Chapter 1 #2
The first meeting between his boss, Shaurya, and the young bureaucrat had taken place about four years ago.
It had been just a week since Shaurya Shekhawat took charge as the Chief Minister of the state.
Congratulations from across the country and abroad had not stopped pouring in even after a week.
Being the youngest person in the country to hold so much power, and one of the very few successful global leaders at that age, had grabbed attention everywhere.
His charismatic personality quickly made him popular among people in and outside India, but he hardly cared about popularity.
As soon as he took charge, he jumped into his responsibilities, and his first task was to reshuffle the bureaucrats.
Though inexperienced, being from a political family and a highly educated intellectual himself, he knew exactly where to begin if he intended to implement powerful reforms.
He had called for a meeting with all the top officials of the state, and that was when he spotted Akash for the first time.
At least, that was what the Chief Minister’s immediate staff believed, including Mr. Naveen Sharma.
From then on, their meetings became frequent—not frequent enough for anyone to raise suspicion, but consistent enough for the senior secretariat staff to assume that Akash was among the few whose work Shaurya valued deeply.
"Where are you going, Mrs. Gupta?" Naveen asked Shweta as she walked toward the CM’s office.
"It's very late. I need to leave, but before that I have to replace Sir’s signboard. He got pretty upset when he found out I sent this one for polishing," Shweta said.
"Oh! I think you should leave, Shweta. The meeting won’t end anytime soon," Mr. Sharma suggested.
"I’ll wait for another 15 minutes, sir," Shweta said, and Naveen nodded.
"Take the government vehicle while you leave," Naveen added.
Shweta nodded in acknowledgment.
She would have left for home already since the issue was quite minor, and Shaurya was usually considerate.
He rarely showed displeasure with any staff member unless it involved carelessness that could affect public service.
But seeing their beloved Chief Minister upset did not sit well with her.
He hardly got upset, so she wanted to replace the signboard before leaving for the day.
So, she waited outside his office for the meeting to end.
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“Any new information on it?” Shaurya asked the man in front of him—Akash Dixit, AIR 7 in his UPSC CSE.
He was widely regarded as highly knowledgeable, a clear example of how age or experience alone could not define capability; it was always about caliber.
At a very young age, he had become one of the most sought-after bureaucrats in the state.
Considering his abilities and commitment to public service, Shaurya had assigned him the responsibility of collecting confidential data related to a sensitive case.
He knew the issue was extremely delicate, and if mishandled, it could destabilize the government despite its record majority, especially since even members within his own party might object to it.
"Yes, sir... I will be submitting a detailed report on it soon," Akash replied sincerely.
"No, don’t do that. Any kind of documentation might put you at risk. Keep the data in the same format as you’ve been maintaining so far," Shaurya said, and Akash nodded.
"Okay, sir. But can I brief you about my recent findings instead, if I don’t document them?" Akash asked politely.
"Of course. Please go ahead," Shaurya said.
The next few hours passed in discussion. They went through the data in depth, forming strategies and analyzing ways to extract further insights. Both men became fully immersed in understanding the situation and strengthening their approach to uncover the ground reality even further.
"Alright, sir, I’ll take your leave now," Akash said, beginning to rise when Shaurya’s next words made him sit back.
"Any news about her?" Shaurya asked.
"I don’t know what you’re talking about, sir," Akash replied, keeping his expression neutral.
Is it possible to love, admire, respect, hate, and feel disgust for the same person at the same time?
If someone had asked Akash this before, he would have laughed and given a straightforward answer—no.
But now, he could no longer say the same.
Because he both loved and hated Shaurya in equal measure, admired him and resented him simultaneously.
"Stop acting oblivious, Akash. You know exactly what I’m asking," Shaurya said, his voice laced with distress.
"Because of you, I lost her too. Why do you think I would tell you anything even if I knew her whereabouts?" Akash replied sharply, his calm facade finally breaking.
"Please, try—" Shaurya began, but stopped when a knock interrupted him.
"Mrs. Gupta? You are still in office?" Shaurya asked in surprise as his personal secretary entered.
"Um... yes, sir. I’m sorry to disturb you," she said hesitantly.
"That’s alright. But what are you doing here this late? You should have left hours ago," he asked.
"I was waiting for you to finish your meeting, sir, so I could replace the signboard," she said, holding it up.
Shaurya’s eyes immediately reflected a sharp, silent pain as he looked at it, though he quickly masked it with his usual calm expression.
"Please place it here and wait outside for me," Shaurya said.
She nodded, still slightly confused, and left the room as instructed.
Shaurya replaced the signboard with the one his secretary had brought.
He slowly wiped it with his handkerchief, his fingers pausing briefly over the extra ‘t’ at the end of his name.
Akash noticed it too and felt a quiet pang of sympathy for him.
He had seen the longing in Shaurya’s eyes for years, but empathy was no longer simple when reality sat so heavily in front of him.
“I’ll take your leave now, sir,” Akash said.
Shaurya nodded.
“Keep up the good work, Akash,” Shaurya said, his tone confident and appreciative.
Akash gave a polite “Thank you,” greeted him, and walked out.
Shaurya’s eyes lingered on the signboard, filled with quiet, agonizing pain and regret as he looked at the bold letters spelling: Shaurya Singh Shekhawatt.
"Do you really want me to add a letter in my name just to get success? Like, are you serious, Akansha?" he asked.
"Arre, trust me. Numerology actually works. Please Shaurya... please please please," she whined.
"Akansha, you’re pursuing a PhD and look at your beliefs," Shaurya teased, and she immediately glared at him.
"What does my education have to do with my belief system, ha? Trust me, this works very well. Please Shaurya..." she pleaded again.
"Fine... I still don’t understand why I agree to you half the time," he said with a frown.
"You agree to me not just half, but all the time," she said proudly.
"That’s true, but I don’t even have a reason for half of it," he argued.
"Well, what’s the reason for the other half?" she asked curiously.
"Because I love you. Simple," he said, making her smile widely.
"I love you too, Shaurya... a lot," she said, rubbing her forehead against his. He leaned in, about to kiss her, when she pulled away.
"Not so soon, Mr. Leader... hold this," she said, handing him a pen. He took it, still frowning at her. She held his palm and made him write his name with an additional ‘T’ at the end.
"I’ve done your naming ceremony again," she said, letting go of his hand. He shook his head at her antics. "From now on, you will use only this wherever you have to write your name. I understand you can’t change official documents, so I’m exempting you from that," she added.
"That’s such a relief. You’re so kind, madam," he teased.
"Shaurya..." she glared at him, but soon broke into laughter when he started tickling her.
"Please don’t punish me more... come back," he whispered to himself, wiping away unshed tears stirred by the memory of his “jaan”—his wife, Akansha Singh Shekhawat.
Life had once felt better than a dream with her, but he had shattered both their lives brutally for his retribution.
Now, only regret remained, slowly killing his soul every passing second.
He walked out and saw Shweta waiting for him.
"I’ll drop you, Mrs. Gupta," Shaurya said.
She was about to protest, but he did not give her a chance.
He gestured for her to walk ahead, and followed behind her.
This quiet respect he showed toward women was exactly what impressed the female staff working with him.
No matter the situation, he never raised his voice at a woman, and his gentleness and chivalrous nature often earned him their silent admiration.
He could have easily arranged for someone else to drop her, but he did not want to take even a 0.1% chance when it came to a woman’s safety. So, he personally ensured she reached home safely in his convoy before heading back to his residence.
And like every day, peaceful sleep remained a distant dream. He could hardly believe he was the same man who once fell asleep instantly after shutting his eyes. But that had been in another life.
Because without peace, how could peaceful sleep ever come to any individual? Shaurya was no exception.