paid the price for what he did.
Jaeger wraps his arms around me and kisses the top of my head. I’m relaxed and starting to drift back to sleep when he slips his hand between my legs.
I open my eyes, coming awake. The lights are still on, low enough for me to fall asleep but bright enough for me to see the gleam in Jaeger’s stormy eyes. It has to be around midnight, and he’s already fucked me, so I’m not sure what’s going on. Maybe he wants me to forget my nightmare?
For a moment, he only strokes me, holding my gaze as his thumb tickles my clit. My hips start to move, and he stops until I grow still, and then he starts stroking me again.
“I’ll be gone most of the day tomorrow. Will you miss me?”
I stare at him. He’s trying to have a conversation, now?
He stops touching me. “Will you miss me?”
Yes. My body knows the right answer. “No,” I lie. Each day has me closer to healing fully and escaping.
Except I haven’t thought much of escaping lately. Yeah, I’m weirded out by all the Fraternitas stuff and today’s outing to meet Father Frances. But I’m loving my lazy days in this gorgeous penthouse. Going on the run will mean living out of gross, pay-by-the-day motels, places that take cash so I can fly under the radar. I’ll have to find a place to hide out. Get a new job.
It’ll suck, but that’s life. We’re all running and running until death catches us.
With enough running, I might be able to forget Jaeger, who’s currently frowning at me like he can read my thoughts. I wipe my face clear of expression.
“What?”
“Hmmm.” He goes back to stroking me, running his thumb up and down the seam of my lower lips. I want to grab his wrist and grind against his hand, but I don’t want to break the spell. My orgasm creeps closer as the seconds tick by. I’m about to ride the gentle swell, but he pauses again.
“What did you think of my brother?” he asks, and my pleasure dies, remembering Jaeger’s face on a cold-eyed stranger. It was a shock to see him at St. Xavier’s.
“I don’t think he likes me. Like, at all.” I shudder, remembering his threats outside the women’s bathroom at Inferno.
Jaeger dismisses this with a toss of his head. “He doesn’t like anyone.”
“Not even you?” I got the feeling Kaiser threatened me out of a protective instinct for his brother.
Jaeger takes my hand and transfers it to the bulging pectoral muscle under his collarbone. My fingers graze the raised ridge of a long-healed wound. I’ve come to realize his tattoos hide a maze of scars. This one is large and very close to his heart.
“What’s this?”
“From the time Kaiser tried to kill me.”
My fingers freeze on his chest. “What? Why?”
“It was when we were young. Do not worry. He probably won’t ever do it again.”
I’m speechless, and my body’s gone cold. Jaeger shifts under me, and my leg brushes his hard cock. A minute ago, I would’ve rolled onto my back to receive him, but now I’m fighting the urge to curl into a ball.
Is he telling me this because he wants me to share about my own nightmares?
The scar is so real under my fingertips. I shouldn’t pry into Jaeger’s violent past. I’ve kept my head in the sand this long. And yet…
“How old were you?” I ask.
He smiles. “Fifteen.”
I suck in a breath.
“We were in the fighting rings. The ones under the city.”
“The ones Fraternitas runs?”
“At the time, Fraternitas did not run them because Fraternitas barely existed. Kaiser and I were under the care”—another bleak smile—“of a man named Maestro. He was our guardian in name. He stole us off the streets and kept us captive. And when we were of age, he made us fight.”
My breath is frozen in my lungs. Terrible images flood my mind. My veins feel tight like they used to when I was craving a hit.
“What age?” I whisper.
“He took ownership of us after we hit puberty. We spent a year and a half in the rings.”
I run my hands over his shoulders and chest, finding the bumps and ragged edges of his scars under the ink. I knew his life had been brutal. I didn’t realize the violence had started when he was so young.
“What about Father Francis?”
“He searched for us. So did St. James and all the rest of the street children who would become Fraternitas. Maestro hid Kaiser and me away in a place where they could not find us. Until the day we broke free.”
My fingers find the scar over his heart. “What happened?”
“We killed him. After he made us fight each other, and Kaiser gave me this.” He covers my hand with his large one, molding my palm to his marred chest. Our hands rise and fall with his breath. “To save my life. To save both our lives. Maestro decreed that one of us would fall, and so I did. And as I lay bleeding out, Kaiser turned on Maestro and killed him.”
I close my eyes, but the scene Jaeger described plays out in my mind. Over and over, unending. Two identical blond-haired boys, wild and covered in blood, grappling in a shadowy circle.
Jaeger rubs the top of my hand, and my eyes snap open. I stare into the stormy seas of his irises, feeling like I’ve seen every part of him, inside and out. I’ve never been so close to anyone.
I’ve never let someone get so close to me. Our breath mingles and becomes one. “Why are you telling me this?”
“I know you want me, Elodie. But you’re also afraid.”
I roll away from him and curl into a ball. He rolls, too, surrounding me. His hard dick prods my backside, but he keeps his hand threaded with mine, clasped against my heart.
His lips find my ear. “Did you know the night we met was my birthday? You were St. James’ gift to me.” His tone is soft with wonder. “I’ve never had a birthday gift before. Maestro kept us in cages.”
I squeeze my eyes tighter.
He continues so softly I can’t be sure I haven’t imagined it. “I know you don’t want to know this about me. I know you want to run.” His breath stirs the curls at the back of my neck. “But you’re brave, braver than you know.” He’s so close his lips brush the back of my ear. “I’ve never told anyone these things, Elodie. Not even Father Francis or my Fraternitas brothers. Kaiser and I never speak of it. But if there’s a chance someone in this world will know everything about me, I want it to be you.”