Chapter 22
22
LINCOLN
T he loud thump of music sounds along with the thundering heartbeat in my chest as I watch my marketing executive put his hand on her waist. I don’t know what compelled me to come here tonight. I heard Morgan talking about it, heard about this guy who had the hots for my assistant. But I should have left it alone.
She can do whatever she wants. I’m the one who ended it. Yet here I am, powerless to these feelings that come alive when I think about her.
Her eyes meet mine from across the room, and time stands still. I have no plan. I can’t exactly barge in and claim her as mine in front of my employees.
Instead, I grab a drink at the bar and watch. She’s the only one who seems to notice that I’m here as her eyes move to mine every few seconds. My jaw tics with bitterness and regret every time he leans in to whisper in her ear or puts his hand too close to her ass.
I can tell she isn’t comfortable. I have to talk myself down from stepping in and beating him to a pulp. When I see her giving Morgan a hug, I throw a fifty down on the bar and wait. She waves goodbye to everyone and walks out the door, her eyes holding mine the entire time.
I follow her outside.
She spins on her heel immediately. “What the hell are you doing here, Lincoln?”
I stiffen, momentarily abashed. “I was just making sure you were okay.”
Her eyes convey the fire within. “Bullshit. You were spying on me.”
“ Spying is a strong word,” I say irritably.
“It is a strong word and an accurate one for what you were doing. What’s wrong with you? You end things with us, but you can’t handle that another man might want me?”
Her accusatory words pierce me with their accuracy.
I take a step until I crowd her space. “Fine. You want the truth? Yes, I can’t handle the idea of you with another man. I was clouded with jealousy in there. I could barely breathe, thinking of his hands all over you.”
“Ugh, you are so confusing!” she screams.
“Just … come home with me,” I suggest. “Please. I want to talk.”
Her eyes squint at me. “You think I want to come back to your place?”
“Please,” I beg. “I want to talk about this, but not here, with all these people around us.”
Her head falls back as she huffs out a breath. “Fine!”
Instant relief fills my body. I walk her over to my car and open the door.
“You can take us to my place, George.”
“Yes, sir. Hello, Miss Ricci.” George smiles in the mirror back at Kylie.
“Hi, George. Thank you for the ride.”
He chuckles. “It’s my job, but also my pleasure.”
I watch the exchange she has with my driver and realize that not one single woman I’ve had in the back of this car has thanked George for a ride. They all walk around like the world owes them these luxuries. Kylie is different. In so many ways, she is the opposite from every woman I’ve been with.
I think that’s what I like about her. She’s real. She isn’t impressed by my money or power. In fact, she seems annoyed by it most of the time. She’s been through hell and back in life, and she knows what’s truly important.
I don’t understand how she didn’t let all of it jade her. Life certainly has made me see the world in gray instead of vivid colors. Sometimes, when I’m around Kylie, I feel like the colors start to appear back into my vision. It’s both thrilling and terrifying.
When we get to my penthouse, I open another Italian bottle of wine and offer her a glass.
“Thank you,” she says as she takes the glass.
The brush of our fingers sends electricity buzzing through me. I wish I could pull her against me and get a taste of her lips. It hasn't been a week, and I miss them.
She turns away quickly. I wonder if she felt it too.
“I need to call my brother first,” she tells me.
“How are things going with him? Is he adjusting okay to you staying out and working longer hours?” I ask, suddenly worried I’ve occupied too much of her time.
She smiles. “No, he tells me I’ve hovered over him enough. He likes the space. He joined a basketball team and even asked me to stop calling him by his nickname.”
“You don’t look too thrilled about that,” I point out as she grabs her phone out of her purse.
“It’s just hard to see him growing up. I know I need to let him, but it’s been the two of us since our parents died. I’ll be right back.”
She leaves the room to call her brother, and I take a seat on my couch. My hands are sweating. Shit, why am I so nervous? I feel like I’m about to ask a girl to prom. What am I exactly planning on doing here? Am I going to ask her to … date me?
She comes back in the room a minute later and takes a seat next to me. “Sorry about that.”
“No problem. Is he okay?” I ask.
“Yes, he’s fine. He said he’s tired from basketball. He’s just going to eat some leftover pizza and head to bed.”
“Glad to hear it.” I take a sip of wine and watch her.
She sits stiffly in front of me as her fingers tap against her glass impatiently. She won’t look at me, but I can’t take my eyes off of her. The space between us feels tense but also charged with heat.
“I’m sorry,” I find myself saying, not able to really remember the last time I apologized to anyone other than this woman.
She finally looks over at me. “You could have apologized outside of the bar. You didn’t need to do that here. Why’d you drag me all the way to your place?”
“I suppose it was a selfish motivation. I just saw you with him and needed to get you away from there.”
“What I do and who I do it with is none of your business,” she snaps.
I wince at her words, but she’s right. It’s not my business. Not anymore.
“I thought I was doing the right thing—ending things between us. I thought it would be easier.”
“And is it?” she asks softly.
“No,” I answer reluctantly. “It’s not easier.”
She shakes her head but doesn’t say anything back. We sit in silence and drink our wine.
“I didn’t realize I’d feel this way,” I whisper eventually.
She looks over at me. “What way?”
I meet her eyes. “I didn’t know I’d like you.”
“Like me? Like me, as in you don’t mind having me around?”
“More than that. I caught feelings. It took me by surprise. When I realized it, I got spooked and ended it.”
Her eyes open wide. “You have feelings for me?”
I chuckle softly as I look down into my wineglass as a distraction for talking about something that makes me so uneasy. “You seem so surprised.”
“I didn’t know you were capable of feelings.”
Another moment of pure honesty from her.
My head cranes to look at her again. “I didn’t know I was capable of them either.”
Her throat moves as she swallows. “What does this mean?”
I feel my pulse in my neck as my mouth goes dry. “I think I want to date.”
“You … want to date … me?” she says as her voice goes higher.
“Why is the idea so crazy to you?” I ask slightly defensively.
“Because you’re”—she looks me up and down—“you. You’re rich, handsome, smart, powerful. I’ve seen the women you date. They’re like supermodels. I’m just some poor assistant who had to lie to get her job.”
My head falls to the side as I take in her words. She doesn’t get it. She doesn’t see what I see in her. What other men all around see in her.
I scoot forward on the couch and take her face into my hands. “Don’t fucking talk about yourself like that. Those women you speak of, the ones I used to date, do you have any idea how empty they made me feel? All they cared about was what my money could buy them. You … you don’t look at me like an ATM,” I tell her, voice thick with emotion.
I continue, “You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever met. Inside and out. I’m so blown away by how you’ve handled the cards life dealt you. You’ve been through ten times more than I have in life, and yet you still give grace to everyone. You believe in a happy world. I’m jealous of how strong you are.”
Her eyes glisten with moisture. “That’s the nicest thing anybody has ever said to me.” Her voice shakes with emotion.
I should say more, tell her more, give her all the compliments in the world that will make her see how special she is, but all I can do is kiss her. The moment our lips meet, the world spins. I open my mouth and touch our tongues together gently. We take our time, exploring this kiss that’s filled with the promise of more.
She pulls away, and her innocent eyes meet mine. “Let’s go to your bedroom.”
Before I can slow things down, she’s standing and pulling me down the hallway. We walk into my room, and she turns to me.
“We don’t have to do anything tonight,” I tell her. “That’s not the reason I brought you back here. Plus, you’ve got your brother at home.”
She sits on my bed and scoots back until her head falls down on my pillow. She looks like an angel on my bed with the city lights surrounding her. My mouth goes dry, and I swallow to try and find some moisture to help me speak.
“I want you to have sex with me tonight,” she whispers. “Take my virginity.”
My breath catches in my throat. I’m stuck in my spot, completely unable to move. I am normally such a calculated person. I make decisions carefully and thoughtfully. I consider all my avenues. It’s what has gotten me to the top.
Now, here I am, feeling completely out of control.
“Kylie … I don’t—I don’t expect you to do this yet,” I whisper as my hands bunch into fists at my sides as she lies in front of me with all the trust in the world.
“Lincoln,” she cuts me off, “I know you don’t expect me to. I want to. I’ve thought about this for so long. I want it to be with you.”
She stretches her arm out for me to join her. Despite my heart feeling like it might explode out of my chest, I kick off my shoes and join her on the bed. When I lie on my side, she mirrors me, and we both stare at each other.
I trace her forehead, then her cheek with my fingers. Then I pull on her bottom lip. My dick already hurts with how hard it is at just the thought of being with her.
“I don’t want you to regret it,” I admit, my fear taking over. “That would kill me.”
She leans in and kisses me gently. “I need you to trust that I can make my own decisions. I’ve been doing it my entire life. Do you want to have sex with me?”
I hear the doubt in her voice. I can’t believe she thinks she even needs to ask that.
“It’s all I’ve thought about since the first day I met you,” I admit.
“Do you have any condoms?” she asks.
I nod my head in response.
“Then please,” she says softly as she takes my hand and rests it on her stomach, “I need this. I need to feel like a real woman.”
I cover her mouth with my lips, devouring its softness. Her hands instantly reach for the back of my head and run through my hair as I shift my weight on top of her, pressing the evidence of my arousal onto her thigh.
My lips sear a path down her neck to her shoulders. I drag them over to her chest then reach for the buttons on her blouse and work them down until she can pull her arms out of the sleeves. I throw it off the bed onto the floor and continue my featherlike kisses just under her bra.
I can feel her chest move up and down as her breathing quickens.
There’s so much said between us in the silence. The understanding of what we are about to exchange. How our relationship with each other will be forever changed.
I continue down to her pants, then look up at her. With one hand, I snap her button open and drag down her zipper. Just seeing her white lace panties. It’s like the color she picked out this morning was signifying what we were about to do together tonight. I settle onto my knees and use both hands to pull down her black pants.
“You’re breathtaking,” I say as my eyes rake down her body.
My hands slide up her silken belly until they reach her breasts, and then I move them behind her. She arches her back to give me room to snap her bra open. I gently pull the straps over her shoulders and drag the material down her arms. Her bra joins the rest of her clothing on my floor.
The process of slowly and tenderly undressing someone like this is far more erotic than I thought it could ever be. I don’t ever make love. I fuck. I fuck hard and fast. This is new ground for me, but I’m finding it to be surprisingly hot.
My hands circle her breasts and squeeze them lightly. She bites her tongue when my thumbs move over her nipples. I smirk at how sensitive she is and how obvious it is when I do something she likes. I lean forward and let my tongue caress her swollen nipple. Her whimpers and moans make my dick beg to join in.
I move my mouth down her abdomen, giving small kisses and licks until I reach her thigh. I remove her panties and settle in on my elbows.
“I’m going to get you nice and wet so you’re ready for me,” I tell her.
I lean forward and lick from her ass up to her clit.
“Ahh, I don’t think you’re going to have a problem with that,” she breathes heavily.
I smile. She’s right about that. She is soaking wet. There’s already a spot on my sheets.
“Let’s stretch you out a bit,” I whisper over her clit, then begin to suck on it. I bring my pointer finger up to her opening and start to circle it around, teasing the possibility before I insert it.
Her pussy is so tight. It has a death grip on my finger. I move my finger along the walls of her pussy as I try to work it open for me, all the while keeping my tongue on her clit to keep her loose and relaxed for me.
“Oh gosh,” she whispers as she watches. “You’re so big, Lincoln. Do you think you’re actually going to fit?”
As I work one finger inside of her, I have doubts myself, but I don’t show it. “Of course, baby. We’re going to make it fit because no one else gets to do this to you but me. Do you hear me?”
She nods her head, and I flick my tongue harder on her clit. I push in my middle finger to join my other one.
Fuck, I’m gonna come instantly if I get my dick in here. She’s so damn tight.
After I do a couple more circles on her pussy, I pull my fingers out and rise up to my hands. I look up at her beautiful, trusting face.
“Are you ready, baby?”
“Yes,” she whispers with a dash of hesitation.
I lean forward, open the drawer on my nightstand, and pull out a condom. In order to distract her from her nerves, I get on my knees between her legs and hand her the condom. “Here. Put it on me.”
Her eyes open wide at me. “You want me to do it?”
I nod my head. She rips open the wrapper and pulls the condom out.
“Just put it at the tip and roll it down,” I tell her.
Her eyebrows furrow as she concentrates. I want to smirk, but then her hands touch my already-throbbing dick, and I groan. She rolls it down slowly, just like I instructed.
“Good girl,” I whisper.
I bend down and rest my hands on the bed as I bring our bodies together, resting mine on top of hers gently. For a moment, we just look into each other’s eyes. I try to throttle the dizzying current racing through me. Our lips brush over each other’s as we steal the other’s breath before coming together in a searing kiss. I feel the movement of her body from her breathing.
With one hand, I reach down and grab my dick, then place it at her wet entrance. I start to rub it up and down, coating it in her wetness.
“Are you ready?” I ask.
“I’m ready,” she replies softly.
I settle myself at her entrance and then lean back down so I can be close to her. Slowly, I push the tip in until I feel her warmth surround me.
I grunt and swear at the same time she gasps—our reactions for two entirely different reasons. I look at her to make sure she’s okay. My heart is thundering in my chest at how intense the moment is.
“I’m going to push in a bit more. Okay?” I ask.
“Mmhmm,” she replies.
I push in carefully until I’ve fed her another inch. Her face contorts into a slight grimace at the intrusion. I hate that I’m hurting her, yet I still can’t control how fucking incredible it feels at the same time. Pushing in another inch or two, I feel that I’ve reached her barrier.
“I need a second,” she breathes.
I lean down and kiss her, stroking my tongue against hers until I feel her muscles loosen for me. “Just tell me when you’re ready,” I whisper against her lips.
We get lost in our kisses for a minute before she stops.
“Okay. I’m ready for more.”
I look down at her. “This next part is going to hurt.”
She dips her head in understanding. I swallow tightly as I thrust my hips forward, and my dick breaks through and slides in the rest of the way until it’s completely gripped by her pussy. My heart thunders in my ears as it feels like all my blood rushes to my dick.
“Fuck,” I growl as my forehead falls to her shoulder, and she lets out a small cry.
I leave my head down as I try to gain control back, but it feels impossible. I’m completely lost in the moment, lost in the intensity of my feelings.
“I’m okay,” she whispers. “You can move again.”
“I’m not sure I’m okay,” I say in return.
As I pull out and sink back into her, a sharp breath leaves my lips—a mix of pure pleasure and something I don’t dare name. She’s so tight; every tremble that she releases around my dick ignites a primal possessiveness in me. I watch her expression shift from one of discomfort to pleasure as her body opens to me. Her jaw falls as my dick moves in and out of her.
I push in until I bottom out and then move my hips around to hit that spot.
She gasps, “Lincoln, oh my God.”
I rest my forehead on hers and keep moving, knowing I’m hanging on by a thread. “I know. Do you think you can come for me?”
“I think so,” she exhales. “Shit. Yes. I’m almost there.”
“Fuck, baby. I’m so close,” I grunt as I pick up the pace.
I feel her walls choke my cock as she comes all over me. The flood of her release does me in, my thrusts getting jerky as I’m taken over the edge with her. I fall on top of her and rest my head on the pillow with her as we breathe together in complete and utter satisfaction.