Chapter 20
The alpha must have unpacked his things, because Thorn was lying on top of a familiar fur blanket when he woke a few days later. The fire was still going, or maybe it’d been restarted, he couldn’t recall. For a long while, he lay there, staring at the dancing flames.
He wasn’t brave enough to explore his emotions, so he locked those down and focused on taking stock of his physical form instead. There were the usual aches and pains that came from a thorough and lengthy fucking, but aside from that, he didn’t seem to be suffering from any serious damage.
At least, that’s what he thought, until he lifted himself into a seated position and felt the skin on the left side of his neck protest.
Hissing, he touched it before he could help himself, bracing for more pain at the contact, but it wasn’t as bad as he’d feared. There was a piece of smooth material over the area which he recognized as second-skin, a bandage that would help keep the wound clean while it healed.
He’d have a scar though. A symbol of ownership. Proof that he had an alpha.
His fingers traced the indents beneath the bandage, just barely able to make them out, but then movement from the corner of his eye caught his attention, and he turned his head to find Baal standing by the window.
The alpha had on a white pair of sweatpants, also something he had to have fished out of one of the boxes, and was staring out the window at the front yard. He’d cracked it, but only enough for the waft of smoke trailing from the end of his cigarette to be swept outside.
Thorn had only ever seen him smoke once or twice and frowned.
“Disappointed to find I’m still here?” Baal’s voice was low, edged with displeasure.
“Alpha.” Thorn didn’t know what to say. He knew what he wanted, but…Did he dare hope? His fingers pressed against the claiming mark.
The silence was sickening, but he didn’t dare break it, waiting for the alpha to finish his cigarette.
Baal flicked the bud out the window and then shut it, angling his body somewhat toward where Thorn still sat on the floor. “Sorry.”
For not leaving or…Oh. Thorn dropped his gaze.
“Because you regret it.” He didn’t even have the strength to brush the tear away as it fell.
“No.” Baal approached, crouching at his side. His hand slipped beneath Thorn’s jaw and tipped his face up. “Because I don’t.”
He inhaled sharply.
“The plan was always for you to end up here, omega. Bearing my mark. Did you really think you could pack up all my things and be rid of me? Have you forgotten the part in our contract where you aren’t allowed to walk away?
” He pinched Thorn’s chin and lifted his head even higher.
“I thought if I courted you properly, you would learn to want me back. I see now that was wishful thinking.”
“It…wasn’t.” Thorn licked his lips when Baal’s eyes widened slightly.
“Don’t mess with me right now. I’m warning you. That claiming mark is permanent. Whether you like it or not, you belong to me now.”
“Do you mean it?” Hope was starting to seep its way past Thorn’s defenses, his stubbornness no match for the warmth spreading through him. “You meant to give me the bite? It wasn’t just because you were delirious in the midst of a rut? You wanted—”
“I’ve always wanted this with you.” The alpha gave him an incredulous look. “Was that not obvious?”
Maybe it really had been, and his brother was right about that as well.
“I think I was too scared,” Thorn admitted. “If I looked too closely and misinterpreted things, and it later turned out to be all in my head…I couldn’t risk that.”
Baal’s hold on him softened some. “Why not?”
“Because I…” Screw it. He’d already been bitten. If they couldn’t be honest with each other now, they never would be. “I think I may be at least somewhat in love with you, and if you didn’t feel the same way—” The air whooshed out of him, and he found himself on his back yet again.
The alpha set a forearm at either side of Thorn’s head, caging him in, so the only place he was able to look was straight ahead, directly at those blue eyes he’d become so fond of.
“I’ll let the uncertainty slide,” Baal told him. “But just to be clear, of course I love you, frosty omega. Would I have wasted all my efforts like this if I didn’t?”
“Do you?”
“Yes.” His gaze dropped to the mark. “Maybe I should have bitten you at the cabin and avoided all of this.”
“No,” Thorn said. “I would have hated you.”
He stared down at him. “You know I’ve been playing your emotions, trying to get the reaction I desired.”
“Yes.”
“You don’t feel cheated?”
“Was it hard being nice to me?” Thorn countered. “Did you struggle thinking of kind things to say, gifts to send?”
“Don’t be absurd.”
“Exactly.” Now that his eyes were truly open, Thorn could look back on all of their memories and see the sincerity in every gesture.
“If you’d forced yourself to pretend to be someone you’re not, told me things you didn’t mean, gave me things for the hell of it, then yeah, that would have been purely manipulative. But that wasn’t the case.”
“I’m not a good person, sweetheart.”
“You’re not a terrible one either.” He shrugged. “But it doesn’t matter either way.”
“No?”
He shook his head. “My brother told me I’d be an idiot to give you up.”
“Ah, so you’re only deciding to be with me for Aster’s sake.”
Thorn rose and brushed his lips against the alpha’s.
“No one’s ever taken care of me before. No one has texted in the middle of the day just to tell me they miss me.
I spent all my time keeping my family afloat.
I don’t even remember when I used this fireplace last before you came along. I don’t want a baby, Baal.”
He cupped the alpha’s face in both hands when he went to pull away.
“I don’t want to share you. I want all of your attention solely on me.
I want your ruts and your knots, and I want to be able to fuck you whenever we feel like it, and not have to worry about sneaking off and doing it behind locked doors and between PTA meetings. Is that okay? Can I be selfish?”
Lots of people loved having big families and children, and that was great for them. But that wasn’t the future he dreamed of.
“For once in your life?” the alpha chuckled. “Yeah, omega. Yeah, you definitely can be.”
“Void the contract,” Thorn said.
“It’s not necessary anymore,” he replied. “However, that does mean all our agreed-upon terms are null.”
“What do you mean?”
“A claimed omega can’t live separately from his alpha. As soon as the blizzard passes, we’re moving you into the manor. No arguing. Think it through, sweetheart. It’s the best way to guarantee you’re able to get everything on your list.”
“List?”
“Fucking me whenever you want?” He smirked devilishly. “Aster might not be a baby, but that hardly means I want him walking in on me pounding his big brother’s tight ass.”
Thorn’s lips twisted in disgust.
“See what I mean?” Baal laughed. “The manor is huge. Plenty of room for all of us to live comfortably together without having to be on top of one another. Although,” he motioned to their current position, “you can expect to find yourself underneath me often.”
“What if I want to be on top?” he teased.
“Then I’ll roll over and you can ride me to your heart's content.” The alpha sobered some. “My job is dangerous. The White Frost has many enemies. But I promise I’ll always protect you and Aster. I’ll keep you safe, and I’ll let you do the one thing you’ve been unknowingly craving to do for years.”
“What’s that?”
“I’ll let you live your life,” Baal said. “For yourself.”
“And my alpha.” He smiled.
“I wouldn’t hate being included.”
Thorn wasn’t going to give this place up, but he could see the logic in Baal’s suggestion. With Aster set to return soon, it made sense for them to move somewhere with more space where he could further adjust.
“Stop thinking about all of the ways this will benefit your brother,” the alpha scolded. “I just made you the third most powerful member of the mafia. Don’t you have questions?”
He wasn’t sure being the mate of the underboss automatically made him a powerful member of the White Frost, but that was neither here nor there.
Thorn didn’t have any more interest in the mafia than he had at the start of all of this.
The only member he cared about was the one who’d swept him off his feet, both literally and figuratively.
“I’m sure I will,” he said. “But they can wait.”
“You can’t possibly be suggesting we have sex right now. Aren’t you still sore?”
“Are you saying you don’t want to?”
“Omega.”
“As long as you go slow, I should be fine.”
Baal clicked his tongue and stood, pulling Thorn off the ground as well, only to turn and deposit him onto the couch. He laughed when Thorn pursed his lips. “Don’t pout. We’re going to be trapped here for a while. We can afford to pace ourselves.”
“Huh?” Thorn stood and glanced out the window, noticing the snow came almost all the way up to the bottom of the ledge. The storm was still raging, and their cars were nothing more than mountains of white in the driveaway. “Shit.”
“It’s a good thing you have an alpha who doesn’t just think about keeping your hole full.” Baal ambled into the kitchen. “The fridge is stocked, so we’ll be fine here. The only thing is you’ll have to wait for your flowers. No delivery service will make it in this weather.”
Thorn shifted on the cushions so he could watch the alpha as he moved about the kitchen, getting things out to make breakfast. “What’s with the flowers, anyway?”
“You don’t like them?”
“I do.”
“White roses symbolize new beginnings,” he explained. “They always made me think of you. Of the life I hoped we’d one day share.”
“I thought for sure you were going to say because they’re covered in thorns.”
“That too.” Baal cracked a couple of eggs into a pan and then came back over while they started to cook.
Resting his palms against the armrest, he leaned over the couch and gave Thorn a kiss that was over far too quickly.
“Tell me you meant everything you said. That you aren’t secretly angry I forced the bite, and you aren’t biding your time until I’m not looking. ”
“I won’t run. I think you make me happy.”
“More uncertainty.” He scoffed. “So stubborn.”
“I’ll work on it,” he promised. It’d always been easier to pretend the good and the bad away, it was how he kept focused on the tasks at hand. How he kept himself moving forward, by only looking straight ahead and not allowing himself any types of distractions.
That might no longer be necessary, but it would take him a while to adjust to this new way of living. To not having to consider every detail down to the last coin and to listen to his own wants and desires instead of pushing those voices down and silencing them.
The eggs began to sizzle.
“Tell me you’re mine, omega.” Baal lingered.
“I’m yours,” he replied. “And you’re mine. My alpha.”
Baal grinned, his elation palpable.
“My alpha,” Thorn drawled, “who’s burning breakfast.”
With a curse, he spun around and rushed back into the kitchen.
Thorn laughed and watched him prepare the meal, welcoming that contentment he’d been so afraid of only a few days ago.
He could get used to this.
Used to life with his alpha.