Chapter 23
CHAPTER 23
NORA
“ T hat wasn’t so bad, was it?” Atlas asks as we step out onto the sidewalk.
The sun is so bright overhead, I have to squint my eyes to look up at him.
“I don’t know. There were so many people in there. It was… kind of awful.” I pretend to shake off my disgust.
Atlas laughs and I swear the rich sound warms me more than the sun.
“Welcome to the DMV, pretty girl. It’s one of the worst parts of adulthood. Just wait until you have to renew your tag.”
I don’t mean to, but I scoff.
“That would require me to know how to drive.” Dad used to always talk about teaching me.
He drove an old Jeep named Mavis, and he swore up and down if you could handle Mavis, you could drive anything.
“You don’t—” He clamps his lips together and then slips his hand into mine as we walk back to his truck.
“Of course, you don’t. I’ll teach you.”
“Really?” I pivot my entire body to face him, throwing my arms around his neck.
Miraculously, he catches me, and smoothly swings me around to his other side.
“Hell yeah.” Atlas once again laces our fingers together.
“It’ll be fun.”
“I don’t know about that.” I roll my eyes to disguise the excitement rushing through me.
Driving is something I thought I’d never get to do.
“But I’m grateful all the same.”
He unlocks his truck once and opens the passenger door, scooping me up and setting me on the seat before running around to his side.
“I’d be hard pressed to think of a single thing you could ask me for that I’d say no to, Pip.”
My laughter bubbles up from my belly.
“Be careful now, you might live to regret saying that.”
“Nah.” Atlas starts the truck, checks his mirrors, and pulls smoothly into traffic.
“There’s no regrets when it comes to you.”
Contentment swells within me, leaving no room for doubt.
“Thank you, Atlas,” I whisper, even though those three words aren’t the ones I really want to say.
I love you has been stuck on the tip of my tongue for days now.
But that’s crazy, right?
Is it even possible to fall in love this fast?
I mean, sure, technically I’ve known Atlas for years, but only in the loosest sense of the word.
Maybe love is like grief—maybe it’s not logical either.
Maybe trying to justify or quantify my feelings isn’t the answer.
Because the reality of it is, no matter which way I slice it, I love Atlas Wallace.
The question is, could he ever truly love someone as broken as me?
“Did you hear me?” Atlas asks, alerting me to the fact that he asked an actual question.
“No, I’m sorry.” I tuck my hair behind my ear and focus all of my attention on him.
“Say it again.”
“Do you want to grab something to eat?”
“Like from a restaurant?” I drum my fingers over my well-worn leggings.
“Sure.”
“Are you?” He glances my way before flicking on the turn signal.
“We can hit a drive-thru if you want.”
“No, I’m good. It’s just… been a long time since I’ve been out to eat.”
“Gonna kill that rotten motherfucker,” Atlas mutters viciously under his breath.
“What sounds good to you?”
“Take me somewhere you love.” He knows so much about me, it’s only fair for me to learn all about him.
“Your favorite place.”
He shoots me a wicked grin.
“Hope you don’t mind getting a little messy.”
Before I have a chance to really think about what he meant, he turns into a familiar parking lot.
“Cluckers?” I ask, bouncing slightly in my seat.
“You know it?” He parks and cuts the engine.
“Yeah. My dad used to bring me here all the time when I was a kid.” Memories of our many meals here flash through my mind, leaving me as excited as I am sad.
“One time he even won the Clucker Challenge. He gave me the shirt, and I slept in it every day for a week.”
“Maybe next time we come, I can compete and win you a shirt.” He hops down and jogs around to my side, opening my door.
“You’d do that for me?” I ask, once I’m on my own two feet beside him.
He gives me a duh look.
“I’d offer to do it today, but I have something else in mind.”
“Oh, yeah, what’s that?” Butterfly wings flutter low in my belly as possibilities race through my mind.
He presses a hand to the small of my back, ushering me toward the entrance.
“You’ll have to wait and see.”
“That was so good,” I mutter for the hundredth time since polishing off the last of my six wings.
Growing up, I always got honey barbecue, but Atlas convinced me to try the mango pineapple habanero, and I have zero regrets.
Ugh. Is it possible to have a real baby and a food baby?
“We can come anytime you want, Pip.” He smiles over at me from the driver’s seat.
“You just gotta say the word.”
“I’ll hold you to that. Where to now?”
His kissable lips curl into a mischievous grin.
“You’ll see.”
“Atlas.” I whine his name, not caring one single bit how childish I sound.
“I don’t like surprises.”
Surprises have rarely ever turned out well for me.
Instead of surprise, we’re going on vacation , I got surprise, your dad is dead, and it really just snowballed from there.
“Okay, fine.” He pauses a beat.
“I was thinking we could go shopping.”
“Shopping?” I ask.
“Like for groceries?”
“No.” He draws out the word.
“Like for you.”
“For me?” My brows dip in confusion.
“What for me?”
“Clothes for one.”
“I have clothes,” I argue, knowing full well that’s a lie.
I’ve been living in the same two pairs of leggings and borrowed shirts and socks for weeks now.
“C’mon, Nora,” he pleads, turning into the Target parking lot.
“That bump of yours is growing every day and as much as I love seeing you in my clothes, I know you need some of your own.”
“You know I don’t have any money.” Guilt over the money he’s already spent on me pricks at me like tiny needles.
“And you’ve already done so much for me?—”
“So let me do one more thing.”
On one hand, he’s right, having my own clothes sounds like a dream, but my debts owed to him are racking up faster than I can tally.
“Atlas.” Tears fill my eyes as I whisper his name.
“Please?” He has the audacity to pout at me, puppy dog eyes and all.
Damn him. I can feel my resolve weakening…
bending to his will.
At least he uses his powers for good and not evil.
“Fine.” I heave the word out on a sigh.
His answering smile is one of pure victory.
“But my agreeance comes with terms.”
“Name ‘em.”
“Okay, well, it’s actually only one term.” I can feel my cheeks heating under his scrutiny, but I press on because this is important to me. “You can’t spend more than a hundred bucks on me.”
“Pip,” he pleads, but I cross my arms over my chest and shake my head. His eyes momentarily dip to my breasts, but I don’t mention it.
We sit, locked in our stare down, until finally he relents. “Fine, but that one hundred doesn’t include food or anything for the jellybean, because if you think I’m not spoiling the shit out of our baby, you’re damn wrong.
”
My brain trips over his use of the words our baby.
How is it possible for him to be so all in with someone like me?
Still, I find myself nodding as I unbuckle my seat belt.
Pick your battles, I suppose.
Before I can even blink, Atlas is out of the truck and opening my door.
“C’mon, pretty girl. It’s time to shop.”
He slips his hand into mine as we cut across the parking lot, and even though we’ve held hands more times than I count now, it still feels like electricity skittering over me every time.
“Where to first?” He grabs a buggy and quirks a brow my way.
“Um…” I look around the brightly lit store, unsure of where to go.
“You sort of look like a deer in the headlights, Pip. How about I take the lead until you feel comfortable?”
I nod as a relieved sigh rushes out of me.
He steers us toward the women’s section and tells me to go crazy, and I try to, really I do…
But I can’t. It’s been so long since I’ve picked out clothes for myself, I don’t even know what I like anymore, much less what looks good on me.
My shoulders slump in defeat, the brightly colored clothes mocking me from the racks.
Everything either looks small and tight or boxy and bland.
Isn’t there an in-between section?
Noticing my rising panic, Atlas abandons the cart and tugs me into his chest. “Hey, take a breath, you’ve got this.”
“Do I?” I look up at him with watery eyes.
“There are so many choices and nothing over here seems quite right and?—”
He leans down and presses his lips to mine, silencing my ramblings with the softest, sweetest kiss ever.
The fact that we’re in public isn’t lost on me either.
“Let’s start with the basics. I know Scarlet likes…” He trails off and scratches his chin.
“Yoga pants? Leggings? I don’t know. I think they’re back this way. They’re stretchy and should be comfy over your belly. Then we can grab some shirts to go with them, okay?”
I suck in a deep, calming breath.
“Okay.”
Atlas guides me back toward the activewear section.
It’s much smaller than the women’s section, and I instantly feel more at ease.
“Do you want black ones or color?” he asks, pointing toward a display of neatly folded pants.
“Um.” I know it’s not a quiz, but I still feel like my answer will decide if I pass or fail.
“Maybe both. A black pair and a green pair?”
He nods encouragingly.
“That’s a good start.”
I grab a pair of each color in what I think is my size and toss them into the buggy.
“What now?”
“It’s like pulling teeth with you, huh?” he asks, but the smile on his face tells me he’s only joking.
Smiling, I shrug and make my way over to a pile of folded sweatshirts, grabbing two to coordinate with my bottoms.
“Probably should grab a jacket, too,” he murmurs, tipping his head toward the other side of the aisle where there is an entire wall of outerwear.
“Go pick one you like, I’ll wait here.”
I cut my eyes his way, but he’s the picture of innocence, resting his forearms on the handle of the cart while scrolling on his phone.
The sheer amount of jacket options is wild to me, and I know I should probably pick something basic, but my gaze keeps sliding back to a hot pink puffer with a fur-lined hood.
It’s gaudy and bright, and for some reason, I love it.
I grab it one size too big so that it will fit over my belly before heading back to Atlas.
He intercepts me in the aisle.
“Why don’t you head over to the intimate apparel section next and get some underwear, bras, and socks?”
My cheeks burn so hotly, they must be redder than the store’s trademark bullseye, but still, I do as he says and head over to pick out some new undies.
I grab ten pairs of boyshort-cut panties, two bras, and a pack of socks before making my way back to Atlas, who shockingly is right where I left him.
“Now, we can get you some pajamas or you can keep right on sleeping in my shirts. The choice is yours.”
The words Atlas spoke to me when he caught me in his shirt my first morning at his house echo in my brain.
‘ It looks way better on you than it ever did me.’
Just like that, my decision is made.
“Your shirts, please.”
He smiles, big and proud, like he’s picturing me wearing one right now…
and nothing else.
“Now, we can either check out the maternity section or the shoe section next. Your call, Pip.”
I glance down at my small bump and then back up at him.
“Do you think I need maternity clothes?” There’s a vulnerable edge to my voice that I hate, because it’s that very same voice that whispers mean things in my ear.
Things that make me doubt my worth.
Atlas once again steps away from the shopping cart and into my space.
He pulls me in close, wrapping his strong arms around me as he rests his chin on the top of my head.
“You’re perfect as you are, Pip.” He leans down, bringing his lips to my temple.
“And you’ll be just as perfect when you’re big and swollen with our baby.” He kisses his way down my jaw.
“And once our jellybean is in our arms instead of your belly… you’ll be perfect then, too.”
“Atlas.” I hiccup his name, but he shushes me with another kiss—this one on my lips.
He licks into my mouth, tangling our tongues briefly before pulling away.
“Your body is working miracles right now, Nora, and no matter how it changes, you’re you, and that’s all that matters to me.”
“You really mean that?” I ask, cradling my belly.
This baby is my everything, and the way Atlas so easily accepts us both makes me want to melt into a puddle at his boot-covered feet.
“With every ounce of my being.” He boops my nose, and I grin.
“Now, where are we going next?”
“I think shoes… it might be a while before I need maternity clothes.”
“Lead the way, pretty girl.”
Two pairs of shoes later, and we’re on our way to the baby section—at Atlas’s insistence.
He’s like a kid in a candy store, oohing and aahing over every little thing.
“We don’t need that,” I murmur for the hundredth time, as he holds up the tiniest beanie I’ve ever seen.
“It’ll be chilly when our jellybean makes its debut,” he argues, clutching the hat to his chest, much like he did the pack of onesies, the blanket, and the mittens.
“Atlas.” I drag his name out and he grins, already knowing what I’m going to say.
“It’s a neutral color,” he says, before I have a chance to argue.
“Which means into the cart it goes.”
My eyes follow the beanie as it lands on the top of the pile.
“That’s enough. Seriously, Atlas. There’s not even room for anything else.”
“We could always grab a second cart.” He waggles his brows, and I can’t help but laugh at his antics.
“Absolutely not.” I nudge him with my elbow.
“To checkout we go.”
“Fine.” He sighs dramatically, and together, we head toward the front of the store.
Once we’re at the register, I realize what a sneaky-sneak he is.
For every item I added to the cart, he tossed in two more.
“Atlas!” I hiss his name like an angry cat.
“This is way more than the hundred dollars we agreed on.”
“She’s already scanning,” he says, nodding toward the cashier.
“You don’t want her to have to stop and take things off and then put them back, right? That would be a lot of extra work for her.”
I narrow my eyes at him, forcing myself to ignore the stupid way my heart pitter-patters in my chest. “You are sneaky, and you play dirty.”
“Damn straight.” The corners of his eyes crinkle as he smiles.
“I’m playing to win, Pip, and you’re a stubborn little thing, so I’ll gladly take a mile for every inch you give.”
“To win, huh?” I cross my arms over my chest and pretend to glare.
“What’s the prize, then?”
“You are, Nora.” He gives me a thorough once-over before turning away and tapping his card to the reader. “You’re the prize.”