Chapter 20
Chapter Twenty
RORY
The flutter that had been in my belly since the moment I woke up and crawled out of bed had only grown more acute as the minutes and hours ticked by.
When I cracked my eyes open this morning to the shimmer of the rising sun streaming through the wood blinds on my bedroom windows, I’d been filled with a giddy anticipation.
That anticipation was still there, no doubt about it, but the giddiness had been replaced by a nervous energy that made me feel like I was coming out of my skin.
I was constantly moving, unable to hold still for even a second for fear that the tsunami swirling around inside of me would burst free.
Tonight was the night. Cord was taking me to the Groves just as he’d promised last week before leaning in and brushing my lips with his, creating a tingle that hadn’t disappeared in six freaking days.
I wasn’t even certain this was a real date, but the way he’d spoken, the heat in his eyes as he’d asked me to dinner, it sure as hell felt like a date.
So now I was suffering from all those first date jitters that made me antsy and anxious and hyper.
Cord had been out of town, working a case for Linc, and while I hadn’t seen him, he texted and called regularly just to check in.
Each time my phone rang a ridiculous smile would pull at my lips, and Zach would give me a knowing look before rolling his eyes in that exasperated kid way, as if to say grownups are so stupid.
I’d initially worried that Cord’s sudden departure after being there nearly every single day would have a negative impact on Zach, make him feel unwanted, and he’d revert to his sullen, churlish manner.
But fortunately, my concerns were unnecessary, and Cord once again proved he was even better than I could have imagined, because those calls and texts weren’t all just for me.
We didn’t talk about a whole lot, and the conversations didn’t last long, but after each one, he’d ask to speak to Zach.
He’d ask about his day, how his room had turned out, how school had gone, little things that let Zach know he was thinking about him even if he wasn’t physically there.
And even though he tried to play it off as nothing, there was no missing the way Zach’s chest would swell and his eyes would glimmer with a hint of a smile every time he handed the phone back to me.
And every time I saw that look on Zach’s face, a warmth would spread through my entire body before centering in my chest.
But today was the day I’d been anticipating for nearly a week. Today Cord was coming back, and the cool I’d managed to hold on to while he’d been away was long gone. I was officially freaking way the hell out.
“Hey, honey, how’s it going?”
I spun around at the familiar voice and saw Eden standing across the bar from me. “Oh thank god you’re here!”
Her eyes went big as she looked around in confusion. “Uh, yeah. I’m here.”
“I need to talk to you.” I rushed around the bar and grabbed her by the hand, practically dragging her behind me as I headed toward the back office. “Mona, can you keep an eye on things for a few minutes?”
“Yeah, sure thing,” my waitress replied, giving me a curious look.
Eden’s much shorter legs scurried to keep up with my long ones as I hit the hall and all but flung her into the office, closing the door behind me before spinning to face her and collapsing against it.
“Good Lord, babe. What the hell’s gotten into you?”
“I’m freaking out!” I blurted, stating the obvious.
“Uh, yeah. I’d say so. Tell me what’s going on.”
I’d been keeping my semi/kinda/sorta date with Cord from my friends, not wanting to get my or their hopes up in case it went poorly or ended up not being what I thought it would be. But I just couldn’t hold it in any longer. “Cord’s taking me to the Groves tonight.”
At my admission, Eden’s big eyes grew even bigger, and her jaw fell open. “No way!” she shouted.
My head bobbled on a nod. “Uh-huh.”
“No freaking way!” She let out a high-pitched squeal that almost made my ears bleed before launching herself forward and wrapping me in a hug so tight that she squeezed the air from my lungs and made my ribs creak.
“Oh my god! This is so great!” She started jumping up and down, swaying side to side and taking me with her as her excitement poured out and filled the room.
“Eden,” I wheezed. “Can’t… breathe.”
“Oh! Sorry, sorry,” she mumbled, letting me go and taking a step back. Her hands were clasped in front of her mouth, and she was making an exaggerated eek face while still hopping in place. “This is just so incredible!”
I held my hands up in an attempt to calm her.
“Okay, babe. I’m glad you’re happy, but before you explode in a hail of rainbows and glitter, you should know that this isn’t technically a date.
Or at least I don’t think it is. It might be, but I’m not sure.
I mean, he ended by saying ‘it’s a date,’ but that could’ve just been a turn of phrase.
Gah! I don’t know!” I lifted my hands and raked them through my hair. “See? I’m freaking out!”
“Ror, you know as well as I do that a man doesn’t take a woman to the Groves unless it’s a date,” she stressed.
And I got her point. I so got it. The Groves was the absolute shit. Huge, gorgeous cabin tucked into the foothills, totally surrounded by trees. Soft, romantic setting, exquisite food, expensive as all get-out. Yes, I totally saw her point.
But still….
“I just don’t know,” I mumbled, beginning to pace the length of the office.
“I mean, Cord can be really sweet. Exceptionally sweet. And there have been moments where….” I thought back to all those dark, heated looks and to what I thought had been almost-kisses.
“But then he just… stopped. And now I’m all confused and flustered. And I absolutely hate being flustered—”
Now it was Eden’s turn to hold her hands up. “All right, all right. Just calm down,” she cut in, attempting to soothe me. “You aren’t making a lick of sense. Just… I don’t know, start from the beginning.”
“You know how he’s been helping me with Zach?
” She gave me a nod. Although none of them had met him yet, I’d filled all my girls in on everything that was happening.
They knew about Zach breaking the window of the bar and how Cord went and tracked him down.
They knew I lost my shit when I found out he’d been digging through trash just so he could eat, and how I’d torn into the people at Child Welfare Services and demanded Zach come live with me.
They all thought what I’d done was totally awesome, and they were eager to meet him and bring him into the fold, but I wanted time to ease him into that.
I loved my friends, adored them really, but they could be a little crazy, and I wanted Zach to be settled and comfortable with his new life before they swooped in.
And being the best friends a girl could ever ask for, they got that and didn’t push.
“Well, because of that, he’s kind of been around.
A lot. That is, until he had to go out of town for work, but he still makes sure to call him every single day. ”
“Awww,” my friend cooed, covering her lips with his fingers. “That’s so sweet!”
“Yeah.” I nodded in agreement. “It really is. I mean, I honestly don’t know what I would’ve done if he hadn’t stepped in.”
“So tell me about these moments,” she urged when I stopped talking.
I quit pacing and leaned my hips back against the desk as I finally told her all the things I’d been holding back.
“Like I said, he’s been around a lot, and it kind of feels like…
like we’re raising Zach together. So with all this time we’re spending together, there have been these moments when…
I don’t know…” Eden leaned forward, eagerness written all over her beautiful face.
“There have been times when I could have sworn he was going to kiss me.” I ignored her girly squeak and quickly added, “But then he didn’t.
He backed away and… it was like he shook it off and just pretended it never happened. ”
“How did that make you feel?”
Damn her and her insightfulness. “It pissed me off,” I admitted begrudgingly. “When I thought he was going to kiss me, I wanted it. Like, I really wanted it. Then he’d back off, and, well… it sucked.”
“Oh, honey,” she whispered, her doe eyes filling with sympathy.
I pulled in a steadying breath and tried to calm my frazzled nerves as I carried on, “One night last week, he came over for dinner, and Zach started asking all these questions.”
“What kind of questions?”
I pulled my bottom lip between my teeth and bit down before answering.
“Basically, he asked if Cord and I were a couple or just… hanging out. He didn’t use those exact words.
His were much cruder, and Cord totally got on him for that.
But when I told him there was nothing going on and that we were just friends, he didn’t believe me.
He thought we were lying, and when we finally convinced him we weren’t, he was… well, confused.”
Eden’s lips pulled into a snarky grin as she crossed her arms over her chest. “Smart kid.”
“Anyway,” I stressed, sending a glare her way, “after that all went down and Cord was heading out, he asked if I would walk him out. I followed him out to his truck, and he told me about having to go out of town for work, but he asked if he could take me to dinner when he got back.”
She visibly perked up. “What were the exact words he used?”
“Well, I said yes, he smiled real big and said, ‘Great baby. It’s a date, then. I’ll make us a reservation at the Groves.’ Then he…”
“He what?” she shouted impatiently. “Then he what?”
I couldn’t hold back the tiny smile that tugged at my mouth. “Then he leaned in and brushed his lips against mine. It wasn’t a kiss, just a brush, but it was…” I let out a dreamy sigh and whispered, “It was awesome.”
“Oh, honey. This is so totally a date!”
Her excitement finally latched on to me, pushing out all my panic. “You think?”
“Absolutely.” Her smile split her face in half. “This is so freaking great! I’ve been waiting for this to happen.” Her expression suddenly fell and she pinned me with a scowl, but there was no anger behind it. “You guys took your sweet time. I almost got knocked out of the pool.”
“The pool? You guys started a pool on when me and Cord would get together?”
She rolled her eyes to the ceiling. “Oh, don’t get all offended. If I remember correctly, you’re the one who cleaned house on the pool for Tempie and Hayes.”
She was right. I’d raked in a buttload of cash betting on when my best friend and the love of her life would finally pull their heads out of their asses and see that they belonged together.
“Point taken,” I grumbled. “So who all’s in on this pool?”
“Everybody,” she answered dramatically. “Us girls, Linc’s guys, practically the whole police department, Sally and Ralph from the diner.
Hell, even Joe Silvester and Ms. McClintock placed bets.
Some of them have already been knocked out, but I’m still in the running.
But I have to tell you, sister. You need to get the lead out.
After Laurie showed up, most of the Alpha Omega guys pushed their dates back, and I do not want to be kicked out of this. ”
The giddiness I’d been feeling just seconds ago disappeared in the blink of an eye, and a painful, frigid cold drifted over my skin. “Laurie’s back?” I asked, my voice a barely there whisper, unable to hear my own words over the blood rushing in my ears.
Sensing the shift in the air, Eden froze, her eyes shooting to me and going wide. “What?”
“Laurie’s back?” I repeated as my heart sank down into the pit of my stomach, then continued its descent until it landed on the floor with a violent thud. “When did she come back?”
“I… uh… I thought…” Eden started looking all around the room as if she was mapping out an escape route or hoping she’d just disappear. “He didn’t tell you?”
“When, Eden?”
She pulled her hands in front of her and started wringing her fingers. “Um… a couple weeks ago.”
Oh god.
“I’m so sorry, honey,” she blurted, rushing to me and grabbing hold of my arms.
Oh god.
“I had no idea you didn’t know.”
Okay. All right. Shit. This hurt. This really fucking hurt.
“But I swear, Ror, it isn’t what you think.”
I pushed away from the desk, my body stiff as a board, my movements jerky and robotic.
It felt like every one of my muscles had a weight strapped to it, pulling me down as I tried to stay standing.
“I need to get back to work,” I muttered, my voice holding every ounce of pain I was feeling in that very moment.
“Rory, please. You have to listen to me. It’s not what you’re thinking. I swear.”
“It’s fine, Eden. I’m fine,” I lied. I was so fucking far from fine it wasn’t even funny. It felt like my chest had been cut open, and if I didn’t keep pretending everything was all right, I was going to bleed out on the spot. “But I really need to get back to work.”
“Rory—” she tried again, but when I whirled around and gave her my eyes, whatever she saw in them made her stop.
“Honey, please,” I whispered, my voice as ravaged as my heart. “I love you, you know that. But I really, really need to get to work. Okay?”
“Okay, sweetie,” she returned, her voice just as quiet as mine, her beautiful eyes glistening with concern for me. “I’m so sorry.”
I leaned in and placed a kiss on her cheek to let her know I held no ill feelings toward her. “Nothing for you to be sorry for, Eden.”
Then I turned and headed back out into the bar, leaving my heart lying on the floor of the office.