12. Morning After
Morning After
Blake
H is heat broke in the early hours of the second morning.
We’d fallen asleep after with Kade spooned against me as I remained knotted inside him.
My last knot lasted for much longer than all the ones before it, only going down as the heat had finally broken and Kade had slipped into a deep, restorative sleep.
I held him close and watched him rest, stroking curls from his face and tracing the lines of his face, mapping each of the freckles that decorated his fine features, until sleep pulled me under too.
Kade stiffening roused me. He slowly tried to edge away from me and grimaced as my cock slipped free of his body. A pool of our fluids collected on the bed sheets.
I stroked my hand over his arm to reassure him, but he flinched away from me and leapt from the bed. “No, no, no, no. This cannot be happening!” He slapped a hand over the still healing mate bite and whimpered.
Slowly, to not spook him, I eased out of the bed and tried to move towards him. “Hey, hey, it’s okay. You wanted this. You said yes.”
“I did not!” His indignant face was cute. His cheeks flushed, and he pulled at his tangled hair.
“Sweetheart,” I attempted to soothe him while feeling ill that he thought I would violate him, “the bite wouldn’t have taken if there wasn’t consent.”
“But —“
“No, you wanted it. I asked clearly, and you said yes.” I said quietly but firmly. My wolf brushed along my mind, full of pride for being level-headed even when my heart wanted to break.
“I was out of my mind with my heat!” The Luna help me that hurt. It wasn’t true, but it still stung.
The more I thought of it, the more pain bloomed and cut deep. I’d never take advantage of anyone like that. Except, “you weren’t in heat. Not until after. The bite threw you into it.”
Later, when I could find humor in the whole thing, I would swear that Kade stamped his foot. “I was so!”
Deciding not to argue the point with him, I gave him an out. “Okay, so what do you want to do about it? I’m your fated. We were destined to meet and bond. You wear my mark.”
“You don’t wear mine.” Damn , another shot hit the target and I couldn’t help my flinch.
More reassurance came from my wolf. “True, but I hope that one day you’ll mark me back. We just need to decide what to do now.”
“Do?”
“The mark will wear off if we don’t complete the bonding, but with us being fated, it won’t be easy. The bond will pull at us and our wolves won’t be happy.”
Kade muttered something that I didn’t quite catch. “Sorry?”
“I said, I can’t feel my wolf.”
I could feel the color drain from my face and I staggered backwards and dropped to the mattress. Shit, it was worse than I thought.
“It’s not that bad,” Kade said, moving forwards automatically to reassure me. “It also should be temporary.”
“Are you sure?”
He became defensive, putting up his walls.
“As far as the doctors can tell. It’s why I passed out at the pack house.
Thank you for taking me to the hospital, by the way.
” His sweet voice turned cutting. “Oh, and I’m probably infertile, so we really should just let this bond lapse. Better for everyone.”
I felt sick. Children had always featured in my dreams of my future, but here was my fated telling me it likely wasn’t possible.
My wolf surged forward to rescue us both, probably realizing that I was about to say something stupid.
I really wanted kids to be a feature of my future.
My wolf sent calming vibes and reassurances.
Together, we recalled all the pups in the pack without parents over the years.
“It doesn’t matter,” we lied. Our feelings were secondary to our mate’s. We needed to save him from pain. I wanted to gather him into my arms and use touch to soothe him. “There are other ways. Adoption, for instance. The Luna sent me to you for a reason and I refuse to reject her gift.”
Kade’s mouth gaped until he recovered from his shock. “You’re a pack alpha. I’ve researched your pack. Your family has ruled for generations. You need an heir!”
While that was true, I recalled instances where alpha leaders hadn’t had children with their omegas before.
Fertility was an issue for shifters. “Yes, but I’m willing to wait to see if something can be done.
If not, I have an alpha cousin. He took the family name.
His line could carry on the family. There’s nothing to say they have to be blood related.
We could adopt.” As I offered our potential solutions, I willed myself to keep my voice steady and not betray an ounce of pain that I carried in my heart. My poor mate.
“Whoa! This is... this is too much. You need to slow down.”
“I know.” I held out a hand for him, hoping he’d join me on the bed, breathing a sigh of relief when he settled close to me. “Why don’t we just see where this goes? Date a little?”
“You’d be willing to do that?”
“Of course! Our bond is fragile, but I’m willing to earn your trust.” I drew on all the advice given to me from the omegas at home about how to treat a skittish mate. “I want to convince you that The Luna makes no mistakes. We are meant to be, but we can get to know each other first. Take it slow.”
Kade rested his head on my shoulder with a sigh. “Well, that’s a point in your favor already.”
I wrapped an arm around him. “What is?”
“You aren’t a pushy alpha.” I smiled into his hair and pressed a kiss on the top of his head. His words had given me hope I could rescue this situation. It wasn’t a rejection which would break me. I’d take my time with my reluctant mate.
Kade left half an hour later, after we had exchanged numbers and had showered together.
I smiled at the remembrance. I’d asked if he minded me getting washed as he ate some snacks that remained from the platters that had been delivered.
He’d shook his head as he nibbled on grapes and I’d left him to it.
When I’d stepped under the spray, I’d heard his footsteps entering the bathroom and grinned as the water soaked me, washing away cum, slick, and sweat.
He’d wrapped his arms around me and rested his head on my shoulder.
My wolf had chuffed his approval at letting the sweet omega come to us when he was ready.
We’d already decided that we had to be patient and it would all work out.
I had washed Kade diligently and then kissed him all over.
Dropping to my knees, I’d picked each foot up in turn as I washed them, kissing the arch of each and making him giggle.
I’d massaged shampoo into his tangled curls, careful to keep it from his eyes.
He had moaned as I worked his scalp and I’d willed my erection down.
Kade needed to know I wanted more than just his body. I wanted to care for him.
My wolf had struggled with Kade leaving without us. “When can I see you again?” I’d asked him, mentally restraining my wolf and pushing back a shift.
Kade had looked at me as if he could sense my growing distress. It’d hurt that he couldn’t feel the same connection that I did. His body language had screamed that he wanted to run. “I’ll call you and we can arrange something soon.”
Soon . My wolf had whined, a long, mournful sound, and I’d flinched at the pain conveyed in the sound. I’d known that I had to keep Kade from seeing how conflicted I was. He couldn’t feel any pressure to be with me or he’d bolt. A deeper sense had told me this. Kade was a flight risk.
“Okay. I’ll, uh, see you.”
“Yeah. Bye, Blake.”
He’d walked out of the door, and, for all I knew, out of my life for good. I’d allowed my wolf to howl it out, a stray tear escaping. Then I’d sucked it up and tried to be positive. What we had was special. I’d treated Kade well, so he’d call. He had to.
After leaving the room, I went to the bar and ordered a coffee while I waited for someone to pick me up.
I’d checked my messages, seeing several from my brothers and cousin asking where I was.
While Kade had slept the first night, I had answered their questions, and that had bought me some time away from my responsibilities and pack-mates.
Reality wanted to intrude in the worst way and I just hoped that one of my brothers picked me up.
Chase walked in, swinging his car keys and whistling a jaunty tune, looking smug. “Ah, there you are,” he said as he took a stool next to me.
“I’m here.” I confirmed with heavy sarcasm.
Now that Kade was out of my sight, I felt the pull to look for him, to have him by my side.
My wolf turned in circles and whimpered, feeling my frustration.
It was worse knowing that Kade wouldn’t be feeling the same pull.
I needed to get my mind off the whole situation, but that wouldn’t happen until I’d gone through it with Chase. He could tell Axel.
“So where is he?”
“Not here.” I barked. Chase flinched, and I wrapped an arm around him and led him toward the doors. “In the car.”
As we drove towards the compound, I tried to put the last couple of days into words without too much description.
I wasn’t going to tell Chase that Kade couldn’t have kids.
I explained Kade was gun shy over our bonding fully, not going into the reasons why.
The issues with his wolf I played down. Chase gave me an approving look when I told him about our plan to date.
“When will you see him again?” he asked me.
“I’ve got no idea.” I grumbled. “It’s all up to Kade.”
Chase chuckled. “That bond won’t keep you apart long.”
“I’m not sure he can feel it the same way I can.”
“Shit, that sucks bro.”
“Yeah. I just have to have faith in The Luna that she meant us for each other for a reason. Kade is my perfect match, but that also makes me his.”
“Aww, I didn’t know you were such a romantic little brother.”
“Fuck you.”
He just laughed. “So, how do you feel? Partially mated, no longer a virgin, and that floor show we were treated to, that must have opened your eyes, huh?”