Chapter 19
Chapter Nineteen
ZOEY
“ Y ou and Matt gave us quite the show,” Rosie muses as she froths milk. “Even through the rain, everybody could see you two eating each other’s faces.”
“Gross.” I tighten the blanket she gave me around my shoulders. My clothes are still wet, but at least my teeth stopped chattering. “What are you doing here?” I ask as she moves behind the counter of the Brookhaven café where Matt and I took refuge.
It’s the first real conversation we’ve had since the town hall, and… fuck, I can’t believe she’s actually talking to me. No awkwardness, no deadly glare. Just Rosie being her welcoming self.
“I own this place too,” she says with a hint of pride in her voice. “I’m here every Wednesday to help my crew with the market rush.”
My brows rise. “I didn’t know you had more than one coffee shop. That’s impressive.” I envy her for having found something she’s so deeply passionate about. “What is it that you like so much? Why coffee?”
“Hmm.” She wipes down the frother with a rag. “It’s less about coffee and more about helping people with their day, you know what I mean? I like that I’m the one they come to in order to feel better.” She laughs, her cheeks flushing. “Wow, that makes it sound like I’m handing out blowjobs.”
I raise my hands. “Hey, no judgment here.”
“What I meant,” she says, batting at stray hairs that have fallen into her face, “is that I make it my mission to ensure that the people who come in here, whether they’re strangers or locals, leave happier than when they arrived.” She frowns. “That still doesn’t sound better.”
“I get it.” I chuckle. “You’re very lucky to have found a career that pulls you out of bed every morning.”
Her smile dims. “Haven’t you?”
“It’s… complicated.” I glance over at Matt.
“Ah.” Rosie scrutinizes me, sighing with a heaviness that screams understanding. “Does ‘complicated’ have another name?”
I fight a grin. “Maybe?”
“He came at you a bit hard at the town hall meeting last week. I was disappointed too, by the way. That you lied to me.”
“Technically, I didn’t lie ,” I say, though my heart sinks. “More like omitted the truth?”
She pins me with a look that makes my cheeks heat.
“It had nothing to do with you, I swear.” I tighten my hold on my blanket again.
“If I had been open on why I came to Pine Falls before I got a chance to explain, I wouldn’t have gone very far.
But…” I trace a finger along the countertop.
“I felt awful about it. I was scared that I’d messed up our friendship before it could even properly start. ”
“I was mad, yes,” she says. “But once I heard people talking about you and everything you’ve done for us in only a matter of days, I came around. I was just waiting for you to take the first step.”
I reach across the counter and rest my hand on hers. “I’m sorry. I won’t lie to you anymore. Promise.”
Giving me a small nod, she steps away, grabbing two mugs from a shelf.
“So, back to you and Matt. I was surprised to see you two at Cooper’s last Saturday.
And when I heard you were dating ? It didn’t make any sense.
I almost thought you were using him to get to us. I was ready to fight.” She laughs.
I laugh with her, in a “can you imagine?” way, but deep down, I’m freaking the fuck out.
You just said you wouldn’t lie to her again. What the fuck is wrong with you?
Cups filled, she slides one in front of me.
“I don’t know what happened between you two since the town hall, but that chemistry outside?
” she whistles. “That was piping hot. Can’t fake that.
” Leaning against the counter, she nods to Matt.
“You know, I never thought I’d see him this happy again. You’re good for him.”
“He’s good for me too,” I say without missing a beat.
Guilt swells inside me faster than the tiny speck of joy her words bring, and suddenly, the enormity of what we’re doing hits me.
We’ve been lying to these people since day one. It didn’t bother me much at first. I figured they liked him fine. That his business made him somewhat more influential than others, and that was the end of it.
But it’s so much more than that.
They adore him. He’s a pillar of this community. Their lives are tightly woven together, bound by a genuine care for one another.
And they’re watching him “fall in love” again like he’s their son or their brother. And they are so proud and relieved that he seems to have moved on from the hell Andie put him through.
I should have realized that before I let Matt rope me into this. Now, we’re too far gone. When we inevitably “split,” not only are they gonna think Matt is heartbroken, but they’ll be heartbroken for him too.
Fuck.
“Keep it PG in here, okay?” Rosie says. “There are kids around.”
Nose scrunched, I grab the coffees. “Guess I’ll save the R-rated stuff for later, then.”
“Tell Matt I’m terribly sorry,” she throws out as I shuffle toward our table.
At the sight of him, his hair tousled from the rain, his shirt plastered to his chest, my pulse spikes, the same way it did when he kissed me senseless.
That kiss turned my world upside down. Reoriented my north to my south, tipped my sense of gravity toward his. Even weaving between the chairs of the café is a challenge, because my mind is still spinning.
It wasn’t a casual kiss. I know it. He knows it. But now what?
“Rosie sends her apologies,” I say when I set our coffees down.
Matt frowns as I settle into the booth across from him, his mug already at his lips. “Why?”
“She cockblocked you.”
He chokes on his sip.
“Said our PDA was too graphic for the kids,” I add, amused.
“I didn’t think we had an audience.”
“The whole café, apparently.” I waggle my brows. Yes, I’m deflecting. If I don’t, I’ll spiral, replaying the admission he blurted out before he dove for my mouth.
That none of it has been pretend for him. It simply doesn’t make sense.
Or maybe I’m not ready to accept that it does.
“Don’t,” he says, watching me.
“What?” I shoot back.
A shadow crosses his face, yet his gaze remains on me as he says, “Don’t downplay this.”
“Why?”
He raises a brow. “Why? Because there was nothing fake about that kiss, Zoey. Just so we’re clear.”
Why is it so hard for you to believe him? Why do you always self-sabotage?
And how does he read me so well?
“It doesn’t make sense, though,” I start. “I’m not… I mean, you saw what I—” I huff, scrambling to find the right words.
His attention doesn’t falter.
Nothing remotely coherent is coming to me, so I give up. “It’s just… why?”
With a soft chuckle, he sits back in his chair. But his expression sobers when he sees I’m being serious. “Why what?”
“Why would you want to have anything to do with me?” My voice cracks on the last word.
The moment the question leaves me, I glance down at my fingers wrapped around the mug, wishing I could take it back. That single sentence was loaded with way too much baggage.
“Are you on some sort of public-enemy list that would make me liking you a very questionable choice?” He gasps. “Am I attracted to a criminal ?”
Liking you. Attracted .
He’s throwing these out so casually, like they don’t shake me to my core.
I keep reminding myself not to let my guard down, that at any moment, the other shoe will drop. But then he says stuff like that, and the idea of protecting my heart sounds like a joke I’m only playing on myself.
“No, no, of course not,” I huff out. I try to regain my footing, but the floor is still wobbling under my feet.
Liking you. Attracted .
“Then why would it be so surprising that my feelings could be real?” he asks, his voice weakened by the vulnerability he’s offering me.
“Maybe because the men in my life have always shown me that they’re incapable of handling me,” I blurt before I can think better of it.
So why should Matt be willing to?
Actually, no, why would he? Of his own free will?
Nah. I work my ass off and have very little time to give to others. It wasn’t enough for Jake or any of the insecure men I dated before, so why would it be for Matt?
Though… In the last two weeks, I’ve hardly done any work.
Come to think of it, the “work” I’ve done has consisted solely of spending time with Matt to get into the town’s good graces.
I can spin that any way I want, say I’m doing it to get the lodge off the ground, to convince my father I can take over, to woo the shareholders.
The list goes on. I’ve got all the excuses in the world.
But the reality is that being with Matt is effortless.
It doesn’t feel like work at all. And every morning, I wake up wondering what new things he’ll show me and how I can make the most of this limited time with him.
I don’t know whether this version of me has always been there, waiting to be coaxed out by him, or if it’s who I’ve become around him, but either way, it’s freeing. To expose another side of me, the side that exists outside my work. The side that’s been muzzled for too long.
I hope you’ll find someone worth your time one day.
The words Jake spat at me seconds before slamming the door behind him echo in my head.
At that moment, I’d rolled my eyes, angry at his inability to recognize that he was the one who’d put us in this situation by cheating.
But now, as I study Matt, who’s still mulling over what I said, those words take on a new light.
“Is that what they made you believe? That you were too much to handle?” he asks, breaking the silence. The weight of his gaze makes me shift in my chair.
“I come with a lot of baggage, and by baggage, I mean my job. I barely have time for myself, let alone for a partner. They get tired of it.”
“Did—” He gives a vague swirl of his hand. “All those men—by the way,” he says too casually, “how many are we talking about? Ballpark.”
The tightness in my chest eases a notch. His curiosity regarding how many men I’ve slept with gives me more satisfaction than it should. “Not that many. Less than a hundred.”