Chapter 39 Daniel
Chapter 39
Daniel
Day 5
Daniel’s brain had a canny way of compartmentalising. Much as he had after the ‘Agatha incident’, Daniel pushed the encounter with Ore to the back of his mind as he climbed the stairs back to the wheelhouse.
Dudley looked exhausted. The bags under his eyes had developed an alarmingly purple hue. He didn’t even seem to have the energy to greet Daniel when he walked in; instead he just dipped his chin in greeting.
‘Dudley, go to bed. You look terrible.’ Daniel was hoping he sounded compassionate but the order was a little too clipped, a sign of his own tiredness.
Dudley didn’t need any more encouragement though. He grunted in agreement as he pulled himself to his feet and almost stumbled out of the room. Daniel settled into the empty seat and busied himself getting the boat back on course. They’d had to take a considerable detour and now, they’d be behind schedule. Chuck would just have to deal with it. It was mad really how Daniel was still worried about Chuck’s judgement even after he’d put the whole boat in danger with his obstinance. Still, Daniel had to bear some responsibility – he was the captain after all.
It was about midday by the time Dudley came back. Daniel had been awake for almost twenty-four hours and was feeling delirious.
‘Now you look terrible,’ Dudley said dryly. Daniel made a sound somewhere between a snort and a giggle, and Dudley looked almost alarmed.
‘I think you need to go to bed, Captain – you’re starting to lose it.’
Daniel had to admit that his faculties were waning. He was having trouble remembering the order of the last day. He heaved himself from his seat and lumbered out the door.
It wasn’t until he lay down in bed that he remembered he still needed to warn Ore about his conversation with Chuck, warn her to stay away from the story she was intent on digging up. The madness of the storm had gotten in the way. He had tried to tell her when they were down in the cinema room, before she leant in and … everything got out of control.
The rest of what happened had blurred now in his mind. He knew he had wanted her, badly. That he’d almost convinced himself that maybe he was back in his own bed, fantasising again. The mix of fear, adrenaline and white-hot lust, all of it had messed with his judgement. He’d let himself go, egged on by the receptiveness of her body to his touch. He’d indulged and pulled away too late, the damage done. He could recall clearly now the look on her face, unmitigated desire and utter vulnerability. It had terrified him.
Daniel didn’t sleep well that night. He dreamt of his father for the first time in a decade. A friend had told him that he’d spotted Leroy parking his pickup in the driveway of a condo in Lake Jackson. Daniel hadn’t believed him. There was no way his dad could be so close and never have visited. It didn’t make sense. He had stopped believing his mom telling him that his dad had gone on a top-secret government mission, at about ten, the same time he discovered Santa Claus wasn’t real, but he always assumed his dad was at least far away. Lake Jackson, that was a fifteen-minute drive.
In the dream, like in real life, Daniel drove up to his address, passed his house dozens of times. Whenever he was leaving town he would detour to drive down that road and see his dad’s truck for himself. Once he spotted an old man, with his back to the road, sweeping the drive, but it wasn’t until later that his brain made the connection – that the old man was probably his dad, just fifteen years older than the last time he’d seen him.
In the dream, unlike in real life, Daniel walked up to the front door. He knocked three times and waited. He fought the instinct to run away and when the door finally opened, the man who answered looked exactly the same as the day he’d walked out. For a moment the men locked eyes and Daniel started to smile, but then the door swung shut again and just as it slammed into the frame, Daniel woke up with a start.