Chapter 19
CHAPTER 19
ATLAS
C larity teases the edge of my consciousness, leaving me somewhere between awake and asleep.
My bladder is telling me I need to get up, but my body is content to stay in this bed, with Nora curled around me, forever.
Her head is nestled perfectly into the crook of my neck with her arm thrown over my chest, her palm resting right over my heart.
But it’s her legs all tangled up with mine that has me reluctant to leave.
Nora’s body molds to mine like we’re two halves of the same whole.
It sounds sappy as fuck, but it’s true, and I love it.
The problem is, I’m hard as a rock, and she’s dangerously close to being woken up by my very hard dick.
It feels wrong, being turned on while she sleeps in my arms. I could play it off as simple biology, but it’s more than that.
I’ve jerked off to thoughts of Nora more times than I can count in the short amount of time she’s been here.
Maybe that makes me a pervert, I don’t know.
My feelings for her are so tangled up.
To an outsider, our relationship—if we had one—seems wrong, but I know in my soul that she and I are so fucking right it’s not even funny.
I don’t know how I went from content to stay single to ready to put down roots in the blink of an eye, but somewhere along the way, I caught feelings.
She shifts against me, hitching her leg higher around my hips.
She’s damn near straddling my thigh, and her pussy is way too close for comfort.
“Pip,” I whisper, brushing my fingertips over her shoulder.
“You gotta roll over.”
Instead of rolling over, Nora ratchets up my torture by a lot as she slides her hand down from my chest to the waistband of my sweats.
Her pinky finger is dangerously close to my dick, and I swear to God, it’s straining to rise up and meet her.
I know I could slip out of the bed.
I could and I should.
Unfortunately, my brain and body aren’t on the same page.
Hell, they’re not even reading the same book.
My brain is shouting for me to be a gentleman, to hightail it out of the bed before something bad happens.
But my stupid, selfish body is warm and content and totally at peace.
Get your shit together, I scold myself, finally finding the willpower to move away from the little redheaded siren wrapped around me.
Only before I can, her hand slips down lower, and just like that, she’s palming my cock.
Fuck. Me.
“Nora,” I croak her name, trying with all my might to keep my body still.
“You’ve gotta let me go.”
I should have bounced the second I woke up, but now she’s wrapped around me like an octopus, and I’m stuck.
She squeezes my dick, and even through my clothes, it sets me on fire.
My hips buck involuntarily as a groan slips past my lips.
“Atlas?” she asks, her voice still thick with sleep.
“Yeah, Pip?” My voice sounds hoarse even to my own ears.
“I’m…touching you…” Her fingers give a little flex, as if to emphasize her words.
My throat bobs as I swallow.
“You are.” Please don’t hate me…
please don’t ever stop…
“You’re hard.” She scrapes her teeth over her lower lip as she looks up at me from beneath her long lashes.
“I am.” My cock pulses beneath her touch, as if it has a mind of its own.
Holy hell, how could I not be with Nora’s lithe little body pressed so snugly against mine?
“Does…does it hurt?” Her voice is this odd combination of curiosity and embarrassment.
But she doesn’t need to be; she can ask me anything, any time.
“Nothing about your hand wrapped around my dick hurts, Nora.” I pinch my eyes shut and take a calming breath before looking at her.
“If anything, it feels too good.”
“Are you sure? That face you just made looked pained.” She pouts, and all I want to do is kiss her pretty mouth.
“Pained because I like it.” Pained because I want you to slip your hands into my sweatpants so I can feel your skin on mine.
I keep my answer short; Nora doesn’t need to know all of the filthy things tumbling around in my head.
“Can I see it?” Her cheeks go atomic as soon as the words leave her mouth.
“OhmyGod, never mind. I-I can’t believe I just asked you that! What is wrong with me? Oh, God?—”
“Pip.” Something in the way I say her name has her lips snapping together like a rubber band.
“There’s no part of me that you can’t see or touch anytime you want.”
“Really?” The word is nothing more than a breathy whisper.
“Really.” I hook my thumbs into the waistband of my sweats and drag them down, allowing my erection to spring free.
Her eyes bulge at the sight of it, causing a swell of masculine pride to rush through me.
“It’s so…” She gulps.
“Big.”
I grin, and Nora rolls her eyes before looking her fill.
She lifts her hand from it resting on my abs, as if she’s going to reach for me, but yanks it back at the last second.
“You can touch it,” I say, silently praying I don’t nut the second she makes contact.
“I can?” She licks her lips, and I nod.
“Okay.”
“Oh!” Nora sucks in a sharp breath as she gently squeezes the tip between her index finger and thumb.
“It’s softer than I thought it’d be.”
I grunt, unable to form any kind of intelligent reply because I’m doing three-digit multiplication in my head.
Sliding her hand down, she fists my dick, jerking me once from tip to root.
That single motion has me seeing stars.
Fuck, how can this not-even-a-hand-job feel this good?
It’s like I’m having some kind of out-of-body experience as Nora explores my body.
Precum leaks from my tip, drawing Nora’s eyes.
She looks from it to me, and back again.
“Can I taste it…taste you?”
Fuuuuuck.
Who even is this woman?
This innocent little spitfire of a vixen.
“Yes! God, please, yes.” Every single muscle in my body tenses in anticipation.
Jesus, the thought of her mouth on me is like my birthday, Halloween, and Christmas all rolled into one.
She wiggles out of my hold and pushes up to her knees, staring down at my dick like it’s an equation that needs solving.
Leaning forward, she wraps one hand around my base.
Anticipation thrums like electrical currents through a battery.
My entire body is amped up, primed and waiting for whatever delicious torture she’s about to unleash.
“Like this?” She slowly drags her fist up my length.
“Grip it harder.” My voice sounds rough, even to my own ears, but I can’t help it.
I’m a man on the edge, and Nora’s either going to be my savior or my damnation.
“Like this?” She tightens her fist a little bit.
“A little more.”
She shoots me a worried look.
“I-I don’t want to hurt you.”
“Nora, I promise, any time your hands are on me, the only thing I’m feeling is pleasure.” I cover her hand with mine, adjusting her grip.
“Now you’re going to do it just like this.”
I help guide her motions, loving the way her confidence grows with each pass.
“I’m ready,” she says after a few strokes.
“Ready to taste it.”
That’s all the warning I get before she swipes her tongue over the head of my cock, lapping up my precum like it’s the tastiest treat.
“Salty.” She wraps her lips around the crown and sucks softly.
“Fuck, Pip.” I have to fist my hands at my sides to keep from reaching for her.
“You feel so good.”
My reaction is extreme, but her mouth on my dick—hell, on any part of me—is like finding water in the desert when you’ve been walking for days.
She’s my oasis.
“Can you take any more?” I ask, actively pressing my hips back into the mattress to keep myself from fucking her mouth.
“Maybe a little.” She speaks the words around my dick before sucking me deeper into her mouth.
“Hollow out your cheeks and just swallow down as much as you can.”
She gags a little, and I try to pull back, but she follows me with her whole body, her lips never leaving me.
I feel like a fucking teenager getting his first ever BJ—it’s sloppy, and Nora has literally no technique—and yet I’m still trying my hardest not to bust a nut two minutes in.
It’s her, though; it’s Nora.
She’s everything I never knew I wanted.
Her skill level is irrelevant, simply because it’s her.
“Pip,” I groan her name.
“You gotta stop.”
She releases me with a wet pop.
“Why?”
“I’m gonna—” My whole body tenses as my release rockets through me, rope after rope of cum jetting out onto my abs.
“—come,” I sigh, once I can speak again.
For the second time today, Nora studies me like I’m a problem to be solved.
But this time, it’s my jizz that holds her focus.
She leans forward and drags one finger through the milky substance, smearing it around a bit.
“So warm,” she murmurs, before bringing her finger to her lips, tasting my release.
The face she makes has me grinning big.
“Still salty, though.”
Jesus Christ. That’s it, lights out, I’m finished—this woman is too damn much for me.
Somehow innocent and sexy all at once, she’s got me tied up in knots.
“Pip.” I rasp her name, and she whips her head up to look at me.
But instead of the desire I expect to see reflected back at me in her gaze, I find fear.
“I-I’m sorry,” she starts, trying to scramble away from me.
“Hey, no.” I hold my hands up, showing her I’m not a threat despite wanting nothing more than to yank her back into my arms. “You’re fine. Nothing to apologize for.”
Tears fill her eyes, and I feel like the biggest asshole on the planet.
I should have slipped out of the bed when I had the chance.
“What’s wrong, pretty girl? Talk to me.” I tug my shirt over my head and use it to wipe up my stomach before sliding my sweats back up.
“I hate seeing you cry. Hate it even more when it’s my fault. Did I push you too far?”
I spear my fingers through my hair.
Of course, I did, because I’m a selfish bastard.
She showed a modicum of interest, and I lost my composure.
God.
“No!” She all but shouts the word.
“It’s not you. I—it’s me. I took advantage of you, Atlas, and that was wrong, and I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.” She wails the last word, crumpling into a heap on my chest.
My heart beats erratically in my chest as she cries tears of misplaced guilt.
“Nora, I need you to listen to me.” I thread my fingers through her messy hair so that I can see her eyes.
“Can you do that?”
She sits up and then nods.
“Nothing about what just happened between us wasn’t enthusiastically consensual on my part. I meant it when I said you can touch or taste any part of me, any time. As far as I’m concerned, you have carte blanche when it comes to me. Do you understand?”
“D-do you mean that?” She tucks her hair behind her ear, searching my face for any hint of deception.
“Wholeheartedly, Pip.” I stroke my fingers over her lightly freckled cheek.
“As long as you’re okay with what just happened between us, I am, too. And if nothing else ever happens, that is fine, too. You set the pace, and I’ll gladly follow, okay?”
“I don’t deserve you, Atlas Wallace.”
“That’s where you’re wrong.” I lean forward and press a soft kiss to her lips.
“You deserve every good thing there is, and then some. And if I happen to fit into that somewhere, then I’m the luckiest motherfucker on the whole planet.”
DIARY ENTRY, PRESENT DAY
Dear Diary,
It’s been three days since Atlas let me make him come.
Oh my God, just writing that has me blushing.
After our…encounter…
I texted Maggie for an emergency appointment.
Luckily, she was able to chat with me the next day.
It was a little—okay, a lot—awkward telling her why I needed to talk to her so urgently when we had just talked the day before, but I’m so glad I did.
I also confessed to her, and now to you, Diary, that while I don’t know that I’m ready to be touched, touching Atlas like that made me feel powerful.
The fact that I was able to make someone so big and strong tremble with need was…
gratifying.
Not to mention, he was respectful of me every step of the way.
But a small part of me felt like it was all too fast.
Thankfully, Maggie was able to give me the perspective I was lacking.
She told me the only person who can decide what I’m ready for is me, and that there’s no right or wrong pace.
Which brings me to my new predicament…
I want more. More of Atlas, more of his pleasure, more of the power that comes with making his knees shake.
I’m just not sure how to go about asking him.
I know he said I could put my hands and mouth on him any time, but I can’t very well just walk up and grab his junk, now can I?
But I think asking out loud might be even worse.
I don’t know.
I remember one time Mama said if someone wasn’t mature enough to talk about it, then they weren’t mature enough to do it.
So, I guess I better practice in the mirror or something, because my body is so keyed up with need I’m liable to jump him if I don’t. Frustrated, Nora