Chapter 34
CHAPTER 34
NORA
“ P ip?” Atlas calls from the front of the house, the sound of the front door closing echoes behind him.
“Back here,” I call back, my eyes glued to the space we’ve designated for our jellybean.
Atlas and I decided that since we’re in the primary bedroom, we’d section off the little sitting area for our guy.
He even went ahead and painted the walls in his space last night and I can’t stop staring at it.
The space still smells slightly of wet paint, but the color is perfect.
I can see it all so clearly—his crib will go right beneath the window, with floating shelves on the wall above it, and a rocking chair off to the side in the corner.
I can see myself rocking him and feeding him in the middle of the night.
It’s small—no, that’s not right—it’s cozy and perfect and keeps him close to me, which is exactly where I want him.
I keep picturing white fluffy clouds painted over the blue on the walls—a nod to Atlas’s mom, who loved the sky, thick white curtains over the window to filter the light, and a whole shelf of sweet little books for us to read to him as he grows.
“There you are,” he murmurs, stepping up behind me, lifting my hair off my neck and pressing his lips to the sensitive skin there.
“You about ready to go?”
“Just gotta put my boots on.”
“And your coat.” He pins me with a look, but I can’t help but give him a little sass.
“It’s not that cold.” I wrinkle my nose as I plop down onto the bed to slip on my boots.
He opens his mouth, undoubtedly to argue his point further, but I beat him to it.
“But sure, I’ll bring it. Just know if I get hot, you’re carrying it.”
“Pip, I’ll carry you if need be.” He kneels in front of me and helps me into my boots.
“Now c’mon. Ellis has texted me like six times.”
A small laugh escapes me as I force myself back up to my feet to grab my jacket.
“I like him. He makes me feel less needy.”
Atlas grins, and I swear, the sight of it alone sends a rush of warmth through me.
“Yeah, yeah.” His brows furrow.
“He mentioned inviting Scarlet, too. You cool with that?”
“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” Sure, our initial meeting was beyond uncomfortable, but the more time I spend around her, the more I like her.
And I’m pretty positive she likes me, too.
“Just making sure.” He leans down and captures my lips in a kiss that has my toes curling in my boots.
“Now let’s go.”
Like the gentleman he is, Atlas has the truck running so it’s nice and toasty inside.
The fall chill is setting in fast, but I think I’d rather be big and pregnant when it’s cool outside versus when it’s hot, so I have no complaints.
“You ready to pumpkin chuck?” Atlas asks as we pass through the gates marking off the festival grounds.
I link my arm with his, holding him as close as possible while also trying my best to keep my anxiety at bay.
Logically, I know I’m safe with Atlas, but being around this many people out in the open is…
unnerving .
I refuse to let my trauma ruin our day out together though.
And so, with a wobbly smile, I reply, “I’m ready to watch you do it. What I’m excited for is donuts and cider.”
He clutches at his heart with his free hand, kindly not remarking on the mini freakout I know he’s aware I’m having.
The man is more tuned into me and my emotions than I am sometimes.
“Donuts? You like the donuts? What about the funnel cake?”
I shake my head.
“Nope. My dad and I used to come every year, and the donuts were always our favorite part. Cinnamon sugar is superior to powdered sugar. It’s just science.”
“She’s right, you know,” a deep, masculine voice says out of nowhere, sending me into a blind panic.
My heart gallops in my chest, thundering in my ears louder than an entire herd of wild horses as my head swivels side-to-side, looking for anything out of place.
But there’s nothing.
Just normal people strolling about, not paying me a lick of attention.
“It’s just me, Nora,” Ellis says, his hands out in front of him as he slowly moves closer.
Of course, it’s just Ellis .
Safe, trusty Ellis, who we planned to meet in this very spot.
I turn into Atlas, burying my face in his chest as a generous dose of mortification and shame burns my cheeks.
If not for his bulk supporting me, I’m not sure I’d be able to stand.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper.
“Nothing to be sorry about, Pip,” Atlas says, kissing the top of my head.
“This jackass knows better than to sneak up on you.”
“Sneak?” Ellis raises a brow.
“I did not sneak up on anyone. Hell, I was waving my arms like a damn car dealership inflatable.”
The visual is enough to put a small smile on my face.
“Gonna put a freaking bell around your neck,” I mutter, spinning to face him.
“Like a cat?” He tips his head to the side.
“Kinky. I like it.”
“What? No!” I giggle.
“Well, kind of. But just so I can hear you. It’s unnatural for someone of your size to be so stealthy.”
He rolls his eyes before dropping down to his knees.
“From here on out, I will loudly announce my arrival. Please forgive me, Nora.”
The smile on his face tells me he’s kidding, but oh my God, my embarrassment is real.
“Get up! Get up right now and I’ll forgive you—this time.” I point my finger at him in faux warning.
“But only because you agree with me about the donuts.”
“Noted.” His eyes crinkle in the corners as he looks between Atlas and me.
“You’re really okay, Pip?” he asks, looking down at me with the most tender look.
“Promise.” He stares at me for a beat before nodding and turning his focus to Ellis.
“Where’s Scar?”
“I was just about to ask if either of you have seen the she-devil.”
“Don’t call her that!” I scold, which only serves to make both of them laugh.
“I love it when you give us sass, Pip,” Atlas murmurs, wrapping both of his arms around me so he can rest his chin on the top of my head.
“I love the little spitfire you’re turning into. Want more of it.”
“Y’all gonna kiss?” Ellis asks, wagging his brows, erasing any lingering tension from my episode.
“Lemme know first so I can look away. Gotta protect my innocence, ya know?”
I huff out a small laugh while Atlas only glares.
“Geez, tough crowd.” He checks his watch.
“Seriously, where is she? I told her to meet us by the gate ten minutes ago.”
“You weren’t even here ten minutes ago,” Atlas says.
Ellis shrugs, his face looking like he sucked on a lemon.
“When is she ever on time? I should’ve told her twenty minutes early.”
I sigh and snuggle deeper into Atlas’s embrace, content to leave the conversation to them while we wait for Scarlet to join us.
Which she does, after about ten more minutes.
“Sorry! Had to stop and get gas. And coffee.” She thrusts her paper cup in the air toward us.
“Didn’t you learn as a kid that if you’re going to bring something, you need to bring enough for the class?” Ellis crosses his arms, glowering at Scarlet.
“Oh, get over yourself, you big baby.” She cradles the cup to her chest before raising it to her mouth for a long sip.
“So good.”
Ellis strikes like a cobra, snatching it from her and stealing a sip for himself, only to promptly spit the coffee out.
“The fuck is this? Warmed ice cream?”
Atlas and I both chuckle under our breath as Scarlet throws her arms out to either side.
“First of all, you don’t get to steal my drink and then complain about not liking it. So sorry I don’t drink bitter bean juice like you. I prefer my coffee on the sweet side.”
He spits again and then wipes his mouth with the back of his hand.
“This coffee is the only thing sweet about you.”
“Whatever you say, Officer Jackass.” She turns to where Atlas and I are standing.
“Hey there, you two. What are we doing first?”
“Hi,” I murmur, turning my gaze toward Atlas.
“I-I was thinking donuts and cider, but you already have coffee, so we can totally do?—”
Scarlet grins.
“A donut sounds perfect. Let’s go.”
“Am I the only one who prefers the funnel cake?” Atlas sputters.
All three of us answer in tandem.
“Yes.”
As we walk toward the food area, Scarlet sidles up next to me.
“How do you deal with all of this testosterone twenty-four-seven?”
Atlas grunts his displeasure while I merely shrug.
“It doesn’t bother me.”
“That’s because you’re a saint, clearly.”
“It’s not like I know any differently.” It pains me to admit that out loud to her, but it’s true.
I kind of like being around Atlas and Ellis all the time though.
Knowing they’re always near offers me more than a sense of security—which I crave—but their presence also offers me companionship.
It means I’m no longer alone.
Scarlet gasps and jerks to a halt directly in front of us.
“Oh my God, you don’t, do you!” She claps her hands together in a way that has trepidation slithering through me.
“I know just the thing you need.”
“Scarlet, no…” Atlas hedges, his discomfort evident by his now rigid posture.
“Yes!” She nods her head, even as he shakes his.
“I don’t know what’s about to come out of your mouth, but I already know I’m not gonna like it.”
His edginess is causing my unease to coil around my heart, tightening and squeezing to the point where drawing in a full breath is impossible.
“Atlas,” I whisper, desperate to ease the tension settling over our little group.
Up ahead, Ellis finally notices we’re no longer trailing behind him.
Turning back, he jogs over to join us.
“What are y’all doing? I turned around and poof , y’all were gone.”
“Scarlet here’s about to?—”
“I can speak for myself, Atlas Wallace.” She cuts her eyes at him in a frosty glare before turning back to me.
“I was about to suggest a girls’ day for Nora and me.”
“No.” Atlas’s growled monosyllabic reply is so cold, I can’t help but shiver.
Atlas notices, too. Of course he does, and he immediately presses his chest to my back and wraps his arms around me, cocooning me in his warmth.
Unfortunately, this isn’t the kind of cold body heat can help.
“Please don’t fight,” I whisper, but none of them seem to hear me.
“It’s not happening, Scarlet.” Atlas’s tone is resolute—as if his say is final.
Usually, I don’t mind him taking charge, but much like at breakfast the other morning, the conversation is merely about me.
Then again, it would include me, if I’d just speak up.
“Your girlfriend can speak for herself, too.” Scarlet’s tone matches Atlas’s as she crosses her arms over her chest.
My stomach churns as I try to work up the nerve to intervene.
I don’t want them to fight—especially not because of me.
Luckily, Scarlet’s words seem to knock some sense into Atlas.
“Fuck, Pip,” he murmurs, twirling me around to face him.
“I’m sorry. Scarlet’s right. You can think and speak for yourself. The idea of you being out somewhere in public without me has me feeling some kind of way. But that’s on me. That’s my shit to own, not yours. So, if you want to go, I’ll support that decision.”
“You mean that?” I blink up at him, wondering how it’s possible for him to be real.
“Yeah, I mean it.” He inhales deeply before adding, “I’ll support you in anything you want to do. But be patient with me, too, Pip. Knowing he’s still out there somewhere makes me want to never let you leave my side.”
The thought of Rand has my spine snapping straight as paranoia and fear go to war inside of me.
A small part of me wants to burrow into Atlas’s side and never leave.
After all, he is my safe space.
But a larger part of me knows that if I ever want to truly be free from him, I have to be strong…
brave.
I take a few deep breaths, counting down slowly from five in my head, before forcing my muscles to unclench.
“I-I think a girls’ day sounds fun. I… I’ve never really done that before.”
I can tell Scarlet wants to comment on that, but Ellis intervenes before she can.
“Rude.” He looks me up and down.
“We’ve had many a girls’ day, Nora.”
Just like that, the tension breaks and a laugh slips past my lips.
“I’m not sure binge-watching girly shows with you counts, but…”
“It so does,” he insists.
But Scarlet’s not having it.
“It absolutely does not. I’ll get your number from Atlas, and we can set something up.”
Atlas rolls his eyes and leans down to whisper in my ear.
“You sure you don’t wanna ditch these two and just do us?”
“I’m sure.” I pop up onto my toes and press a quick kiss to his lips.
“If you’re really sure…”
“I am.”