His to Have

Chapter 4 Ayanna

four

Ayanna

Ipaced the length of my bedroom, frustrated as hell. My hands ran through my braided hair, tugging at the roots just hard enough to keep me from losing my damn mind. Exasperated, I yanked off my glasses, and threw them onto the bed. All I could think about was Teo motherfuckin’ Donatelli.

I rubbed my fingers against my throbbing temple, trying to ease the tension that seemed to surge with every thought of him.

“I swear to God, I am going to kill him,” I muttered, grabbing a throw pillow off the bed and hurling it across the room. The cushion hit the wall with a dull thud, doing absolutely nothing to make me feel better. But it was the only outlet I had at the moment.

“How is he just gone… UGH?” I ranted to no one.

The words barely left my mouth as I flopped onto my bed, throwing my forearm across my face. The ceiling stared back at me, offering no answers, no solace, just a plain, empty stretch of nothingness for my spiraling thoughts.

I didn’t know what pissed me off more, the fact that he had kept the whole marriage thing from me for so long, or that, now, I couldn’t stop thinking about that night. The one I pretended didn’t happen. The night that ruined me for any other man.

I rolled over, grabbing my phone just to stare at it.

I halfway expected Teo to already be on my line, but I should have known better.

That man was calculating. His presence would be felt, whether he reached out or not.

I contemplated calling Corey, just to prove everyone, including myself that I had control over my life.

But deep down, I knew calling Corey wouldn’t change anything.

It would just be a temporary distraction.

But a distraction I truly needed, because I needed a minute to escape.

As my finger hovered over Corey’s name I considered if I wanted to deal with his neediness. Closing my eyes, I thought better of it, pulling my finger away from his contact, and doing something even more reckless. I dialed Teo.

The moment I hit “call,” I regretted it almost immediately. My chest was tight, and my pulse raced as the line rang. Every second that passed, I considered hanging up, but then he answered, on the second ring.

Before I could lay into his lying ass, his voice came through in a mumbled whisper. “Give me just a moment.”

He wasn’t talking to me, but to someone in the background. The feminine voice that came from the other end and his movement in the background only added to my irritation.

Was it wrong that I was annoyed? Probably.

Especially since my frustration wasn’t rooted in logic.

It wasn’t like I had any say in what Teo did with other people, and yet.

.. hearing some woman’s voice on the other end of the line, right after finding out we were supposed to get married?

It pissed me off. This wasn’t jealousy. I convinced myself of that. I was mad because of the lie.

When he returned, I expected a call, but Teo had a different idea. “I’m video calling you.”

I frowned, my grip tightening on the phone. “Teo, I didn’t say I wanted—”

“I wanna see your face Yanna,” he interrupted, his tone leaving no room for argument. “Answer it.”

A moment later, his gorgeous face flashed across the screen, the video request staring back at me. My thumb hovered over the button, as I considered whether I wanted to look at him or not. Teo had a way of unraveling me with just a look. Hell, sometimes with just my name.

I knew what he was trying to do. He was trying to get in my head, and the worst part was, it always worked. But I couldn’t let it. Not this time. Not again. I bit my lip, my thoughts spiraling.

God, why is everything with him so complicated?

Taking a deep breath, I reluctantly accepted the call to face whatever emotions his intense gaze would evoke. When his face appeared, looking calm, and collected, I knew this conversation was going to be anything but calm.

How was he looking at me like he didn’t know this news of our marriage? Like this arrangement hadn’t turned my entire life upside down? It was infuriating to see him so composed when I felt like my world was crashing down.

He leaned against some unfamiliar wall in a room I didn’t recognize, his expression unreadable. But me? I was a mess.

“The fuck, Teo!” My fist slammed against the bedside table before I could stop myself, making everything on it rattle. My heart was beating so loud, I could hear it in my ears.

He didn’t even flinch. His eyebrows raised a little, but that was it. His gaze stayed locked on me, watching the storm brewing inside me. “You’ve got a lot of nerve. I know you know about this marriage bullshit, and didn’t bother to tell me.”

The words rushed out before I could hold them back. My voice was sharp, and full of anger.

He said nothing. Just stared at me with that same calm face which only fueled my rant.

“And then you sit up in my face today, looking at me like everything’s cool—like everything is normal. How the hell are you gonna act like this isn’t some life-changing shit? Like... A. There’s a threat on my life. And B. We’re supposed to get married!”

I didn’t stop, even as my chest tightened with frustration. “And C,” I snapped, “Where the hell are you?”

There was a pause—a long one—and for a split second, I thought he might actually flinch. But no, of course not. I got a reaction, just not the one I wanted. He fucking smirked at me. And I thought I may actually fling my phone across my bedroom.

“You finished?”

“Am I finished?” I spat back. “No, Teo, I’m not fucking finished. Do you even care about how I feel? Or is this just about your precious territories, and expanding your family’s empires!”

His eyes narrowed just enough for me to see it—a flicker of something. Good. I wanted him to feel something… anything. Anger, indifference… or anything other than this composed man when all I felt was chaos inside.

“Are you done?”

This time, his voice was laced with authority. A quiet demand that wasn’t a question but a command for me to stop talking and listen.

I clenched my fists, but held back the outburst that was dying to escape.

“First of all, Yanna—”

“Don’t Yanna me,” I snapped, cutting him off before he could even finish. “You lost the right to say my name like that.”

His face hardened. That calm expression? Gone. And I knew I’d struck a nerve.

Teo leaned forward, the light in his eyes changing from passive to something darker. “I lost the right?” he repeated. His voice dripped with mockery, and my pulse took flight.

But I held his gaze. I wasn’t backing down. “Yes, Teo. Only my friends call me that. You are no friend to me.”

“Let me make something clear. I haven’t lost a damn thing when it comes to you. I’m the only one who has rights when it comes to you, Yanna.” His tone was like ice.

If I wasn’t so familiar with him and knew for a fact, he would never do anything to me his tone may have scared me. “You may think that.”

“Nah, Amore mio,” he said, his eyes dark and unflinching. “That’s something I know.”

His words landed like a punch to the gut.

Teo calling me “Amore” had always hit differently—it disarmed me, softened me, no matter how angry I was. But when he said “Amore mio,” it was more than that. It wasn’t casual. He didn’t use it often, but when he did, I knew he was serious.

I’d learned a few words here and there over the years, especially given how often Teo switched into Italian when he was with his family.

His father, Marco, and his grandparents from Italy only spoke Italian around the house, and Teo grew up speaking both fluently.

I knew “Amore” meant love, but “Amore mio” held a deeper meaning.

My love. It wasn’t just something he said.

It had meaning, and my breath caught in my throat, understanding the weight behind those words.

There was no mistaking what he meant. I’d always known.

“Ti amo, amore mio. Un giorno mi lascerai avere tutto di te,” he murmured into my ear the morning after that fateful night.

The night I decided I wanted him to be my first. My first everything; my first sexual partner, my first real boyfriend, and the first person I trusted with my heart.

But the next morning I freaked out. Thinking about all the women pining after him, or the women who were more suited to be with the next Don of his family.

I wasn’t seeking that lifestyle and thought it would be best to leave it to the mafia daughters, cousins, and sisters who were groomed for that role.

But that’s what nagged at me. He whispered those words with such certainty as I walked out his bedroom that morning.

He knew about the arrangement then and said nothing.

Three years ago, I gave him my virginity.

Then when I chicken out of a relationship with him, he told me that I would one day belong entirely to him.

His declaration of love was unwavering then, and I can see now that it would come to pass.

I blinked, trying to ignore the way my body reacted to that phrase. How it settled over me, wrapping me up in the reality of what he was saying.

“You don’t get to...” I started, but my voice wavered, and I hated that it did. “You don’t get to do that Teo. You knew about the alliance years ago and didn’t tell me. I thought we were friends. I thought you cared about me. And to find out everyone close to me knew is so fucked up.”

His eyes softened a bit, and I could see a hint of regret. “I do care about you, Yanna. Always have.” His voice was filled with so much sincerity that it made my chest tighten.

Before I could respond, a soft voice, the same feminine voice from earlier, came from his end of the call.

“Teo, we’re waiting for you in the family room.”

My breath caught in my throat. The familiar, casual way she said his name had me gripping the phone just a little bit tighter, and my eyes rolling.

Over the years, I’d never run into a woman he dealt with intimately.

Our paths never crossed. I never heard them in the background when we chatted.

So, hearing a woman’s voice now, so close and intimate, hours after finding out I had been promised to him, shattered the illusion of a happily ever after I was trying to accept.

“I’ll be down in a minute,” he told her, not breaking eye contact with me for even a second. His expression didn’t even change.

“Alright,” the woman replied, her voice carrying that air of familiarity that grated on me more than it should have. She lingered for a moment, her heels clicking faintly in the background before fading away.

I clenched my jaw, trying to shove down the irrational anger. Teo’s gaze never left mine, daring me to say something, to ask about her. But I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction.

When I didn’t say anything, he said, “I was planning to come see about you this weekend. I wanted to give you time to wrap your head around this. But I see that this is bothering you. I’ll be on the first flight out of here in the morning. We can discuss it then. Okay?”

I scoffed, the bitterness about everything dripped from my words. “You know what? Don’t bother. You can stay doing whatever has you so busy tonight.”

“Is there something you wanna ask me, Yanna?” His eyebrows lifted.

“Nope,” I bit out, “I’m good. Enjoy your... company.”

The muscle in his jaw twitched, but his voice stayed maddeningly calm. “You sure? Because if you’ve got something to say, now’s the time.”

I swallowed hard, my pulse thrumming in my neck. “It’s okay. You don’t owe me anything. Clearly, I caught you at a bad time, and you’ve got shit going on. I’ll just talk to you later.”

His eyes narrowed just slightly, and I could see it.

The shift. I looked away trying to focus on the room around me, searching for anything to distract myself from the intensity of his gaze.

The shine from the freshly polished hardwood floors suddenly seemed fascinating.

I traced it with my eyes, willing my heart, and my feelings to not be affected by things that shouldn’t hurt me. The silence stretched between us.

“Call me when you are on the way,” I murmured instead of looking at him.

“Look at me,” he commanded, and my eyes snapped back to my screen where his hazel eyes pierced through me.

The room felt smaller, my skin prickling with frustration. I was caught between wanting to scream and... something else.

“There’s nothing going on here,” he drawled, as if daring me to doubt him. “But you need to say what’s really bothering you, Yanna. Because we’re not doing this back and forth if you don’t ask the right questions. Now, I gotta go.”

“Fine,” I muttered reluctantly, feeling the weight of his words. “We can talk later, but I’m not flipping my life upside down. I don’t care what you or my father say. I have my own life.”

He smirked. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Amore. I expect you will have dealt with that little situation you call yourself being in.”

“I’m not breaking up with Corey.”

“You will. If you know what’s best for him. You know how I get down. You don’t want me to handle it.”

I swallowed hard because he could be a teddy bear when it came to me but a straight up menace when it came to everyone else.

“I’ve already murked a nigga over you today. Don’t make me add a body, Amore.”

His tone was devoid of any humor, and the icy edge in his voice made me pause. I knew he wasn’t bluffing. As much as I wanted to dismiss his words as mere bravado, deep down, I understood the lengths he would go.

“Handle it. And I will see you tomorrow.” He hung up the phone, leaving me more confused and angry than before.

The static silence in the room was deafening, amplifying my frustration.

I sank back onto my bed, my mind racing with conflicting emotions.

On the one hand, I wanted to say fuck Teo, my dad, and anyone else that thought they had a say over how I lived my life.

But on the other... Teo wasn’t wrapped too tight.

His threats weren’t empty. As much as I wanted to fight him, to prove I had control over my own life, I couldn’t put Corey in the crossfire.

He didn’t deserve that.

So, I did the responsible thing. I picked up the phone, dialed Corey’s number, and inevitably saved his life.

When he answered, I led with, “We need to talk.”