Chapter 53
Carver notices the movement in Crew and motions for Sam to look.
“Ah,” Sam says, far too happily. “It seems like Mr. Bannermin may wake up to join the party.”
My eyes dart over to Damien and Bronwyn as they near the door that leads into the Order's main area.
I keep glancing over, trying to give them a sign to take off and escape, but they hesitate every time.
I desperately want them to leave, but I know they won't go without us coming with them, and it's a painful realization knowing that all five of us won’t have that option.
“We need Crew to wake up to know if the shift truly happened,” Carver says. “No one moves a muscle until that happens. Then we can have our fun.”
I let Locke help me up, and I rush back toward the couch, ignoring all the others around me, focusing only on Crew.
He is all that matters. With each passing second, I know our time is running out.
The short time we had together is fading, and the only regret I have in my life is not paying closer attention to the signs. And not loving him harder.
I open the channel between us as wide as I can and begin to beg.
“Crew,” I say in my mind. “If you can hear me, please give me a sign.”
I watch his body for any movements like before, but nothing comes. The silence screams in my mind, and a desperation causes my heart to thunder. A lump forms in my throat, and I feel like I can’t breathe.
“Please,” I slam my voice down the bond. “I need you to wake up. Give me anything.”
The others remain motionless, waiting for any sign of life. The room grows cold, and Sam moves closer to Carver, as if growing bored with the wait.
“This only took you half an hour, right?” Sam asks Carver.
He responds, “Yeah, but Crew is weak.”
I keep sending vibration after vibration through the bond, feeling myself grow tired from the power I’m using, but I don’t stop.
The pain intensifies in my chest from the shattering hopelessness I feel, and I grip his hand tighter, uncaring if I snap it in half.
His rough hands remain motionless in mine, and I gently rub my thumb across his perfect skin.
But still, nothing.
A loud sob escapes my lips, and I rest my head against the couch, letting the sorrow wash over me.
“I love you, Crew,” I weep. “I love you, and I’m sorry. I’m so sorry I’ve only ever caused you pain.”
A faint voice, like a breath of fresh air, reaches my soul, and I almost jump as it drifts into my mind.
“Mara.”
I jolt.
“…I’m awake.” Crew’s deep voice hums. “And I love you too. More than you know.”
I fight back the tears and maintain my composure, not wanting to alert the others. I keep my head low, and my eyes fly open, staring at the floor.
“Crew, please keep talking to me,” I beg, silently. “Are you alright?”
“Should I lie to myself or be honest with you?”
“Don’t give me that shit,” I hiss.
“I’m okay,” he responds.
“Liar.”
I swear I hear him chuckle. “Am not.”
“They say you are becoming an Elder?” I ask. “Have you shifted?”
Crew hesitates, but answers, “…Yes.”
“We need to get out of here, Crew.”
“You know that isn’t an option.”
“Why?” I nearly shout aloud.
“We won’t all make it, blood slinger. They will slaughter us.”
Another loud sob escapes my throat, but I keep my head pressed against the couch and tighten my hold against his hand.
“Mara,” he whispers. “You need to listen to me.”
I let out a hard exhale, not wanting to know what plan he has, as everything within me tells me I won’t like it.
“Okay. But please don’t move. They are watching.”
“I can hear them,” Crew’s voice slithers around me. “But… you know they are going to try to kill me.”
“I won’t let that happen.”
“We don’t have a choice anymore,” he insists.
“Yes, we fucking do.”
Crew pauses. “I’m going to ask something of you.”
“Crew, stop.”
“Listen to me, little angel.”
I sigh, “What?”
“Let them follow me.”
“Crew.”
“And if things don’t go well,” he says, “let them… kill me.”
I blink back tears. “You know I won’t do that.”
“They won’t stop until the debt is paid,” Crew continues. “The shift happened. I can feel the power as an Elder.”
“Then we will fight,” I say.
“They will kill us all if we choose that route,” he responds. “And I can’t be the reason you die. They will fucking slaughter us.”
A sob nearly leaves my quivering lips. “Then we will run.”
“If we run, they will chase us. Forever.”
“Then I will run forever, Crew. I will run forever with you. Until I can’t take another step.”
“Mara…” he whispers. “My angel.”
“I’m not joking.”
He huffs, “That isn’t a life I’d ever subject anyone to. Especially you.”
“I don’t give a fuck.”
“You can’t beat them as is, and I think you know that.”
I take a minute to respond, and he’s right. As High Elders, we can’t compete with them. Especially now that there are two. It’s an impossible fight we will all eventually lose, and what happens when that becomes a reality?
We all die. That’s what happens.
“Then what do I do?” I fumble my words. “Tell me.”
“I already told you, little angel.”
“You dying isn’t an option I’m willing to discuss with you,” I bite back.
“I’m going to wake up,” Crew says, and I feel the faintest squeeze on my hand. “And I’m going to run. Alone. To get them away from you.”
“No!” I slam my voice down the bond.
“You are going to stay back while they follow me. I will try to outrun them, and I will fight as hard as I can to get back to you.”
“Crew,” I hiss. “Stop. This.”
“And if it comes down to it, Mara, you will let them kill me to pay the debt.”
“I won’t.”
“You will.”
A tear rolls down my cheek as I turn my face away from their view. Locke notices my pain, and I sense a heavy sigh escape his lips. Through the bond, I swear I can feel Crew’s hand wrap around my neck, pulling me closer.
A sorrow I’ve never known slithers up my spine like the touch of death, and I speak again.
“I can’t let you do this.”
“You can, Mara. Don’t be scared. It was always my destiny to die, and I knew that long before you came. I just never wanted it to be this way.”
“Crew, please.”
He whispers, “I had so many plans for us.”
“Stop this shit!”
“Listen to me, my angel. I do not fear them or death,” he pauses. “My only fear has ever been leaving you too soon.”
“Well, I’m horrified,” I say. “I’m fucking terrified, Crew. This can’t be happening.”
“I’m going to be alright, and so will you.”
“How do you know?” I snap.
“Because I have you on my side, and you have someone on your side that they don’t.”
My father.
The Grim Reaper.
“Do not come after me, or they will kill you, too,” Crew whispers.
“Then I’ll let them kill me.”
“Mara, if you come after me, I will stop you myself. Please don’t make me do that.”
“Don’t do this to me, Crew. You are asking me to do the impossible.”
“We don’t have time,” his voice sounds in my mind. “Mara, I need you to be strong. You can handle this, blood slinger. You can handle anything.”
“I can’t.”
“You can.” Somehow, I feel him smiling, “You kicked my ass many times.”
“You said you wouldn’t leave me again.”
“Without your knowledge,” he says.
“Oh, fuck off,” I bite.
“Then bring me back. Bring me back to you.”
“No,” I sob. “Please…don’t do this.”
“What I feel for you, Mara, can’t be taken away by death. My soul is yours anyway. You are my angel, my grace, and my absolute everything.”
My lip quivers hearing his steady, confident words swirl in my mind like a calm breeze.
“I’ll wait all of eternity if I must until I can see your face again. I am not afraid any longer of my fate—only the time it will take for me to have you in my arms again.”
The tears that fall from my eyes cloud my vision, and my entire body trembles. A final whisper moves into my mind.
“This isn’t over, blood slinger. I’m far from done with you.”
A loud sob escapes my lips, causing Carver and Sam to glance my way momentarily, giving Crew a chance to act.
In an instant, Crew rises from the couch in a dark blast that sends shockwaves through the room, ripping our hands apart.
The others stagger back, and I quickly sit up to see Crew glance in my direction.
His silver eyes shine through the darkness, hesitating as he finds my gaze. We remain locked for a moment, letting the reality of everything sink in. He slightly dips his head.
“Don’t give me that look,” he whispers.
I weep and reach for him, grabbing nothing.
“Even death won’t keep me from you.”
Crew sends a wave of calmness through the bond, and I know for certain he has no hesitation about this.
A soft smile curls his lips, and for a moment, I feel like I’m staring at the same cocky man that I met years ago, and I can’t help but smile through the tears and soul-shattering pain threatening to pull me under.
The bond hums one last time—like a star on the brink of exploding—and he peels his gaze away from me.
“I truly lived once I met you. And one day I will live again… because of you.”
Something more powerful than I’ve ever felt from him radiates from his palms as he aims it directly at Sam and Carver.
His gaze shifts toward the night sky, setting his plan in motion, as his massive black wings burst forth from his back like an explosion.
Damien, Locke, and Bronwyn look on in disbelief, and a tremor from the power nearly sends us tumbling to the ground again.
Crew looks at his friends, and I see a tear slide down his cheek as he dips his head with a soft smile on his face.
“Tell them how much I love them.”
With a burst of speed, he leaps through the open window into the night, a dark figure silhouetted against the stars.
A loud scream escapes the High Elders’ lips as their massive, golden wings unfold and they dive after him into the darkness.
“Fuck,” Damien screams.
“He’s alive.” Locke stumbles toward the window. “What is he doing?”
Tears fall like rain down my cheeks, and I watch as they disappear into the night sky back toward the golden fields.
“For now,” I sob. “He’s protecting us. He is going to let them kill him.”
“Why the fuck would he do that?” Locke snaps.
I gaze at them through the tears that haze my eyes. “Because he wants me to bring him back.”
“Oh my… god,” Locke says. “As a High Elder.”
I unfold my wings, letting the white feathers block out the darkness surrounding the room and my heart, then race toward the window.
I throw my body through the opening, free-falling for a moment before pushing myself upward into the night.
I glance down and see the angels in the garden, dead, and my stomach twists.
I look behind me to see the others following without hesitation, and I flap my wings harder than ever before.
If Crew wants to stop me, then I’ll let him—we will go down together.