Chapter 23
CHAPTER 23
Felix
We need to talk.
I stare at the text, chewing my thumbnail. I know I should ignore it, but when Sully mentions “the cat”, I know I can’t really ignore it.
And to add extra fuckery to an already souring morning, Samson meows like a damsel in distress.
Please, dad, don’t let the big bad asshole take me away! He’ll never feed me on time!
I look at Samson with pleading eyes.
“You are so high maintenance, you know that?” I say as I text Sully back with an okay.
Bel Air’s in an hour work for you?
Of course, he would pick the Bel Air’s cafe. He always raved about the place, but I never found their food or their drinks particularly above average.
Fine , I text back.
Truth be told, I don’t have much to do, other than pack for the trip. With the concert only four days away, rehearsals are lessening. Once we hit sound check, we should be fine.
And the last couple rehearsals have been damn near flawless.
Duncan’s adapted to the material wonderfully, and even Eddie seems to have simmered down a bit. Corpse, too. His playing has always been good, but even I have noticed he’s a lot more focused lately.
I have no worries at all about this show.
We’re going to fucking kill it!
Though, a part of me is annoyed that Sully assumed I’d be sitting around my house doing nothing, loafing.
It doesn’t matter that he was right, but it pisses me off that he can play off our familiarity, our history together, and irritate the fuck out of me, even when he sounds like he’s trying to wave a damn white flag.
Samson meows, a warning.
“I promise,” I reassure him, though I’m not sure if he understands me. He is a cat, after all.
When I finally make it to Bel Air’s, Sully is sitting outside on the terrace, scrolling his phone.
I notice him slouching, his legs crossed, and he looks disinterested in the world.
He looks up to see me, a wide grin spreading across his face, like he didn’t just punch me in my damn face a couple days ago.
He was probably high and doesn’t remember, Felix.
“Lixy, so nice of you to come.”
“Don’t call me that,” I bite as I round the table, sliding into a seat across from him.
Sullivan smugly grins. “What the matter, baby? Didn’t get your daily dose of dick yet?” he taunts me.
His words are like slime, dripping down a steel wall.
Fucking disgusting.
I cross my legs as a waitress sets down a glass of water in front of me, and a glass of cranberry juice, garnished with lime. I glance at it as she hands Sully a beer.
“What’s this?” I ask, even though I know without tasting it, it’s a vodka cranberry.
“I thought maybe this meeting would go better if we both took the edge off of things. You’re a lot easier to talk to when you don’t want to kill me.”
I push the drink aside, instead grabbing the water.
“I’m good, thanks.”
Sully raises an eyebrow.
“Look at you being all noble and shit. I have to say, it is endearing. Cute almost.”
“Cut the shit, Sully. I’ll save you some time. I’m keeping the cat.”
Sully rolls his eyes.
“Lixy, baby, this isn’t about the cat. I just said that so I could get you alone. Surely, you know that. Or has all the alcohol and drugs rotted your brain already?”
I cross my arms, biting my tongue.
I knew this was a bad idea. I knew I shouldn’t have come here.
I move to leave. “Well, if that’s the case, then my work is done here. There’s nothing else to talk about.” I get up, making a move for the door.
Sully grabs my wrist, pulling me back.
He presses his thumb into my vein, making me freeze.
“Felix...” his voice is smooth, like whiskey over dry ice.
It makes me forget how to breathe.
Once upon a time, I would have done anything for that voice.
That smooth, silky tone that covered me in lies.
I pull my wrist back, glaring at him.
“Don’t make me beg,” he says darkly and his gaze implores me. “I don’t want to fight anymore, baby. I want things to go back to the way they were.”
I step back, blinking furiously. I can’t have heard him correctly.
He wants me back?
“I want back in the band. In the family,” he says. “You know, we both have a tendency to get a little...” He runs his finger down my forearm and I shudder. “Hot headed sometimes. Say shit we don’t mean.”
“I meant everything I said,” I remind him. “Drunk or sober.”
Sully smugly chortles as he shrugs. “These last couple days, this last week... fuck I’ve missed you, Felix. I’ve missed your foul little mouth, your fight.” He takes a step closer to me, and I am acutely aware of his proximity.
“I don’t miss you. In fact, I’ve been fucking sky high without you to drag me down.”
“I don’t believe you,” he replies.
I am just about to give him the finger when his hand grabs my throat, holding me still and kisses me.
The unmistakable snapping of a shutter echoes around us, and I push him away. So hard I almost knock the table over.
“No,” I say, loud enough everyone in a five-mile radius can hear. “You are a poison, Sully. And I’m done with your toxic fucking bullshit. You’re too late.”
“Lixy, baby!” he calls angrily. “Whoever he is, he isn’t me!”
I turn around, glaring at him. “You’re right, he isn’t. He’s a fucking man and he’s more than you’ll ever be.”
I hiss as I jump on my bike, speeding past the darkness and into the light once more.
When I pull up to Duncan’s driveway, my phone rings. It’s been ringing nonstop for twenty minutes. I pull it from my pocket and glance at the screen to see it’s Lou.
No doubt he’s already dealing with the onslaught of damage control and wants to probably rip me a new asshole, but right now, I don’t need Lou freaking out on me.
Because there’s only one person who I need to hear from right now.
I knock on the door, and Duncan opens it almost immediately.
“Felix... I just got off the phone with Lou.”
“Oh,” I say, feeling speechless.
In my head I’d gone over this exact moment on the way here, but now that it is here...
One. Two. Three.
“Can I... come in?” I ask, feeling on the edge of the precipice.
“Of course.” Duncan opens the door wider for me to step in.
“What did Lou say?” I ask hesitantly.
Duncan hands me his phone, and I see the text.
Felix fucked up. Again.
This time I won’t be able to clean it up.
I look up at Duncan as the truth is revealed.
I scroll to see the TikToks and Reels, the posts he sent Duncan.
Of Sully grabbing me, kissing me.
Of me yelling about my man who is more than he will ever be.
My eyes glass over, and tears beg to fall.
“I’m so sorry,” I say as Duncan pulls me close, holding me against his chest.
His scent encapsulates me and I let go.
I wrap my arms around him, holding on for dear life.
“Did you mean what you said?” he asks.
I bury my tears in his shirt, breathing him in like oxygen as I nod furiously.
“Every fucking word,” I say as I sniffle.
He lets go of me, heading down the hall.
“You’re not mad at me, are you? For what happened?” I ask, following him.
He heads into the workshop, toward a bench where he’s got a guitar that is broken up into parts. It’s hot, with the fan circulating air, but it smells highly of varnish and wood, and it’s comforting on so many levels.
Duncan shrugs. “No, Felix. I’m not mad. I’m just... keeping my hands busy,” he says nodding for me to join him. “Polish that for me, will you? It needs to be completely sanded off before I assemble it.”
I don’t argue with him as I do what he asks, my phone ringing off the hook.
“You should answer him, you know,” he suggests.
“I know,” I say, sanding off the chipped blue paint. “But I’m not ready to deal with the storm yet.” I glance up at him. “I think it was his plan all along. He couldn’t destroy me like he used to. So he tried to destroy the only thing left of me he could.”
“Yeah, and what’s that?” Duncan asks.
“My image,” I reply as I rhythmically sand off the chipped paint until there is nothing left but wood.
Until the last bits of what it was disintegrate, leaving forth a blank canvas.