Chapter 5
“Ithought you weren’t coming.”
Ellie spun around at the deep, gravelly voice. Phoenix emerged from the shadows like a specter—so stealthy, she hadn't heard him coming.
"I decided I wanted to. It's a good routine to get into," she countered, then flushed. Was that too defensive? The last thing she wanted was to make him think she'd gotten up early to see him.
He gave her a strange look. "I just meant it’s refreshing to see you. It's been a pretty boring night."
"That's a good thing, right?" she replied, after a moment's hesitation. He was just being friendly. She needed to lighten up.
He chuckled, his eyes sparkling in the predawn light. "In this job, definitely."
Ellie laid her mat on the ground and kicked off her shoes. As usual, the day was dawning clear and bright, the sky mostly cloudless indigo with a faint slash of pink over the horizon.
"Do you do yoga every morning?" He was staring at her pink toenails. She'd had them done on a whim before leaving Scotland.
"If I can, but rigs don't often offer this kind of opportunity. The last one I worked on was operational 24/7, so I couldn't workout outside. It's just with all this beauty around me—" She waved her hand in the fresh morning air. "It would be a shame not to."
He stood, legs slightly apart, shoulders relaxed, holding his weapon in front of him, seemingly at ease. Ellie couldn't read the expression on his face, but it was almost like he was measuring her up. She'd love to know what he was thinking. Probably that a dirty rust-bucket in the middle of the ocean was no place for a woman. Well, if that's what he thought, then he could?—
"Where'd you work before?"
His question surprised her. She was expecting a disparaging remark. This was when they usually said something like, Do you enjoy working on oil rigs? Or It's a strange occupation for a girl.
"North Sea. Clair Ridge, Platform 44." The words rolled off her tongue with pride.
His blue eyes widened. "North Sea. Wow. How long were you out there for?"
Okay, so maybe he wasn't thinking that. There was only admiration in his warm gaze. "Just over two years."
He whistled softly. "That's a long time. I knew a guy who worked out there. He said the money was good, but the weather was goddamn awful." He glanced out at the dark blue expanse of ocean. "I'd take a pay cut for this any day."
He had a faraway look in his eye, like he was someplace else. She followed his gaze, enjoying the gentle breeze on her face. "Can't argue with that." As the seconds ticked by, she realized she knew very little about him. "Where were you before?"
He hesitated, then dragged his gaze back to her. "My last op was in Afghanistan."
She nodded. "I worked in Saudi Arabia for a while, before the North Sea assignment. It was my first job after college."
His eyes narrowed, almost wistfully. "I never got used to the sun over there. Big blazing ball of fire in the sky. In summer, the heat was pretty relentless."
"I remember." It had been the same where she had worked at the oil field. "Thank God everywhere had AC."
He snorted. "Not where I was. Dehydration was a real threat."
She could imagine. "Do you miss it?"
He started. "Why’d you ask that?"
She shrugged. "Just an impression I got listening to you talk about it, that's all."
His shoulders slumped. "I don't miss it, although I do miss my buddies."
She knew what that was like. "I'm sure. I miss my friends on the 44, too."
He tilted his head and studied her. Ellie felt a surprise flutter in her stomach. What the hell? She didn’t normally go for this type of guy. Base, brute strength and brawn. When she thought about settling down one day, it was usually with a scientist, a professor of geology or an engineer. Someone with shared interests and a dazzling intellect.
Not someone like… him.
Then she got it. It was so much that she was attracted to Phoenix as he intrigued her—and she'd always loved a good mystery. Whether it was analyzing samples to see what secrets they held or doing a crossword puzzle on a rainy day, she liked to solve things. Even as a kid she'd enjoyed breaking stuff down into its core parts to see what it was made of.
"I guess you know what it's like, then."
“Huh?”
“Missing your friends.” He gave her a quizzical look.
“Oh, yeah.” She nodded, silently chastising herself for losing concentration.
A pause stretched between them.
Eventually, he said, "Well, duty calls. I've got to continue with my rounds. Catch you later.”
“Yeah. See ya.”
He gave a quick nod then disappeared around the corner of the rig into the predawn shadows.
Phoenix sat in the cafeteria, coffee in hand, flipping through a discarded issue of Oil & Gas Magazine. He sensed Ellie walk in before he saw her. Looking up, he noticed she was alone, and by the expression on her face, deep in thought. Eyes fixed on the ground, she nearly bumped straight into another worker.
“Oh, I’m sorry,” she said, without glancing up. He watched as she wove around more people then sat on one of the armchairs near the coffee station to the side of the main dining area.
She didn’t get a beverage, nor did she look up. She simply sat there, staring out of the smudgy window in front of her at the blurry expanse of blue ocean, a confused expression on her face.
Wondering if he was doing the right thing, Phoenix rose and went over. She glanced up as he eased his frame into the vacant armchair beside her. “Something wrong?”
“Oh, hi. I didn’t realize you were here.”
“I know. You were miles away.”
A self-conscious laugh. “Yeah, I’m trying to figure something out, and to be honest, I’m finding it pretty tough.”
“Anything I can help with?”
A wry smile played at her lips. “That’s kind of you, but I don’t think so.”
“Why? Because I wouldn’t understand?” He bit out the words without thinking. Damn it. He hadn’t meant to sound so cutting, especially not when he was trying to help.
Her eyebrows rose. “Are you a chemist?”
“No, but that doesn’t mean I won’t be able to help in some other way.”
She stared at him a long moment, then gave a nod. “Okay, fine.”
He held up a finger. “Wait. Let me get you some coffee first, then you can tell me, and I’ll see if I can offer any assistance.”
She laughed, her shoulders relaxing. “Okay, deal.”
He went over to the machine, fixed her a cup just how he figured she'd like it—no sugar, straightforward, like her. Handing her the cup, he watched as she took an absentminded sip. It must be okay, as she didn’t complain, simply nodded her thanks.
“Okay, what’s up?” he prodded, sitting down again.
She wrapped her hands around the mug, as if she needed the comfort it gave her. Those small hands, elegant and ladylike. “I’ve now analyzed the samples from all three test sites, and there is no evidence of hydrocarbons. Nothing. But according to the geological reports, there should be.”
She was right. He knew nothing about oil reservoirs, but it might help her to talk it out. “These are the geological reports you were looking at the other day?”
She nodded.
“What are the reports based on?”
“Seismic reflection imaging, mostly.”
Was his expression as blank as his mind at that moment? Must have been, as she offered a brief smile with an explanation.
“The geological survey company bounces sound waves through the rock surface and captures the echoes with sensors. The different angles provide a picture from beneath the surface of the site being surveying.”
“And that pinpoints where the oil is?”
“Sort of. We then run the data through high-performance computers using complicated algorithms to produce a geological map. That gives us images we can interpret and analyze.” She smiled self-consciously. “I sound like a complete geek, huh?”
“No. I actually understood that,” he said with a self-conscious chuckle. He must be nuts if he thought he had anything in common with this woman. She was smart, sassy, and driven. She solved the earth’s deepest mysteries while he… he was built for battle, not brains.
“Suzi’s looked at them too,” she continued, oblivious to his self-deprecating thoughts, “and we’re in agreement. The reservoirs are beneath us, but we’re not finding anything but rock, sand, and seawater.”
Phoenix thought about this. “What does Henderson say?”
“That’s the strange thing. He doesn’t seem concerned. I told him we should have found evidence of oil by now, but he just told me to keep trying. That we’ll find it in one of the samples.”
“Maybe he’s right. Could be you’re worrying for nothing.”
She frowned. “Maybe. But one of the samples isn’t enough. It won’t be economically viable. I was expecting to get results from all the test samples. I’ll try again tomorrow. The company is employing me to get results. I’ll just have to keep digging until I find something.”
He gave an uncertain nod. He might not know the first thing about seismic surveys or oil reservoirs, but he knew about duty and dedication—and Ellie had those in spades.
She bit her lip. “I’m sorry. Here I am waffling on about my work problems. How was your day?”
“Uneventful. I slept most of the morning, then worked out in the gym. You know how it is.”
She gave an understanding nod. There were only so many things you could do on the rig in your down time.
“What made you go into private security?” she asked, and he knew she was just being polite and making conversation.
He shrugged. “Seemed like a good idea at the time.”
"You don't like talking about yourself much, do you?" The way she was staring at him seemed like she had him pegged. Maybe she did.
He masked a grin. "Occupational hazard. I was in the Navy for nearly twenty years. Uncle Sam doesn't like us talking about operational stuff, so we learn to keep our mouths shut."
She nodded. "I get that. It's the same in my industry, but not because we can't talk about our work—although sometimes we can’t. It's more because nobody else understands what we're talking about." Her lips curled.
He tried not to notice how enticing they were.
“Chemical engineering isn’t the most exciting job in the world. Not like what you do.”
“Private security can be pretty boring too,” he said, thinking about last night, patrolling around the deserted rig, staring at nothing by blackness.
“I guess so, but you’ve seen your share of action. I can tell by the way you don’t want to talk about it. We always avoid subjects we don’t want to talk about.”
He stared at her, long and hard. What was she? A shrink too? “What do you know about that?
She shrugged, and he recalled the look in her eyes when he’d had her pinned to the ground the day before. Fear and panic, followed by a frenzied determination to throw him off. Anger, when she couldn’t.
He’d been right. She’d experienced a traumatic event herself. One that she couldn’t forget—or talk about.
“I know more than you think,” she said softly, confirming his thoughts.
He detected a hint of sadness. As he knew very well, it was impossible to turn back time. How often had he wished that very thing? To go back to that day in Basra, to have that moment again.
The problem was, orders were orders. Truth be told, he’d have to make the same decision. The one that condemned his friends to a certain death.
Fuck.
It was on the tip of his tongue to ask her what it was that she couldn’t let go of, but he didn’t. Not because he didn’t want to know—he was definitely curious—but because he wasn’t sure he should. It was too easy talking to her. Getting personal meant crossing a line, and crossing lines led to other things like sharing confidences. Give and take. He’d have to reciprocate, and he couldn’t do that.
Not yet.
Not to anyone.
Not even to a beautiful engineer who, under normal circumstances, he wouldn’t mind getting to know.
Phoenix cleared his throat ignoring the pang of regret. As much as he wanted to confide in her, he couldn’t. He was a mess—his head was all over the place. Opening up to her would just mean adding to that mess.
Besides, she was way out of his league. He’d just be opening himself up for disappointment. That was why he’d walked away that morning too. Made some dumb excuse about carrying on with his rounds. He could have spared a few more moments talking with her. Hell, with Boomer on the other side of the rig, he could have spared another hour, but he’d bailed.
Why?
The little voice that said he wasn’t worthy. And it was shouting at him now.
He stood. “I’ve gotta get ready.”
Ellie gave a little nod. “Thanks for the coffee—and for listening.”
“I thought maybe if you got it off your chest, it would help a little.”
“It did.” She smiled, melting his heart just a little.
“See ya, Ellie.”
“Bye, Phoenix.”
He walked away, feeling her amber gaze burning a hole in his back.