Chapter 38
THIRTY-EIGHT
I pull my hoodie over my head as I jog down the stairs, hearing my parents in the kitchen and Winston’s happy taps on the floor. The telltale sign he’s getting treats.
“Good boy!” Mom coos as I enter the kitchen and see Winston sitting with his front paws in the air as Mom feeds him a treat.
“What are you doing to my dog?” I ask, taking in the scene before me.
“Winston is learning how to sit pretty. Aren’t you, buddy?” Mom says, giving him another treat for doing absolutely nothing, with all four paws on the ground.
I sigh and glance at Dad, who just chuckles, turning back to the dishwasher to load the rest of the dishes from supper.
“Where are you going?” Mom asks, her eyes flicking to my hoodie.
“Over to Silas’s,” I say.
Winston immediately jumps up, looking at me with an excited whine, telling me he’s more than ready to go, too.
“Oh?” Dad asks, glancing over his shoulder at me, and Mom perks up.
“Yeah,” I say, glancing between them. “We… figured everything out.”
Mom smiles warmly, and Dad turns to face me with a nod and a smile of his own.
“Glad to hear it,” Dad says. “You guys were more than just friends. I knew you’d find your way back eventually.”
I give him an awkward, tight-lipped smile, trying to keep the flush out of my cheeks.
More than just friends. If only they knew what that actually means now.
“Agreed,” I say with a nod, then quickly turn to head for the front door. “See you later.”
“Bye, honey,” Mom calls after me as I quickly duck outside with Winston on my heels.
I need to find some fucking chill.
The sky is full of rain clouds this evening, and I glance up at them, hoping they’ll hold off a little bit longer. They moved in this afternoon as nothing more than a threat, but now they’re looking like they’re going to make good on that promise.
I pick up my pace as I head up the dirt road towards the farm, glancing back at the house before I turn up the driveway leading to Silas’s cabin.
I told myself I was going to look for a place to live this week, but… being this close has its perks.
What’s a few more weeks of living with my parents?
Light raindrops start to fall just as we start up the driveway, and I glance up at the stormy sky. But then it immediately starts pouring.
“Argh!” I pull my hood up and break into a run.
Winston lets out an excited yip as he runs along beside me for a few steps, then takes off ahead of me and disappears around the bend to the cabin before I even pass Silas’s grandparents’ house.
I keep my head down as I run up the driveway and up the cabin steps, nearly running right into Silas on the covered porch.
“Oh.” I come to an abrupt stop and pull my now-soaked hood down to look at Silas standing in the middle of the porch. “Hey.”
But his attention isn’t on me at all, as he stares out at the trees. I follow his line of sight to the small break in the woods that opens towards the hollow heart field.
“It wasn’t supposed to rain this much,” he says, and I feel the tension rolling off him.
I nod, bringing my attention back to him. But he continues staring at the opening to the field, biting his lip and picking at his thumb.
“Hey,” I say, nudging him so he looks at me.
His eyes are full of worry, and I give him a soft smile to try to take some of it away. “It’s alright. We have a plan,” I say.
“But the stress zone holds onto water after heavy rain,” he says as his eyes slide past me again. “This can fuck everything up. This can—”
“Si,” I say, stepping forward and lifting my hand to the side of his face, turning him to face me. “This is exactly why we mapped it out the way we did. We planted with these stressors in mind. Rain doesn’t erase all of that.”
His jaw shifts as he bites the inside of his cheek, and my gaze drops to take in the movement before meeting his eyes again.
“Do you trust me?” I ask.
His chest rises and falls, and I feel some of the tension release with his breath as he nods.
I smile. “Good. Now let’s go inside. I’m fucking soaked.”
Silas drops his eyes to my wet hoodie like it’s personally offended him, then turns and pushes the cabin door open.
I chuckle as I step in after him, and Winston slips in before me.
I pull my hoodie off and hang it on the hook by the door as I look around, and a warm feeling settles in my chest.
This place is pure Silas.
Simple, rustic, minimal, and just how I remember it.
The exposed wooden beams and creaky floor are the same as they’ve always been, and it’s clear that he's fixed it up just enough to live in and be comfortable. The old wood stove still sits in the corner, and the walls are bare like they always have been. He has a couch and an armchair in the living room, which opens to the kitchen, where there’s a small table with two chairs.
His drawing supplies are scattered over the top of the table, and it’s the only real sign that this place is his.
Winston’s fluffy tail disappears down the short hallway as he sniffs around, and I see his bed and a side table in the bedroom.
“Could use some art on the walls,” I say with a chuckle, doing another sweep of the place before I turn to Silas again.
He stands near the front window in the living room, still picking at his thumb as he looks out at the rain. “Hm,” he hums as he turns to face me, and I’m not sure he even heard me.
I step towards him, sliding my hands onto his hips and looking into his eyes.
“I promise it will be ok,” I say.
And I fully believe that. In every way.
Silas holds my gaze for a moment before he nods, and I lean in until my lips find his. His arms lift to wrap around me, and I step in closer, pressing my body to his as I pull him into me.
The rain on the roof offers a soothing backdrop, despite the stress it’s bringing Silas, and our kiss deepens as I feel his mind slip further away from the rain and closer to me. I give him everything I have as an urge rises to make him feel comfortable, at ease, and… good.
My hands slide down to his lower back, and I pull his hips into mine, the contact sending a surge of heat through me.
My heart thumps as I kiss him harder, feeling his tongue against mine and my hardening cock pressed to his.
And as my hands slip under the hem of his T-shirt and run along the waistband of his jeans, his breath hitches.
I want to do this more than anything right now. But… I have no idea what I’m doing. Or how to actually do this.
Our lips part as my fingers brush over his belt, and I pull back enough to look into his eyes. His breaths are heavy as his eyes flick between mine, and I gently run my fingers over his belt again.
“Do you want this?” I ask.
Silas releases a slow breath, and my entire body feels like it’s a fucking live wire waiting to ignite.
Then he nods.
Oh my god.
Ok. Ok, I need to find that fucking chill I’ve been looking for, stat.
But it’s nowhere to be found as I pull him to the couch to sit next to me, and I crash my lips to his in a desperate kiss as my body seems to take over and scream finally.
We fall into a heated, messy kiss as I let my hand drift down to his belt again and undo it with less than graceful movements as my hand trembles with both nerves and excitement.
Once it’s undone, I slip my hand under his T-shirt to run up his stomach, and fuck. He’s all hard muscle and defined abs, and now I am fully hard and fucking aching.
“Take this off,” I mutter against his lips, tugging at the hem of his shirt.
I sit back to let him pull his T-shirt over his head, and Jesus fucking Christ…
All I can do is stare at him, letting my eyes roam over his defined muscles and strong, lean build, then up to his face, now framed by his messy dark blond hair hanging loose around his face with his hat off.
“Fuck,” I breathe out.
His gaze falls to my T-shirt as well, then lifts to meet my eyes again with one brow raised.
With a huff, I grab the hem and lift it over my head, tossing it aside with his.
I watch him as his gaze slowly roams over my bare chest, like he’s cataloguing every part of me, and committing every muscle to memory. When our eyes meet again, he pulls in a breath.
“Fuck,” he says quietly.
My lips are on his before I can even form another thought. I let my hands roam over him until my fingers reach his pants again, and I just fucking go for it.
I slide his zipper down, and when my fingers brush over his hard cock in his boxers, my heart damn near skips a beat. And the small groan that escapes him only urges me on, giving me the courage to slip my hand into his boxers, and wrap my fingers around him.
Holy shit. I can’t believe I’m fucking doing this.
His hand lifts to the back of my head as I stroke him, his fingers twisting in my hair as a heavy breath escapes him.
The sensations of Silas fucking Gallant surround me, pulling me under and holding me as a more-than-willing hostage while my tongue moves against his and I stroke him again and again.
I let myself get lost in him as his breathing quickens and his grip on my hair tightens, and I kiss him even harder. I can’t fucking get enough.
I want more. I need more of him.
I pull my hand out of his pants and grab the waistband, pushing it down. He releases me as his hands drop, and he lifts his hips to push his pants and boxers down, and I break our kiss to look.
Oh my god.
Oh my fucking god.
I don’t think I’ve ever been this turned on, and I’m staring at a hard dick.
My best friend’s hard dick.
A groan escapes me as my hand moves to my own dick, and I squeeze it through my jeans to release some of the pressure that’s quickly building. Then I immediately undo my buckle and zipper and push my pants and boxers off.
Silas’s eyes widen as they fall down my body and he pulls a deep breath in before he meets my gaze again.
I take a moment to look into his eyes, searching for any sign that he doesn’t want to do this. But it’s not there. All I see is hunger and heat.