Chapter 7
Ashia
“Okay, great. Thank you so much. We’ll have everything ready by the time you get here.
” I pull the phone away to hang up and text Alex an update before I drop it in my lap.
He’s been worried sick about Damien, and he keeps asking for new information—even though he should be focusing on Trina.
I knew he would have FOMO when we sent him home, but he needs rest too, and there wasn’t much he could do here while Damien was unconscious.
Now that he’s awake and lucid, though, Alex is getting fidgety. I can tell from his texts alone.
The therapist sounded nice enough. I was a little surprised when she didn’t want details before she agreed, but I’m assuming Leanne answered her questions when she initially contacted her.
Apparently, a part of her training was John and Leanne’s case.
So, it helps that she’s at least familiar with the Italians already.
I hope it’ll be beneficial for Damien, but there’s also the question of whether he’ll even speak to her.
I keep glancing towards the back door, hoping he’s okay.
He hasn’t screamed, and there haven’t been any gunshots, so I’m taking that as a good sign.
A part of me was worried that he would lash out at John, but it seems by the lack of commotion, that hasn’t happened yet.
Leanne is still in the kitchen, but she’s moving slowly to try and not make any harsh sounds.
Thankfully, even Daisy settled down after he came back inside the first time.
She’s lying in the corner of the room, taking a nap.
“What do we need to do to get ready for the therapist?” Zeke asks as he sits on the other side of the couch. He was in the office with Carter, helping him with the security system again, and when I heard them order twelve new cameras, I stopped listening in on them.
“We’ll need to get another room ready, since she’s going to be staying here while she conducts his sessions. Well, two I guess, unless she’s going to use Damien’s office to talk to him.”
“Why is she staying here?”
“Apparently she wants to see how he acts in a normal setting.”
“Is anything about what we do normal?” he jokes, and I can’t help but chuckle.
“No. No, it’s not. But I guess she means ‘normal for us.’”
“Do we even have another room or two?” He cocks a brow, and now I’m stumped.
Between Damien and I’s room, Zeke, Carter, Ser, now John and Leanne, Victoria—I groan even just thinking of her—and just in case Alex does insist on coming back, I’m not so sure.
I didn’t realize how many people we actually had staying here recently.
“I think so. Once Damien is done with the bedroom down here, that’ll open more space, too.”
“There’s too many damn people in this house.” Zeke sprouts a grin.
“I second that. Hopefully another person will leave soon,” I say hatefully, implying Victoria. As I focus again from rolling my eyes, I notice Zeke’s grin has vanished, and he seems to have that blank stare again. “Are you okay?” I ask him.
“Yeah, I'm alright. I’ve just been thinking a lot since we got D back. I have to figure out what I’m going to do once I get rid of the apartment,” he says lowly, and I hate the way the back of my neck tingles.
“What do you mean?”
He looks back at me with creases on his forehead and a sly grin.
“I can’t live with you guys forever, Ash.”
“Well, maybe not forever, but there’s nothing to figure out.
You can stay here as long as you want. You know that, right?
” I don’t even want to think of Zeke living by himself again.
If I’m being honest with myself, I don’t want him to ever be alone again.
The thought of him diving back into that dark place in his mind is too much for me to handle.
I don’t want to think that he’ll try to kill himself again…
“I know, but what am I supposed to do with all of the furniture and shit? There’s no use in having that apartment for a storage unit.”
“You don’t have to do that yet, Zeke. You have some time until the lease is up.”
“No, I need to. Tay’s mom took all of her stuff anyway, so it’s just filled with my belongings, collecting dust.”
Anger rolls over me, and that tingling behind my neck moves down to my chest. First, Taylor’s mom wouldn’t let him attend the funeral, and now she just took everything without asking him?
My mind reels, trying to process it. I sit up a little straighter and grip the couch cushion, ready to raise hell.
“What?! She took all of her stuff? When?”
“Well, not all of it. She left all of our pictures, and I have one of her hoodies that you grabbed for me, but most of that is already here. Her mom is driving her car back, so I’m guessing she’s already left.
” He fidgets with his fingers, and I hate how this grief is still attacking him.
Now that Damien is home, and he doesn’t have an excuse to run from his anger, it’s time we focus on his well-being as well.
I’m not going to let him fall back into that decaying mindset.
“I'm, uh, going to talk to Doctor Von about seeing you, too,” I say softly, almost afraid of his reaction, and his head snaps in my direction, ready to fight back. “You tried to kill yourself less than two months ago, Zeke. Now that you’re not on a constant mission of taking care of me, your mind is going to wander again. I can’t lose you, okay?
Damien can’t handle losing you. Please? I just…
I want to make sure you’re okay, too.” He squints his eyes at me like he’s going to immediately retort, but I cut back in.
“If she evaluates you and says you’re fine, then you don’t have to, but it’s there for you if you need it. ”
“What about you? Are you going to talk to her?” he inquires genuinely. I swallow harshly before I respond, knowing he’s going to use this as ammunition.
“I’d rather not.”
He tilts his head to the side and crosses his arms in obvious annoyance.
“Oh, so I need therapy, but you don’t?”
Yep, I knew it.
“I didn’t say that,” I chuckle. “I think we both know I need counseling.”
“Then why not talk to her?”
I hesitate, because I know how ridiculous I’m going to sound. Out of everything else we have to worry about, my mind should be thinking of other things. From the moment Leanne handed me that card, though, this has been on my mind.
“Okay, you’re going to think this is stupid, but she’s been a lot more active lately.
” I poke my belly. “And around twenty weeks, babies can start to hear things outside of the womb. I’ll be twenty-one weeks soon, and I don’t want her to hear what happened to us while her brain’s developing.
It’s not like she can understand anything, but still, it just—”
“That’s not stupid, Ash. That’s actually really sweet.
” His eyes flicker with something that’s almost endearment, and the same feeling rolls in my chest. He reaches out and pats my leg, reassuring me.
“But it wouldn’t hurt if we all talked to the doctor.
These past few months have really taken a toll on everyone, and you’re not exempt from that.
” He pulls his hand away, and I nod in silent agreement.
I look down at my hands while I play with the sleeve of this shirt, thinking everything over, when Zeke releases a playful sigh.
He shrugs like he’s just brushing off the heavy conversation, and I focus back on him.
“I'm sure everything will be fine, though. Hey, maybe she’s deaf. Then she won’t hear anything. ”
My jaw drops.
“Jesus, Zeke!” I slap his arm. He just laughs as I shake my head playfully in disapproval. “She’s not deaf,” I proclaim.
“How do you know, smart-ass? Maybe I'm right for a change.”
“Well, first thing is that’s a shitty thing to be right about, and secondly…
” I pause, giving me enough time to gather the courage to say it, and for him to stop laughing.
My body relaxes just at the thought of what I’m about to admit, and a warm feeling overtakes me.
“Because she gets excited when Damien talks.”
I smile softly, and Zeke instantly stops laughing. A genuine grin dawns on his face, and that look of fondness shines through his eyes again. If he doesn’t stop looking at me like that, I might just start crying. So, I look back at my sleeves.
“I know how crazy that sounds,” I interject before he can make some bullshit, brotherly comment.
“And it could be my hormones playing tricks on me, but I’ve noticed it the past few days.
Even when he was having his spells, and he would talk to himself or shout, she would start moving more.
Before he went outside, I swear she was kicking one of my organs, reacting to him.
” I can’t help but giggle, and shockingly, he laughs with me, like he doesn’t think it’s so ridiculous after all.
“She knows her daddy,” he says proudly, and I can’t help but smile even wider.
“Yeah… Yeah, I think she does.” I lift my gaze to meet his shit-eating grin just before he looks out to the hallway. There’s a smugness to his face that wasn’t there just a second ago, and I can’t help but narrow my eyes at him, wondering what he’s feeling so satisfied about.
“Hey, D,” Zeke says just as confidently, and goosebumps instantly prickle along my body.
I turn my head in the same direction, and my heart almost beats out of my chest. Damien is leaning against the wall, listening in.
He doesn't seem as angry as he was before, but now he looks upset, like a new sadness is breaking through.
“Hey, baby.” I sit up a little straighter, hoping he’ll feel comfortable enough to sit down beside me. His lips curl into a soft, heartbreaking half-grin before he pushes off the wall and walks directly over to me. “Are you okay? Do you need some—"