Chapter 3
JED
I didn’t sleep well, memories of happy days with Aaron swirling round my mind blended with our recent confrontation and the lies he’d been told.
Not wanting the girls to worry about me, I pasted a smile on my face and headed downstairs.
Erin was sitting at the breakfast bar eating some cereal but the kitchen was empty otherwise – no sign of my parents, their Dalmatian, Doris, or Erin’s boyfriend, Zack.
‘Where is everyone?’ I asked after we’d greeted each other.
‘Nanna and Gramps have taken Doris for a walk, Zack’s gone for a run and Lucy’s still in bed.’
Erin and Zack were both in their first year at Newcastle University – Erin studying fine art and Zack studying marine biology.
They’d met during their first week when she’d rushed into the lift in her halls of residence just as he was racing out of it, colliding with each other and both getting covered in her milkshake.
They’d been inseparable ever since. Zack was on the university athletics team and I’d been impressed with how dedicated he was to his training, even going out for a run on Christmas Day after we’d exchanged gifts.
‘I’ve spoken to Mum,’ Erin said. ‘She wants us there for half twelve.’
That was quite a bit later than I’d expected but so typically Ingrid to say the morning and then make it the afternoon.
Her parents lived in Cranton, a village west of Whitsborough Bay.
The girls didn’t mind taking the bus, even though it meant changing in the town centre, but there was a limited service running today with it being a bank holiday so the bus wasn’t an option.
‘Okay. I’ll drop you off for then.’
‘No need. The change of time scuppers your plans with Tara so Gramps is taking us. He says he wants to come in and wish Grandma and Grandad a happy Christmas, but I think he really wants to see Aaron again.’
‘Is Aaron definitely going to be there?’ Lucy had only said presumably last night so I wondered if Erin knew for sure.
Erin shrugged. ‘Mum hasn’t said he won’t be but you know how unpredictable she is.’
‘And you still haven’t heard anything directly from him?’
‘Nothing since the restaurant. We’ve both tried.’
‘I know you have. I’m sorry it’s so complicated.’
Erin shook her head. ‘You didn’t make it complicated, Dad. Mum and Declan did that.’ She pushed back her stool and loaded her empty bowl and spoon into the dishwasher while I inserted a pod into the coffee machine.
Before our family fell apart, the three siblings had been really close, with Erin and Lucy doting on their little brother, but their relationship with him deteriorated soon after.
Declan barely gave the girls the time of day while lavishing all his attention on Aaron.
It caused resentment – understandably so – and, after the twins were born and the girls moved back in with me permanently, they barely saw Aaron.
I hated that the closeness between them had gone – another thing that Ingrid and Declan had taken away.
‘Would you like to see Aaron while he’s here?’ Erin asked after I’d made my drink.
‘I’d love it,’ I said without hesitation.
‘I’ve spent the past six years missing him and wishing things were different but this isn’t about me and what I want.
It’s about Aaron and what’s right for him.
He believes I wanted nothing to do with him so he’s hurt and he’s angry with me, which is completely understandable.
But if he hears my side and believes me, he’s still going to be hurt.
He’s also going to be angry with your mother and Declan. ’
‘But your side’s the truth.’
‘I know, but I can’t help thinking it’ll make things worse and I don’t think it’s fair to cause him even more pain.’
Erin sighed. ‘Yeah, I get that. What a mess!’
‘Tell me about it.’
Feeling my mood dipping, I gave myself a stern talking to in the shower.
I’d told Erin this was about what was right for Aaron rather than what I wanted and I needed to remain strong about that.
Much as I longed to have Aaron back in my life, it couldn’t happen.
The only way to get him onside was to tell him the truth but, if I did that, I risked seriously damaging his relationship with Ingrid and Declan and I had no right to do that.
They were his parents and I had to respect that relationship, even if I didn’t respect them.
Another thing to bear in mind was that Aaron’s home was in Australia and he was presumably only in Whitsborough Bay for another week or so until the school holidays were over.
If I blew a hole in everything he believed, I wouldn’t be around to pick up the pieces.
To protect both of us, I was going to need to accept the situation as another injustice and hope Ingrid had no more surprises in store for us.
When I went downstairs a little later, Lucy had dragged herself out of bed although she was still in her pyjamas, lounging on the sofa beside Erin. She was a little more forthright than her sister with her opinions on the Aaron situation.
‘Tell him the truth,’ she said. ‘So what if it makes things difficult for Mum? She’s the one who made a dog’s arse of it all.’
‘It’s the effect it’ll have on Aaron that he’s worried about,’ Erin told Lucy before I had a chance to pull her up on her language choice. ‘He’s just a kid.’
‘Yeah, but he’s a kid who obviously wants answers – why else would he turn up at the restaurant like that? And Dad’s the only one who can give him them.’
It was a good point and it was still on my mind when I called for Tara at half ten. Hand in hand we walked along Castle Street, through Castle Park and set off down the zigzag slope down towards South Bay. We were about halfway down when my phone buzzed in my pocket.
‘Message from Lucy,’ I told Tara.
From Lucy
Just spoken to Grandma and thought I’d better give you a heads up that you might bump into Aaron on the seafront. He’s down there with Grandad x
Incapable of sending a message without flourishes, she’d added several different emojis conveying shock. I read her message to Tara before sending a quick thank you reply.
‘We don’t have to go down there,’ Tara said. ‘We can do the seafront next year instead.’
I smiled at her appreciatively, loving that she understood how difficult I found the situation with Aaron but also that she’d talked about us being together next year without any hesitation.
Her trust in men had been well and truly shattered by her ex-husband and I felt honoured that she felt so comfortable with me so soon.
‘Thanks, but let’s stick to the plan. We’ve both been looking forward to it and Whitsborough Bay’s not that big so I can’t help thinking that our paths will cross again sooner or later. I can’t avoid everywhere he might be.’
If our paths did cross and Aaron lashed out again, it would hurt me but nothing could be as bad as the pain of having him taken away from me in the first place.
I had Tara and my family to support me so I’d get through it, but would Aaron?
The last thing I’d ever want to do was cause him more pain.
Hopefully that unleashing of anger on Dad’s birthday would have paved the way to a more positive encounter for both of us.
As we reached the bottom of the zigzag, another message arrived from Lucy.
From Lucy
BTW, Grandma told me Piper and Savannah are here too! You’d think Mum would have mentioned it. Gonna be so awks turning up with pressies for everyone except them!
Emojis for twins and presents were sandwiched between shocked, angry and confused emoji faces.
Why on earth had Ingrid made out that she was travelling on her own when she actually had all three children with her?
I could imagine Lucy blurting out exactly what she thought of her mother leaving out that vital detail and I could equally imagine Erin falling silent and retreating into herself, both girls conveying their hurt in very different ways.
What other surprises would their mother have in store for us all?
Were we going to suddenly discover that Declan was here too?