Chapter Five
“Do you want to tell me what is going on with your father?” Luca asked the moment he stepped into the kitchen that night.
Tillie had on one of her many aprons and stood at the stove, stirringa pot.
“Nothing is going on.”
“No?” He folded his arms across his chest.
“No, there isn’t, and what was with pointing at your lips at lunchtime as if I’m supposed to know exactlywhat you want? We’ve never kissed like that.”
“No, but having my face between your legs this morning didn’t show a sign of things changing?”
She gasped and he saw her face go red.“I had no idea.”
“It’s simple. As part of our marriage, you kiss me when you enter and leave a room, and just so you know, I’m standing in the kitchen.”
Tillie opened her mouth and closed it. “Are you just going to spend our marriage making up rules as they suit you?”
“I’ve never been married before so I am making up rules that suit both of us.”
She rolled her eyes and he found it so cute, but then he did get a kiss, and all was well.
Tillie moved away and went back to her pot on the stove.
“So, what is going on with your father?”
“Nothing.”
“You know, considering you helped keep the company in one piece and convinced me to keep him on, working for me, you’d think he would seem a little happier to see you.”
She stared at him and pressed her lips together. “I’m sure he was.”
“Tillie, you looked uncomfortable.”
She dropped the spoon she’d been using and nibbled her lip. “Fine, Dad … he didn’t want me to do what I did, butat the same time, he didn’t have any way of helping or changing what was happening.”
“He didn’t want you to marry me?”
“Dad is kind of old-fashioned.”
“Old-fashioned?”
“Yeah, he believes it’s up to you to provide, and women to be cherished.”
“I thought you were going to say at home, barefoot and pregnant.”
She sighed. “It’s complicated.”
“He has women working for him.”
“Yeah, that is where it gets complicated. He has no problem with women in the workplace, or the whole equality stuff, but I guess he knows …me.”
Okay, now he was more confused than ever.
“Your father knows you, and this upsets him?” Luca asked.
She chuckled. “No, it doesn’t upset him that he knows me. What upsets him is that I …decided to help the company rather than pursue what I wanted.”
Now this did surprise him.
“I thought your father sent you to help soften me up,” Luca said.
“No, Dad didn’t know. David didn’t know. Nor did Uncle Ed. I just, I read about what you didto other companies, and I know how many you have torn apart. I did all the research.”
“And you helped keep the company whole. Trust me, I would have torn it apart to find out what worked and what didn’t, but that doesn’t explain why your father is disappointed.”
She stirred the sauce again. “My grandparents had the perfect, or at least it felt perfect to me, marriage.”
“Okay.”
She took a deep breath and then blew it out. “When I was a kid, my mom wanted to enter me into all these beauty pageants, and I did it for her but I hated it. David told me to tell Dad how I felt, soI did, and he put a stop to it. Mom and I didn’t get along so well after that. So I spent a lot of time with my grandparents. Most of all my grandmother.”
Luca nodded.
“My grandparents had a strong marriage, but my grandmother was a stay-at-home mother. She helped support my granddad by being there for him, by doing everything else for him, and you know, being his rock where she needed to be. They had the perfect marriage and were a united front. No one could come between them. Dad knows that was the kind of marriage I wanted. Ever since I was little, I wanted a marriage like that. To find a husband who loved me, who wanted me to be his rock.” She breathed out. “I didn’t want a flashy career, or to go chasing some other dream, being the first woman to do this or that. I wanted to be a wife, a mother, and to make a home. I know it isn’t as thrilling as what other women hope for, but it’s what I wanted. Dad wanted more for me. He’d hoped I would be by my brother’s side, helping with the company, but it doesn’t work that way.”
Luca looked at her and he noticed she wasn’t quite meeting his eyes.
“Dad didn’t like that he couldn’t give me my dream, and he was upset with that.He doesn’t know how my marriage with you would go, and I guess he feels guilty about it all.”
She finally glanced up and Luca couldn’t help but look at her.
“What?” she asked. “Please, Luca, say something.”
“You only ever wanted to be a wife and mother?”
“Yes.”
“You’re sure?”
She laughed, but it was a forced one that didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Yes, I’m sure. I told you, being around my grandmother, I loved her life, but then Grandpa loved her, and she loved him. They had a wonderful marriage.”
Luca heard exactly what she wasn’t saying. Her grandparents had a happy marriage because they wanted to be married, while they did not.He crossed his arms over his chest and looked at her, really looked at her.
It would explain why therewas not a lot of information about her in the public eye. He couldn’t help but wonder if her father was embarrassed by her. Where the whole world talked about equal opportunities and women having the same as men, equal pay, his own daughter just wanted to stay home.
Luca wasn’t disappointed in what she’d told him. He was intrigued. In all honesty, untilTillie had walked into his office a few months ago, he never planned to get married. He didn’t trust women. Tillie was different. From the moment she walked into his office, he couldn’t deny his overwhelming need to possess her, to take her as his.
He didn’t know the first thing about being a husband. In his life, he’d not seen many happy, loving couples, just men and women who would gladly use children to make a quick buck.
This certainly opened something up for the two of them. “Why don’t we try it?” Luca asked.
“Try what?” Tillie was a little distracted as she carried her large pot of boiling water over to the sink and began to drain it.
“Being married.”
She finished draining the pasta and poured it back into the pot before returning to the stove. “I don’t knowwhat you mean. We are married.”
“I know, but we’ve not been acting like it, have we? We’ve been living pretty much separate lives. You spend a lot of your time in the kitchen and wandering the house. I go to work, I come home, and we’re apart.”
“Yeah, but I figured that was what you wanted.”
Luca had never been open with anyone, but he had a feeling he could trust Tillie. She was, after all, his wife.
“Look, Tillie, I’ve never been married. I don’t even know whatmarriage is supposed to mean. I’m trying my best with what I know, and trust me, it’s not a lot.” He ran fingers through his hair, and then in that moment he knew he needed to tell her about himself.
****
Tillie finished preparing their meal, and was still a little taken aback by the fact Luca was there, helping. Other than their wedding day, and of course the day in his office where she decided to make the change, they’d never shared a meal. Oh, there was also today at lunch, but for some reason, that didn’t seem to count. Her father’s disappointment put a damper on everything.
They moved into the dining room, and she noted Luca putting her food on the place next to his.He held her chair out for her, and she lowered down and offered him a smile before he took his seat. She waited for him to pick up his fork, and then when they were both ready, they started to dig into their meal.
Luca reached out, and she didn’t pull away from him as he wrapped his fingers around her hand and held onto her.
“I was never raised in a loving home, nor the same home for long periods of time. I was moved around.”
She didn’t dare speak. There was not a lot of personal information about Luca online, only what he was prepared to do when it came to the business side of everything. She waited patiently.
“I was in the foster system. I don’t know who my parents were.By the time I got out, I wasn’t interested in looking for them. I decided if they didn’t care about me and were willing to leave me in that place, then I didn’t need to know who they were.”
Tillie held ontohis hand as best she could, trying to show him support.
“Some of the kids got adopted and I believe went on to have amazing lives. I wasn’t so lucky. I was neverchosen by parents and I was moved from place to place, never getting the home they always told me I would. At least, that’s what they told us when we were kids, not so much as teenagers. I think it became common knowledge that no one wanted teenagers, and they were right. Some of us got chosen, others didn’t.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“I don’t need pity,”he said. He didn’t sound cruel or mean, just being honest, and she could live with that.
She couldn’t imagine growing up like that. She had a lot of difficulty with her mother because they wanted different things, but it wasn’t hard. Awkward at times, but nowhere near what Luca described.
“I’m not offering you pity,” she said. “It’s awful what you must have gone through.”
“It made me what I am today. From a young age, I knew I couldn’t rely on anyone, so I didn’t.”
Tillie wanted to tell him that it couldn’t have been a great way to grow up, or to feel. She’d witnessed true love with her grandparents, and lived in a good home. Her parents, although not on the same level, loved one another. She was close with her brother. She couldn’t imagine waking up every day knowing you weren’t wanted.
“You weren’t close to anyone in the system?” she asked.
“None. A lot of time, the kids were just trying to survive. Some ran away, others hoped to get adopted. It wasn’t always a good place to be. I don’t know if it’s like that for everyone, but it was for me. I learned to take care of myself, and then when I got out, I had a plan.”
“You became a self-made billionaire.”
“I had an idea, and I ran with it. It has helpedme get where I am today. I take things that are falling apart, and I seem to be able to fix them. Bring it back together. It’s what I do.” He stopped and Tillie gave him the space so he could think clearly. “I don’t know what it means to be a husband, or to be what you want, but what I’m offering you is the chance to try. That is all I know.”
“You want to be my husband?” Tillie asked.
“I am your husband, but I don’t want us to keep going the way we are. When I come home, I want to be able to touch my wife. To not be afraid of hurting her.”
Tears filled her eyes, she couldn’t help it. Did he even realize how … emotional he sounded. How concerned and full of love?
“I had no idea you were a virgin. If I’d known, I’d have done things differently.”
“Stop,” Tillie said. “It doesn’t matter.”
“I hurt you that night,and it was never my intention.”
“You didn’t know and I didn’t tell you. It seemed kind of personal.”
He laughed. “And you didn’t think to tell your husband?”
“You were a stranger, and do you think you would have believed me?” she asked.
He sat back just a little and then nodded his head. “Touché. You’re right. There is a chance I wouldn’t have believed you.”
Tillie smiled. “Is it me, or does it feel like we’re making progress?”
He laughed. “I don’t know, but I want to touch you, Tillie, and kiss you. I don’t want to hold back.”
She took a deep breath and slowly blew it out. “I … I don’t want you to cheat on me. I’d like to try and have a good marriage.” She was trying not to get overly excited. She didn’t know what had changed his mind, but she was willing to take whatever he had to offer.
Tillie couldn’t help but think of her grandparents. Theyfell in love at first sight. She didn’t think their relationship was quite on the same scale, but at least they were talking to each other civilly, so they had that.
“I won’t cheat. If you read the prenup, there’s a clause in it that states in the event of infidelity, the company reverts back to you, and I will help it to thrive, and you will never have to worry about anything ever again.”
“What?” Tillie hadn’t read the prenuptial agreement. It had been another matter where her father was annoyed with her, also the family lawyer.
Without his presence, she’d taken the piece of paper and signed it. Probably one of the single most idiotic things to do, as her father had stated Luca could have demanded everything and anything, but she had a little trust. A tiny amount, but it was there.
“You didn’t read it at all, did you?”
“No. I … I wanted to help the people who worked for my father. They didn’t deserve to suffer because of something we did.”
Luca tightened his grip around her hand. “I won’t cheat on you.”
And Tillie knew she was never going to cheat on him either.
She didn’t know what was going to change, but she couldn’t help feeling a little excited about the future.