Chapter 23
Chapter
Twenty-Three
BIG LOOFAH
Neve
Isit beside Hope as she finally stopped being sick and has been able to sleep.
We are five weeks into the chemo now and it’s really starting to take its toll on Hope.
She struggles to keep food down and her hair has started to fall out.
She looks pale and has dark circles around her eyes.
It’s breaking my heart as there’s nothing I can do for her.
Suddenly Mummy’s magic kisses are no longer enough, she is a shadow of my little girl.
There’s a knock on the door and I carefully get up as not to disturb Hope and shuffle my tired feet to the door. I open the door and stood there is Jack with bags in his hand. “Jack, what are you doing here?” I ask.
He walks past me, placing the bags down in the kitchen. I quietly close the door. “Jack?” I question.
He turns to face me. “I told you I’m not going anywhere, It’s been over five weeks since I told you that.
Now neither one of us officially ended it, I have given you space.
But now we have officially been together over two months and though you may not see that as a long time, some get married.
” My face blanches at the mention of marriage.
“Don’t panic, I know we are not there yet.
I do know that I care about you a lot, I care about Hope a lot.
I also know that you’re about to hit the worst side effect of chemo.
You’re going to need support more than ever.
So I’ve booked time off work. I am here to help support you and Hope.
You don’t need to worry about anything other than caring for Hope,” he states.
I stand there completely stunned. “Why?”
He steps towards me and sweeps the hair from my face, smiling softly before leaning down and placing a soft kiss on my lips.
He pauses, resting his forehead on mine.
“Because it’s you.” I close my eyes, the overwhelming build-up of emotion bubbling to the surface.
My legs buckle but Jack moves quickly, scooping me up in his arms. He walks us to the sofa and I bury my face in the crook of his neck, just letting it pour out of me.
“This isn’t fair, this isn’t fair to you,” I whisper.
“I will decide what’s fair to me and staying away from you for five weeks is what’s not fair to me. It was pure torture.”
“I can’t be the partner you deserve right now. I am barely holding myself together. It’s like I have been stuck together with that crap, cheap sticky tape that comes unstuck at the slightest bit of pressure.”
He chuckles. “Well then, it’s your lucky day because I’m your fucking super glue. You won’t ever need to worry about coming unstuck again.” He kisses the top of my head.
We sit on the sofa, just him holding me. My eyes become heavy, the comfort of his hold, his scent relaxes me and I soon drift off into a sleep.
“Here, try this,” I hear Jack say.
“Eww, that’s disgusting,” Hope complains.
Jack lets out a chuckle. “Okay, what about this?”
“Oh I like them,” Hope chirps happily. I rub my eyes opening them and I see I’m led down on the sofa with a blanket covering me. I sit up and look over the back of the sofa.
“Hey, what are you guys up to?” I yawn.
“Well, I know that Hope has been feeling rubbish so we are having a taste-testing game of different things that might help her feel a little better.” Jack smiles.
There goes my heart again. I get up from the sofa and walk to them, kissing Hope on the top of her head. “So what have you found that you like so far?”
“I like the apple sauce, the banana and ginger biscuits.” Hope points to the food on the tray.
“She really didn’t like the herbal tea.” Jack smiles.
“I don’t blame you, bleurgh! Disgusting stuff.” I gag. I put the kettle on to make a coffee. “How are you feeling sweetie? Did you sleep okay? Do you need any pain meds?” I ask her.
“Mummy, I’m feeling good, I haven’t been sick,” she states cheerfully.
I smile pleased. Jack takes my mug from my hand and starts making my coffee for me. My mouth opens to protest, but he place his index finger over my lips stopping me. “Sit with Hope and put a movie on. I will make you a cup of coffee,” he orders.
I look to Hope who is smiling. I roll my eyes at her and she giggles. “Fine, no arguments from me.” I lift Hope down from the stool and we curl up together on the sofa. Jack hands me my coffee and kisses the top of my head.
“I’m just going to jump in the shower,” he states before walking off.
I smile to myself and sip my coffee and without warning Bella bursts into the flat. “Good morning my chikkas, I come baring gifts.” She places down a tray of fresh pastries. “But first I really need to pee,” she says, running off to the bathroom.
“Er Bella, I –” I try to warn her.
“Holy donkey dong!” we hear Bella shout from the bathroom. She walks back into the living area gesturing about his size with her hands. “I mean, that thing has its own postcode, no wonder you smiled so much with him.”
“Bella, watch your mouth,” I hiss.
She looks to Hope. “Jack has a really big loofah.”
I cover my face and shake my head. “I want a big loofah!” Hope shouts.
I give Bella my death stare. “Sorry babes not until you’re a grown up, then you can have your choice of all the big loofahs. Just be careful sometimes because you think they’re going to be big but in fact they’re tiny.”
“Oh.” Hope huffs.
“I know babes, life is full of disappointment. Your Auntie Bella has had a lot of disappointing loofahs, believe me,” Bella states around a croissant.
“Do you think Jack will let me use his loofah?” Hope asks excitedly.
“Christ there’s a therapy session.”
“Okay, no more loofah talk for today or maybe ever!” I clap.
Hope sighs, pulling a sad face. Bella leans forward and pats her hand. “Sorry sweetie, you never share a man’s loofah. It’s unhygienic.”
“What time is it? I feel like a wine,” I state, rubbing my temples.
“It’s 9:30 am. A bit early for a glass of wine,” Bella points out.
“Who said anything about a glass?” I counter, raising my brow.