Chapter Twenty-Nine #2
Clamping her jaw shut, Beth shook her head, feeling terrible. Celia had welcomed her into her home and treated her as one of her own, and here Beth was, all but admitting that she planned to skip town without saying goodbye. She was a horrible, horrible person.
‘Well.’ Celia squeezed her arm again, looking almost too cheery. ‘We’ll see you again, I hope.’
Beth’s pulse thrummed in her ears as Celia moved off down the aisle, a rising sense of panic causing her blood to race through her veins.
‘Wait!’ she called out before she even knew what she was doing.
Celia turned back, her thoughts carefully masked with a schooled expression.
Taking a chance, or perhaps a risk, Beth closed the distance between them. ‘How’s Noah? Is he … okay?’
Dropping all pretence, Celia tilted her head in a gesture of sympathy. ‘Sweetheart, are you sure you want to know?’
Yet more dire possibilities raced through Beth’s mind, these visions even more tragic than before.
‘Yes,’ she whispered. ‘Please tell me.’
Celia studied her a moment longer, then glanced away and nodded, as if coming to the conclusion that she wasn’t breaking any confidences by telling Beth what she wanted to know.
‘He hasn’t told us anything, but it’s clear something’s happened between the two of you.
I think he’s having difficulty accepting it.
Ever since the funeral … well, it’s like he’s lost the spark he gained when you came to town.
He’s been morose, quite frankly.’ She hesitated, her frown deepening.
‘Did he tell you he applied for a business loan?’
‘No.’ Beth perked up. That, at least, was good news. If he was taking steps to make his dream come true, it was a sign that he’d be okay.
‘His application was rejected.’ Celia shook her head. ‘Mick and I offered to act as guarantors, but he’s refusing to let us use the farm as collateral.’
Of course he would. Because he appreciated his family and was incredibly loyal. Never in a million years would he risk his parents’ livelihood or their family’s legacy for a chance at chasing his dream.
‘Maybe …’ Celia rubbed her chin. ‘Maybe you could talk to him?’
Beth winced. ‘I’m not sure he’d listen to me.’
Aside from the fact that not even the greatest con man of all time could convince Noah to risk his family’s land, they hadn’t spoken since the day of the funeral. She’d sent him a text message the day after, explaining that she no longer needed his help to complete the work on the house.
Unsurprisingly, he’d called her immediately.
And when she’d let the call go to voicemail, he’d messaged, asking her to call him.
She’d ignored that, too, and after a few more fruitless attempts to contact her, he’d turned up and spent a good half-hour rapping on her front door and begging her to come out so they could talk.
She’d hidden behind the mountain of boxes in her front room, where she’d stayed until she heard him drive away.
‘I’m not sure why you think he wouldn’t,’ Celia told her now, arching a brow as if to make it clear she knew her son’s heart.
‘When he first admitted to us what he wanted to do with his life, he mentioned that you’d helped him realise his true passion and encouraged him to go for it.
You believed in him, Beth, and I’ve never seen him happier.
But now, it’s like he’s given up and he’s not interested in finding another way forward.
Maybe you can get through to him. Convince him to let his father and me help him. ’
Beth considered it, if only to give Celia a sliver of hope, though she knew those hopes would be dashed. Noah would not accept his parents’ help. But maybe …
Maybe there was another way.
‘Look,’ Celia blurted, ‘forget I said anything. It was unfair of me to ask when I know things aren’t right between—’
‘No, Celia, it’s okay.’ Beth took her hand and gave it a squeeze. ‘I’ll talk to him. I mean, I can’t promise it will help, but I’ll try.’
She had to do that much at least. After everything Noah had done for her, she couldn’t leave town without trying to convince him not to give up on his dream. Not when she’d been the one to dangle the proverbial carrot in front of his face in the first place.
Celia’s face lit up. ‘You will?’
Beth nodded. ‘I’ll do my best.’
She only hoped her best would be enough.
* * *
Beth was a bundle of nerves when she knocked on Noah’s door the following afternoon.
She hadn’t called ahead—of course she hadn’t—or sent a text.
That would’ve been horribly hypocritical, seeing as she’d all but ghosted him.
She wouldn’t be surprised if he told her to get lost when he saw it was her on his doorstep.
Clenching her fists at her sides, she sucked in a nervous breath as his footsteps echoed inside the house and a shadow appeared in the entry’s opaque glass panels. A second later, the door swung open and Noah stood before her.
Sensing surprise rather than hostility in his raised brows, she relaxed slightly and managed a tentative, ‘Hey.’
‘Er—’ Noah cleared his throat. ‘Hey.’
Raising an arm overhead, he wrapped his fingers around the door but made no move to let her in.
‘Can we talk?’
‘Um, yeah. Of course.’ He stepped back and swung the door wider, letting her in, then closed it behind her and led the way down the hall. ‘Can I get you a drink?’
‘Just water, please.’
While Noah busied himself in the kitchen, pulling glasses down from an overhead cupboard, Beth slipped through the back door to the verandah, taking what might be her last chance to soak in the view of the land that once might have been hers.
‘Here you go.’ Noah handed her a glass of chilled water with a slice of lemon. Just the way she liked it.
‘Thank you.’ She took a sip, using the moment to gather her thoughts. ‘I ran into your mum yesterday.’
Noah glanced at her, his glass raised halfway to his lips. ‘Yeah?’
‘She mentioned you applied for a business loan and didn’t get it.’
He delayed his response by taking a large swig from his glass. ‘Not sure why she’d volunteer that information.’
‘She only mentioned it because I asked how you were,’ Beth rushed to explain, not wanting to get Celia in trouble.
Noah leaned on the railing. ‘Why didn’t you ask me yourself?’
Flinching under his scrutiny, she looked away. ‘I’ve been dealing with some stuff.’
‘I could’ve helped you through it, you know. I still can.’
Her heart lurched in her chest, as if trying to launch itself into his hands, but she resisted inching closer. It was one thing to trust him to support her through her grief and another thing entirely to believe that he’d still want to be with her if he knew she was autistic.
She turned to him, not wanting to risk the pain of rejection but needing to see his reaction. ‘I came here today because I don’t want you to give up on your dream.’
His gaze dropped to her hands as she cupped them around her glass. ‘I’m trying not to, believe me.’
‘Then why won’t you let your parents help you?’
He scowled. Gave a slight shake of his head and pushed off the railing. ‘Not an option.’
‘Why not?’
He looked at her as if she’d lost her mind. ‘You know why. I’m not letting them risk everything for me.’
‘But they’re your parents and they believe in you. They want to support you.’
‘It’s not going to happen, Beth.’ He downed what was left in his glass, his throat working as he swallowed, but the tension in his jaw and shoulders remained.
Beth chewed the corner of her mouth. ‘What if there was another way?’
He eyed her sceptically.
‘Have you thought about finding investors?’
He blinked and turned to gaze out across the valley. A surge of excitement ran through her when he admitted, ‘I guess it could be an option.’
She grinned. ‘Personally, I think it’s an excellent option, which is why I’d like to invest.’
He said nothing.
‘I’d like to invest in your business,’ she clarified, in case he hadn’t heard her properly. ‘Don’t worry, I’d only be a silent partner, but I think—’
‘No. Absolutely not.’
‘Hang on, hear me out—’
‘Nope.’ He turned and walked inside.
‘Noah!’ She rushed after him. If he’d just let her explain … ‘I ran some numbers last night,’ she said once they were inside, ‘and I really think—’
‘Damn it, Beth!’ He slammed his empty glass on the kitchen counter. ‘I said no!’
She stood motionless as he glared at her, knuckles white as he gripped the bench, his body pulsing with negative energy.
‘Is this why you came here today?’ His gaze narrowed. ‘To offer me a business deal?’
‘W-well … yes.’ She studied him, hoping for a sign that might explain her misstep. ‘Noah, I don’t understand—’
He let out a humourless laugh, which made her feel positively pint-sized. ‘Let me make it clear for you, then. Under no circumstances will I be taking money from you. For any reason.’
Hot tears pricked at her eyes, threatening to spill over at any moment, but she wasn’t ready to give up. ‘I wouldn’t just be giving it to you, Noah. I’d be investing it.’
‘Oh, you want to invest it?’ He waved an arm in an over-the-top gesture, making his sarcasm abundantly clear.
She recoiled. Who even was this man?
He deflated instantly. ‘I’m sorry. I just …’
She waited. She’d made her offer. The ball was now in his court.
Sighing, he scrubbed a hand over his face, his eyes wet with unshed tears, and when he spoke, he sounded like a broken man.
‘I don’t want your money, Beth, and I don’t want you to be a silent partner in my business. I don’t even want to talk about the business, because all I want is you.’ He gave her a desperate, pleading look. ‘I just want you.’
Pressing her lips together, she turned away, unable to witness the pain and torment in his expression.
He didn’t know what he was saying. Because he didn’t know her, didn’t know all of her, at least. And he couldn’t want what he didn’t know. Besides, she couldn’t even accept that she might have a neurological disability, so why on earth would he?
‘Beth …’
His warm breath on the back of her neck made her shiver. He gripped her arms and turned her around. Lifted a hand and cupped her cheek, ran a thumb over her lip.
‘Please. Please, don’t push me away.’
Her heart rate quickened and her breath came uneven. She glanced up at him, close, so close, to pressing her mouth to his. But that would be a mistake.
She put a hand to his chest, holding him back. ‘I’m leaving.’
‘What?’ He looked slightly dazed still. ‘What do you mean?’
‘I got my job back at DHB and I’ve put in an offer on a place in Townsville. When I sell the house here, I want to use the money to invest in your business.’
Her words extinguished the light in his eyes and he stepped away from her.
‘Please, Noah, just think about it. I believe in you and the work you do. I want to take this chance. I want to help you.’
He tore his gaze from hers, turned and made his way over to the couch. Fell onto it with an air of defeat.
An age passed before he spoke. ‘Why should I let you?’
Confused, she shook her head. ‘I’m sorry, I don’t—’
‘Why should I let you help me when you’re not willing to let me or anyone else help you?’
She had no response to that. Because he had a point.
‘I’m sorry, Beth.’ He glanced up at her, giving her one last tortured look. ‘If you’re not willing to take a chance on us, then I … I want you to leave.’
Her heart split in two, agonisingly slowly. She would never recover. She’d always known it, but now she was experiencing it.
Pain like she’d never known.
With a weak nod, she accepted her fate, then turned and left without a word.