Chapter 7
Seven
“Time you enjoy wasting was not wasted.”
—John Lennon
Linc had lived in a blissful state of denial for more than two months by the time Molly insisted they take a trip to Philadelphia so she could meet his family and they could share their plans with them.
He’d taken to life in Butler, Vermont, like the proverbial fish to water.
He loved everything about small-town living—the ability to walk to just about anywhere, the friendly people, the charming store that Molly’s family ran and, of course, Molly herself.
If she’d been lovely in Mississippi, she was even more so in her hometown, surrounded by her beloved family and friends.
After being there with her, he could plainly see that she wouldn’t be content anywhere else.
She had the same desire to travel and see the world that he had, but her home and her heart would always be in Vermont.
Before he met her, he would’ve wondered if he could be satisfied living in a small town like Butler, but if she was nearby, he had what he needed.
It was really that simple. And he loved working with her dad, even if he still treated him with the same suspicion he might bestow upon a serial killer who’d expressed an interest in dating his daughter.
Linc was able to see through the bluster.
He respected Elmer for being concerned about the man in his daughter’s life, but he was determined to prove he had nothing to worry about where Linc was concerned.
Linc wanted the same thing Elmer did—for Molly to be safe, happy and loved for the rest of her life.
He was more than prepared to live up to his end of that bargain, if only the showdown with his own family didn’t loom so large, like a black cloud hanging over his happily ever after.
“I’m sure that once they see we’re truly in love, they’ll be supportive,” Molly said as they worked late into the night at the barn in early October.
They planned to get married in January, after the holiday rush at the store, and he was counting the days until she was his wife.
He couldn’t wait to sleep with her in his arms every night for the rest of his life.
The time they spent at their future home filled him with anticipation for when they’d finally be living there together, rather than sleeping separately at her parents’ home, where he’d been relegated to the basement.
He’d been tempted to sneak upstairs, but after Elmer had staked out Molly’s room that first night and later shown him his hunting rifle, he’d chosen to stay put, which, of course, had been Elmer’s goal.
But here at the barn, they were completely alone, and even though they had more work to do than they could complete in a year, all he wanted was to be with her.
“I wish I was so certain,” Linc said. “Of course they’ll love you. Who wouldn’t? But they won’t be happy that I plan to live here rather than there. That doesn’t fit with their idea of how my life should unfold.”
“We’re planning a wedding that’s a couple of months away, and your parents don’t even know about me. I don’t feel right about that.”
He didn’t either. If only he wasn’t so afraid they were going to somehow ruin the best thing to ever happen to him.
“We’ll drive to Philly this weekend and get it taken care of. They have a right to know you’re getting married, Linc.”
“I guess.”
She sat on the floor of the room that would serve as their temporary bedroom while they worked on what would eventually be a two-story dwelling with plenty of bedrooms, painting the trim they’d installed over the weekend.
Their summer in Mississippi had prepared them well for the challenges they faced at the barn he’d bought sight unseen that did, in fact, still bear the faint aroma of cow shit.
Throughout those early months in Vermont, he’d known in the back of his mind that he needed to take steps that would bind him to his new life before he told his parents about the change in direction his life had taken.
Their engagement, his job and the purchase of the barn had been critical to that plan.
“I can’t believe they’ve thought you were in England all this time. It’s not right that you haven’t told them where you really are. My parents would lose their shit if I did that.”
He squatted behind her, moved her ponytail out of the way and nuzzled her neck, making her giggle.
“Linc! Stop. I’m painting.”
“Take a break. I want to show you something.”
“Let me just finish this section.”
He waited, not so patiently, for her to be done and then helped her up from the floor. “I hope you’re not regretting choosing me, since you’re having to spend every night working over here after working all day.”
“Are you kidding? I love that we’re doing this ourselves. Imagine how proud of it we’ll be when it’s finished.”
“If it’s ever finished.” The enormity of the task they’d taken on overwhelmed him at times, but she was completely unfazed.
“It will be, and people will come from all over to see our amazing home.”
He took her hand and led her outside, where the air had become crisp and chilly as September had faded into October.
The fall colors had dazzled him as he’d been introduced to an entirely new pastime called “leaf peeping.” According to Elmer, peeping season was the store’s busiest time of year—even more so than Christmas—and he was seeing that for himself as the autumn colors headed toward a spectacular peak.
“Where’re we going?” Molly asked as they trekked across their huge backyard.
“Follow me, and you shall see.”
“You’re being very mysterious.”
Smiling, he led her through the inky darkness to the place he’d set up for them earlier.
“I wanted to take you somewhere romantic, somewhere we could be alone, but I kept coming back to our own home.” He pulled out the flashlight he’d stashed in his coat pocket earlier and illuminated the tent he’d pitched.
“What do you have in mind?” she asked with a small, sexy smile.
“You know what I have in mind.”
“I thought we were going to wait.”
“I can’t wait. It’s all I think about. You’re all I think about. I can’t work or think or function, because all I want is to be with you. You’ve completely bewitched me.”
“I see the way you look at me in the office,” she said, stepping closer to him.
“How do I look at you?”
“Like you want to carry me out of there and have your wicked way with me.”
“That’s about right.”
“You’re a terrible distraction.”
“Am I?”
“You know you are.”
He held the tent flap for her, and she went in ahead of him to find the bed he’d made for them from an air mattress, sheets and a quilt he’d bought at the store two days ago, after Elmer had left for the day.
Linc suspected his future father-in-law probably knew about the purchase, even though he hadn’t been there.
“This is lovely,” Molly said, sitting on the bed.
“No, it isn’t, but it’s all ours, with no rifles around for miles.
Or so I hope.” Elmer had been rather quiet about them working at the barn late into the night.
Linc suspected that was because his sweet wife, Sarah, had told Elmer to leave them alone.
Molly’s mother had been nothing but warm and welcoming to Linc, and he would love her forever for that.
“It’s lovely because you did this for us.”
“I’m a selfish asshole because all I want in this entire world is to make love with you.”
“I want that, too.”
“You do?”
“Lincoln,” she said, laughing. “For someone so smart, you can be awfully dumb at times.”
“Hey!” He came down next to her, landing hard enough to bounce her and take full advantage of her being off-balance to arrange himself on top of her. “Hi.”
“Hi.”
“I can’t believe you’re being mean to me when I went to all this trouble to get you alone in the dark.”
“I’m not being mean. I’m laughing at you. Two very different things.”
“I’d much rather you use that sassy mouth to kiss me.”
“Before I do that, there’s something I need to tell you… Something I should’ve told you before now.”
The sadness and reluctance he heard in her tone put him on guard. He didn’t want to hear anything that would upset either of them. Not now, anyway. “What’s on your mind?”
“I… It’s something I don’t really talk about because it’s so painful.”
Linc moved so he was next to her, on his side facing her.
The flashlight he’d left on made it so he could see the furrow of her brows and an expression on her face he hadn’t seen before.
It looked a lot like grief. He cupped her cheek and ran his thumb over her soft skin.
“You don’t have to tell me if it hurts too much. ”
“I do have to tell you, and it’s not that I haven’t wanted to before now. It’s just that some things are almost unbearable.”
“I hate that something ever hurt you that way.”
“My mom says it’s the price you pay for loving someone, and I loved Andrew, from the time I was in seventh grade until he died our junior year of high school.”
“Oh God, Mol. I’m so sorry. What happened to him?”
“He was diagnosed with bone cancer in ninth grade. He fought it hard, and when we realized he was going to die… I, we, well…”
“You don’t have to say it. I get it.”
“I feel guilty that I’ve led you to believe I’ve never done it before.”
“I’m glad you got to have that experience with him, but I’m so sorry you lost him.”
“It’s the worst thing I’ve ever been through.
I wanted to die myself for a while afterward, but over time, I got past those feelings and started to get back to living.
I still feel guilty sometimes that I’m alive when he isn’t, and when I first met you, I felt super guilty for having those feelings for someone else.
That night in Mississippi when we were kissing, and I said I couldn’t… ”
“I understand, and nothing has to happen between us until you want it to. I want you to be comfortable.”