10. Papa Problems
Papa Problems
Jasper
M y phone rang much earlier than I’d hoped for.
I’d been having the most amazing dream and tried to turn back to where I’d been with Dakota.
We’d been curled together. He had me wrapped in his muscled arms, thrusting deep inside me from behind.
I ached with how empty I felt as the ringing continued.
My cock leaked against my stomach as I batted at my phone, attempting to silence it.
The moon run last night meant that most shifters would sleep in today.
I was trying to enjoy my first chance to sleep in since we’d been here.
A couple of hours’ extra sleep and a leisurely jerking off session had been in my plans.
Angelica would likely sleep until late morning after her late night and all the running she’d done as her fox, giving me some much needed free time.
Alas, whoever was calling me had other plans.
Surrendering to the inevitable, I picked up the phone. Immediately regretting that I didn’t check the caller ID before answering. “Hello?”
“I’m mad at you. So mad I couldn’t sleep, and that means that Blake is mad at you because not sleeping is bad for the babies.
I’m on my way and since I’m not allowed coffee now, you better dig out some chamomile tea.
” There was a pause. “Roan, we need food first.” It was clear Kade was no longer speaking to me, but I didn’t dare to hang up.
“This place is good. Pull in here.” Roan muttered something I didn’t catch.
“Ooh, let’s order that.” A pause. “Yummy! I’m not mad at Angel, so she gets breakfast.” The line went dead.
Guess I was getting up and making tea, then.
I hastily washed and dressed. My erection had gone after my brief chat with my son, though I still longed to crawl into bed and use the toy in my drawer. Again. It would only make me feel guilty and sad when I’d end up dreaming about Dakota instead of Silas, so maybe it was for the best.
Looking at the half empty closet, I couldn’t help frowning.
I missed all of my things. The box that Silas had sent was barely a few more changes of clothes.
Kade had suggested a few stores in town, but my focus had been on Angelica, so I was stuck wearing the same things over and over.
Not that I was trying to impress anyone, I just wanted to feel more comfortable.
I thought that if I had more of my stuff, this place would feel more like my home.
My fox constantly needled me that this didn’t feel like home because our mate wasn’t here. I’d taken to ignoring them.
Kade still had a key, and he let himself in twenty minutes later, chewing on a pastry. “I’m slightly less mad now that I have food.” He announced before taking a seat on the sofa.
“Hey, Jasper,” Roan greeted. He handed over a paper bag. “Breakfast for you and Angelica. Where’s the little kit?”
I looked around hopefully for Blake. He’d be my ally. “No, Blake?”
“Nah, he has work and Dakota is starting work for him today. Roan is perfectly capable of guarding me himself until I get further along.” Kade rubbed his stomach with a small smile.
“Okay, then.” I went into the kitchen to make tea for us all before second guessing and heading back to check what Roan wanted.
Kade shot him a look that suggested murder if he even thought about taking the coffee that I offered. He hastily declined.
“I’ll just pop this in the oven on low until Angel gets up.” I called through as I bustled about, making drinks, organizing the food and locating a tray for it all.
“So the no coffee thing is going well?” I asked, figuring I’d already pissed him off.
I couldn’t make it much worse. Kade was like me in so many ways.
Our tempers ran fast and hot. Then quickly blew over and everything was cool again.
I set the tray on the coffee table and took a seat on the other side of the sofa from my son.
“I know I can have some, and it should be fine. I’m a wolf, after all. With three babies and after being ill with the blockers only a month ago, I really don’t want to risk anything. Our cook at the compound is making lots of nutrient-rich foods and… I know what you are doing and I’m still mad!”
Dammit.
“Tell me, dear son, what have I done to anger you so?” I made it sound like I was reciting Shakespeare, and a grin tugged at Roan’s mouth.
“How could you reject Kota? Not even just once. He told us it was three times! I mean, I understand you maybe not wanting to bond as soon as you met him, but to not even consider it at all?” Kade was getting worked up.
Roan reached a hand out to calm him and a bolt of jealousy ran through me that I wasn’t able to be that for my son.
I wasn’t his comfort or safe space. Roan was, and he’d only been back in Kade’s life just days before I was.
It felt like there was a gulf I couldn’t cross between us that I was making wider by my actions. The side he was on was clear.
“It isn’t as easy as that. There are things to consider. I wasn’t sure at the time if we were staying. Then there’s you and your sister to think about.” I heard the excuses, and none of them sounded good enough. Kade would never accept them, regardless of how true they had been at the time.
“And Silas.” Kade practically spat.
“Yes, Si.” I aimed for patience I didn’t feel. Inside, I was a swirling pile of anxiety and pain. I didn’t want to hurt anyone and was causing pain for everyone. “The guy who I’ve been with for three years. I wasn’t about to ditch him for a man I just met.”
“Not just any man, though, your fated mate! And Dakota is lovely. How could you?” He sounded so damn hurt.
“Even if you didn’t want him now, how could you keep what he is to me secret?
” Kade looked like he was about to burst into tears.
“You’ve been here for over two weeks and had so many opportunities to tell me that Kota is my dad. ”
“Step-dad,” I said, automatically putting my foot in it further. I needed Kade to understand where I was coming from.
“Dad.” He repeated firmly. “Dakota was here looking after me when I was sick because you couldn’t be. He protected me when you couldn’t. Got fired because he came looking for me. If that isn’t dad behavior, then I don’t know what is.”
“He practically lived here until Kade met Blake.” Roan offered.
“Again, we’d seen each other once before.”
“Was that when you collapsed?” Roan asked.
“Collapsed? What happened?” I wanted to know every story, every little thing that had gone on while the council kept me apart from him.
Kade quickly outlined the visit to Blake’s office. “Dakota picked me up from the hospital. At first, I thought it would be weird because Kota had this crush on me —“
“What?” The word exploded out of me without my volition.
“So, it seems Dakota thought he had a crush on me when really his bear was saying he had to be close to me, probably because of you, right?” Kade turned towards me, his earlier frostiness forgotten.
“Janet, from the sleuth, had this vision that told us that Dakota was meant to be a part of my life. Guess we know why now.”
“Huh.” I didn’t know how I felt about that.
“The whole time that he stayed here, it was completely platonic. I was very upfront about not being anything more.” He thought for a second. “Ha!” The sound was loud in the silence. “I called him Daddy Kota! How funny is that? I was right.” He chuckled to himself and I smiled.
“Considering how ill you were, you really recovered quickly. I think a lot of that was because of the care you got from Dakota.” Roan offered with an apologetic smile my way.
“I seriously considered asking my council contact for help with you. You looked so ill and I was worried you wouldn’t get better.
Then Dakota was here all the time and within days there was a serious improvement. ”
“Okay, I should find it creepy that you were watching over me this whole time, but I don’t. I’m not going to look at that too hard. How did you know about how bad it was? Poppy saw me the day before and said nothing.”
“I may have paid the doctor off.” Roan mumbled.
“You what?” Kade and I spoke in unison.
“I’m not the only one,” Roan defended. “Rincoln had his people pay the doctor too, after they found out what your identity was.” Well, wasn’t that intrusive and entirely something that my ex would do? Thank The Luna he was gone from our lives forever.
“Putting that creepy-ness aside—“ Kade said.
“Hey! I needed to know what was wrong so I could protect you properly.” Roan frowned.
I got where he was coming from. We had divided the council over Rincoln and his pursuit of us.
Half had been in his pockets, buying information and favors, including a lenient sentence for his many crimes.
From what I could tell, from information I’d gleaned over the years, only a small fraction of them were responsible for keeping us safe.
His death for kidnapping Kade from his mate had unearthed most of his conspirators.
Rincoln had left dossiers on all the council members among his things, making it easy to have them removed from power.
A new council was rising, with my son as a representative.
“I was kidding, Roan.” Kade said gently, reaching for his guard’s hand.
“You did what you could with the info that you had. The important thing is that all that is over.” He turned to me.
“So, what are you going to do about Dakota? Don’t even lie that you aren’t feeling the pull.
Are you seriously telling me you are going to avoid him forever and stay with this Silas guy? ”
“Si and me… we have a good thing. It’s easy.”
“So it’s fear keeping you from making us a proper family?” Kade prompted.
“Look, it was a lot when we got here. I’d traveled, alone, for the first time in years. I was suddenly with no support with a young child in a strange place. Then all at once I had this massive man in front of me that’s my mate. Then there was the mess I made with you and Blake—”
“Papa—”
“No. It was bad, Kade. I just wanted something safe and familiar. Silas is that to me. It took us years to be like this. I didn’t want to throw it all away. Besides, we’ve done the family thing before. It all went to shit. Aren’t we better off now?”
“What if we could be wonderful? What if Dakota is what fate and the goddess say? Your missing piece. Our missing piece.”
What if indeed.