Chapter 33
Phoenix found himself praying as he gripped Ellie's hand and felt her pulse flutter weakly beneath his fingers.
Please don't let her die.
I promise I'll be the kind of man she deserves.
I'll protect her.
I'll make her happy.
His bargaining continued as the ambulance cut through the night, its sirens crying through the otherwise quiet streets. Ellie lay on the gurney, her face ashen, the steady drip of an IV the only barrier between her and death.
Phoenix watched the paramedics work calmly and quickly to stabilize her, administering oxygen and monitoring her vitals, keeping up a steady stream of medical jargon that he could barely follow.
His own heart pounded in his ears as the memory of finding Ellie convulsing from the poison played on a loop in his mind. He should never have left her alone, never underestimated Henderson. Now, all he could do was hold her hand and hope it wasn't too late.
As the ambulance thundered toward the hospital, he leaned close, murmuring into her ear. "Stay with me, Ellie. Fight this. You've got to fight."
Outside, the city passed in a blur, the bright flares of streetlamps streaking by like falling stars. The ambulance maneuvered through the traffic with urgent haste, every turn and stop jarring them, but Phoenix's gaze remained fixed on Ellie, his grip on her hand unyielding.
He couldn't lose her too. Not after all they'd been through together. He'd known from the first moment he'd tackled her on the helipad in her yoga outfit that she was someone special. At first, he'd thought she was too good for him, but she'd convinced him that he was wrong.
He recalled the way she looked at him with awe, like he was some sort of hero because he'd been trained to save lives and to keep going no matter the odds. He couldn't believe he'd inspired her to be stronger, braver. To get over her panic attacks.
Truth be told, she made him feel like the man he used to be—and wanted to be again.
She made him feel like he was worthy of her love.
In the sterile, blinding brightness of the ambulance, with the sharp smell of antiseptic in the air and the cold touch of metal all around, his world narrowed to the sound of Ellie's strained breathing and the paramedics' steady efforts to save her.
His training had prepared him for many things, but not how to deal with the crippling helplessness of watching Ellie fight for her life.
Phoenix paced up and down the corridor, the harsh fluorescent lights hammering his senses.
"Hey, buddy, we heard what happened," Boomer said, running up to him. Phoenix gave him a brief hug, then turned to Pat and Blade, who'd come in after him.
"Thanks for coming."
Boomer's shoulder was taped up. "I'm here to see the doc," he said with a wry grin. "How's Ellie?"
"I don't know." It was fucking killing him. The medics had converged as soon as they'd entered, wheeling her off to God knows where to pump her full of antidotes. He only hoped it wasn't too late.
Thank God that bitch hadn't depressed the syringe more than a few millimeters, or else Ellie would be history. His stomach clenched. He couldn't even go there. Even now, he felt like a bystander in his own nightmare, powerless as they fought to undo the damage.
"What happened?" Pat asked.
"Suzi got to her. She was in on it the whole time."
Boomer balked at him. "Suzi? You're shitting me."
"No, man. I heard her say something about a sick kid before I blasted in there. She took a bribe to pay for his treatment or something."
Boomer shook his head. "Now that I think about it, it makes sense."
"How so?" Phoenix asked.
"She never said anything about a sick child, but she kept phoning home. Then there was the way she just up and left, taking the chopper back the morning of the explosion. I always thought that was lucky."
"Yeah, and she was the one who suggested to Ellie they go up on deck during the storm. That's when Ellie would have been swept overboard if Billy hadn't stepped in."
"Fucking hell," Boomer growled. "Why does it always happen to me?"
"You certainly know how to pick 'em," Blade remarked dryly.
"What happened with Henderson?" Phoenix focused on anything that would prevent him from freaking out with worry.
"He's in police custody," Pat said tersely. "Bastard's trying to cut a deal by giving up the other members of the organization."
"Typical," Phoenix grunted. "He deserves to rot in hell for what he's done."
"A representative from Xonex has arrived," Pat continued. "They're going to sue the survey company as well as Gilded Futures over the fake reports and corporate espionage. The damages could run into millions."
"Glad to hear it," Phoenix said, raking a hand through his hair. Shit, he really needed to know how she was doing. Had they gotten to her in time?
Was the antidote working?
He spun around as the doctor, a competent-looking woman in a white surgical coat, emerged. "How is she, doc?"
"We've successfully administered the antidote. Ellie is expected to make a full recovery," she declared.
Relief crashed into him, and he put one hand out against the wall. "Thank God."
Boomer thumped him on the back. "That's great news!"
Pat and Blade were both grinning from ear to ear.
"You can see her now if you'd like," the doctor offered, her hand warm on his shoulder.
He jumped up and followed her to Ellie's room. The heart monitor beeped a steady rhythm, a sound that was suddenly the most precious in the world.
Her eyes fluttered open as he entered.
"Hey." He took her hand. "You gave me quite a scare."
"Tell me about it."
He grinned. "How are you feeling?"
"I'm okay. The doc says I'm going to be just fine."
"That's so great, Ellie. I was so worried…" He broke off, emotion overwhelming him.
"I know. Thanks for bursting in when you did. How did you know?"
"Henderson," he explained. "Pat and the others caught him by the golf cabin."
"Thank goodness you came in when you did."
He choked out an apology. "Ellie, I'm so sorry I left you there alone. I should have been there to protect you."
"You can't be with me constantly," she admonished gently. "Besides, you didn't know she was involved. Nobody did. She fooled us all."
"I should have worked it out."
"Hush," she said, her voice stronger now. "You saved me, that's all that counts."
There she was, gazing up at him like he was a rock star. His heart surged, and he gripped her hand tighter.
"I couldn't stand the thought of losing you," he began, his words stilted. "Ellie, it made me realize… I love you. I don't know when it happened, but sometime over the last few weeks, I fell in love with you. I know you deserve better than me, but I just wanted you to know that."
She stared at him, a soft smile playing on her lips.
"You're my hero, Phoenix. You know that, right?"
He looked away. "But I can't make you happy. I'm a soldier. It's the only thing I know how to do. You hate danger."
"But I love you."
His head shot up to look at her. "You do?"
"Of course I do. You've made me realize I don't have to be afraid anymore. You've taught me that there are men out there who won't hurt you, who will protect you no matter what. That means more to me than any occupation you might have."
"So you're willing to look past it and… and be with me?"
She gave a soft laugh. "I'm very much looking forward to getting out of here so I can show you just how willing I am."
Phoenix leaned in and kissed Ellie. Once he started, he found he didn’t want to stop.
"Excuse me, sir. You can't do that in here," a nurse interrupted.
Only then did he release her, stepping back as Ellie burst out laughing.
The nurse, trying not to smile, added, "I'm glad you're feeling better. You'll be discharged later today. Just need a few more hours to make sure everything's okay with your vitals and there's no nasty side effects from the poison."
"Thank you," Ellie said, a blush creeping up her cheeks.
Phoenix pulled a chair close, still holding her hand. The hospital room, with all its beeps and that clean, sharp smell, suddenly didn't seem so cold. He felt lighter, like he could finally breathe after being underwater for too long. For the first time since that mess in Basra, he wasn't looking over his shoulder. He was looking forward. Ellie had done that for him.
She was more than just the woman he loved. She was his salvation. Ellie had shown him he was worthy of happiness and could be the man he’d always aspired to be. With her, he felt like he could take on the world, like the past was just that—the past. The old ghosts would always be there, but they didn't define him anymore.
Leaning close again, this time mindful of the nurse still in the room, he whispered, "I love you. And I promise, I'm always going to be here for you."
Ellie's smile was all the reply he needed, her eyes lit up just for him. "I know," she whispered back. "Because that's who you are, Phoenix. My hero, my love, my everything."