Chapter Ten #2
“Oh. You’ve been bad?” the little girl asked, and Sloan thought the expression on her face showed she was trying to figure out what bad deed an adult could do to sit on Santa’s lap and ask for forgiveness to get a toy.
“No, I haven’t been bad,” Leslie said, and Sloan had to cough to smother a laugh.
The little girl was about to ask Leslie another question when the child’s mother gave Leslie an apologetic smile and shushed her daughter. “Kids still like you, I see,” Sloan whispered.
“And I still like them,” she said.
He didn’t say anything as he recalled the number of times he’d thought about them sharing those children. Had things worked out the way he’d wanted them to, the way he’d assumed they would, she would have been the mother of his babies by now.
He quickly pushed that thought from his mind. It was a dream that had been destroyed and would never be resurrected.
That night before going to bed, he called Leslie to tell her he had changed his mind about making a stop at his home in Fairbanks.
What he hadn’t told her was that while spending time with her today, he had experienced emotions he didn’t want to feel.
Emotions she seemed to elicit from him effortlessly.
The best thing to do was return Leslie to Wasilla. He needed to prepare mentally for their week together on Kodiak Island. Besides, there were a few behind-the-scenes things he needed to take care of regarding both her company and the Yuletide Toy Factory.
And there was Martin Longshire.
Already Sloan had gotten a call from Cole letting him know Longshire was digging into Sloan’s affairs.
Because he’d contacted Cole when he had, safeguards against tampering had been put in place.
However, Sloan intended to track every move Longshire made.
He would remain in Wasilla and work out of his hotel room instead of returning to Fairbanks.
It really didn’t make sense to go back and forth when he would need to return to Wasilla at the end of the week for Leslie.
He was determined not to have any contact whatsoever with Leslie this coming week.
Putting distance between them for a few days would definitely help him get his head together where she was concerned.
The strong attraction he’d felt toward her was something he could deal with as long as he kept things in perspective.
The one thing he refused to do was let Leslie Cassidy tangle with his mind ever again.
Leslie glanced over at Sloan when he parked the car at the airport.
Since leaving the hotel, he’d said very few words to her.
It was, she decided, a definite change compared to yesterday, when he’d been in a more talkative mood.
Actually, she had picked up on his change of moods yesterday evening when he’d brought her back to the hotel.
“Thanks,” she said after he opened the car door for her. Already he was moving away, toward the office where flight papers had to be filed.
Last night, he hadn’t invited her to join him for dinner, which was just as well.
She had ordered room service while watching a holiday movie on television.
Afterward, she had showered and gotten in bed.
That’s when Sloan had called to tell her he wouldn’t be stopping at his home in Fairbanks after all.
She hadn’t asked why he’d changed his mind, and he obviously hadn’t felt the need to tell her.
It didn’t take long for him to complete the necessary paperwork for them to take off. Unlike their earlier flight, when they’d engaged in a steady stream of conversation in the cockpit, the silence between them lasted through the entire flight.
More than once she found herself staring over at him while he maneuvered the plane through the less-than-friendly skies. It was snowing harder now than when they had arrived in North Pole, and she could tell Sloan’s concentration was on piloting the plane through the rough weather.
When the plane took an unexpected dip, she drew in a sharp breath. He obviously heard it, and that’s when he glanced over at her to ask, “You’re okay, Leslie?”
She nodded, trying not to remember that’s what he would ask her after they’d made love. It had always been important to him to know that the intensity of their lovemaking had been all right with her and that she had enjoyed it as much as he had. “Yes, Sloan, I’m okay.”
He resumed looking ahead, and she continued watching him, unable to look away. At that moment she felt a deep loss, a sense of extreme regret. It wasn’t the first time she’d felt this way since discovering the truth, but it was hitting her harder today than ever before.
Why? Could it be the time she’d spent with Sloan over the past several days had made her realize just what she’d lost?
Then there was the kiss they’d shared. She drew in a deep breath, definitely feeling the impact of knowing a man who’d once loved her as deeply as she’d loved him was lost to her forever.
Refusing to look over at him any longer, she thought about the plans for next week, when she would spend time with him at the cabin. Unlike the last time he’d asked her to spend a week with him, when she’d been all happy and excited about doing so, now she was dreading it.
Because he had invited her for one reason and one reason only: closure.
Sleeping with her, if that’s what happened, would be closure for him.
He had loved her once. She knew Sloan. He had gotten over her like he’d said he had, but they needed a final chapter.
There would not be a happy ending, just an ending.
Sloan had shared with her that closure was how he had dealt with his mother, too, after he’d discovered how much of a gold-digger Barbie was.
Bart hadn’t had to take Barbie to court for custody of Sloan.
Instead, he’d given her enough money up front to keep her living in style for the rest of her life.
Unfortunately, she hadn’t known how to manage her finances.
Sloan had heard from her a number of times over the years.
Somehow, she had managed to reach out to him without Bart knowing about it.
But she hadn’t called because she was interested in Sloan’s well-being.
The only time she’d call was when she wanted him to hit Bart up for more money.
When Sloan had refused, she cursed him out and told him she was glad he wasn’t a part of her life.
Sloan had told Leslie how he had gone to see Barbie during his first year of college, after finding out where she was living.
He had given her a check that had represented every last cent he’d had in his savings account—which had been close to fifty thousand dollars—and had told her he didn’t want to see her ever again.
Seeing his mother that day had been about closure.
Now Leslie figured she was just another closure he had to deal with. However, little did he know, but she needed closure as well. It was only when she got it that she could move on with her life.