Chapter Three #3
I shook my head. That was years in the future, and my father could be capricious.
He had another sixty or seventy years of life left.
He might choose another heir in that time.
I wouldn’t worry about that. The Zulenii prince was of more immediate concern.
But there I had no great fear. “He won’t choose me anyway,” I told my mother.
“If he’s a typical man, he’ll choose Finnrey.
She’s the prettiest. If he wants to follow protocol, he’ll choose Cameed since she’s the eldest. If he wants to feel important and smart, he’ll choose Riah.
Everyone feels clever after talking to her for a few minutes.
I’m just the daughter of a third wife. There’s nothing particularly remarkable about me. ”
My mother gave me one of her long looks that usually indicated I was being a dusthead.
“What?”
“Are you my daughter?”
“Yes.”
“Do you not look like me?”
“I suppose?”
“Was I not chosen by a king?” Here was her vanity, rearing its head again.
“What’s your point?”
“You are beautiful—far more beautiful than Finnrey. Your eyes alone are captivating. I have the same eyes, and many men have told me I’m irresistible, including your father.”
“You are my mother. Of course, you think I’m beautiful,” I protested. “You forget I tower over most men.”
“If what your father says is correct—and he is always correct—you won’t be taller than these Zulenii. When the foreign prince sees you, he will be smitten.”
“Then I’ll slouch, wear my ugliest clothing, and rub compost all over so I stink.”
My mother almost tripped on her skirts, which was not like her. She was graceful to a fault. “You will not. My daughter must be the most beautiful, most sought-after—”
“Mama, before you wanted to hide me. Now you want me to be carried away to another kingdom?”
“Of course not! But if you can’t be hidden then it would be an honor for you to be chosen by him.”
I blew out a breath. I loved my mother, but sometimes her need for validation frustrated me. That desire to feel chosen—to have me, her daughter chosen—could blind her and make her behave illogically.
“I remember my grandmother telling me stories of royal weddings,” she said, sounding wistful.
“The princesses were bedecked in gossamer gowns of the finest material and ornaments of gleaming tertanium. Of course, this was in the time when divorce was outlawed, and even women who lived in the castle walls were encouraged to have as many children as possible. They weren’t all crammed together like cattle.
” She sniffed. “Back then they had cattle.”
I wasn’t so sure this past sounded as shiny as she made it out to be. “But back then women’s only role was to care for children. We couldn’t fight, couldn’t defend the kingdom.”
“Why would we want to? Only the need for so many men at the Barrier require women to fight now. Before, women learned defensive skills only to keep fit.” She waved a hand.
“I suppose we should be thankful for your training with this Claiming Rite looming over us. Mara, if the Zulenii chooses you, you must not allow him to win. This is why you must go to the training fields. You need to be ready to defeat and kill him.”
We were at the door to our house now, and I stopped and put my hands on my hips. “I’m ready to fight him now. I can defeat some...artist from Zulen.”
“Lower your voice. Theud is still sleeping.”
Theud was my mother’s third partner, and he absolutely worshipped the ground she walked on, which was why he had lasted so long.
He owned a pub and rarely rose before noon as he worked until after midnight.
Unlike my mother’s second partner, who behaved as though he was my father and tried to tell me what to do, Theud and I had an understanding.
We stayed out of each other’s way. I didn’t think of him as a father, and he didn’t try to tell me what to do.
He only cared about my mother anyway, which suited both her and me.
“I am pleased you have confidence in your abilities, but I’d rather not leave everything to chance.”
“What does that mean?”
“That’s not your concern.”
Apparently, even though I was the heir-apparent, that new status didn’t entitle me to share in her confidences. She reached for the door to the house. “Now go inside. Eat, bathe, and sleep for a few hours. You can go to the training field this afternoon.”
“Where are you going?” I asked.
“To speak to all of my favorite wolf pups,” she said and walked away.
I rolled my eyes at her cryptic comment.
My mother had a definite flair for the dramatic.
I did take her advice, though. I drew a bath, ate soup and bread I found in the kitchen, and then fell into bed, not even caring that my wet hair made my pillow damp and uncomfortable.
I didn’t think I’d be able to sleep. As soon as I closed my eyes, my father’s words came back to me: I have declared you my heir.
To succeed my father on the throne had never been a dream of mine.
Unlike my half-brothers and sisters, who played at being king or queen when we’d been children, I never pretended I would sit on the throne.
The idea was too farfetched. I knew my father favored me more than some of his other children but making a princess who had almost a dozen older siblings, and a handful of younger as well, the heir to the throne was unheard of.
The custom, if not the law, was that the line of succession almost always passed to the first or second-born male child.
My father himself had been the first-born of my grandfather.
My mother had played a part in this decision, no doubt.
I supposed she would expect me to be grateful, but right now I felt frightened.
I didn’t know how to rule a kingdom. How would I gain the people’s loyalty and love when most of the people in Earsleh barely knew who I was or referred to me as the tall one?
At some point exhaustion must have taken over because I finally slept and dreamed of Hollows chasing me.
I woke briefly, shaking the nightmare away, and thought I heard my mother speaking to Theud.
My eyes were heavy, and I fell back asleep until a prickling awareness caused me to snap awake.
I jumped at the sight of Theud, standing at the side of my bed, looking down at me.
He was a tall man, as tall as me, and brawny.
He had arms the size of tree limbs and shoulders as wide as the doorway.
My mother had once said she liked a man who could toss her over his shoulder, and I had no doubt Theud could oblige.
He was not a dim man, either. His pub did well, even if the ale was weak and the stew watery.
As far as I could tell, my mother loved Theud because he fed her vanity.
Anyone who saw the two of them together would realize within moments that Theud adored my mother and treated her like the queen she still believed herself to be.
He did not involve himself in politics, but if forced to choose a side, he always chose my mother’s.
“Your mother said to wake you now,” Theud said, his deep voice more like a rumble.
“And where is she?”
He shrugged. “She said to wake you. You’re awake.” He lumbered back out of my room.
I lay in bed for a long moment, enjoying the feel of a mattress beneath my back.
Sleeping on the ground under the stars was enjoyable for the first few nights, but I was happy to be back in my bed.
It was just big enough to fit me. In fact, my feet touched the carved wooden footboard when I stretched out.
I had a woven rug on the floor beside the bed so my feet would not freeze on the stone floors when I rose in the morning.
On the far side of the chamber was a screen hiding a basin and ewer for washing and a seat with a bowl for bodily functions.
Nearer the bed was a wardrobe with my clothing.
My mother always bought flowing dresses and skirts for me, but I preferred to wear a simple tunic with a belt and tight leggings.
I recalled my father’s declaration about my future almost immediately and had to swallow to push the nausea down.
Some queen I would be if my stomach rebelled whenever I was anxious.
I had faced death in the form of Hollows many times.
Sitting on a throne should not frighten me.
Trying to ignore my lingering unease, I rose, tied my hair up, then chose dark-colored clothing.
The training fields could be dusty this time of year, and there was no point staining my brighter-colored clothing.
When I emerged from my chamber, neither Theud nor my mother were home.
I did spot a plate with rice and beans. I ate about half of it then set out for the training fields, which were outside the castle walls near the seashore.
I hadn’t even crossed half of the courtyard before I realized news of the Zulenii’s arrival and the Claiming Rite had spread.
People I barely knew spotted me, stopped all conversation, and watched me walk past as though I was on my way to the gallows.
I tried waving to a few of them, but everyone looked so somber and terrified that I gave it up.
I understood their fear. Like me, most of the people of Earsleh had never seen a foreigner and thought the other kingdoms decimated.
Overnight, our ideas about the world had changed.
At the gates to the courtyard, the guard swung it open and said, “We were wondering when you would pass through.”
“Why?”
“All of your sisters have already made their way to the fields,” he said.
I wasn’t surprised that Cameed, Riah, or Morga were training early, but Finnrey and Broga had been on patrol and without sleep like me. They too must be eager to prepare to fight the Zulenii prince.