5. James
DING. DING.
The chime of my notifications stirred me awake. My sleep schedule was all types of fucked up. Because I worked the evening and night shifts, I often slept in until one or two o’clock in the afternoon. Today was no different. I’d fallen asleep on the game.
Gaming was the best escape from the long nights I worked.
I could hop on the game and decompress after socializing and being around people for hours on end.
The isolation and freedom to play whatever game I wanted for however long I wanted was a ten out of ten experience.
I could game all night and still get six to eight hours of sleep before the next shift at the club.
I sat up in the chair and picked up my phone. I looked at a couple of the notifications. The group chat with my mother and sister made me roll my eyes.
MAMA:
Good morning and God bless. I pray my kids are doing well because only by the grace of God I can feel their spirits still roaming the living. I haven’t seen my precious gifts from God in months.
Lil Sis:
Mama? You saw me and Rose literally two days ago.
ME:
And you saw me last week. Not to mention I called you a couple of days ago to check in with you.
MAMA:
Lord they are trying to jump me
Lil Sis:
Mama PLEASE. Do you want me to drop off your granddaughter? Will a couple of days with her make it all better?
MAMA:
Yes. Actually.
Lil Sis:
Consider it done. I’ll drop her off after our hair appointments.
ME:
I’ll pull up on my off day. You know I’m busy on the weekends. Wednesday through Sunday I’m up too late.
MAMA:
You need to make time for the woman who brought you into this world, Jay. Every day ain’t promised.
Lil Sis:
Right. Let him know, Mama.
I shook my head at my sister’s instigating ass before I closed the thread and called her on FaceTime. She answered the phone and had her whole forehead in the camera.
“Hey, Jay.”
“Hey, Mama. Are you done being dramatic? I can take you out to eat on Tuesday. Would you like that? Or we can get some groceries and cook together.”
“I’ve been wanting to try to this recipe I had seen on Face Space.”
“Face Space? Mama, I don’t think that’s quite right.”
“Either way, I want to try it and would love if we made it together.”
“Cool. We can make a day of it.”
“God sure answers my prayers. I’ve been missing my son, and he made a way for me to get some of your presence.”
I smiled. “Yeah. I’m gonna get up and get my day started now. I’ll check in with you before I clock in at work.”
“Okay, my son. I love you.”
“I love you too, Mama.”
After I hung up with her, I did my usually tasks: workout, shower, and nap.
As I lay down, awaiting sleep to take me, I pulled out my phone and texted Brielle. We’d been talking for about a week. Our schedules hadn’t aligned yet to allow us an official date, but the time would come eventually. I asked her about her morning and what she planned to do the rest of the day.
Around three, I pulled on my gray sweatpants and a T-shirt, then I left the house to get my SUV detailed.
I rode around in an all-black SUV with gold accents.
My favorite feature was the customized engine I put in there.
My big ass vehicle could hit two hundred on the dash easy.
I could go toe to toe with the luxury shit.
After I checked in my car, I sat in the lobby. I was a faithful customer at the car wash. Me and the owner, Magic, were cool. He always gave me a discount when I pulled up.
I’d been mindlessly scrolling on the internet when I heard her voice. I looked up and my eyes found Brielle almost instantly. She held a long selfie stick as she spoke with Magic.
“Hey, jewels! I’m back with another hidden gem in the city. We’re here today with Magic Montrose at Magic’s Detail. He’s one of the few hand wash car washes in the city and he takes pride in making sure every customer leaves satisfied with their experience.”
Magic grinned as he introduced himself and playfully flirted with her.
I sat back and crossed my arms. I watched her reactions intently.
Despite Magic blatantly flirting with her, she continued to make the interview about his place of business.
Brielle was sunny and energetic. Her aura was attractive as hell.
To see her in her element was beautiful and entertaining.
Brielle naturally attracted me, which was new and kind of terrifying to think about.
The last two or three relationships I’d been in were nothing compared to how I felt about Brielle.
Time after time, I’d opened my heart to a woman only for them to play with my kindness.
Although I’d been hurt numerous times, I still remained open and receptive to falling in love.
“Y’all make sure you come by Magic’s Detail and tell them Jana’s Jewels sent you for a good discount.” Brielle ended the video and retracted the selfie stick.
“I appreciate you for giving my business a spotlight on your platform.”
“Of course. I love supporting Black-owned businesses. I want you to continue to thrive, especially after seeing the shine on my car.”
Magic licked his lips. My foot tapped incessantly on the floor as I watched him try to charm my woman. He placed his hand on her waist, and she respectfully sidestepped him, but I was already up and stalking toward them.
“Yo, James! What’s good, bro?” Magic asked as he saw me approaching.
I nodded and closed the distance between me and Brielle. I cupped her face in my hands and pulled her into a hungry kiss. She held my waist to keep her balance as she kissed me back with the same intensity.
Our first kiss.
The feel of her lips on mine released a calm within my spirt. My soul was content. The possessiveness I felt melted away, and a serene calm engulfed me. Brielle was my peace.
Our lips parted, and her tongue greeted mine. I was about to forget all of my home training and fuck her in the lobby of the car wash. She placed her hands on my chest and pushed me away slightly. I held her in place but removed my mouth from hers.
“Hey, James.”
“Hey, my love.” I grinned as she wiped her lip gloss off my lips.
“This you, bro?” Magic asked.
I nodded. “All me. Yes, sir.”
“Congratulations. You’ve got yourself a good one, brother.” Magic dapped me up.
“Thanks.”
“Let me check on the status of your car. I’ll see you around. Thank you again, Brielle.”
I nodded and stuffed my hands in my pockets while Brielle and Magic exchanged a few more words. Once Magic had walked away, Brielle’s attention returned to me. She squinted her eyes and crossed her arms.
“What the hell was that?” she questioned.
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“Don’t do that, James. You know exactly what the fuck I’m talking about!”
I shrugged. “I tried to stay in my lane, but when I saw him put his hands on you . . . I kind of snapped. I needed to let him know you’re mine.”
“You ruined our first kiss. You literally threw a tantrum like a child instead of trusting me to put that nigga in his place. Why would you make our first kiss in this fuckin’ car wash? That’s not romantic at all.” She pouted her lips and stomped her feet.
“You’re cute when you’re upset.”
“James!”
“I know, baby. I’m not invalidating your feelings. I apologize for not making our first kiss more special.”
“I’m so upset with you.”
“How can I make it up to you?” I asked as I placed my hands on her waist. She wore a cute jean and tank top combination that showed off all her curves in the best way.
“You better plan the best date of my life. I want our first date to be magical . . . no pun intended.” She giggled as I guffawed at her corny joke.
“I’m gon’ let you make it because I like you, but do not get a job as a comedian. Content is your thing fa sho though.”
“You know what you sound like?” she asked.
“A man who gon’ always keep it real with you.”
“No. A hater. A prime time, grade A, hater.”
“I can’t control how you feel.”
She rolled her eyes and playfully swatted at my chest. “You are annoying. You know that?”
“My sister tells me all the time.”
“Good. She sounds like a smart woman.”
“You can decide for yourself when y’all meet.”
“Oop. I hope not any time soon.”
“Why not? You’re going to love my family.”
“That may be so, but I think that’s a milestone that comes further down the line. I mean, we haven’t even gone on our first date.”
“It’ll all fall into place in God’s timing. We’re both busy people, but we’ll find time in our busy schedules to prioritize falling in love.”
“The effort you put into making me feel wanted and appreciated isn’t going unnoticed. Thank you for that.”
“Thank you for letting me have the space to do it. You’re receptive to my fast-paced way of loving.”
“It’s my favorite genre of romance. I love a good love at first sight story to fall deeply in love with. To live it in my real life is kind of crazy, but I’m going to be open to all the love you want to give me.”
“Good.”
I leaned down to give her another kiss. This one wasn’t as hungry and possessive. This kiss was gentle, warm, and peaceful. Her lips gave me solace, comfort, and joy.
Monday
“The recipe says we need to use jerk seasoning, but I’m not a fan of those spicy flavors. We can substitute it for a more subtle Cajun spice.”
Mama read the ingredients on her shopping list as I followed beside her. I picked up everything she called out to me and listened as she told me about different things happening in her life.
“Did I tell you about Miss Ronda’s daughter?” she asked as we made our way through the store.
“Nah. What’s going on with them?”
She shook her head. “Chile, she’s back in jail after she attempted to kill her boyfriend for cheating on her.”
“That’s crazy. Cheating on a woman who has been locked up before is diabolical. That nigga must ain’t care about his life for real.”
“James, please.”
“I’m just saying.”
Mama chuckled. “I will say I’m glad you didn’t listen to me when I told you to give the girl a chance. The Lord knew not to bring that type of psycho into our family.”
“I never listen to any of y’all when y’all try to hook me up with someone.”
“Well, your track record ain’t the best. What ever happened to that last girl you were so in love with?”
Her question made me laugh. “She should have her baby soon.”
“Huh? I’ve got another grandbaby on the way?”
“Hell naw. She got knocked up and didn’t know who the father was. She tried to pin a pregnancy on me that didn’t fit the timeline. Ain’t no way she is four months pregnant, two months into us dating. I cut her off as soon as she tried to put another man’s baby on me.”
Mama shook her head. “Messy. Messy. Messy.”
“Yup. That’s why I was cool on dating for a long time.”
“Until?”
I raised an eyebrow. “What?”
“There felt like you were holding something back with that statement. You were cool on dating until . . .”
I scratched the back of my neck. “Until I met Brielle.”
“Oooh! Who’s Brielle?”
I pulled out my phone and opened the text thread between me and my lady.
I went to the attachments and scrolled to one of my favorite pictures of Brielle.
She was outside with the natural light beaming on her beautiful, makeup free face.
She wore her favorite wig with a strapless dress.
Her skin was breathtaking in the picture, and I was confident Mama would agree.
“Her.” I held the phone out. “But don’t swipe. You gon’ see some things you don’t need to see.”
“Lord . . .” She lifted the phone up to get a good look at the image. She examined it and smiled. “She’s pretty. What’s the story there?”
“I met her at that block party that got shot up last summer.”
“Oh dear.”
“Yeah. It was crazy. We headed to the food trucks together when a couple of gangbangers got into it. I protected her through it all and stayed with her when she found out her best friend passed.” I explained the full extent of what we’d been through and how our paths crossed again a few weeks back at the club.
“You’re your father’s son, for sure.” Mama shook her head as we made our way to the checkout line.
“What do you mean?” I lifted all our items onto the conveyor belt.
“Your daddy was a love at first sight kind of guy too. He loved so intensely it was almost scary.”
“I didn’t know that. It makes sense though. This trait is built deep in my blood.”
“We met at Cassandra’s. He was a busser while I was out on a date.
My date had spilled his glass of wine, and when your dad came to clean it up, he literally told the guy he’d pay the tab if he let him take his place at the table.
We’d already eaten and were just chatting, but that nigga agreed.
Your dad sat in that booth with me for hours.
Telling me how much he loved everything about me, from my hair to my shoes. He made me feel special.”
No matter how many times she shared the story, I always listened like it was the first time she’d shared.
They were the blueprint for how I loved and wanted to be loved.
Society and social media made it seem like two parent, African American households were toxic and damaging to the Black community.
They made it seem like Black men didn’t have good role models to look up to besides niggas who played sports or niggas in the music industry.
Jeremiah Hill was a caring, yet strict, father.
He wasn’t afraid to love his family out loud.
That came from being raised by Jeb Hill, a man who grew up during segregation and the height of racism in America.
Seeing loved ones lynched and beaten for existing while Black made him affectionate toward his family.
A lot of men were taught to hide their emotions because they were a sign of weakness. My father and grandfather taught me how to use my emotions to make the best decisions. A well balanced and loving home was what I strived to give my future kids.
With Brielle, God willing.