Chapter 49 #2
“I can feel your anxiety,” Crew says. “What are you thinking about?”
I open my eyes and chew on my bottom lip for a moment. The reality of what I can live with will never get easier to discuss.
“I saw the Grim tonight when Locke was dying,” I say.
Crew’s face remains blank. “I know. I saw you go into that same trance as before.”
“He’s not my father, Crew,” I say. “He was, but not anymore. The Grim told me James didn’t exist, and I felt like I was reliving my dad’s death.”
He grabs my hand, offering what support he can in this moment as the tears well in my eyes.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Crew questions.
I sigh. “I always held on to the fact that maybe, somehow, I would see him again, but that’s gone.”
“I’m so sorry,” he says, squeezing my hand. “Your father loved you deeply, Mara. This was his destiny, and I don’t know how, but maybe one day you will find comfort in knowing what he is.”
“I don’t think I’ll ever come to terms with that, Crew.”
He kisses my forehead, and I turn, letting him have time under the water.
“That’s not all he said,” I continue.
Crew tilts his head back, exposing his strong neck, and groans. “I had a feeling.”
“He said they were beating us at the game. That we weren’t just dealing with Elders anymore.”
“Hmm,” he hums, clearly thinking.
“And he said they weren’t dealing with just hybrids anymore either.”
Crew’s gaze goes hard, and his eyes narrow. “What does that mean?”
“I don’t know,” I respond.
“I think that means you, Mara, you aren’t a normal hybrid.”
“But that doesn’t explain the former.”
He shakes his head. “No, it doesn’t.”
Silence surrounds us, and I find myself more lost in thought than trying to speak all this aloud.
The water cools, and we step out of the shower, quickly wrapping towels around ourselves.
I wipe the fog off the mirror and look at my reflection.
My face has changed over the past month.
It’s stronger and tougher, but for the first time, my blue eyes are clear, and I know what I want for my future.
And it has nothing to do with the Orders and everything to do with Crew.
“We should go talk to Theo,” Crew says. “Before tomorrow.”
“About mastering this bond,” I ask, my stomach sinking. “Or breaking it?”
“I never want to be away from you again, little angel,” he responds sharply. “There will be no breaking of any bond as far as I’m concerned.”
He walks behind me, trailing his rough fingers over the towel, and I shiver. He leans in, moving his lips down my neck and across my shoulders. I turn to face him, and he wraps his hands around my body, cupping my ass.
Crew leans forward, drinking me in, and the bond hums between us.
His mouth moves to mine, and I tip my head back, opening for him.
His tongue moves into my mouth, and I slide my hands around his neck, pulling him closer.
I trail my opposite hand down his chest, stopping just before the top of the folded towel around his hips.
“Keep going,” he rasps. “I’ll beg if you want.”
“Why would I stop?”
He cuts his eyes to the door where Locke rests in the other room.
“He is asleep,” I say.
Crew tightens his brow. “You know this?”
“Yes.”
He squeezes my ass. “I don’t like you feeling another man, Mara. It’s going to drive me insane.”
“Stop that.” I grab his jaw. “I don’t feel him like I do you. I told you, Bannermin. And if you say it again, I’m going to get pissed.”
His lips curl into a smile. “Are you going to hit me if I continue?”
“Possibly. Why, would you like that?”
Crew laughs. “I actually think I would.”
“Well, keep talking nonsense, and I’ll hit you straight in the fucking jaw.”
He lets out a laugh, and I can't help but smile as the deep tone echoes around the bathroom.
I rarely get to hear him laugh like this, and each time is a special treat.
His smile meets mine, and the silver in his eyes sparkles in the bathroom's lighting.
I jump up, wrapping my arms around his neck, and kiss him on the lips.
Crew pulls back and gazes into my eyes, tucking a stray lock of hair behind my ear. We linger in this moment together. No one else is around—just us—and I open the bond so he can feel the peace and love flowing through me.
His lips lock around mine, and I taste the familiar smoke and deadly nightshade that radiates from him. We blend perfectly, and he presses his hips against mine, a thrill moving through my core.
His lifeforce runs through me, and mine through him—my Crew.
And a thought slams into me.
“Crew,” I say, pulling back. “You are mortal.”
He blinks in shock. “Should I tattoo it on my forehead?”
“No, hush,” I command. “But we are sealed as one.”
“Yeah?”
“What if my immortal life bled into you?”
He reflects on the words. “I mean, I guess that could be possible. But that could also mean that my mortality bled into you.”
I shake my head. “I don’t think so. I would feel it, right?”
“I’m not sure.”
“What if we can reverse your mortality and you take more of my immortality?” I nearly jump. “We could change this.”
He steps back. “I don’t think we should get our hopes up, Mara. It could only lead to more hurt.”
I grab his hand, not letting him put any distance between us, “It’s worth trying.”
He wraps his hands around my neck, giving me one last kiss. “I'd try anything to have just one more second with you.”
I smile at him fondly. “Then we need to go talk to Theo. Now.”
He leans down, grabbing his clothes as I do the same. A feeling of hope moves between us, and I can’t shake the thought that this is it. This is what we’ve needed to realize. Together. We are sealed, and together we are more powerful than those around us.
I quickly pull my clothes back on and make my way to the door. I glance behind me, sensing an odd shift, and notice Crew standing still with a strange look twisting his face.
“Crew? What’s wrong?”
“I—” he tries to speak. “Don’t know.”
He doubles over and begins to pant, gulping for air. As I watch, the color drains from his face, and he clutches his chest. A deep, painful groan slips from his lips, and time seems to slow as his massive body falls to the floor.