Chapter 22 #4
“Do you remember when we returned from the sleigh ride and you were home? You took my bonnet off and unbuttoned my coat.”
He smiled mischievously as he kissed her hair again. “Of course, I remember; you were so cold and frozen that I could think of nothing but how better to warm you.”
“Oh, you are only teasing me. I am sure you did not think of such a thing that day.”
“Believe me, I did.” He laughed, and her eyebrows rose in disbelief.
“If I were to believe what you are saying, it seems you had nothing but improper thoughts about me,” she said reproachfully, and he laughed louder.
“I might have had a few proper thoughts.” He then turned serious and lowered his head to her, his fingers brushing over her face.
“I think I began to desire you and dream about you even before I realised I was in love with you. During your stay at Netherfield, there was not a single hour that I did not imagine how it would feel to embrace you, to kiss you, to touch you…
“I cannot imagine those kinds of thoughts crossed your mind when I was certain you were looking at me only to find a blemish. I never read passion or desire in your eyes.”
She paused a moment then admitted with a smile, “It is also true that, at that time, I did not really know what passion and desire look like.”
“And you do now?”
“I most certainly do…” she responded, daringly lifting her face to meet his lips. He stole a brief kiss then caressed her face tenderly.
“You must help me to behave properly on this long journey, and that will be a very difficult task.”
Before she had time to reply, he captured her lips eagerly while his left hand cupped her face and neck.
His tongue tantalised her lips then moved down to her throat; he cast a short glance through the small window to ascertain that the coachman had his back to them, then he gently bit her ear and spoke hoarsely.
“I cannot possibly bear to wait until Pemberley…without touching you…but I promise I will be careful not to disturb your appearance…too much…”
His hand touched her bare arms then ran over her ribs and lingered upon her breast. His fingers did not move, only cupped her soft roundness then brushed slowly, tenderly, barely touching the soft fabric. She sighed, and his mouth covered her moan.
“We must behave properly,” she said breathlessly after some time. He smiled and nodded then separated from her but did not release her from his embrace. His right arm remained around her shoulders, and she cuddled to his chest, silently admiring the passing landscape.
They stopped every few hours to change horses and refresh themselves.
Everything was perfectly arranged for their journey, a good sign that Miles, who had been sent ahead, was managing his duties most diligently.
Inside the carriage, their behaviour became less proper several times, as Elizabeth pointed out with equal amusement and embarrassment.
Finally, at the end of a distressing, warm, and lengthy day, they stopped for the night at a small inn in Northamptonshire. It was a nice building—not large but well cared for—with a lovely yard full of flowers and lit by several torches.
The owner and his wife hurried to welcome them; it was obvious that Darcy had been their guest previously, and they seemed pleased to see him again. Darcy introduced Elizabeth to Mr and Mrs Johnson, who offered warm congratulations.
“Mr Darcy, we have prepared the upstairs rooms for you.”
“Thank you, Mrs Johnson. Do you have other guests?”
“No, sir. Miles paid for all the rooms yesterday.”
“Excellent. Thank you.” Elizabeth watched her husband with equal amusement and anxiety. He certainly knew how to have his way. He had paid for the entire inn, so nobody would disturb them, she thought, feeling her cheeks flush.
The rooms were large and nicely furnished. There was a small office separating the bedroom doors, which were now open.
“There is hot water prepared in your rooms. I will send a maid to help Mrs Darcy.
“Thank you, Mrs Johnson. Everything is perfect, as always.”
“I will ask for dinner a little later,” he whispered to Elizabeth, and she smiled, flustered.
She had no patience to enjoy a long bath, so she prepared herself rather quickly.
She glanced at her image in the small mirror and was pleased enough.
She then dismissed the maid and hesitantly knocked at his door.
He opened and looked at her so intently that she could feel his eyes caressing her.
He took her hand, kissed her and invited her to sit at the small table in the middle room.
“This is lovely,” she whispered, “but I doubt I will be able to eat much.”
“You have to.” He smiled. “You must eat well and sleep well; it was a long day, and we have another one and half ahead.”
She laughed nervously. “I guess I must obey you, now that we are married.”
“True…” He watched her closely then suddenly took her hand and raised her from the seat; he gently embraced her and kissed her temple.
“Are you nervous?”
“No, no…yes…a little…”
He cupped her face, and his gaze deepened into her eyes.
“There is no need to be nervous. This will not be our wedding night…”
“It will not?” She stared at him in disbelief, uncertain of his meaning.
“I would like our first time as man and wife to be in our home if you agree…”
“Oh…” She averted her eyes from him a moment, her cheeks burning. He smiled and stole a hasty kiss, his thumbs caressing her cheeks.
“I do not want anything or anyone to disturb us; I want to have my mind and my heart and my body preoccupied with nothing but you. I want us to love each other as we please in comfort, without hurry, then to sleep if we like then love each other again…”
She could feel his gaze deep inside her, invading her soul, and she shivered at each word. She put her palms over his hands.
“I think it a perfect arrangement…” she said with a trembling voice, attempting a smile.
“No, it is not perfect; a perfect arrangement would have been to marry at Pemberley and take you to our rooms a minute after the wedding, but we must make the best of this. Now let us eat; you must be starved. Then we shall try to get some sleep; we must wake early in the morning since we have a full day of travel. We will see how far we can go tomorrow, and we will decide whether we spend another day on the road.”
When they returned to the dinner table, Elizabeth’s anxiety had vanished completely, and her appetite seemed to increase with every bite.
He poured her a little wine, and after the first gulp, her cheeks turned crimson, and she grew more animated.
To the contrary, Darcy’s hunger for food diminished as he could think of nothing but the beautiful woman who was now his wife—the one who gazed at him with adoring tenderness, blushed for him, and laughed at him, her long, dark hair falling on her shoulders in heavy, silky curls.
He wondered whether he would be able to restrain himself ’til they reached Pemberley.
He planned to use the time to allow her to become more at ease with him, more comfortable with his touch, to become aware of her own wishes and determine she desired him as much as he desired her.
It was a little scheme he had planned since they decided to journey to Pemberley after the wedding, yet he was uncertain whether he would have the self-restraint to control his passion.
“Should we go to sleep?” she asked timidly, and her voice brought him back from his reverie.
She seemed to wait for his indication as to what to do next.
He gently took off her robe then lifted her in his arms. She released a small cry of surprise and encircled his neck with soft, warm arms; then a moment later, their lips joined passionately.
He put her on the bed, went to blow out the candles, and returned to sit on the bed beside her.
She snuggled to his chest, and he put his arm behind her to pull her closer.
“I have long wished to sleep in your arms again,” she whispered while her fingers touched the thin fabric of his nightshirt.
“And I have wished to have you in my arms again even longer, my love.” He gently nestled her against the pillows, his fingers brushing over her eyes and cheekbone, and lingering on her lips a moment; then suddenly his mouth captured hers with tender passion.
The kiss started gently, but soon the tenderness turned into breathtaking desire.
As his lips became more demanding, his hands eagerly caressed her throat, her shoulders, her bare arms, then returned to reach the edge of her nightgown.
The soft fabric was pulled down from her shoulders and gathered on her breasts; he broke the kiss and withdrew from her a moment, but her hands were tightly clasped around his neck, and she seemed unwilling to allow his departure.
He smiled and returned to her lips until their need for air became stronger.
He looked at her through the darkness; the moonlight shyly entered through the windows, and her eyes sparkled like stars.
“I want to show you how much I love and desire you…” he said hoarsely.
“Please show me,” she whispered, closing her eyes and parting her lips for him.