Chapter 5
FIVE
Michelle
I was hiding in my room again.
Definitely not hiding from the fact that I'd spent the morning alone with Ro, let him catch me on a hiking trail, and almost, almost, let him kiss me.
"Get it together," I muttered, staring at my screen without actually reading anything.
The problem was, I could still feel his hands on my waist. Still smell spruce and woodsmoke mixing with the pine-scented air. Still hear his voice saying "You're worth waiting for" like it was a fact, not a hope.
I'd been falling for you before I ever met you.
How was I supposed to maintain professional boundaries when he said things like that?
My phone buzzed. A text from Sasha.
Sasha: How's the pack situation? Have you stopped panicking yet?
Michelle: Define panicking.
Sasha: Michelle.
Michelle: I went location scouting with Ro this morning. It was professional. Mostly professional. There was an incident with ice and catching and almost-kissing but we maintained boundaries.
Sasha: ALMOST KISSING???
Michelle: But we didn't. Boundaries maintained. Very professional.
Sasha: You're an idiot. You know that, right?
Michelle: I'm being cautious.
Sasha: You're being scared. There's a difference. How's Lucas?
Michelle: Fine. We baked cookies yesterday. He named my plant George. It's ridiculous.
Sasha: It's adorable.
Michelle: It's ridiculous.
Sasha: You're smiling while typing that, aren't you?
I was. Damn it.
Michelle: I have to go. Work to do.
Sasha: Sure. "Work." Not hiding from your feelings.
Michelle: I can do both.
I set down my phone and tried to refocus on the spreadsheet, but my brain wouldn't cooperate. Instead, it kept replaying this morning.
The way Ro had looked at me in the early morning kitchen, like I was beautiful even with messy hair and no makeup and my guard completely down.
The way he'd listened when I talked about my fears, not dismissing them but acknowledging them.
The way he'd shared about his grandmother, an omega who'd balanced pack and personal identity, who'd chosen her art sometimes and been loved anyway.
The way he'd caught me on that trail and held me for just a moment too long, and I'd let him.
I was in so much trouble.
A knock on my door made me jump.
"Michelle?" Maya's voice. "Mom says to tell you that Bill and Lucas are about to start the gingerbread stream. She thinks you should 'supervise.'" I could hear the air quotes in her voice.
"I'm working."
"You're hiding."
"I'm working AND hiding. Multitasking."
Maya opened the door without permission, sixteen-year-old privilege, and leaned against the doorframe with a knowing smirk. "You like them."
"I'm their manager."
"You like-like them. All three of them." She grinned. "It's very obvious. Lucas looks at you like you're made of sunshine. Ro spent all morning filming you instead of the town. And Dex keeps positioning himself between you and any perceived threat, which right now is Josh's enthusiasm."
"That's just—they're just—" I gave up. "Maya, I don't know what I'm doing."
Her expression softened. "Then stop trying to know. Just feel."
"Feelings are messy."
"Feelings are human." She sat on the edge of my bed. "Michelle, I've watched you work yourself into exhaustion for years. I've seen you choose your business over everything else. Vacations. Holidays. Relationships. Even sleep. And you've been successful, yeah. But have you been happy?"
The question hit harder than it should have.
"I've been... satisfied. Accomplished."
"That's not the same as happy."
"It's enough."
"Is it though?" Maya looked at me with eyes too wise for sixteen.
"Because from where I'm sitting, the happiest I've seen you in years is right now.
Even though you're terrified. Even though it's complicated.
You're smiling more. You're stress-baking instead of stress-working. You're letting people in."
"I'm a mess."
"You're human. Finally." She stood. "Come downstairs. Lucas is about to teach Josh how to stream gingerbread content, and it's either going to be adorable or a disaster. Either way, you should be there."
"Why?"
"Because that's what pack does. They show up."
She left before I could argue, and I sat there processing.
She was right. I had been choosing work over everything else for years. Building walls, maintaining distance, proving I didn't need anyone.
And I'd been so lonely. A fact that had been brought into sharp focus when I watched Callie find her pack.
But these past few days, chaotic and terrifying and complicated as they had been, I'd felt more alive than I had in years.
Maybe that meant something.
I closed my laptop, took a deep breath, and headed downstairs where I found that the kitchen had been transformed into a streaming set.
Ro had set up two cameras, one for wide shots, one for close-ups, with softbox lighting that made everything look warm and inviting. Dex was managing the tech setup, running cables with military precision. Lucas stood at the counter with Bill, both wearing aprons, surrounded by baking supplies.
And Josh was bouncing with barely contained excitement, asking a million questions about stream setup and chat moderation and content strategy.
"Michelle!" Lucas's face lit up when he saw me, and my stupid heart did a flip. "Perfect timing. We're about to go live. Bill's teaching me the family gingerbread recipe."
"Mom's recipe," I corrected, moving into the kitchen. "She's very protective of it."
"Which is why we're honoring it on stream," Bill said, grinning. "Your mom's already texted me three times reminding me to mention her by name."
"That sounds like Janet," Dex observed from his position by the laptop.
The casual way he said my mother's name, like they were already family, made something in my chest warm.
"Do you need me for anything?" I asked, trying to sound professional. "I can monitor chat, or—"
"You could be on camera," Lucas suggested, his tone carefully casual. "If you want. No pressure. But viewers might enjoy seeing the family element."
"Lucas," I said warningly.
"I know, I know. Professional boundaries. But think about it, you're already in some of the footage from the other day. The gingerbread baking. Chat loved it. They're asking about you."
"They're asking about 'the mysterious woman,'" I corrected.
"Same thing."
"It's very much not the same thing."
Ro, adjusting a camera angle, said quietly, "He's not wrong about the viewer engagement though. The clips with you have significantly higher retention rates."
"You're analyzing my appearance on stream?"
"I'm analyzing everything. It's literally my job." But he was smiling slightly. "For what it's worth, you're a natural on camera. You just don't know it yet."
I wanted to argue, but Josh cut in, "Can we please start? I want to see how the stream setup works!"
Lucas laughed. "Okay, okay. Everyone ready?"
"Wait," I said. "I should—I need to—"
"You need to sit at the dining table and pretend to work while actually watching," Maya supplied, appearing with my laptop. "We all know that's what you're going to do anyway."
She wasn't wrong.
I settled at the dining room table, close enough to monitor but not in frame, and opened my laptop to actual work. Lucas's content calendar needed finalization, and I had emails to send about the New Year's stream sponsorship.
Professional. Manageable. Safe.
"Going live in three... two... one..." Dex counted down, and Lucas's entire demeanor shifted into his streaming persona.
"Hey, Cozy Crew!" His voice was warm and welcoming, that signature sunshine energy that had made him successful.
"Welcome to a very special holiday stream.
I'm here in beautiful Cedar Falls, Oregon, and I've got a treat for you today, my amazing manager's stepdad, Bill, is teaching me his wife's famous gingerbread recipe. "
The chat feed on my screen exploded with comments.
CozyFan22: CEDAR FALLS?? Are you on location??
HolidayVibes: WAIT is that the mystery woman's hometown??
StreamSniper: FAMILY RECIPE CONTENT OMG
LukesOmega: this is so wholesome I'm crying
Bill was a natural on camera, telling stories about how he'd learned the recipe from Janet, about family holiday traditions, about the importance of good gingerbread. Lucas asked questions, engaged genuinely, and the whole thing had this warm, cozy energy that was exactly his brand.
I tried to focus on my work. Really tried.
But I kept glancing up at the stream, watching Lucas in his element. He was so good at this, making people feel welcome, creating comfort, building community. No wonder he had a hundred thousand followers. I didn’t want to admit how long I’d been one of them either.
"Now, the secret to Janet's gingerbread," Bill was saying, "is the molasses to ginger ratio. You want that perfect balance of sweet and spice."
CozyFan22: taking notes furiously
HolidayVibes: BILL IS EVERYONE'S DAD NOW
LukesOmega: wait who's Janet? mystery woman's mom??
I smiled despite myself. The viewers were already treating my family like they were part of the community.
"Michelle!" Josh's voice made me look up. "Can you get the cookie cutters from the top shelf? Lucas needs them."
"I'm working—"
"It'll take two seconds," Lucas added, and there was something hopeful in his expression that made it impossible to refuse.
I stood, very aware of the cameras as I moved into the kitchen space. Ro adjusted the angle slightly, keeping me mostly out of frame, but I knew viewers would catch glimpses.
I reached for the top shelf where Mom kept the vintage cookie cutters, stretching up on my toes.
"Let me help," Lucas said, suddenly right behind me.
He was tall enough to easily reach the shelf, but instead of just grabbing the cutters, he put one hand on my waist to steady me, reaching past with the other.
We were close. Very close. His cedar-vanilla scent wrapped around me, and I could hear his sharp intake of breath as my peppermint-pine scent hit him.
The chat feed exploded.