Chapter 17 #2
She nodded. ‘It wasn’t just my paintings.
He criticised everything – my cooking, my choice of paint colours, what I planted in the garden, what I wore, how I styled my hair, too much make-up, not enough make-up…
but he did it in such a clever way that it felt like I was the one making bad decisions rather than him being too fussy.
He chipped away at my self-confidence and, of course, I had nobody to turn to.
Fiona was busy with her family, my parents were in Cyprus and I hadn’t met anyone in Whitsborough Bay because I didn’t work and didn’t go anywhere. So I was completely isolated.’
‘I’m so sorry you went through all of that. You must have felt so lonely.’ I didn’t really need to clarify that – I recognised it so clearly.
‘Completely and I didn’t know what to do about it. Deep down, I knew Calvin was wrong for me but I was too scared to leave him. How would I find a job when I had a great big gap in my career history? And how would I be able to afford somewhere to live without a job?’
‘What happened?’
‘Unbelievably, he left me. Met someone else to charm, poor woman, and divorced me. I had no choice but to go to Cyprus and scrounge off my parents for a while. They were amazing about it but I hadn’t planned or expected to move back in with them in my thirties.
Then my grandad died which was absolutely devastating but that gorgeous man, bless his heart, left me enough money to buy myself this cottage. ’
‘What made you return to Whitsborough Bay when you didn’t know anyone here?’
‘I’d fallen in love with the area. I’d spent so much time exploring it and I was able to separate the beautiful setting from the ugliness of my marriage so I decided it was the place for me.
Fortunately, Calvin had moved away so there was no risk of me bumping into him and, without him controlling my life, I returned to work and, eventually, to painting. ’
‘Has there been anyone else in your life since Calvin?’
Anastasia shook her head. ‘I went on a few dates after I’d settled back here but they didn’t go well.
Calvin had really done a number on me and I wasn’t in the right headspace for seeing anyone.
Then, about a year ago, I felt ready to dip my toe in the water again and a colleague set me up with a friend of hers.
He was lovely and we did get on well, but he was far too outgoing for me.
He loved going out, particularly if it was last minute.
He’d spot that there was a band playing and get tickets for that same night and, while I’m in awe of people who can live their lives with such spontaneity, that’s not me.
I love going out for walks but, when the evening comes, I’m a homebody.
I’m also a creature of habit. I have the same routine each week and I like my life to be straightforward.
There must be a man out there who feels the same, but goodness knows where I’d find him so I’m resigned to staying single, which is no bad thing.
I’m comfortable in my own company. Does that make sense? ’
I smiled at her, relating once more. ‘Perfect sense.’
I’d been comfortable in my own company, but I’d also been lonely and I’d had so many more people with whom to interact than Anastasia had so I could imagine her desire for companionship – even if not romantic – had to be even stronger than mine had been.
There must be so many others in the same position – people without family in the area who, for a multitude of reasons, had struggled to find friends.
The seeds of an idea were forming in my mind.
The sound of the back door closing indicated Jed’s return. He joined us in the lounge moments later.
‘I’d like to stock some of your paintings,’ he said, smiling at Anastasia.
She opened her mouth but no words came out.
‘You’re a talented artist, your work deserves to be seen and enjoyed and you deserve the recognition for it. What do you think?’
‘If you were to display my work, some of yours would have to come down and it’s your gallery.
It’s too much of a liberty taking display space away from you, or sales for that matter.
’ She clapped her hand to her forehead. ‘Listen to me! As if anyone’s going to choose my work over yours.
Thanks, Jed, but I couldn’t possibly. I’m not good enough. ’
‘You are, you can and you should,’ I said. ‘Don’t let Calvin’s stupid comments stop you from fulfilling a dream.’
‘And don’t worry about the display space,’ Jed told her.
‘We’ll move things around and, as for choosing my work over yours, the reality is that art is very personal.
People have different tastes so someone who loves your style wouldn’t necessarily buy my work and vice versa.
You are good enough and I’m going to make it my personal mission to get you to believe that. ’
‘Completely agree,’ I added. ‘Why don’t you take some time to think about it?’
‘But not too long,’ Jed joked, ‘because I’m already picturing where they’ll look best in the gallery. It’s the decade of not settling, remember? You could start it off in spectacular style on your birthday by backing yourself.’
Anastasia looked from Jed to me and back to Jed, then burst into tears again. ‘I’m sorry. It’s just that I’ve spent over a decade thinking I’m a failure and now two of the most talented creatives I know are telling me they think I have some talent. It’s a lot.’
‘It is a lot,’ I agreed, ‘but it’s true.’
She wiped her cheeks and smiled. ‘Okay. I agree. Let’s give it a try.’
‘You won’t regret it,’ Jed said.
‘Thank you both for making this the best birthday ever.’
Seeing her eyes shining and that gorgeous smile made me feel like it was my birthday too. What a special day to be part of and how incredible was Jed for making this happen? I loved seeing dreams come true for people, especially when they didn’t believe in themselves.