Twenty-Five
Asia
The weight of expectation was heavy, but I knew what I had to do.
For some reason these people looked to me.
I wouldn’t fail them.
I met Jack’s gaze. “We should stay here.”
I didn’t whisper it, didn’t hedge.
My knees felt like water, but I spoke the words with complete confidence.
The silence after was heavy, stretched taut between us like a live wire. I was vaguely aware of the others, but I was completely focused on Jack .
Before, when it was just Jack and I, speaking up was easy. The others added a different element and this moment was an inflection point. The fork in the road where things diverged from what was before to what they could be now.
Jack’s gaze was intense enough to set me on fire, and I shivered.
And not just with discomfort.
This wasn’t the time or the place, but I couldn’t help but think about how he looked at me the same way as he held me in his arms.
He looked at me like I was a puzzle he was determined to solve, and I had no doubt that he could.
“I thought we were sticking to the plan,” Jack finally said.
His voice was even, but I didn’t fall for it.
It was a challenge, and if I wasn’t careful, Jack would have me twisted in knots and not sure which way was up.
I broke Jack’s gaze and looked at the others.
Weak, I knew, but I needed a second to gather myself.
Lourdes watched me. Miles did too, from where he hovered near his sister like her shadow. Elliot looked like he wanted to teleport straight through the floor, and Bridget didn’t really seem to be there at all.
Caitlin? She undressed Jack with her eyes, her lust for him impossible to miss.
I understood.
And tried to ignore the irritation crawling at the base of my neck.
I never fought over a man and never fucking would, but God if Caitlin didn’t make me want to change that rule, if only to prove a point.
My annoyance with Caitlin was just the thing I needed to get me back on track and ready to face Jack.
“We are sticking with the plan. But we need a minute to breathe and figure things out. There are more of us now. We can’t just move like we did before.”
“More complications.” Jack skewered me with a piercing gaze so intense, my heart raced.
But I didn’t look away.
He didn’t, either, and his eyes told me this conversation was far from over.
Caitlin cleared her throat, breaking the spell .
I wanted to thank her, which only proved how much the world had changed.
Jack gave me one more look and then turned to Miles.
“Know how to use a hammer, kid?”
Miles swallowed hard as his eyes bugged out. But he was such a great kid, and fast on his feet, too. “Not really, but I can learn.”
Jack nodded. Just a flick of his head, but I saw it.
None of the anger I’d seen in his eyes before was there now. Instead, he looked at Miles with approval.
That meant something.
Jack didn’t hand out praise like candy—so when it came, it hit different. And I could tell Miles felt that when he stood a little taller and looked Jack in the eye.
“Good,” Jack said. Then he turned his attention to the others.
“If we’re going to stay here, we need to get this place in better shape.
Bridget and Lourdes, check the kitchen. Quick and quiet.
Find anything useful. Asia, you and Caitlin take stock of other supplies. Elliot, you’re with me at the door. ”
Elliot perked up. “I saw some boards outside.”
Jack stopped midstride and shook his head. “No. No one leaves this building. We’ll use the tables. Push them against the glass. It won’t be perfect, but it’s something. Kid, find garbage bags and tape and cover those windows. That film on the outside gives us some cover, but more won’t hurt.”
I’d noticed the restaurant’s opaque, ugly-ass windows. I remembered then how hard it was to see inside the restaurant from the outside. But Jack’s plan made sense.
They usually did.
After a beat, we all moved, everyone set off on their tasks, the most important of which was survival. Caitlin and I stood side by side as we rummaged through another supply closet that smelled like old fryer grease and sour mop water.
“Looks like you got lucky. Again,” Caitlin said a few minutes after we entered the closet, her voice low and clipped.
“Or maybe I made my own luck.”
I kept at my task and didn’t look at her and shouldn’t even have said that much .
Caitlin’s problem with me was just that. Caitlin’s problem.
I had other shit to worry about, and if Caitlin had any sense—a questionable proposition to say the least—she would, too.
She chuckled, and I looked over at her. “Found these.” She held up a six pack of lighters, the long kind with a trigger. Her smile faltered for half a second, like she wanted to say something more. Then it was gone, her usual edge back in place.
“Good find.” I smiled at her.
She shrugged, her hand drifting up to touch her hair, and then smiled back. “Not quite the way we expected to end up when we were 1Ls, is it?”
I laughed, remembering the first time Caitlin and I bumped heads during our first year of law school. She’d hid a book in the library, and I called her on it. Things went downhill from there. “No, but I’d definitely rather be in the stacks than playing survivalist. But here we are.”
She looked at me again, and something in her expression shifted. She gave me a smile, a real one for once. And for just a second, it felt like things could be okay.
Caitlin turned, and we went back to our task, the silence now its own truce.
I found another pack of lighters and a flashlight that flickered on when I banged it against a shelf.
There was also a three pack of plastic table cloths wrapped in packaging that smelled like mold.
I kept it anyway, hoping the cloths inside would be intact.
We piled the find in a cardboard box that was still dry and left. Caitlin was in front of me as Lourdes trailed out of the kitchen, her eyes locked on mine.
I let Caitlin get a little farther away and then went to Lourdes.
Before I could speak, she said, “You okay?”
Tears sprang up before I could blink, but I swallowed them back. She didn’t miss them, though. She smiled softly and then handed me a travel pack of wipes. “It looks dusty in there. You can clean up with these.”
“Thank you,” I said as I gave her a hug.
Lourdes was always kind, and seeing that something of the world survived had me close to tears again. I stepped back, but Lourdes reached out for my hand and squeezed, saying so much without words.
The moment was short-lived.
Without even turning, I felt Jack’s presence, and when I turned, he was there.
Lourdes moved past me quickly, looking nervously at Jack before she went back to the dining area.
I breathed deep to prepare myself but was still surprised at the intensity in his gaze.
“I need a word.” He didn’t wait for me to respond before he grabbed my elbow and marched into the storeroom.
My pulse throbbed at my neck, and I glared at Jack.
“Do you have something to say, Jackson?”
He didn’t respond right away.
Just stood there with his locked jaw and burning stare, the silence louder than shouting would have been.
“Go ahead,” I snapped.
“You shouldn’t have let them in,” he ground out, his voice was low, rough.
It sent a chill down my spine that had nothing to do with fear.
I fought that feeling back and focused on the matter at hand. Jack had held his tongue, but I’d known this conversation was coming. Best to get it done. “We went over this, Jackson. They’re people, Jack. Good people. They needed help.”
The muscle in his jaw ticked faster with every word I said. “That’s exactly why you shouldn’t have let them in. Because you can’t keep that bleeding heart of yours in check long enough to see it might get you killed. Get me killed.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. Is a little human compassion inconvenient for you?” I took a step closer. I hated how small my voice sounded, but my anger carried it. “Not everything is a tactical calculation, Jack.”
“Out there, it is. If you forget that, even for a second, you die. Or worse.” His voice dropped, eyes boring into mine. “And leave me to clean up your mess.”
I breathed out hard. “So that’s what I am? A mess to clean up?”
His hand shot out, curling around the back of my neck. The rough heat of his palm simultaneously anchored me and lifted me up .
He pressed his forehead to mine, the tender touch such a stark contrast to his rough hands.
“You’re exactly that,” he growled. “You’re a fucking problem because I can’t fucking think straight with you around.”
His confession lodged in my chest.
I couldn’t breathe around it.
Didn’t want to.
“I didn’t let them in for me. I did it because I refuse to let the world turn me into something I’m not,” I whispered.
His eyes hardened. “I know. That’s the problem.”
Then he kissed me.
It was hard, hungry.
Consuming.
He fisted his hand in my braids, pulling tight enough to hurt and pulled me flush against him.
I clawed at his shoulders, needing him closer.
He spun us, slamming my back against the storeroom shelves, making the boxes rattle.
I didn’t care.
His mouth moved from my lips to my throat, biting down just enough to make me gasp.
“Jack…” I threaded my hands into his hair, “we shouldn’t?—”
“We should,” he said. “We are.”
He slid his fingers under my shirt as he kissed me.
The taste of him, smoke, sweat, Jack , was everything.
He pulled away, breathing hard, eyes boring into mine in the way that both terrified me and made me so fucking wet, it was shameful. “You piss me off so fucking much, Asia.”
I lifted one corner of my mouth into a smile. “Welcome to the club, Jackson.”
He brushed his thumb over my lower lip, his eyes still on mine. “I still want you anyway.”
And then his mouth was on mine again.
Harder this time, even more desperate.
He ground against my stomach.
He was rock hard, his long thick length pulsing with need.
I squirmed, my pussy slick with the anticipation of having him inside me again.
I’d have to wait.
“Down,” he commanded, pushing me to my knees. His voice was commanding, urgent, the tone alone was enough to undo me.
I landed with an ungraceful thud, and looked up.
Jack worked his pants open, his movements efficient and controlled, but I was sure I saw a tremor in his hands.
It could have been my imagination, but I didn’t have time to decide, not when he presented his cock. I breathed in deep, the scent of Jack drowning out everything.
When I looked up, he stared down at me with that intense gaze that still made me feel both small and powerful, exposed and protected.
I started to look away.
Jack wasn’t having it.
“Eyes on me,” he barked.
My gaze snapped to his, and I saw a cruel little lift of his mouth.
It wasn’t a smile, but it made me want to preen.
Didn’t have time for that, though.
Jack grabbed his cock at the base and brushed it against my lips, leaving a trail of precum behind .
My lips parted of their own volition, and Jack took advantage.
He bucked his hips slightly, demanding entrance.
I opened and filled my mouth, feeding me his cock until I overflowed.
He gripped my hair again, and I moaned, rewarded by a violent shudder that racked his big body.
He pushed the back of my head, the little smile twisting his face, the cruel promise in his eyes, making my breath come in short, rough pants.
“Finally found something useful for that annoying fucking mouth of yours,” he said.
I couldn’t speak, but I trailed my tongue along the thick vein running the length of his shaft.
From the way Jack tightened his hold on my hair, I proved my point.
He gave me a wicked grin, and then set about proving his own.
He thrust a little harder, his cock nudging the back of my throat. My eyes widened, but when I saw the smirk on his face, I breathed out through my nose and relaxed my throat .
Jack moaned as he slid an inch deeper, and then something seemed to break loose in him. He thrust and pushed against my head, driving deeper into my throat.
I felt a feral sort of pride that I could take him like this, satisfaction blooming in my chest at his harsh breaths, the little tremble in his fingers as he gripped my head almost frantically.
My jaw ached, my knees ached, and spit and precum leaked from the corner of my mouth, but I stayed in place, desperate to let Jack use me.
A guttural moan ripped from his chest as he stilled, and I braced myself.
“Swallow every drop,” he barked as he came down my throat.
His body racked once, twice, a third time, and bit by bit, his cock softened.
I felt strangely bereft when he slid his cock out of my mouth, a feeling that receded when he pulled me to my feet and pressed my chest against his.
It wasn’t a hug, but being this close to him, his strong muscles, warm skin, the steady beat of his heart against my chest, was exactly what I needed.
“Still think we shouldn’t have let them in?” I teased a few minutes later, my voice raspy and wrecked.
He let out a breathless laugh, then kissed me, slow and deep.
“Not thinking about them right now,” he muttered. A second later, he added, “Just you.”
He sounded almost surprised that he said it, but he didn’t try to take it back.
Instead, he just pulled me closer.