Chapter 34
Chapter Thirty-four
Alice
I had always understood horses were large, but until I sat perched on top of Hellion, I hadn’t quite grasped how large. From up here, the ground looked much farther away than I’d ever imagined, and the animal under me shifted like she had her own opinions about my being there.
“Hellion?” I gave Caleb a sharp look, tightening my grip on the reins. “I have to say, I don’t find her name reassuring. Is this a prank?”
He chuckled as he stood at my knee, one broad hand stroking the horse’s neck. This was all second nature to him. He’d been riding horses since he could walk, and they lived in what was essentially his backyard. I had to remind myself he was the expert, and in his hands, I was safe.
“Not a prank, darlin’. Her mama was a wild one. We expected Hells to take after her, but she’s as gentle as they come.” He squeezed my calf and slid his hand up to my hip, stroking me the same way he had the horse. “I wouldn’t let you up there if I thought for a second you weren’t safe.”
“I know,” I whispered. Because I did. I trusted Caleb completely, and Hellion seemed like she didn’t mind me being on her back too much. “I’m farther off the ground than I’d been anticipating.”
That made him laugh again. “And you’re going to stay up there until you’re ready to get down.”
Then he swung up onto his own horse, Brick—short for Brick House.
A mountain of muscle and dark hide that made Hellion look like a pony.
My nerves scattered, forgotten. All I could see was Caleb in the saddle, the brim of his hat low, thighs gripping leather, shoulders straight.
Pure cowboy. My cowboy. As natural as could be.
Like he’d been born to sit in that saddle.
“Wow,” I breathed.
He cocked his head. “Why’re you looking at me that way?”
My cheeks were hot, and it had nothing to do with the afternoon sun. “You look like you belong on the cover of one of Mrs. Taylor’s favorite cowboy romances.”
He chuffed and patted his middle. “I think this disqualifies me. Don’t those guys have at least an eight-pack? I’m a few short.”
I bit my bottom lip, taking all of him in. “Believe me, Cay, you’re not missing anything.”
His gaze swept over me. “As long as I’m the right fit for you, nothing else matters to me. Besides, I think I can live without being one of Mrs. Taylor’s fantasies.”
I giggled. “I think I can live without that too. You’ll just be mine.”
He groaned. “Are you trying to get out of this ride by making me want to take you in the barn and sort you out?”
“Well, I wasn’t, but if you’d rather…”
“Not a chance, Allie-girl. We’re taking our ride.” His eyes never left mine as he lifted his reins. “We’ll see about sorting you out afterward.”
Caleb led Hells and me down a path designed for children.
It was smooth and level, no jutting rocks to climb over, no hills to traverse.
Eventually, I was able to relax and enjoy the smooth ride atop my horse, due in part to Hellion’s calm nature, but also because I was distracted by my view of Caleb in front of me.
There might have come a day when the sheer breadth of his shoulders didn’t take my breath away, but today wasn’t it. Especially not while watching him control the horse under him, who, to my untrained eye, was easily double Hellion’s size.
We followed the trail until it opened to a narrow stretch of river. Sunlight glittered off the surface of the water, drawing me closer. Caleb swung down first, tying his horse to a nearby branch. Then he came to my side, steadying me with both hands as I slid awkwardly to the ground.
The moment my boots hit dirt, my legs wobbled, tingling and half-dead from gripping the saddle. “Oops,” I muttered, trying to shake them back to life.
Caleb didn’t laugh or tease. Right there in front of me, he crouched down, his big hands smoothing over my thighs and cupping the curve of my butt as he tipped his head back to examine my face.
“Are you sore?” he asked. Serious. As if this were a medical exam and not him being unbearably sweet and distracting.
“A little,” I whispered, heat flooding my cheeks. “I think I’ll survive.”
He gave my backside a squeeze. “You will. The more you ride, the more you’ll get used to using these muscles.”
“I guess I’ll have to, having a cowboy for a boyfriend.”
“That’s right,” he chuckled. Leaning forward, he placed a kiss on my belly button. “My pretty little darlin’s going to be a cowgirl yet.”
Satisfied I wasn’t broken, he rose and guided me to a wide, flat boulder overlooking the water. We sat together, so close my leg was almost on top of his. That was where he’d put me, where he wanted me, and I had no objections.
After a while of listening to the river's quiet flow, Caleb reached for my hand and brought it to rest on his thigh. My heart stuttered, and warmth pooled low in my stomach. I leaned into him and laid my head on his shoulder.
The last few weeks with Caleb had been the sweetest stretch of my life.
He’d made me laugh until my stomach hurt, touched me with a possessiveness that never left me doubting, and proved over and over the reticent man who’d once turned me away was long gone.
Caleb Kelly was all in with me—unapologetically, wholeheartedly—and he showed it in every word, every look, every action.
He’d folded me into his little world with Jesse like it was no big deal. They’d taught me to fish but never made me bait my own hooks. We’d cooked dinner together, sharing the prep and cleanup duties. We’d had quiet moments, but mostly silly, happy, laughing times.
For a woman who had lived most of her life feeling invisible, being seen by this man was a revelation.
To him, I wasn’t glass, but he still treated me like I was something valuable and delicate.
He checked on me on the days we didn’t see each other and thoroughly scoured me with his eyes when I was in his arms.
Things were changing, but I wasn’t afraid anymore.
“Before I headed here, I stopped at Joy’s to pick up my paycheck and we had a talk.” I traced little patterns on the back of Caleb’s hand where it still covered mine.
He made a low sound of acknowledgment. “Oh yeah?”
“She fired me.”
That got him. Caleb’s shoulder shook under my cheek as he barked out a laugh. He angled his head down at me, eyebrows raised in disbelief. “Come again?”
“I’m not kidding. She fired me. I’m no longer her employee.” I turned my face toward him, the corners of my mouth twitching. “She hired a new waitress to replace me this week and told me it was time I had a life of my own. She also said I’m not allowed in the bar unless I’m a paying customer.”
He shook his head. “Wow. I gotta say, I didn’t see that coming.”
“Can’t say I did either. Then again, this is classic Joy. She’s not one for heart-to-hearts. She shows her affection through blunt force.”
That got him to chuckle. “Have to admit, I’m not real sorry about this. You worked too much, and I’d like to claim as many of your free evenings as I can.” His amusement transitioned into concern. “I know you liked your job, though. How do you feel about not working there anymore?”
I thought about my answer for a while, watching the river glisten as it ambled by.
Then I leaned closer, pressing into the solid wall of his body, and tilted my face up to catch his gaze.
“I think she’s right. It’s time.” My lips curved before I added, “I will miss spending my evenings there, though.”
“You don’t have to worry about that.” He swept my hair off my face and cupped my jaw. “Any time you want to go, I’ll take you. It’ll be a nice change to have you sitting at the table with me instead of scribbling on your little notepad and running away.”
I gasped. “I haven’t run away from you in a long time.”
“You haven’t.” He took my chin between two fingers. “And you’re not going to ever again.”
After we finished our ride, we made dinner together then curled up on Caleb’s couch. He was reading to me, but he kept stumbling over his words, to the point I wasn’t certain he knew what he was saying.
I placed my hand on his arm, bringing him to a stop. “What’s up, Cay? Seems like you’re not into the story tonight.”
With a sigh, he put the book down in his lap and scratched behind his ear—a sure sign something was on his mind.
“Yeah. I guess I’m not. I’m loathe to admit it, but Kent’s visit got under my skin.” He took my hand in his and toyed with my fingers as he frowned. “A while back, Shelby told me she wants to move her and Jesse to Denver with Kent.”
I hissed a breath. “I hope you shut that down.”
“Of course I did.” His troubled gaze swept to mine. “I don’t want him leaving. Ever, if it were up to me. I’m smart enough to get that’s not a possibility. But in the back of my mind, there’s some niggling doubt. Should I have allowed it? He’d have a lot more resources available to him in Denver—”
“Caleb, no. Jesse is thriving here, and you know that. His education is important, sure, but what he gets living with his family, on this land, is just as valuable, if not more. You’re letting him spread his wings this summer, and he’s safe to do that, knowing he can come back to his nest when it’s over. ”
He laid his head back on the cushions and groaned. “I know you’re right. I’ve been telling myself the same thing. So why am I still questioning it? Why is parenting such a mindfuck all the time?”
Pushing up on my knees, I climbed onto his lap and slid my fingers through his hair.
“I’ve never been a parent, so I don’t know.
But I think it’s a good sign you’re regularly tortured with uncertainty.
That means you care deeply about your son, and you’re willing to drive yourself crazy getting it right. ”
“Tortured is right.” He wrapped his arms around me, pulling me against his chest and running his nose along the side of my head. “What else can I do for him? If he wanted to play football or join the 4-H, I’d have no problem, but I don’t know the first thing about robots or science.”
I almost laughed, but held it in. Now wasn’t the time.
“He gets robots and science at school and the library, honey. With you, he gets all your knowledge of running a large ranch, land as far as the eye can see, animals and fishing any time he wants, and a family who sees him as someone important and vital. You’re sending him out into the world with all that, and I have to say, he’s better off than most kids.
Even those who go to science academies and take college courses starting in middle school. ”
He let out a long sigh but kept his eyes narrowed on me. “You’ll tell me if I miss something, right? If I get too myopic and don’t see an opportunity I should be giving him?”
My chest swelled with emotion. Him asking me to do that when he’d been angry at me for the same thing a couple months ago only highlighted how drastically things between us had changed. We were in this together. He trusted me and my judgment. I was part of his life, and that included his son.
“I don’t think that’ll happen, but yes, I promise to tell you when you’re screwing up.”
He chuffed. “Appreciate it, darlin’. I need my girl to keep me humble and on my toes.” Then he pressed a kiss to the side of my head. “Thank you for reminding me of what I’m giving him. Means a lot to me you see that.”
“It’s true. And I’ll keep reminding you. As many times as it takes.”
He gave a low hum, his arms tightening around me until I could feel the steady beat of his heart against my cheek. We stayed like that for a while, his big hands sliding up and down my back, mine tracing lazy circles along his shoulders and chest.
After a long silence, he murmured into my hair, “You’re going to be a great mom when you’re ready, Alice.”
The words and certainty behind them hit deep. My throat tightened as I tilted my head to meet his eyes. “I want that,” I whispered back, the admission catching on my breath.
His gaze was as soft as a feather brushing over my skin, but his voice was firm. “Then I’ll make sure you get it.”
I sank against him again, letting the weight of his promise settle in my bones. It was too soon for us to be making commitments like that, but right now, in his arms, it didn’t feel that way. Not even a little bit.