Homecoming for Beginners

Chapter 3

OLLIE ONLY meant to take Theo to the playground. It was supposed to be a nice afternoon where Theo could be a normal kid. A slide, some swings, a merry-go-round that made Ollie dizzy with memory just looking at it—and he flew heavy machinery for a living.

Or he used to.

Unfortunately for Ollie, his sister happened to be at the park with her kid, and she happened to text his mother a photo, and now instead of a nice Saturday at the park with his kid, he was having a less relaxing Saturday at the park with his kid and his mom.

It wasn’t Cassie’s fault. She hadn’t realized Theo was in the shot.

“Oliver, you know we’d love to have you—”

“Mom.” Ollie tore his eyes away from Theo’s attempt to swing over the top of the swing set and called upon years of military discipline to keep his voice even. Who knew that would have so many real-world applications when it came to his family? “I’m not moving in with you. We need our own space.”

His mother had never met a weakness she wouldn’t exploit to get her way. “Your father and I have plenty of room now that your brothers and sisters are out of the house. And it would give us a chance to get to know your son.” Ollie had had to physically intervene to keep her from going right over to Theo when she arrived.

“That is not what I meant, Mom.” He shook his head. “Besides, Theo isn’t ready for that. He lost his mother a few months ago. He’s only just starting to trust me, and I’ve known him since he was born.” Not that he’d been there for it. It’s complicated didn’t exactly describe the relationship between Ollie and Theo’s mom. They were friends who’d had an IVF baby. As an asexual woman, she hadn’t wanted a partner; as a former foster kid, she’d wanted a sperm donor who’d be there for her kid if something happened to her.

Neither of them expected something to happen to her.

“I’m thirty-six years old,” she’d said. “I know it’s crazy, but it might be my last chance. ”

Ollie had always wanted a family of his own. Her proposition was a little untraditional, but it worked perfectly for them. While he was deployed, she fostered his relationship with Theo as much as she could. When he was on leave, he stayed with them at their apartment and soaked up Dad time.

And then she died and Ollie got involuntarily separated for dependency.

“He’s my grandson ,” his mother pressed—just as Theo took a flying leap off the swing.

Ollie’s heart climbed into his throat as his kid sailed through the air, flailing his arms wildly like there was no chance the impact with the ground would crush his frail body. “Theo!”

And he landed on his feet with a broad grin and whooped. “Dad, Dad! Did you see—”

Ollie took a deep breath and willed his organs back behind his rib cage. He wasn’t going to be the reason his kid was afraid to live his life. Theo was getting stronger every day. It was Ollie who was really fragile, inside rather than out. “I sure did, bud!” He took a few steps away from his mother and kneeled down so he could look Theo in the eye. “I think your cousin did too, though, and she’s a little too young to jump off swings, right?”

Theo turned and looked at Mel, who was furiously pumping her legs like she needed to prove she could swing as high as the cousin she’d just met. “I guess?”

Please let this work. “We wouldn’t want her to hurt herself, right? But she looks up to you. Do you think maybe you can save the jumping for when it’s just us?”

“Okay,” Theo agreed without a second thought, and he went right back to the swing without a care in the world.

Ollie was totally getting the hang of this parenting thing. Of course, the fifteen-second interaction left him feeling like he’d run a marathon, but he wasn’t going to let on to his mother. He walked back toward her with his hands in his jeans pockets. “Look, Mom. I know you love him and want to spend time with him. But he barely even knows you right now. He’s going to need time— we’re going to need time, together.”

It wasn’t that Ollie didn’t love and trust his parents. He did. But they were so good at projecting what they wanted onto people. He was afraid they’d learn Theo was allergic to bees and never let him play outside. He was afraid they’d learn he was smart and decide he should become a doctor. Ollie didn’t want Theo to end up like him, so pressured into choosing the path his parents wanted for him that he signed up to shoot people in another country instead. At least that let him feel like he could make a difference, which was all he really wanted.

It hadn’t taken long for disillusionment to set in. He was lucky he ended up in aviation. Learning to fly had probably saved his life.

“But where are you going to live? You aren’t working right now. Who’s going to rent an apartment to you?”

“I’m a veteran, Mom.” He had the equivalent of a year’s pay as severance, and it wasn’t like he’d had a lot of expenses living on base for the past ten years. “I have enough savings to keep us afloat for a few months while I find a job that’ll let me spend good quality time with Theo.”

And if he moved into his own place, he’d never have to deal with his parents overhearing one of his nightmares, or the I-told-you-so s that would follow. Ollie didn’t really believe in God, but he was thankful to someone out there that Theo was a heavy sleeper.

“But we could watch him for you—”

“I’m sure you will. I’m not saying I’m not going to let you help.” He took her hands. “I’m saying you have to let me ask for it. Okay? Theo and I both need to prove that we can do this.”

She sighed heavily. “At least let me make you dinner.”

Ollie’s frustration must’ve shown on his face, because she quickly added, “ To go . Okay? I’ll make your favorite meatloaf and you can pick it up. And then maybe next week we can eat together at a restaurant somewhere?”

No , Ollie wanted to say, but he knew it wasn’t rational. He would need his parents’ help. At some point Theo should get to know them. Allison had wanted that for him. And they were going to have to eat dinner anyway. He couldn’t keep Theo to himself forever; it wouldn’t keep him any safer, and it would only damage his social development.

“I’ll pick up dinner,” he relented. “Thank you. And I’ll think about the restaurant.”

“All right,” his mother said finally.

Ollie tried not to sigh. They both knew it was only a matter of time before she wore him down .

His mother left the park to start on dinner, and Ollie spent the rest of the afternoon pretending he wasn’t freaking out. What was he doing, really? He’d been a full-time parent for four months. He’d left behind the only adult life he’d ever known to be there for his son, and he’d do it again in a heartbeat.

But he’d never had to find an apartment before. Never had to find a job. Fuck, on Monday he had to register Theo for school . Could he even do that if they were still living in a motel?

At least most bills these days could be set to autopay so he wouldn’t forget and end up with the water turned off or something.

Those thoughts consumed him as he drove to his parents’ place to pick up a truly obscene portion of his favorite dinner, crammed into an overloaded Tupperware container, and a plastic picnic cutlery set and some plates, which made him feel stupid. Of course the motel didn’t have dinnerware. He’d have to buy that too, unless he’d somehow managed to pack up Allison’s when they were leaving her place.

He barely registered the taste of the food as they ate, even though Theo inhaled his like he had a hollow leg. But his motivation became clear when he finished and looked at Ollie with familiar hazel eyes and asked, “Can I watch cartoons now, Dad?”

Ollie had a strict no-TV-while-eating policy. “Sure,” he said. “And then it’s time for a bath, kiddo.”

Theo wrinkled his nose. “Okay.”

The distraction gave Ollie time to scroll through local rental listings on his phone. Ideally he’d like to get a little bungalow, something with a yard for Theo to play in, but that meant working out lawn care and maybe gardening, shoveling snow in the winter, that kind of thing. All that would be fine, except he was already going to be cooking and shopping and doing laundry—the trappings of a civilian life he was still getting used to. An apartment made more sense, at least until he had a handle on all the other life crises he had going on. So an upper unit in a duplex, or an apartment or condo, then. Two bedrooms. Close to the school would be good—Ollie wanted to be able to drive Theo in without being late for work.

Whatever work was going to look like .

Apparently he’d gotten bored with TV, because the cartoons were still playing, but he had dug out The Lightning Thief and was curled up against the headboard of his bed, engrossed.

Ollie had a lot of feelings about that particular choice of book, which was about a kid whose mom got turned to stone, and then went to a camp for demigods, where he seemed to be in constant peril. Ollie was worried that the loss of Percy’s mother might hit a little close to home, or that Theo might be upset when Percy got his mother back, because Theo couldn’t. But Theo’s therapist in DC had said that Theo’s love of fantasy and ghost stories might not be a bad thing, that working out his feelings through fiction could be helpful, and that Ollie should let Theo take the lead unless problems arose.

Ollie was pretty sure by “problems” she didn’t mean “parental overthinking.” He should probably get his own therapist.

But that could wait until after he had a job and a place to live.

Ollie let himself browse Indeed for half an hour before he nudged Theo into the bathroom. He left the door cracked open so he could make sure Theo didn’t fall asleep in there while Ollie pulled out his laptop to start updating his résumé.

Truthfully, none of the jobs excited him—at least none of the ones he could do and still get to spend every night with his kid. But Ollie didn’t have to like his job; he just needed something to pay his bills. He applied for a job at an armored truck company, one in some kind of warehouse, and a real estate reception position. At that point his vision started to swim.

He poked his head into the bathroom. “All right, buddy, are you clean? I think it’s time for bed.”

Despite having whined about bathtime, Theo had happily splashed water all over the floor and drawn on the tile with his bath crayons. Ollie recognized a sun, some birds, the swing set from earlier in the day, and Theo’s latest fixation, a row of headstones. “Can I read one more chapter?”

“Half a chapter, and we read it together.” That way Ollie could keep an eye on it. Back when Theo was recovering from chemo, he’d been too weak and tired to hold the books himself. Ollie would never miss seeing him like that, but the ritual of reading to him had taken on its own importance. For ten years he’d had the military to structure his days. He felt unbalanced without a routine .

“Okay,” Theo said with the exasperation only an eight-year-old could manage. “But you have to work on your Chiron voice, Dad, it’s silly.”

Ollie held up the towel for him to step into. “You like my silly voices.”

OWNING A CENTURY -old mansion was a lot of work.

With nothing else to fill his weekend, Ty set about making the place habitable. It took him the better part of a day to go through and organize the stuff his dad had piled up all over the house. Most of it was headed straight for Goodwill or the trash, but every few hours he found a keepsake of his mother’s that stopped him in his tracks with fresh grief.

But not for his dad.

Sunday the real work began. Ty took down the curtains and rolled up the carpets. He dragged all that to the sun porch at the back of the house so he could have someone pick it up to be cleaned. Then he pulled the cushions off the furniture and stripped the beds—all eight of them. Anything too moth-eaten to use went into a trash bag. The washing machine went nonstop. He deep-cleaned the kitchen and the bathroom closest to his bedroom, then ordered takeout and passed out in front of his laptop after half a beer.

And then it was finally Monday, and Ty had something to do . Thank God.

He showered and shaved and dressed in a pair of his blue work pants and a plain T-shirt. He still hadn’t done a proper grocery shop, so he ate leftover takeout for breakfast, brushed his teeth, and then drove to the school. Henry had said there would be paperwork to fill out, and in the afternoon he’d have to stop by the police station for a background check—Ty wasn’t looking forward to those memories—but since he had an active paramedic certification in another state, they were pretty sure he wasn’t a risk to students.

Embarrassingly, it was only seven thirty when Ty stepped into the office at the school. Sure, he had good memories of this place—before his mom died and everything turned to shit—but seven thirty? Ty was turning into a suck-up in his adulting years.

He didn’t have long to feel self-conscious about it, because the woman behind the front desk looked up and caught his eye and Ty almost swallowed his tongue. “Holy shit—Peggy? ”

“Tyler Morris!”

Ty barely had time to brace himself before five foot two inches of ballistic human hit him in the chest. Peggy hadn’t grown much since high school, even if she was now part of running the place.

“You are the last person I expected to see here again,” she said when she’d released her death grip on his rib cage. Then she paled and amended, “Oh God, I didn’t mean that in an offensive way, just—uh, I remember you swearing you were never going to come back here, so… I guess you’re in town for the funeral?” Her face fell. “Shit, I would’ve gone if I realized—”

“It’s good to see you too, Peggy,” he interrupted before she could work herself into a froth. Apparently not everyone in town hated him after all. “It’s been a long time. Yeah, I’m here for—well, not only the funeral, I guess. I have to sort out a few things.” Like his entire life. He cleared his throat. “Uh, I’m actually here because I need to fill out some paperwork so I can help out Coach Tate?”

“Oh, you’re the one!” She beamed at him even as she shook her head and retreated behind her desk to find the appropriate folder. “When I heard the rumor, I thought it was going to be Ollie Kent.”

There was that name again. Ty told himself he wasn’t going to be jealous. He cleared his throat. “I’ve heard that name a few times. Do you know the guy?”

Oh God, was that a blush spreading across her cheeks? “Everybody knows Ollie. We actually dated for a hot minute in high school, if you believe that.”

“Why wouldn’t I believe that?” Peggy was smart and pretty, even if she’d never had the ego to think of herself as one of the popular girls.

Before she could answer, a man in chinos and a polo shirt breezed into the office. “Morning, Peggy.” He collected a folder from his mail slot, saluted her with it, and then breezed back out before she could even reply.

Peggy huffed a sigh and briefly looked around as though she was worried someone might overhear. “I don’t know. I mean, jock was never really my type, right? Ollie was so sweet, though. I had to give it a shot. It wasn’t a bad breakup or anything, just awkward when he came in this morning and I thought the volunteer forms were for him.”

Right, of course—Ollie would have to register Theo for school. Apparently he wasn’t wasting any time on that if he’d made it here before Ty this morning. Back when Ty attended, this place only hosted grades seven through twelve, but the town had expanded it to include elementary grades. “Maybe give him a little time before you let Coach rope him into extracurricular commitments.”

She laughed. “Oh my God. Henry would be over the moon if he managed to wrangle both of you.”

Not much chance of that, Ty thought, with Ollie having Theo to look after. “So I just fill this out and then…?”

“Then I imagine Henry will pick you up and put you on a leash and parade you around like a prize-winning Dalmatian.” She slid a pen across the counter. “I would love to chat more, but it’s about to be bonkers in here. Catch up this weekend, maybe?” She tapped the paperwork. “I can get your number from the forms if you’re cool with it.”

“That sounds nice. Thanks.” Ty saluted with his folder the same way the teacher who’d come in earlier had, and then got out of the way as Peggy’s prediction came true and the office became a bustle of activity. He retreated to the detention desk outside the office. Cramming himself into it at six foot two was a lot harder than he remembered.

He’d only gotten as far as the third line on the form when a familiar voice said, “Tyler Morris. Now this sight does take me back.”

Ty worked hard to not jump. He raised his head and pasted on a smile. “Principal Gupta.” He hadn’t realized she was still running this place, or he probably wouldn’t have accepted Coach’s invitation to return. At the very least, he’d have picked someplace less conspicuous to fill out the paperwork. “Uh. Hi.”

“I don’t believe the designers of that desk had you in mind when they built it,” she went on, as though it wasn’t awkward at all to run into the adult version of a kid she’d expelled. “Why don’t you come on into my office? I think I have a chair that’ll fit you.”

He couldn’t read her tone, which left him feeling a lot like the sullen teenager he’d been the last time he walked these halls. But she was in charge here, and if he wanted to help Henry out, he had to stay on her good side.

He didn’t like the principal’s office any better as an adult than he had as a kid, but at least she couldn’t kick him out of school this time. Ty settled into a chair and started to cross his arms defensively. Then he caught himself and forced his palms down against his thighs. So much better.

“Coffee?” Principal Gupta gestured to a sideboard that hosted a fancy Nespresso machine.

Ty was stunned into answering, “Yes, please,” before his brain could engage.

Principal Gupta wouldn’t poison him just to keep him from corrupting the baseball team, right?

She made him a mug, carried it over to the desk, slid it in front of him, and then took her own seat. “I was sorry to hear about your father.”

I wasn’t , Ty thought, and then felt like an asshole. Fortunately some preprogrammed part of his brain answered out loud instead. “Thank you.”

“Although your father and I had our share of differences.” She sipped her own coffee. “Now I understand you’re volunteering to help our hapless team remember which end of the bat they should be holding?”

Oh boy. Ty moved his mug away from his lips. “Uh, it’s possible Coach Tate didn’t put it in exactly those words.”

“He’s a sneaky one.” She shook her head. “Anyway, we all appreciate it. It’s good to have you back around here.”

Maybe you shouldn’t have sent me away in the first place , Ty thought, but he managed not to say that out loud either. “Thanks.”

“Anyway.” She smiled. “I’ve got to go make the morning rounds, but feel free to use my desk to fill out that paperwork, okay?”

Nothing about coming back to this town was going the way he expected.

He finished the paperwork and left it with Peggy at the desk—she was surrounded by a crowd of four adults and two kids—just in time to run into Coach Tate.

“Ty. You’re here early.” Henry grinned at him. “Paperwork all done? Great. I’ll give you the ten-cent tour.”

“Did they move the ball diamond?”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” said Henry serenely, “did you have somewhere to be?”

And no. No, Ty did not. He straightened his shoulders. “Nah. Lead the way, Coach.”

With half an ear, Ty listened as Henry recounted the past sixteen years of the school’s history. Not much had changed apart from a few upgrades here and there and some retirements. Ty only recognized a handful of the teachers .

He got to see the teachers’ lounge, which was honestly not as exciting as it sounded when he was a kid, just a painted cinderblock room with some old couches and a bunch of desks and a kitchenette, then the health and phys ed office, which was smaller and smelled like feet but had a mini fridge stocked with Gatorade.

“Somehow this is a lot less glamorous than I remembered,” Ty commented.

“Maybe you got us mixed up with your fancy school.”

There it was again—another reminder that Ty hadn’t been good enough sixteen years ago, and he was only good enough now because he was offering free labor. Suddenly he felt like he was going to throw up. Why was he doing this to himself?

Ty fought the urge to push back, but he could feel the words chafing in his throat now. The more he did it, the harder it got to breathe. Soon he’d be choking on them.

Instead of speaking, he grabbed a random textbook off the shelf behind Henry’s desk and leafed through it. The tops of the pages were caked with dust. The thing had to be older than Ty was. “You’re not still using this to teach, are you?” he asked. The cover had indicated it was some kind of first-aid book. “Because they changed the compressions-to-breaths ratios for CPR.”

“Yeah, they covered that one in our professional development training. The one with the active shooter drills.”

Jesus. Ty put the book back on the shelf. “You do not get paid enough.”

“Don’t think any of us got into it for the money.” Henry glanced at his watch. “I’ve got a class this morning. You want to sit in? Otherwise I’ve gotta go. The kids get real nosy when you’re late.”

Ty had no idea why—not why Henry asked, and not why he agreed—but he shrugged and said, “Sure. Lead the way.”

It turned out to be a gym class of tenth-grade boys. Henry introduced him as “Mr. Morris, who’s going to be shadowing me today,” and then went right into assigning warm-up exercises. The class ran two laps at a jog, and then Henry selected kids at random and called out a muscle group to have them demonstrate stretches.

“I love a pass/fail mark,” he confided to Ty as they stood against the gym wall. “Nice to be able to give everyone perfect on something, even if they have lousy hand-eye coordination.” After each kid demonstrated a correct stretch, he put a checkmark next to their name.

“You probably shouldn’t brag about that in front of the English teachers.”

Henry grinned. “Mum’s the word.”

After that they didn’t get to talk much, with Henry busy directing the kids through the finer points of the rules of basketball. Ty sat on one of the old wooden benches near the wall, observing.

But that grain of sand kept chafing. Henry treated his students fairly, with an even mixture of discipline and good humor. He didn’t put up with bad behavior or kids mistreating each other, but he didn’t raise his voice unless he needed to make himself heard over the racket in the gym, and he had kind words for everyone.

All those kids… by now some of them must be on their second or third or fourth chances with Henry. Ty remembered what it was like to be a teenage boy—more attitude and hormones than brains. None of these kids had gotten kicked off the baseball team and expelled.

Ty knew he hadn’t been an easy teenager, but he wasn’t a bad one either. His mother had just died. Why hadn’t he gotten another chance?

And could he really do this volunteering thing without clearing it up?

He couldn’t. At ten minutes to the bell, Coach dismissed the kids to change and shower, and Ty shoved his hands into his pockets and made himself get up. If he didn’t ask now, he’d stew forever.

“Hey, uh, Coach, I gotta ask—why did you… I mean, after everything that happened.” Ty huffed, hating himself as much for needing to know as for his inability to get the words out. “You guys kicked me out of school as a kid, but it’s okay that I’m back now? You and Principal Gupta are acting like nothing ever happened. Well, mostly.” He couldn’t have the rug pulled out from under him again.

Henry frowned. “We didn’t kick you out of school.”

What was he talking about? “Uh, yeah, you did. I think I’d remember. After the chicken fiasco in Gupta’s office? I’m not saying I didn’t deserve to be punished—”

“Ty. You didn’t get kicked out of school.” Henry shook his head. “Principal Gupta and I agreed. You were grieving the loss of your mother, so you lashed out. It wasn’t appropriate or constructive, but it was certainly understandable. We decided on a three-day in-school suspension, and you’d have to sit out the first baseball game of the season and clean up the mess the chickens left in the office.”

Ty blinked as that uncomfortable grain of sand grew heavy and sank into his stomach. “I don’t understand. If I wasn’t expelled, then why…?”

Why did I have to change schools? This was the only one in town. Changing schools had meant boarding at Northeast Academy. If he hadn’t been expelled, then he wouldn’t have had to leave. He could have stayed with his friends. He could have visited his mother’s grave. Instead—

“Your father thought it would be best if you got a fresh start somewhere else.” Ty didn’t know if Henry put the sarcasm in his voice on purpose, but he heard Your dad thought we were all too soft and this was the perfect excuse to get you out of the house for good . “I didn’t know he told you otherwise. I’m sorry.”

Of course. Fuck. Ty should’ve guessed years ago, but he’d never questioned it. He knew he was a pain in the ass. He’d spent half his life fucking around. It had only been a matter of time before the find out part came around.

He just hadn’t expected his own father to be the one to hurry that along.

“Right.” Ty cleared his throat. “I, ah, I actually think I need some air. I’ll come find you at lunchtime?”

The kindness and understanding in Henry’s eyes almost undid him. “Sure, Ty. Of course.”