Chapter 26
Chapter Twenty-Six
WEST
My house had never been this full, never had so many sounds coming from different places that I couldn’t possibly keep up with which voice was coming from where. Despite Stella’s earlier worries, dinner had gone off without a hitch.
Not even two minutes after they’d arrived, her mom, Liza, had made herself right at home in my kitchen, helping me finish cooking and shooing Stella away from any and all kitchen appliances at the same time.
If her daughter so much as attempted to set foot past the bar, she was yelled right back out by every member of her family.
I hadn’t bothered to try and hide my laughter, earning her scowl that held absolutely no heat behind those intoxicating grayish green eyes.
In the—admittedly short—amount of time I’d known her, I’d never seen her so relaxed and at ease.
The shit with O’Brien had been a constant worry weighing on her.
Even when she was trying to hide it, it was obvious that concern was still very much there, front and center.
But tonight, surrounded by her family, she blossomed.
Her eyes still held a bit of that darkness that came with the anxiety she wore around her neck like an albatross, but it wasn’t nearly as noticeable.
It had faded over the hours to a dull smudge, the light shining through enough to push it back.
Her earlier concerns about me not liking her family were completely unwarranted.
The Ryans might not have been the most conventional family out there, but the love they had for each other was obvious.
They ribbed each other every chance they got.
They laughed. They hugged for no apparent reason.
Hell, even I’d been included in the affection with her mom taking my face in her hands on multiple occasions and pulling me down to lay a smacking kiss on my cheek.
They weren’t criminals, they weren’t immoral.
They were just a family that loved the hell out of each other enjoying a meal together, and seeing Stella thrive under all of that made a warmth bloom deep in my chest, growing so big it filled everything, making me feel like I was standing beneath the sun on a bright, cloudless day.
It also made me realize that when I finally had this shit with O’Brien sorted, I had absolutely no intention of letting Stella go.
I could feel her holding herself back. She was giving me what she thought I wanted, while keeping the rest of herself tucked away behind a protective barrier.
I’d done what I could to batter at those walls, but every time I thought I’d knocked them down for good, they’d start piecing themselves back together.
I could practically hear the tick of the clock in her head, counting down the minutes until she went back to her old life and left me to mine. That wasn’t going to happen.
She hadn’t accepted it yet, but this was her life now.
No more going it alone, no more trying to fix everything by herself for the ones she loved.
And no more feeling like she wasn’t good enough.
That fucker Valentine had only reinforced that idea by pulling the shit he’d pulled, and I was going to tear it the fuck apart if it was the last thing I did.
There wasn’t a day that I woke up with her in my arms and didn’t fall just a little bit more in love with her.
She was mine. What was more, I was hers, and I fully intended to show her how it felt to be worshipped without conditions by a man who was willing to break his back in an effort to become deserving.
A loud burst of laughter jerked me from my thoughts and back into the present.
I glanced over to the kitchen that had been scrubbed clean by the Ryan clan after dinner.
Spencer was standing out on my back deck, the door open to let in the cool night breeze, helping his daughter, Sasha, throw a dingy tennis ball across the yard for Rollie.
Every time the dog bounded back up the steps, she squealed in delight.
Stella was standing around the island with her mother, sister, and Spencer’s wife, Kira.
I noticed a third bottle of wine had been opened, and the women’s faces were equally flushed as they diligently watched the three cards Stella was shuffling around on the countertop.
“Eyes on the queen. Eyes on the queen. Whatever you do, don’t take your eyes off that lady, ladies. ”
She stopped her shuffle, and Kira pointed at the middle card. When Stella flipped it over to reveal a six of hearts, her sister-in-law let out a slurred, slightly drunk “Shun of a bish!” that had the rest of the women in stitches.
“She’s something else, isn’t she?”
I didn’t bother pulling my eyes from Stella as her father came to a stop beside me where I stood near the fireplace. “Yes, she definitely is.” I lifted the bottle of beer in my hand and took a pull. “She’s something pretty fucking incredible.”
“Cheers to that.” Joe lifted his own beer, and I clinked the neck of mine against it. “I’m inclined to agree. And not just because I’m her dad.”
We both drank as we stood off to the side, content to enjoy watching everyone enjoy themselves.
“That ex-fuckface never deserved her,” Joe gritted a minute later.
I agreed wholeheartedly. “Nope.”
“Was never inclined to take care of her,” he continued. “Part of me wants to think the reason he wants her back so bad is ’cause he realizes he lost something amazing.” He shook his head sadly. “But I know it’s only ’cause he misses her taking care of him.”
I didn’t doubt that for a second.
“My baby girl’s always been the fixer of the family,” Joe sighed, drawing my attention fully to him as he shook his head, his expression full of sadness that suddenly made him look a hell of a lot older.
“That’s on me. Any problem, she was the first to dive in and solve it, and eventually, I just sat back and let her.
Never should’ve put her in that position.
She was just so damn . . . old. Even when she was a kid.
She came out of the womb that way, but that’s no excuse.
She never wanted this life. I’m a shit father for getting any of my kids into it, but most especially my Starshine.
All my girl ever wanted was to be normal.
Have a normal job, a normal marriage to a normal man.
Wanted it so damn bad, she tied herself in knots with that weasel trying to get it. ”
I couldn’t say I disagreed, or that he wasn’t in the wrong for letting his youngest carry so many burdens, but I also couldn’t say it came from a bad place. When you had three kids, I imagined it was easier to just let the most responsible one share in the responsibility.
“You fucked up,” I told him, mindful to keep my voice low so no one could overhear.
“But the fact you know that and want to do better says something. You’re not a bad man, Joe.
You cherish your family above all else. There isn’t a single one you wouldn’t lay your life down for, so maybe cut yourself a little slack.
The past is in the past. Just try and do better from here on out, yeah? ”
The man’s eyes had grown red during my little speech, his chest rising and falling on labored breaths as he fought back emotion that was all for his kids. I remained silent and let him have that time, waiting for him to take the lead and speak again once he managed to gather himself.
“You take care of her,” he stated.
“I try. She doesn’t make it easy.” I shook my head, a small grin tugging at my lips. “Damn woman pushes back at every turn.”
“But I’m guessing you still manage to come out victorious.”
He wasn’t wrong about that. “Stella’s got a stubborn streak a mile wide, but I can be just as hard-headed when I want to.”
He chuckled low under his breath. “Got no doubt about that, son. But the fact you want to try is what I like so damn much.” He turned to me, his expression growing somber as he asked, “I can trust you with her, can’t I?”
“Yes sir, without a single doubt. You have my word. I’ll protect her with everything I am.”
“Knew that by how you look at her. You’ve been watching my girl all night like she’s the most precious thing in your universe.”
“Because she is.”
“My God,” he said under his breath. “You love her, don’t you?”
I gave the man my full attention once more, my eyes drilling into his so he’d see the honesty written all over my face. “Hope you’re not expecting me to deny it.”
The corner of his mouth crooked upward. “Think I’d lose a little respect for you if you did.” He canted his head to the side toward the kitchen. “Does she know yet?”
“Nope.”
We both turned back to the women when they let out a hoot.
Serenity’s arms were in the air in victory, the card with the queen on it flipped over in the middle of the other two.
Stella was laughing behind the rim of her wine glass, and at the sight of those dimples, that warmth I felt inside was beating at my ribs, desperate to get out so it could leak into everything.
“Hope you don’t mind me asking,” he said a second later, “but is there a reason you’re keeping that from her?”
“I’ll tell her when she’s ready to hear it,” I confessed. “Right now, she’s not willing to believe it. She thinks it’s still too soon, and the truth would send her running. That’s not a chance I’m willing to take.”
“Well, I’ll be,” Joe said on a hearty chuckle. “You know her almost as well as we do.”
I downed the rest of my beer, bending forward to place the empty bottle on the coffee table, silently reminding myself to remember to throw it away later so Stella didn’t feel the need to go around and clean up after me.
“I’ve given it to you straight so far, so I hope you don’t mind a little more.”
I watched as the man visibly braced himself. “I can handle it.” I studied him closely, realizing he meant that, and it only made me respect him that much more.
I didn’t bother mincing words. “Good, because Stella’s out,” I said definitively.
“Not because I give a shit whether she spends the rest of her life picking the pockets of people she thinks deserve it, but because it’s what she wants.
You said so yourself. What she wants to do with her life is totally up to her, and I’m going to give her the time and the freedom to figure that out on her own.
I’m going to handle this shit with O’Brien for you, and then she’s done. You get me?”
He nodded solemnly. “I get you, son. But this O’Brien mess, it’s not on you to clean up. That’s on me.”
“You’re right, it is. But because I love your daughter and want her to be happy, I’m going to take care of it.
” My gaze drilled into his, my voice going even quieter as I lowered the boom.
“Hopefully you’ll take this second chance I’m offering you and do something with it that won’t keep your daughter up at night. ”
Joe swallowed thickly, his eyes filled with a multitude of emotions just then. Guilt, relief, shame, happiness, contrition. “Think it’s my turn to give you my word now.”
I nodded, relief rushing through me that Joe Ryan was able to see reason and consider what was best for his family.
“Hey, what are you two over here whispering about?”
As soon as Stella came into reach, I threw an arm out and hooked it around her waist, pulling her right into my side so I could bend my head and press a kiss to her temple.
It wasn’t nearly enough, but until our company left for the night, it would have to do.
And as badly as I wanted to get my woman alone, I was content to let the Ryans stay as late as they wanted if it meant keeping that smile on Stella’s face.
She tipped her head back, her smile still in place, but curiosity painted across her features. I hadn’t exactly shied away from being affectionate with her, even in front of her family, but I hadn’t been so blatant with it until now.
By the way she melted into me, I didn’t think she minded, but just to make myself perfectly clear, I leaned down to her upturned face and stole a kiss. “Nothing important, grift. Just guy shit.”
She quirked a brow, humor taking over her expression. “Guy shit, like sports and cars and who can burp further in the alphabet? That kind of stuff?”
“Exactly,” Joe butted in. “I won by getting all the way to Q. Your man here only made it to P. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m running a bit low.” He wiggled his beer bottle in the air. “You need a refill, son?”
“Appreciate it.”
Once Joe headed off toward the kitchen, I shifted my focus back to Stella to see her gaze bouncing back and forth between each family member. “You having fun, baby?”
Her sigh came out soft, almost dreamy. “I’m having the best time. I didn’t realize how much I’d been missing them.” Those deep pools of green and gray came back to me. “Thank you for making this happen.”
“Nothing to thank me for. They’re your family, which means they’re welcome here whenever you want to see them.”
“God,” she groaned, dropping her forehead against my shoulder. “I swear, sometimes I think you’re too good to be true.”
My arm clenched around her, holding her even tighter. “I assure you, I’ve very real.” And I’d keep reminding her of that as long as it took her to trust what we had was real and wasn’t going away.