Chapter 21
Callie
From beneath my lashes, I steal a glance at River.
He’s smiling at Nora like she hung the moon in the sky, completely captivated by the way she insists on feeding herself.
Her fist is wrapped around the handle of her fork as she stabs noodles and tender bites of beef with toddler-like determination.
There’s sauce on her chin, cheek, even eyelashes, but he doesn’t seem to mind.
If anything, he looks enchanted. As if she can do no wrong.
Why can’t I stop staring?
Even when I force myself to refocus on the plate in front of me, my gaze unconsciously drifts back to him. It’s easier to watch River when he’s so wrapped up in Nora and doesn’t notice me looking.
It’s just another thing that makes this situation feel dangerous.
The way he so effortlessly rearranged his life and opened his home to us. The quiet rhythm we’ve slipped into. The shared dinners and laughter, along with the warmth that’s sprung up between us. The way he moves through his space like it was always meant to include us in it.
It shouldn’t feel this easy.
Nothing in my life has felt this simple in years.
I twirl my fork through the noodles, trying to shake off the heaviness pressing down on me.
When I can’t take another moment, I glance across the table at him again and am shocked by the words that tumble out. “You’re going to spoil me.”
They sound more like an accusation.
He doesn’t miss a beat. “That’s the plan.”
I reach for my glass of water, needing something to keep me from totally unraveling. The coolness grounds me, but only for a moment. I take a sip and try to swallow the feelings that are starting to take root inside me like stubborn weeds.
Nora babbles to herself between bites, already seeming completely comfortable in this new place.
In this new life.
With River.
I never expected her to adjust so quickly or with such ease.
After dinner, I busy myself in the kitchen, clearing plates and loading the dishwasher.
Every few minutes, I peek into the living room out of habit.
I’ve grown so used to multitasking. Working, cleaning, and parenting.
There’s never a time when I’m fully off-duty.
It’s strange and a little unsettling to know that my daughter is being cared for by someone who isn’t me.
Or my parents.
I catch sight of them at the window. River’s holding Nora in his arms and pointing out the glittering skyline. Her hand is pressed against the glass, no doubt leaving behind smudges and tiny fingerprints. Instead of flinching or correcting her, he just lets her be.
And that affects me in a way I don’t have words for.
This impossibly steady, gentle, quietly protective man is unlike anyone I’ve ever known. The more I let myself feel it, the more I realize how desperately I want to believe it’s real.
Even if I’m not sure if I should.
All right, that’s not totally true. Steele Sanderson is like that.
The man is hopelessly devoted and utterly obsessed.
He’s been in love with Lilah for a decade.
That much has always been obvious to anyone with eyes.
It was only a matter of time before he stopped pretending otherwise and made his feelings known.
And honestly?
I love that for her.
My friend deserves someone who looks at her like she hung the stars. A man who shows up without question and stands by her side no matter what.
Steele is going to be an incredible father. You can see it in the way he’s already taking care of Lilah and planning their future. He has quiet strength and unwavering loyalty to those he loves.
It’s a rare find these days.
I would be lying if I didn’t admit to being a teeny bit jealous.
Not in a bitter way, just wistful. Like I’m watching someone live out the dream I once had for myself, only to see it crumble before it could come true.
By the time I finish cleaning up the kitchen, Nora and River are curled up on the couch. The TV plays a movie at low volume, casting a muted glow over the room. Nora’s nestled against him, her head resting on his thigh like it’s the most natural thing in the world.
I settle beside her on the other side of the couch, careful not to disturb the moment. The three of us, side by side, in a home that’s not really mine. And yet, the scene unfolding around me feels domestic in a way that’s foreign.
This is exactly what I used to picture back when I was pregnant and still foolishly believed Zane would rise to the occasion. That he’d love our unborn baby the way I already did. That we’d build a life together, a family, a home.
But he never showed up.
Not in the ways that mattered.
River, though?
He didn’t just show up. He opened his door without hesitation. He’s been kind, patient, and steady.
And now my daughter is snuggled against him like she’s known this man her entire life.
About thirty minutes in, Nora’s eyes start to close. I stroke a hand down her back. “Okay, baby. Time for bed.”
She lifts her sleepy gaze to mine before shifting her attention to River and reaching for him with her arms stretched wide. “Rivvy.”
The softness and trust threaded through her words slice right through me.
River doesn’t even blink. He lifts her carefully into his arms and kisses the crown of her head. “You stay here,” he says to me. “I’ve got her.”
Then he disappears down the hallway with Nora. Her arms are looped tight around his neck like she was made to fit there.
I count to sixty.
Sixty full seconds before tiptoeing after them and pausing outside the doorway.
I peek around the corner and find them sitting in the armchair.
Nora is wrapped in a blanket and tucked into his lap.
River’s voice is low and soothing as he reads Goodnight Moon, turning each page with care.
Every so often, my daughter gazes up at him with eyes that are full of wonder, as if he’s her whole world.
And maybe he is.
It’s getting harder to keep telling myself he’s not.
I step back and swallow down the lump of emotion welling within me. My hand presses to the center of my chest, as if that’ll be enough to physically hold my unsettled feelings in place.
Unsure what to do with myself, I wander into River’s bedroom and pause just inside. My gaze drifts around the space, taking in the details, looking for clues as to who he really is.
I’m not sure if I know anymore.
He’s not the man I originally pegged him to be.
He’s deeper.
Gentler.
Kind in a way that feels effortless.
And when it comes to my daughter, he’s so patient and attentive, it brings tears to my eyes. If there’s a way past my defenses, it’s through her.
Whether he realizes it or not, every day he’s chipping away at the walls I’ve spent years building around myself. Not with big, dramatic gestures. But with quiet, consistent moments that sneak in when I’m not paying attention.
A silver-framed photo on the nightstand catches my eye, and I gravitate in that direction before picking it up and studying it.
River’s with a beautiful blonde, both mid-laugh with their arms looped around each other.
There’s no mistaking the resemblance. This must be his twin sister.
She’s a delicate, more feminine version of him, with the same strong features and warm blue eyes.
Does she know he invited a woman and her toddler to shack up in his home?
Would she judge me for not being able to keep a roof over my daughter’s head?
Or think I’m a clout-chasing gold digger looking for a meal ticket?
I cringe at the thought, and gently set the photo back in its place before backing cautiously away.
In all likelihood, I won’t be here long enough for it to matter.
Still, the thought remains as I move toward the bathroom and close the door behind me. My gaze lands on the massive soaking tub in front of the floor-to-ceiling window. I can’t remember the last time I took a real bath.
Who has time for that with a small child, a business, and a never-ending mountain of responsibilities waiting for them?
Not this girl.
I tilt my head and listen for signs of Nora’s distress. Anything that’ll tell me I’m needed. That he’s not as capable of handling her as he’d assumed. A handful of seconds slip by, and still, the penthouse remains silent.
Peaceful.
I chew my lower lip as a silent war rages inside my head.
Duty versus exhaustion.
Just fifteen minutes.
That’s all I’ll allow myself.
If River needs me, he’ll figure out where I am.
Decision made, I turn the tap and begin filling the tub.
The water steams as I strip off my clothes and slide into the heat, letting it cradle me.
Once I relax against the smooth curve of the porcelain, it doesn’t take long for my eyelids to flutter shut and the tension in my shoulders to melt away.
For the first time in forever, I exhale.
It should feel like a release.
Instead, it feels like a trap.
I know better than to believe this break from reality will last. It’s just an interlude. A moment of quiet before everything changes again.
A knock at the door is what pulls me from the tangle of my thoughts. I sit up slightly as the water sloshes against the rim of the tub. “Yeah?”
The door creaks open and River steps inside with a glass of wine in his hand.
“Nora’s asleep,” he says quietly. “She didn’t even make it to the second book.”
His eyes find mine and stay locked there. As tempting as it is to cross my arms over my breasts, I don’t. Instead, I hold his steady gaze, letting him see me.
When I don’t ask him to leave, he closes the distance between us before setting the glass on the edge of the tub. “I thought you could use this. Do you need anything else?”
“No,” I murmur. “I’m good.”
The air between us grows heavy with something I can’t quite name.
River lingers. “Should I leave?”
It’s a fair question.
The kind that demands honesty.
It’s almost a shock to realize I don’t want him to go.
I shake my head once.